Chapter 15 "Light of the Earth" Spend the days before parting

Spend the days before parting together (1) 10 He returned to spend the days before parting with her calmly and respectfully.On sunny mornings, he painted her portrait.There are dignified color blocks on the oil painting, and she sits there quietly, staring at an empty direction.Climb the mountain together, climb over the layers of green along the winding path, and listen to the wind on the top of the mountain.After returning home, he helped Huai in the art tutoring class and revised sketches for the children.Clean the house thoroughly and cook delicious meals together.Buy fresh grapes and make red wine at home in glass jars.At dinner time, pour out two glasses on the small table to drink.Walking past a coffee shop, he walked over and sat down to play an unfamiliar piano piece for her, full of mistakes, she laughed.Holding a large bouquet of snow-white violets, we visited my mother's grave on a rainy morning.Plant flowers and plants together, pick off the blooming gardenias, put them in a bottle and keep them in clean water, put an aspirin, and spend the last summer together in the long-lasting spice.

The flock of geese going south leaves the last distant shadow in the sky.At the beginning of autumn, he wrote to her alone on the train going north. Huai: Zhan Xinjia. You saw me off yesterday, but we didn't have much to say to each other.People say that great love is speechless, and big words are rare.It's like this pen has been choked up for a long time, and I want to say something, but I don't know where to start.Vaguely perceive the power of time.But the thoughts on the road increased in vain, and I couldn't help but write it down. At this time a few years ago, you and I were sketching in the forest of Lingxi.Times have changed, and I heard that roads were built in that place the day before yesterday, and cars were not allowed to pass.Do you remember one or two of the clear streams and lush forests in the mountains?I want to re-read it, but I'm afraid that I will see unnecessary and unnecessary thoughts.Presumably there is no need to go back.Right.

When he was young, he was impetuous and violent.Recently, Si Zhiyou feels ashamed.It is only now that I gradually understand that life, or rather fate, which I have always complained about or disdained, has given me such great blessings and forgiveness in such a long process.Taught me to feel apprehensive when I am grateful.You know how sad it was in the old days when my mother and I treated our own relatives badly because we were demanding and resentful of life. How to arrange life rigorously, try to do the right thing with a serious attitude, and stick to it to the end, this will be a serious problem I face.It is true that life is vague, but if you do every little thing well with a serious attitude, you can still discover infinite meaning in it.Although such a goal is urgent for me, it is also difficult to achieve.It takes a long process.

I just miss you so much.I am well aware of the time and effort you have spent in growing up with me so kindly.People say great kindness without saying thank you.I will never forget this kindness. Looking back on the way I grew up, the things that I thought were earth-shattering and life would be worse than death, now look like they are just ordinary things in the world.It is indeed sad to see one's youth sinking in time but helpless.Late at night recently, I often miss the wanton boyhood in the past.At that time, he was still living in his own home, and he was also an ordinary child who wanted to study hard.Every night, I am used to sitting in the study and reading carefully, but I can't help but want to draw.Later, good fortune tricked people, I was young and ignorant, I committed suicide, and I didn't want my mother to die soon.Henceforth, I live with you, saved from infinite grace.It's a pity that such a good thing is gone forever.On this journey, I still miss those distant things about caring.

Some regrets, because of my recklessness and ignorance, I have always been unwilling and offended.I am very sorry for this. After all, I love you most.And I have always been negligent and unwilling to express it. This feeling is of great significance to me. These seven years have passed so quickly.I am at peace knowing that in the end I should grow and take on my own.Your existence is the echo of Night Breeze fleeing.Repeatedly rippling several times, it finally dies forever. Did you ever know that because of this distance, my growth has been attached.If one day I can hold hands with you and listen to the wind singing, I can't confirm this happiness.Having seen my previous frivolity and fragility, I begged myself to be tolerant and peaceful.Be wise and do your best to be good.This is not a contradiction.

Only when and where can I reunite with the old days and send you a bouquet of camellias that are in full bloom.Because in my limited memory, you are always so beautiful and full of simple hope.On your skirt, the fragrance of my whole boyhood is soaked. Before going north this time, I visited my mother's grave, and I was in a calm state of mind.Since the world is sorry, it should be forgiven.Now, he was able to reread his mother's suicide note calmly and calmly.The teachings in it also touched me deeply.But for this sake, I should be counted as old.How sad it was in those days when there was no redemption, mutual hatred and estrangement.I am remorseful.It's a pity that all understanding and interpretation will take time to brew.In this way, it is often too late.

Spend the days before parting together (2) And how can I forget that I have written a piece of condolence without words for seven years since I was twelve years old in summer.You probably won't be able to fully understand even a ten-thousandth of the meaning behind this metaphor. I still leave this summer, and you can just use this to confirm your always-held view that my feelings for you are only due to ignorance, like falling in love with a stream because I have never seen the sea.This conclusion is irrelevant.As long as the facts exist, it does not matter whether the conclusion is known or not.In the future, there are indeed many scenery to see along the way.But that doesn't mean they'll be any better than they used to be.It cannot be explained that I will forget the scenery along the way in the past.Because I firmly believe that people should not base their expectations for the future on contempt for the past and disregard for the present.

A young man bids farewell to the ignorant, presumptuous and shallow and sad years, and gradually changes into another more peaceful and tenacious posture, living an honest life.The metamorphosis in this can naturally outline the pain of life.I also believe that such a transformation is correct.It is the inspiration after living with you, and the medal bestowed on me.Man is such a small individual, if he has no patience, he will feel more uneasiness in life than objective existence.I used to be so greedy and dissatisfied.I have never had time to say thank you for your tolerance and care for me.I am afraid that this kind of formal gratitude is superfluous.

I saw a movie many years ago called "There Was a Fool", and a line of dialogue in it left a deep impression on me. Mom, is the cross a sign of love? yes kid.And love often means a cross too. I have vibrations.If we know that this is a process of extinction, is it necessary to go through it?It's like knowing that you will die, so is it necessary to live again?We are always unable to bear the interrogation of life.So is love.Blindness can be exchanged for a long time. I am blind and cowardly.Because what I love is you. It rained endlessly along the way.The sound of rail vibrating is reassuring.At dusk, the long and short streets, far and near, were soaked and limp.The sky is as dim as a layer of tea stains in an old enamel cup.In my memory, this is the hometown where I grew up.It is ambiguous, cowardly, ordinary, kind but ugly.Just like human nature.I have grown up in this beautiful and regretful world.

Because my feelings for you are too long and stable, you can't believe it.And this just confirms what you said, the prophecy that everything will eventually perish. You know, that's not what I want. But, isn't that what I want? good luck. Jian Sheng Not long after entering university, he received a reply from Huai.A few words in the letter: Jian Sheng: receiving a letter from you. In fact, for me, all willing things are just pleasure and self-salvation.I didn't feel the heavy and hard work it took.After all, all this counts as the responsibility and return of your feelings, and there should be nothing wrong with it.

Jian Sheng.I'm married. Life is still fine.don't read. Huai He had grown into a man of peace in his own opinion.However, seeing the news on the letter paper, I still felt a dull pain in my chest.Clutching the letter paper, he buried his head deeply.She is married.She's completely gone.In the future, there is still a long road ahead. But he knew that there was no more suitable ending than this.