Chapter 3 third chapter

I said word by word: "Shi Juansheng, it's up to you to change your mind. Divorce or not is up to me, but let me tell you, I can't help you insulting me at will. Your parents came here by themselves. I didn't mobilize relatives and friends to persuade you. Turn back." I stared at him, "To be honest, at this moment, I don't want you to turn back, but please be careful with your mouth." Juansheng sat down on the sofa, "Zijun, I beg you to promise me a divorce, I really can't take it anymore." He covered his face with his hands. Ping'er in my arms raised his head and asked, "Why are Mom and Dad arguing? Why?"

I patted him on the shoulder, "Don't be afraid, don't be afraid, stop making noise." I hugged him on my lap, "Go to sleep for a while, mom will hold you." Ping'er buried his fat head in my arms. I stroke his hair. ——He can't hold on now, I smiled wryly, as if everything was caused by me, and he was the victim. At that moment, I saw him transparently. What does such a man want him to do?I still have a pair of hands, and I still have years to come.It may not be happiness for another woman to get him. If he can lose his wife for more than ten years in ruthlessness, he may do it again in the future.

I lightly patted Ping'er on the back, "Okay, I promise you, I will divorce right away." He raised his head, and at that moment his eyes were filled with complex lights, both happy and surprised. I looked at him coldly, with only sadness in my heart, but no anger. "Really?" he asked incredulously. "real." "What are the conditions?" I look at Ping'er's apple face. "Come back every day to see Ping'er and An'er." "Of course, of course," Juan Sheng rubbed his hands excitedly, "this is still your home, if you like, you can stay here overnight."

I don't turn my face away, I don't want to see his ugliness. "I have a friend who is a lawyer. He can immediately go through the formalities for us and make up the separation. He can prove that we have been separated for two years and we will divorce immediately." Juansheng proposed in a tentative tone. My eyes darkened, and I took a deep breath.It's too late to wait for a year and a half, Juansheng feels like living in hell with me at this moment, well, I'll help him escape from birth. "Is there such a thing?" I heard myself say, "Okay, you go to the lawyer's office to arrange a time, and I will sign with you."

For a moment he froze. I raised my head bravely, "I'll look for a house tomorrow, and I'll let you know when I find it, don't worry." I carried Ping'er into the room, put him on the bed, and covered him with the quilt. This child has been spoiled by me, as delicate as a girl. Back in the living room, seeing Juansheng still standing there, I asked in surprise, "Aren't you leaving yet? It's none of your business here," He stared at me blankly. After a while, he said, "She wants to see you." "Really, let's talk again when we have a chance."

Even I admire this composure. "Then I'm leaving," he said. "Let's go." I said and picked up the newspaper. He lingered for a moment, then turned to open the door. I heard the sound of closing the door, and when I lowered my head, I realized that the newspaper in my hand was rattling and shaking like a fallen leaf. I was surprised and thought: Why is this happening?It turned out that my hands were shaking too, no, no, I was shaking all over, I yelled, threw down the newspaper, rushed to the study, poured a small glass of brandy, and drank it down. The phone rang, and I hurried to answer it, as long as someone could talk.

"Are you back?" It was Tang Jing. "Yes." I answered. "Have you seen Juansheng?" she asked. I recounted the situation just now.I just felt that my breath was not smooth, and I was a little panting. Tang Jing was silent for a long time, I thought she hung up the phone, and after feeding her a few times, she said, "That's fine." I thought about it and answered: "His time is precious, so my time is not precious." But this sentence is similar to the person who will be beheaded shouting "He will be a good man again eighteen years later" in the execution ground, and it has no power at all. .

"I'll come to your place after get off work." Tang Jing said. "Thank you." "You're welcome." Her voice sounded sullen. Finally divorced, forced to go to Liangshan. I tiptoed into the room and stared at Ping'er who was sleeping. I leaned against the edge of the bed, with my head resting on the bedpost. I didn't want to change my position for a long time, and gradually my forehead felt a little numb, and my heart also felt a little numb. Where am I going when I leave this home!Learn to be self-reliant like Tang Jing, never complain, never complain?I don't know if it's still too late for me to change careers?

A pair of soft hands rested on my shoulders, I raised my head, and An'er in school uniform stood in front of me. I walked to the study with her and sat down.I have something to say to her. I said, "An'er, your father and I have decided to break up, and I will move out." An'er was very calm, and she immediately asked, "Will that woman move in?" "No, your father will move in with her. The grandparents will come here to take care of you." Ann nodded. "You have to take good care of your brother." I said. She nodded again. "I try to come back to see you every day."

