Chapter 25 Chapter 24 Stupid Love

It suddenly occurred to me that there was still a small agreement between me and her. I remember when we were in junior high school, the two of us once said that if we were not married by the age of twenty-five, I would make do with it and marry her. At that time, she slammed into my flesh and said that she would use eight sedan chairs to carry it, and it would be beautiful.On the surface, it seems that I have to compromise because of the pain, but actually I do have this idea, no matter if you marry her, you must let her get married in a splendid manner, no matter how big the sedan chair is, whether it is a luxury car or a BMW.

Maybe she had already forgotten this agreement.So what if you don't remember?She still has to choose someone else, and now I can't even smile wryly. I didn't know what to do, and I came up with a bunch of bad ideas. Just like how many little boys liked little girls when they were young, they didn’t know how to love, they only knew to bully her, scare her, pull her braids, stuff worms in her schoolbag, and use many strange behaviors to attract her attention. I get naive when I'm with her. I wanted to attract her attention, I wanted to keep her, I thought of many ways, but until today I realized that all the things I did during that period were terrible, and they just pushed her further and further away.

But at that time, I was a fan of the authorities, and I was full of thoughts about what to do to make her care about me more, or to care about me again.I invited three roommates in the dormitory to dinner, and I wanted them to help me make suggestions.In fact, I always knew that the three idiots in the dormitory could only come up with bad ideas, otherwise they wouldn't all be dumped by their girlfriends. But at that moment, I suddenly understood the feeling of going to the doctor in a hurry.I understand why people who have been dying for a long time burn incense and worship Buddha. The first idea they gave me was to ask me to chase after a girl from Chen Yang's class, Yu Min.I know Yu Min, she has a pretty good relationship with Chen Yang, and more importantly, they are on par in every aspect.Chen Yang is lively like a rabbit, and Yu Min is lazy like a cat. They are both famous beauties in the department.

They told me that if they went after Yu Min, Chen Yang would definitely be jealous, and then he would notice me again, care about me, and like me.In this way, I believed in the "smart plan" of my roommates in a daze. I seem to have become a fool because of Chen Yang's indifference to me.No, it should be said that I was a fool, otherwise I wouldn't have just watched Chen Yang fall in love with and marry someone else. I started to chase Yu Min, who was in her class.I remember that it happened to be the first semester of my junior year at that time, and there were not many small classes in the school, most of them were major classes of the whole department.

In class, I deliberately sat behind Yu Min, looking for opportunities to chat with her.I have to say that Yu Min really looks like a cat, the movements of lazily lying on the table are not to mention charming and natural, and his speech is also slow and lazy. It took me a lot of effort to add her Renren and QQ.But her main address was indifferent to me. I chatted with her persistently for a few days. Although I received few replies, I still asked her cheekily on QQ: "I want to sit next to you, can I not?" ?” It took a long time before Yu Min replied: "It's up to you."

On the second day of class, I deliberately arrived in the classroom early, picked the seat behind Chen Yang, and sat with Yu Min.I controlled the volume and said to Yu Min in a voice that would not attract the attention of the teacher, but could be heard by Chen Yang: "The new director of the madhouse asked a patient why he was admitted to the madhouse. The patient said that I married a daughter who grew up." widow of..." I told a lot of jokes, some were normal and some were slightly ambiguous, and Yu Min lay on her textbook all the time, drowsy and yawning.When I was so embarrassed that I didn't know whether I should continue, she raised her eyes and glanced at me unhurriedly: "Oh, it's over?"

I coughed lightly, and glanced at Chen Yang secretly from the corner of my eye. Chen Yang was sitting in front, listening to the class carefully and taking notes.How I wish she would turn back, but she never did.How I wish I was like when I was a child, when I talked to other girls, she would be reluctant.Even if she just turned her head and stared at me, even if she gave me a disdainful look. But she didn't, she didn't have it for two whole hours.After class, she walked away holding her roommate's hand as if nothing had happened. I was so scared of her getting away from me that I forgot about her character.In terms of love, she is an extremist. What she yearns for is the kind of pure and single-minded love, and she only wants that kind of love.

My self-righteous little trick will only make her feel that my words and deeds are different, and that I treat love like a child's play.I forgot the lesson that happened to Zhao Qianqian, and I forgot that this would only make her hate me more and more. Not only did Chen Yang not contact me, but he was even more indifferent to me.She started ignoring me, stopped calling me for dinner, stopped taking notes for me, and stopped talking to me when she met me on campus. I was disheartened, and realized that what I had done could not arouse Chen Yang's interest, so I quickly gave up.One day, I overheard Yu Min digging out his ears and asking Chen Yang: "That guy named Yang seemed to be on good terms with you in the past? How did you stand him before? My ears are so bad these days." I'm so annoyed by him."