"Are you looking for a job?" she asked me. "I'll give it a try." "You failed to keep Dad?" she asked again. I smiled wryly, "I am a failed woman." "Brother will cry and cry." "I know," I said hard, "he'll get used to it." An'er scratched and scratched on the table with one finger, and she asked, "Why doesn't Dad want you?" I raised my head, "I don't know, maybe I'm no longer beautiful, maybe I'm not considerate enough, maybe like you said a few days ago, I didn't work hard enough... I don't know."

"Are you going to marry again?" An'er was suddenly very uneasy, "Will you have a baby with another man? Will Dad have a baby with that woman?" I had no choice but to comfort her as much as possible, "No, mom won't, mom's home is also your home, no one is more important than the two of you." An'er was a little relieved. "How can I tell my brother?" Another problem came. I thought about it for a long time, and the torment in my heart was like being tortured. Finally, I said: "I told him myself that my mother will go to another place to study for homework and prepare for the exam." "Will he believe it?" Ann asked irritably. I glanced at her and lowered my head to contemplate. "Mom," she said, "I will never get married when I grow up. I don't trust men, not even one." Her voice was full of hatred. "Don't think so, maybe it's your mother's fault—" I said hastily. "Mom, you are indeed wrong, but Dad should tolerate you for the rest of your life, because he is a man and he should love you." After hearing An'er's words, I was in a daze. "Poor mom." She hugged me. I also hugged her tightly.Ann has not been so close to me for a long time. "I think my mother is both pitiful and hateful," she said. "Why?" I grinned. "It's pitiful because your father abandoned you, and it's hateful because you don't grow up." Her tone was like an adult. "Why don't I grow up?" I was surprised. "Too unfeminine." She blurted out. "Nonsense, you want your mother to run around the house in black gauze and transparent pajamas?" I suddenly felt that this bitter tone resembled Zuziqun—who said we sisters are not alike?At this moment, I was still in the mood to tell a joke. An'er refused to accept it, "I don't see you acting like a baby with your father, making a fool of yourself." I resentfully said, "I don't understand these things. I am a woman from a good family, and I think that there is a sound of gold and stone." I added, "Good women don't bother with these things." An'er asked: "Is Aunt Tang Jing a good woman?" "Of course." I replied without hesitation. "I've heard Aunt Tang Jing call and beg a man to do something for her. Her voice is like honey. If you don't believe me, you can ask her." An'er said confidently, "The man immediately agreed to everything." I am more sad. real?Bronzing also comes in this set?Thinking about it, she must not only understand, she must be smart, otherwise, how can a woman live through so many cold and heat outside?What women can use is nothing more than the primitive impulse of men. "Really?" I asked my daughter, "Have you ever seen Aunt Tang Jing acting like a baby?" "I've seen it before. There was another time when she was talking to her father, with her arms wrapped around her, leaning against the door frame, her head slanted against the door. She looked weak and her voice was very low. Then she laughed." "Really? There is such a thing?" I didn't even know. An'er said, "Mom, you can't see anything in your eyes except your brother." I thought blankly: I would rather be the one who seduced Shi Juansheng. I'm so confused, I never knew that other women would covet my husband, and my husband, who is only a flesh and blood body, cannot withstand a blow. The doorbell rang, and Ann went to open the door. She raised her voice and said, "It's Aunt Tang Jing." This ghost Tang Jing is always beautiful, she is also a career woman, and she wears the same fashionable clothes, which looks frivolous on Ziqun, but Tang Jing has a beautiful style, which is different from others. I sighed, "You are the only one who sympathizes with me." Tang Jing glanced at me, "You are not necessarily worthy of sympathy. At this moment, there are many women with DSWS status. Without a man, they can't live? The society will not sympathize with you." Ann heard it from the side and asked before me: "DSWS? What is that?" Tang Jing smiled and replied: "The woman of DIVORCEDSEPERAIEDWIDOWEDSINGLE." I murmured: "It's really fresh." Tang Jing took off her leather boots and put her legs on the coffee table. I asked her, "Do you leave work early?" "Go to the doctor." "What disease?" "Plastic doctor, it's not a disease." I was surprised, "Where are you going?" "Don't be so old-fashioned, okay?" Tang Jing smiled, "Plastic surgery is not news," she sipped