Later, this matter was circulated in the department for a long time, and I became the laughing stock of others after dinner. When I was a freshman, I met a netizen on the Internet, who was a sister from the same city who was four years older than me.At that time, my thoughts were very simple. I thought that there were some things that I couldn’t say to the people around me, but I felt uncomfortable in my heart. Anyway, she was a stranger, and it would not affect anything if I told her, and I would feel better. This sister has a high emotional intelligence, is patient and gentle, and will give me some good advice.

Although timid and cowardly, I never put it into action.Because chatting with her is very comfortable, every time I have something on my mind, I will talk to this sister.We chatted on and off like this for a year or two. Recently, Zhao Yi told her about Chen Yang and me on QQ.This time she didn't give me advice, but threw out a sentence: "Or let's meet." I am also a normal man, not stupid, of course I know what it usually means when male and female netizens meet, it is nothing more than sex.After thinking about it, I suddenly had a very evil idea - what would Chen Yang think if he knew that I had a one-night stand with a strange woman?

I'm going to tell her about it.In this way, she will care about me again, right?It doesn't matter if she scolds me, hits me a few times, pulls my ears and calls me a bastard, as long as she has emotions in front of me. Don't treat me indifferently like now, don't put on a nonchalant expression, don't treat me like an insignificant stranger anymore...as long as she shows a little care. Thinking of this, I posted a smirk on QQ: "Dress up nicely." The elder sister also replied with a shy expression: "Yes." Meeting netizens is always a very embarrassing thing. I hesitated until the moment before meeting, feeling that I was too embarrassing.Just when I wanted to retreat, that sister appeared.I have forgotten what she looks like now, probably because she looks ordinary and has no special features, but she has a good figure and is quite sexy. I was very nervous and overwhelmed.Fortunately, that sister is much easier to get along with than I imagined.We ate and chatted, and drank some wine. Speaking the truth after drinking, I told her many things that I wanted to say but couldn't say that I suppressed in my heart like Xianglin's sister-in-law, and told her over and over again. She didn't show an expression of impatience, but enlightened me and comforted me. "Poor people must have something to hate. Although you are not a good thing, but to that girl named Chen Yang, you are quite infatuated." She smoked familiarly, and held me on the Hands on the table. I was a little uncomfortable, but I didn't wave my hand, I just smiled wryly: "It's a pity that she doesn't want me." "The little girl's requirements for feelings are pure, and those with little experience are like this." The sister took a long puff of cigarettes, and then let out a long breath, "Because of this, it is so easy for her to meet the so-called true love." .” I seem to understand what that sister said, but I don't seem to understand it. After the meal, I followed my sister to the hotel logically.When I got to the hotel, I started to hesitate again.Am I doing this right or wrong?I feel like one of those people who take drugs out of curiosity, a spur of the moment, and a lifetime of bad karma.I panicked. The elder sister saw my hesitation, hugged me and said, "You will stay with me tonight. I will go back to my hometown to get married next week, and I will never pester you." I'm not a good man, and thinking of getting Chen Yang's attention, I gritted my teeth and hugged her to the bed.I tried to kiss her like Chen Yang, but that sister turned her head away from me. I stopped and said, "Or we'll forget it." She hugged me and said with a smile, "What's the matter? It's all here." I undressed and she undressed.Her figure is indeed as sexy as I thought it would be.But the funny thing is, I didn't respond. Even if she helped me in various ways, I still couldn't get into the state.I don't know what's wrong with me, it turned out that everything was normal when I was with Zhao Qianqian. She reassured me that it was a psychological disorder and it was not a big deal.I was embarrassed and didn't know what to say. I put on my clothes and lay on the same bed with her, and fell asleep for the night.The next day, I sent her home and went back to school myself. Before we parted, she told me: "Don't do stupid things anymore. The other party can't read minds. If you don't tell her, she won't know your true thoughts." Although I can't remember her appearance clearly, I always keep this sentence in my heart. Back at school, I went downstairs to her bedroom again.I called her to go downstairs, it was already a little chilly on campus in October.Because of the fog, the surroundings are blurred, and it is a bit hard to see clearly. Chen Yang walked towards me in a lemon-colored sweater.With her hands in her pockets, she saw me and asked lightly, "What's the matter?" I put my hands on her shoulders like in the past, and pretended to be relaxed while walking and said: "I had 419 with someone else last night." She, I just forgot all about it like a fool. She stopped, shook off my hand on her shoulder, looked at me with a look of disdain, and said word by word: "You are disgusting." If something once belonged to me, I can take it back.But if she never belonged to me, how