her tea, "Plastic eye bags, so as not to keep asking me: Miss Tang, you didn't sleep well last night? I can't stand it." Such care." "But plastic surgery—" "You want to tell me that only Taiwanese female singers have plastic surgery?" Tang Jing smiled, "Female singers also eat, do you still eat? It is very right to make yourself look better. Nowadays, fashion and beauty magazines publish relevant articles in every issue. The details are like buying a new dress." I was in a daze, "I really can't keep up with the trend, Miss Tang." "You are not exposed to wind and rain, so you don't need to rectify your appearance." "Seriously," she put down her teacup, "Yu Jun, didn't you say you wanted to meet Gu Lingling?" "Yes, I did." "She wants to see you too. I stood up, "You seem to know her very well." I stared at Tang Jing, "What role are you playing, is it a human or a ghost?" Tang Jing pointed to my nose and said, "If I hadn't known you for more than 20 years, based on your words, I would still consider you a puppy." I said, "I'm sorry." I sat down again. "You standard little woman." She scolded. "Where is she? I'm going to see her." I risked it. "She's at home." Tang Jing said. "Is Juansheng there too?" I couldn't help asking. "Where is Juansheng free? He's at the clinic." "Go right away, let me see how beautiful she is." I said sadly. "She is not beautiful." Tang Jing said. At first I thought Tang Jing was helping me, but then I realized that Tang Jing was the most fair.She said one is one and two is two. She took me to a first-floor apartment in an upper-middle uptown complex. It was actress Gu Lingling herself who came to open the door. At first I thought it was a Filipino maid, similar to our Michelle.Short permed hair, dark skin, ordinary facial features. It was only when Tang Jing called her that I realized she was Gu Lingling. I was extremely surprised, so the expression on her face was very natural. Such a person! There is no resemblance to the vixen in my nightmare, too ordinary and inconspicuous, even the clothes are old, just like Abasang.I really don't know whether it's sadness or joy, but just relying on her virtue, she robbed me of my life? Juansheng really went crazy. This Gu Lingling is three times uglier than me. She beckoned us to sit with a stiff smile on her face. She probably didn't want to call me "Mrs. Smith", so I couldn't find it. Her hands are big and thick, as if she is used to doing work, her fingers are bald, and she hasn't painted Kou Dan. Such a homely woman. She said, "I heard that you agreed to divorce." I nod. Juansheng actually asked me to take her, am I worse than her? She breathed a sigh of relief, "I told Juansheng that educated women would not get involved in this kind of thing." Is it a compliment? But what he said was also very reasonable. "I've been there myself," confessed so frankly, "It's been a year since I got divorced." At this time, a girl as tall as An'er came out of the room and called "Mom" to Gu Lingling. This is probably the Leng Jiaqing that An'er mentioned.The daughter looks similar to her mother, dark and solid, with a pair of glasses on the bridge of her nose, compared to her.An'er is really a cute little Angel. Hearing that she has a son, Shi Juansheng dares to be emotionally wrong, how is this different from his own home?But he gave up his own child and ran to face another man's child. If this is love, then the magic power of love is too great? The way of life he despises now is exactly the same as the way of life he will live in the future. I know he will regret it. Gu Lingling's home is not as resplendent as the homes of ordinary celebrities. It can be seen that it is newly renovated, is it the money that Juan gave birth to? The main color is light coffee. It is obvious that I want to imitate the refreshing and simple style of European and American small families. Generally speaking, there is nothing wrong with it, but the details are very rough: a set of leather sofas is made locally, the curtains are forgot to align flowers, teacups Doesn't match the plate. What Juansheng gave up was more delicate and elegant than all these. Why did he do this?Could this unattractive woman be able to satisfy him physically? I heard Tang Jing say: "...that's fine, after we meet, you can speak directly if you have something to say." I don't think so, Tang Jing is too hypocritical, what do I have to say to this woman?We have met each other, so that we don't know how to avoid them if we meet them in some occasions, that's all.I have been stupid all these years, and I will learn to be smart from today on. Then, Tang Jing pulled me, signaling to leave, and we stood up. Then Gu Lingling was embarrassed to say: "There is no entertainment." The entertainment skills are better than ours, they are actors... Maybe Tang Jing will say that I am old-fashioned again, sinking a boat with one shot. We go to the door.I met an old man coming in head-on, with his back bent and his head full of white hair, he looked like a Jiangbei tailor.Tang Jing nodded towards him. The old man glanced at us and went into the house familiarly.Gu Lingling closed the door. I was bitter in my heart, so I grabbed Bai Tangjing, "You know her family very well." Tang Jing stuffed me into the car. "Do you know who he is?" "Who?" I said angrily. "That's Gu Lingling's ex-husband, named Leng Weiyang, a well-known screenwriter back then, with a script worth tens of thousands." I gasped: "What-what!" I was really surprised, so an old man?Fifty-five if not sixty-five, a ragged look, she married him?My God, do you know this life? " It's outrageous, I thought all the female celebrities were extravagant, well-clothed and well-fed, and when they went out, they took a Rolls-Royce, and the sons who waved to a car, wore hundreds of carats of diamonds on their bodies, whatever they wanted, and then wore them all day long. Wearing fox fur (fox spirit), wearing high-heeled slippers, the toes are painted bright red, just waiting for her lover's wife to come and settle accounts with her. Not that. Who knew that wasn't the case.I was dumbfounded by the strong wind blowing my face. "It's cold," Tang Jing said, "roll up the windows." As if in a fog, I looked towards Tang Jing. Tang Jing said: "I know what you are thinking. You have been in the warm nest for too long, and it is inevitable that you don't understand things outside." It's unbelievable, Shi Juan desperately abandoned his wife and children, ran to pick up the old man's old shoes, and had to help him support his two children?Could this be a debt from a previous life? No wonder my in-laws would come out and speak for me. Juansheng is unlucky and unlucky. "This woman!" was all I could say. "It looks good on stage with makeup on." Tang Jing said, "Many people admire her acting skills." I said angrily: "That is naturally first-rate." "She also has some money on hand, and it's not all dependent on Shi Juansheng." Tang Jing glanced at me. "If you don't rely on it now, you will depend on it in the future. Who doesn't know that Western medicine is a gold mine." I said. "At least part of this gold mine is still yours." Tang Jing said: "Now I really want to talk about your future." "After meeting the big star Gu Lingling, I feel very optimistic about my future." I said sarcastically and angrily. "Don't underestimate her," Tang Jing sighed, "She has a lot of skills, and she can earn hundreds of thousands of dollars when she appears on the stage in Nanyang." "This society worships money too much." I said with emotion. Tang Jing smiled and nodded, "It's not what I expected, it's society's fault." I beat Tang Jing's thigh vigorously. Tang Jing said: "Hey, be careful, my foot is on the clutch—hey, Zijun, do you remember when you were young, you couldn't fight me with your mouth, so you liked to hit me?" Our thoughts flew back to the plains of our childhood, and I became sad, how time flies so fast, more than 20 years in a blink of an eye, people are not afraid of getting old, most afraid of nothing.I have been lied to by life. "Don't think too much, come, I'll take you to a good place to eat." I said: "Tang Jing, take me home, my son wakes up and doesn't see me, he's going to cry again." "Pretend you are dead." Tang Jing said, "Why are you so flattering? Your husband thinks you are no longer qualified to be a mother and wife. You still don't believe in evil? Sometimes you have to think about yourself." I smiled wryly: "Tang Jing. I really don't know whether you are evil or righteous." "You don't care, anyway, I have never seduced someone's husband or ruined someone's family." She raised her nose. "Perhaps," I said sadly, "things must rot and worms grow." Tang Jing nodded, "You have a good attitude and are very objective. These days, who is a good wife and who is a vixen? There is no one-sided situation about who is good and who is loyal. There are still more than ten layers between black and white. There are different shades of gray, and there are many faces to a person's personality, Zijun, you may be a failed wife, but you are a good friend." I didn’t say anything after that, since I was a child, I was not the kind of sensitive and worrying girl. Tang Jing also laughed at me, “Beauty is beauty, and there is no soul.” Back then, Juan Sheng and other suitors fell in love with her. That's the simplicity. Childhood innocence becomes dull in middle age, but marriage is a sad thing for even the stupidest woman. Back home, Tang Jing asked me about my plan. I hugged Ping'er in my arms