can I snatch her? I thought I would be satisfied as long as she didn't put on an indifferent poker face to me, as long as it proved that she had me in her heart.But when I heard her say "You are disgusting" word by word, I felt as if I had been pricked by a needle. After she finished speaking, she turned around and was about to go back to the dormitory. I pulled her arm as hard as I could, pulled her into my arms with a few hard tugs. I hugged her so tightly that her head was just buried in my chest.I used to be a little shorter than her, but now I am 1.83 meters and she is 1.63 meters. We are not what we used to be. She struggled in my arms.The more violently she struggled, the tighter I hugged her, and gradually, she stopped struggling and asked me coldly: "Have you had enough?" For a long time, I thought I was protecting her by her side, but I was wrong, I kept hurting her all the time.I dropped all dignity and begged, "Please, don't say that about me, please." She didn't speak for a long time.I lowered my head and kept begging her: "Shall we go back to when we were kids? When there were only the two of us." "Impossible." She pushed me hard, with a lot of strength.I am not afraid of pain, but I love her.I let go of my arms around her. She wrinkled the word "Chuan" between her brows, looked at me excitedly and said, "I beg you, I beg you for one thing, okay?" I let her speak. She said fiercely: "Let's not meet again from now on, okay? We will treat each other as strangers from now on. We deleted each other's phone, QQ, Renren, Weibo...don't contact each other again, okay?" ? Shall we go our separate lives? Please." I froze there.I thought that maybe one day I would part ways with her and never see each other again, but I didn't expect this day to come so soon. I thought of those dreams I had of separation.I remembered her laughing and laughing reaction when I mentioned to Chen Yang that I always had that kind of dream.Dream curses generally come true.Not reconciled, I angrily asked her loudly: "Say it again!" She was so calm to the point of numbness, as if she was dealing with a stranger.No, I'm not as good as a stranger.At least towards strangers, Chen Yang is polite and friendly. "I've made it very clear, please don't contact me again." She turned her head and walked resolutely to the dormitory. If life is like making a movie, I will definitely cut out what I just said and edit it again.I would change all the lines and say to her: "Hey, girl. I struggled for a long time and found that the person I like is still you. I can't forget you. It doesn't matter if we can't be together, as long as I can be with you. " I would say to her: "Can I study abroad with you? If you disagree, I will sit here and cry like a shrew. I will make up a lotus flower song, find a bowl and sing while knocking, and the whole school will be shocked." Everyone knows that you abandon me and don't want me." ... It's a pity that life, let alone editing, can't even go backwards. Her residual warmth and fragrance still remained in my chest, I wanted to chase after her, but my legs couldn't move away as if they were filled with lead.I wanted to lie and tell her that nothing happened, but I couldn't open my mouth, and I couldn't lie to her. In addition to being sad, I also had a great deal of frustration.I shouted at her back: "Don't regret it!" She didn't look back. I continued to shout: "You said that!" She still didn't look back. I shouted again: "In the future, if you are broken in love, don't come to my house!" She still didn't look back. My mood sank, and I said in an almost begging tone: "Is this considered a breakup?" She stopped for a moment, then continued walking without looking back. The school's wake-up bell rang.People came out of the dormitory building one after another, seeing Chen Yang and I breaking up friendship, many people stopped to watch.In fact, I think there were people watching before the bell rang. Her voice and I were so loud. But I don't care.I just want to act like in "Dragon Ball", even if there is only one person who has the wish to make us get back together, I will collect it and become my redeeming power. "What is this? What is it?" I seemed to be crying, because the wind was blowing on my face and it was cool. She walked straight into the dormitory building, and when she reached the hall at the entrance of the dormitory, she turned a corner and disappeared, and she couldn't even see her back. Although the cool autumn wind is very chilly, it is not enough to blow me awake.After returning to the dormitory, I started calling her number over and over again, but couldn't get through.I think she blacklisted me. I snatched the phone number of the boss in the dormitory and called it over and over again.The first time I got through, I said "Hello" in surprise, and then hung up the phone.Dial again, the line is busy, dial again, still busy. I snatched the mobile phone of the third child and called over and over again, borrowed the phone of other dormitory people and called over and over again... Her mobile phone was turned off. I went to QQ and found that her profile picture, who had been hiding from me all this time, had been grayed out.I sent her a message, but it couldn't be sent. I am no longer her friend.I am not her friend in school, she actually deleted all Weibo, and changed her avatar to a dead black. Is she saying goodbye to the past?Are you going to say goodbye to me?Is it just like this and never see you again?I can not be reconciled.