and said to her, "I'm going to find a first-floor house to evacuate, and Juansheng will give me 500,000 severance pay." Ann is learning how to knit a sweater. She is knitting and listening to us. From the eyes of others, it is still a picture of a happy family, but this family has been torn apart, existing in name only. "Nowadays, five hundred thousand can't buy a good house." "I don't want to ask him for more money." "I understand, is the alimony enough to live on?" "Enough, enough, but Tang Jing, I want to find a job." "What can you do?" she was surprised. "Don't be too contemptuous, everything has a beginning." I was confident. "Stop doing it for three to five months, I have taught you." "It's different now. The days are long, and if you don't go out to kill time, the days feel like years." "Work is not a dinner party, or a time-consuming pastime." "I know." "You don't have any experience at all. You start from scratch. You are used to being a doctor's wife. Can you bear it?" "I'm going to grit my teeth and get on with it." "I have the right to believe you, let's try it." "Tang Jing—" "Stop thanking me, mother-in-law is going to die." "yes." "Finding a house and decorating it is serious. You don't have other skills, Zijun, but when it comes to eating, drinking and having fun, your taste is really very elegant." I said in embarrassment: "There must be some benefits." An'er raised her head, her eyes filled with tears.I held her in my arms too. Tang Jing raised her head and looked into the air with her eyes. It was the first time she was so confused. After a while, she turned her head and said, "Zijun, being a human is really meaningless." I was taken aback by her. But she said immediately: "Tomorrow, tomorrow I will go to see the house, we will do things quickly." I am grateful to Tang Jing, but my family doesn't think so. My mother brought my sister-in-law to see me, and the two bombarded modern women. "Are you really moving out?" the mother asked urgently, "Is there anything to discuss, don't be instigated by others, let me tell you, there is this kind of ring woman who can't see the affection of other people's husband and wife, and changes the way to separate others. You watch out." The sister-in-law inspected the environment coldly, and said darkly: "Such a good home, Zijun, if I were you, I would not be able to leave. It takes ten or eight years to build a home, and it takes three to five years to destroy a home. Days are enough." They don't understand, they always want me to admit that it is Juansheng who wants to sweep my house out, and I have no other way to go... Mom asked threateningly: "This marriage, are you going to leave?" I said yes. The sister-in-law was surprised, "Zijun, you have to think twice. It is one thing to have an affair, but another to get divorced. Men are always like cats who eat fish, and women are mainly patient. You move out? Where did you move the clothes in these three cabinets?" I looked at my sister-in-law and felt that we were people in two worlds. She has her theory and keeps going on: "If you don't leave, he can drive you away. You have money in your hand. You can go shopping in Central today and Tsim Sha Tsui tomorrow. You can do whatever you like. Why do you want to take advantage of him? How many wives are like that?" Living like this, after dragging him for three to five years, he came back and nothing happened, how can you divorce him?" I laughed out of anger, "According to you, the divorce is my fault instead?" "Of course it's your fault." The sister-in-law said bluntly, "You will definitely regret it in the future. Where can you move? He only gave you half a million. You can just find a small apartment on the first floor in the dirty Hongfan district." , if you don’t see a superior person in your life, your life will be over.” I said: "My life is over long ago." Infinitely desolate. "It's early." Sister-in-law sneered, "The tragedy of life is that you will live to be eighty years old. You will get divorced, and so will I. Why don't I leave? Your brother's business has not improved for a hundred years, and I have lived through hardships. I have three daughters, and he thinks I'm not suitable for a man, so why don't I get a divorce?" When the mother heard her scolding her son, her face changed color. The sister-in-law continued, "If you leave in a huff, you can't go to a more indecent place, don't you think?" I didn't say yes, and I didn't say no. Even though we have no communication or affection, we have known each other for nearly twenty years. She has her reasons, and she may not hurt me. Regarding the matter of divorce, most people only have two views. One is to divorce immediately without hesitation, and the other is to never divorce and delay it for a lifetime.The sister-in-law obviously agrees with the latter. Her living environment does not allow her to have other choices, and what she said is just her heartfelt opinion. I take her for this love. I smiled wryly and said, "Everyone's situation is different, I will definitely leave, I have to leave." Mother burst into tears. I said: "Don't cry, I will live up to it, and I will stand up." The sister-in-law sighed, "You almost said 'Eighteen years later, you will be a hero again', Zijun, do you still have eighteen years?" I forced a smile, "Don't make others prestige, destroy your ambition." "I'm not afraid that you will come to visit your relatives and friends," the sister-in-law snorted. "Fortunately, your elder brother is not successful. After supporting his parents and three daughters, he has to gamble with dogs, horses and sand crabs." The sister-in-law said. "I don't know when your elder brother owed you a huge debt. It's a good thing for him not to pity you, and you can't take advantage of him, but I still advise you to think twice." The sister-in-law said. I don't ring. Mother cried louder. Divorce is my own business, relatives and friends are all on the verge of an enemy.Such as bereavement test concubine, really strange, what kind of psychology is this? Juan survived that night. I didn't sleep all night. I thought calmly and humorously: So I can't live without a man all night, and I can't fall asleep without a man by my side. Isn't this the legendary woman? I spread out the newspaper and studied the classified ads for building sales. Mei Foo Sun Chuen, 1,200,000,750,000, well, property prices have fallen. City One Sha Tin.I don't have a license plate and can't live in the "suburbs". Taikoo Shing is facing the sea and faces north...it's too far away, it's inconvenient to see the children. Throwing down my pen, I told myself, war is like this too, as soon as the war is said, the war will come, and the common people will die or be injured, just accept it, resign themselves to fate, and the boat will naturally go straight when it reaches the bridge. The peace and prosperity of my life are gone forever, I fell on the table and wept again, and fell asleep in a daze. When Ping'er called me when he was going to school at dawn, I answered him vaguely, and turned to bed to think for a while. While complaining and pitying herself in the dream, Ah Ping pushed me vigorously, "Madam, Madam, wake up, something happened to An'er." I was scared out of my wits and jumped up, "What happened? Huh? What happened to her?" "The school called and said that she was fighting with her classmates and was crying and making noise in the principal's room. Ma'am, they told you to go right away." "Okay, okay, let me prepare the car." "Madam, the driver and the car have been called 'over there' by the husband." A Ping reported the truth. My heart tingled, "Okay, okay." So realistic. It's his money, his car, how he wants to use it, and who he uses it for. I have nothing to say. I hurriedly changed my clothes, called a streetcar to the school, and the school staff took me to the principal's office. As soon as I entered the door and saw the situation, I couldn't help but froze in fright. It's not An'er, An'er is intact, but another girl.Her hair was disheveled, her school uniform skirt was torn, her face was covered with fingernail scratches, and she was crying with a pair of broken glasses in her hand. An'er, on the other hand, showed no signs of fear, proudly despising the other party. I remembered, isn't this girl Leng Jiaqing, Gu Lingling's daughter? I exclaimed, "How could this be?" The headmaster stood up with a straight face: "Mrs. Shi, when Shi An'er saw Leng Jiaqing on the playground, she went up and beat her up. Leng Jiaqing fell to the ground and she kicked her. We notified the parents of both parties, but Leng Jiaqing fell to the ground and kicked her. My wife failed to go out for filming, we plan to call the police and take Leng Jiaqing for an injury check, what do you have to say?" I stare in bewilderment. An'er came in and out through the gap between her teeth: "Kill her, kill this bitch's family!" The principal waved his hands and shouted unbearably: "Mrs. Shi, if you can't explain this matter, we decide to expel Shi An'er." I said hastily. "Don't call the police, I am willing to send Leng Jiaqing to the hospital, please listen to me and say a few words—" "Of course there is a school worker who will send Leng Jiaqing to the hospital." The headmaster's face was iron, "I don't need you." At this time the school worker came in, and Leng Jiaqing went out with him. Poor, my wrists and knees were all broken. I couldn't bear it, so I turned my head and scolded Ann, "You are crazy, you hit someone!" An'er yelled: "I avenged my mother, but my mother scolded me instead?" For a moment, my turbid air surged up, and I stretched out my hand to "swipe" her across the face.An'er was startled for a moment, then covered her face and wept loudly. The principal stopped her, "Mrs. Shi," she said disgustedly, "you don't usually teach your child, but now you beat her in public. You are not a good mother." After hearing such accusations, I immediately said: "Principal, I have something to say." I turned to An'er and said, "You wait for me outside." An'er went out and closed the door of the principal's room. From beginning to end, I calmly explained the relationship between Gu Lingling's family and us, without missing a single word. "...Principal, I don't mind if you expel An'er, but I hope you understand the pressure she is under, and she can't help herself. I usually believe that the principal also knows that she is a good student, and her grades have always been good." The headmaster's old face gradually relaxed, she didn't know what to say, and replaced it with a long sigh. I stood up, "Let's go first, Principal. I didn't ask for your forgiveness, I just hope for your understanding." She pondered, "Mrs. Shi, Ann can come to class tomorrow." I let go of my heart, "Principal, I think I will handle the school transfer procedures for An'er. Since this happened, I don't want her school life to be shadowed. If the principal is willing to help, please write a letter of recommendation for us. " The principal turned very sympathetic. "Mrs. Shi, I would like to recommend Ann to study in our school's sister school." "Thank you principal." "Ask An'er to come to class tomorrow, and tell her that I won't see Leng Jiaqing, and that Leng Jiaqing will have at least three days off." "Yes, principal, about Ann...I will explain to her that all of this...isn't anyone's fault." The principal sighed again, his face full of sympathy. I said, "I'm leaving." An'er was sitting at the door of the principal's office, and I touched her face in pain. She said, "Mom, I have caused you so much trouble." I murmured: "Don't be afraid, Ann, we are not afraid, we are very strong, we can handle everything." "Mom, how did you become so brave?" She looked up. I smiled wryly, "Mom hit you, did it hurt?" She smiled, "It doesn't hurt." When I got home, I exhausted myself and explained to An'er that it had nothing to do with Leng Jiaqing. An'er seemed to understand a little bit. It's hard for a child at her age to half-understand everything. In the evening, Shi Juansheng's phone call came. I know why he came to me.That woman must have vomited all her bitterness. After picking up the phone, I coldly pre-empted: "Yes, our daughter beat her daughter. Shi Juansheng, listen: Shi An'er's surname is Shi, and she has half your blood. Leng Jiaqing has nothing to do with you, you If you say something that doesn't please my ears, I took the two children and disappeared without a trace, so don't use excuses to commit murder!" He was speechless for a long while. "Should I call the police? Report it, you dare her to arrest your daughter and put her in jail!" "..." An'er leaned her head on my shoulder, her eyes full of gratitude. Juan Sheng finally sighed over there, "You know that the children of the Leng family are also innocent." I said, "No matter how innocent she is, it's not your turn to speak for her. You caused everything. An'er has to change schools because of this." "I also know that An'er feels uncomfortable—" "You don't want this family anymore, we are good, you don't need to praise us, and we don't need you to sigh when we are degraded." "The child is still my child." He said, "You tell Ann, I will come and see her tomorrow." He hung up the phone. My heart is heavy. At this time, Ping'er came out with the comic book and said excitedly: "Mom, mom, I discovered a new continent." I forced a smile on my face, "Really, tell me quickly, what you found." "Mom, Q Taro and Ding Dong were drawn by the same person." He said solemnly. I acted in admiration, "Oh, really, what a meticulous observation." Tears rolled down my stomach, "Which one do you like?" "I like Ding Dong now, and I also liked Q Taro before." Ping'er said shaking his head. I was shocked, "Why, why you don't like Q Taro anymore." Ping'er scratched his head and thought for a long time, "I don't know." I asked, "Are you tired of watching it?" "Yes," Ping'er suddenly realized, "I'm tired of watching it." I sighed, "Ping'er, An'er, mother needs to be quiet for a while." I went into the room and closed myself for a long time. In the afternoon, I went out with Tang Jing to find a house.We entrusted the agency to do it, and it didn't take too much effort. Each floor of the small apartment has the same shape, six to seven hundred feet, and the small rooms are easy to get through. The bathroom faces the living room, and the kitchen is only big enough for one person to turn around. I don't mind a small place, the smaller the better, living alone in such a big place, the empty valley echoes, how scary. I couldn't help but tell Tang Jing what happened in the morning. Tang Pin said that I dealt with it very well. I complained profusely, but Tang Jing interrupted me—"It's been more than ten minutes." "What? I do not understand. "You are only allowed to complain for ten minutes a day," she laughed. "You can't indulge in the ocean of pain as a kind of enjoyment. My friend's ears have limited endurance, please forgive me." I was speechless immediately, full of grievances, and stared at her stupidly. Tang Jing said softly: "There are as many unfortunate people as there are in the world. You are not a member of privilege. If you don't believe me, I recommend you to buy the book and have a look." I lowered my head, pondering her words. "——This room is in a good direction," she turned her head and said to the agent, "Just tell the owner: We don't want the decoration, and see if he is willing to reduce it by ten or twenty thousand." The broker is submissive. Tang Jing asked me, "Not bad, isn't it? Let Shi Juansheng pay for it." "What price?" I asked. "520,000. Sixteen years," said the agent. I smiled wryly, "That's enough, I'll be dead by then." "Don't worry, I won't die." Tang Jing sat on the floor of the empty room with her legs crossed. Under the sun, her face had a crystal radiance, so happy, so natural, and her eyes were three points stubborn, three points mocking, three points beautiful, and one point provocative.She never gives up and fights to the end. I felt ashamed and clenched my fists.What about my strength, what about my spirit. The agent said: "Miss Tang, if you like it, please put a small deposit." Tang Jing signed out the check, everything was her idea, and I obeyed. She said, "The location is not close, but the price is cheap. Forget it." She left the apartment on my shoulder. I didn't thank her either, we parted at the door and went home. Ziqun knew the location of my new house, so he immediately expressed his opinion. "Why do you live in Mei Foo? What's the best thing to do? Go downstairs to eat wonton noodles in pajamas or something? Let me tell you, when a man hears that you live in a place like that, he thinks it's too far away, and he won't even drop it off. Whose bad idea is this? ? Eighty percent of it is Tang Jing, isn't it?" I asked coldly, "According to you, what should I do?" "Since Shi Juansheng gave you 500,000 yuan, you can use it to rent a house to live in, dress yourself up beautifully, and then catch big golden turtles. Then you will have no worries about clothing and food." "Really?" I looked at her, "What about you, why didn't you catch it? You are younger than me, and your conditions are better than mine." She was speechless, and closed her mouth uninterestedly. Ziqun lives in another village and rents a back room of an old house. She is very angry with the second landlord and is not allowed to turn on a door light at night, but she is willing to give her salary for a Japanese sports car to speed along the street. ，充大头鬼，人各有志，闲时告诉那些牛鬼蛇神：“我住在又一村。” 这次走出来，我还打着有男人追的主意不成？只要活下来、活得健康，已是我最大的宗旨。 五十万有多少？如果没有进帐，不用很奢侈，花一年也就光光的，以后我还活不活下去？ 子群的意见简直可以置之不理。 第二天见到涓生，我毫不客气，摊大手板问他要钱。 他问：“你找到房子了？” “五十二万，请付现金支票。” “子君——”他有点为难。 他犹疑了。 他会犹疑吗？ “安儿打人的事……” “我已经教训过她，她被我掌嘴，还不够吗？” “我想我还是把她送到外国去好。”涓生忽然说。 “什么？才十二岁就送外国？”我愕然，“她又是女孩子，怎么放心？” “怕什么，大不了做小洋人，”涓生笑，“现在流行到外国，你问问她。” “你是要遣走她，是不是？”我责问。 “你别多心，子君，去不去由安儿自己，她也并不是儿童了。” “事情一宗管一宗，我那屋价，你先给我再说。” “子君，我只能给你三十万。”他忽然说。 "what?" “子君，我算过了，我最近很紧，只能付你三十万，其余一二十万，分期付款，你先向银行贷款，以后我设法还你。” 我倒抽一口冷气，“我拿什么钱来作分期付款？” “我每个月还会付你五千块。” “五千块？那不是我的生活费用吗？” “你最好省一点。或是……找工作做。” 我说：“如今的利息那么高，史涓生，你说过会安置我的。” 涓生脸上出现厌恶的神情，我知道他在想什么，他在想：这女人，我豢养她十多年，她眼中只有钱，现在与我讨价还价，像在街市买菜一样。 我沉默了，一颗心在滴血。 “……你还有点首饰……”他说。 他声音是这样的陌生。what am i doing向一个陌生人要钱，并且尚嫌少，子君呵子君，你怎么好意思。我根本不记得什么时候认识过面前这个男人，我至爱的丈夫史涓生已死，我似已死。 我听见我自己说：“好，三十万就三十万，余数我自己设法。” 他见这么爽快顺利，连忙掏出支票簿，立刻开出张支票。 我麻木地接过。 “我也许还要送平儿安儿出去读书，都是费用哪。” 我别转头，没有回答，没有落泪，史涓生站起来走了。 唐晶说得对，我并不是世上最不幸的，世上亦有很多女人，怀着破碎的心，如常地活着，我的当务之急是要把青山留着。 那夜我拥着平儿睡。 唐品为这件事诧异。她并没有批评史涓生。但是她说：“我知道有人趁妻子怀孕时遗弃她。” 后来我们在律师楼处签屋契，余款交银行分期，分十年给，每个月四千六百。 我得找一份工作，养活自己。我能做什么呢。 唐晶说：“首先，我要替你伪造一份履历表，没有人会聘用一个坐在客厅中的太太。第二，请你记住，只要肯学肯做，你总挨得下去，打工并不需要天才。” 我只觉背后凉飕飕的，说不出彷徨。 唐晶微笑说：“谁生就的劳碌命？这世界像一个大马戏班子，班主名叫'生活'，拿着皮鞭站在咱们背后使劲地抽打，逼咱们跳火圈、上刀山，你敢不去吗？皮鞭子响了，狠着劲咬紧牙关，也就上了。” 我默默听着。这话虽然滑稽，但血泪交替。 唐晶伸出手，“欢迎你加入我们的行列。” 我忽然开口：“唐晶，就仿佛数天之前，我与你一起午饭，那时候我心中才跟自己说，高薪？一万块一个月又如何？叫我天天早上七点挤到中环，就算拣了钱就可以马上走，我也懒得起床。你说，唐晶，这是不是折堕？”说罢我竟然忍不住，仰面哈哈地笑起来。 轮到唐晶不出声。 我解嘲地说：“唐晶，子群说得对，没有一生一世的事，我的福气满了。” 找工作这一关最难过，我不能事事靠唐晶。摊开南华早报聘请栏，我简直不相信自己的眼睛，薪水这么低，堂堂大学生才三千多底薪，虽然说机会好有前景，升得快，但从底层到升职，简直是一篇血泪史，我还没开始，心底已经慌了。