Chapter 16 16. The Great Madonna

Don't accept offers from strange strangers who offer to give you a ride— And remember, all men are strange strangers. —Robin Morgan Give me a pair of high heels and I can conquer the world. - Madonna Back to Shanghai.Everything develops according to a certain disordered and predetermined track. I feel like I've lost weight.The juice of the body turned into ink and gurgled into the tip of the pen, flowing to every word in the novel. Little Sichuan's takeaway was delivered on time, and it was delivered by the boy named Xiaoding.When I am in a good mood, I will lend him some books to read. Once he took a small article published in the "Voice" column of the migrant workers' page of "Xinmin Evening News". I read it again and was surprised to find that his Well written and very thoughtful.He told me shyly that his ideal is to write a book.Kundera predicted that in the 21st century, everyone can become a writer, as long as they pick up a pen and speak their own words.The desire to confide is the spiritual need of everyone as a living person.

I write all night in my pajamas with disheveled hair, and wake up from my desk in the morning with purple ink marks on my forehead, looking around, empty, absent every day, and the phone never rings (I always unplug the phone line and forget to plug it back in) , I went to bed, lay down and continued to sleep. One day at about ten o'clock in the evening, I was suddenly awakened by a knock on the door.I patted my chest, thankful that the knock on the door saved me in time from the nightmare just now. I dreamed that I got on an old-fashioned steam train made of iron every day, and strangers filled the long strips on both sides of the carriage. I watched the train move slowly against my face, and a man in military uniform and helmet jumped on the train. I hesitated for a second, and the train roared past.I cried in despair and hated myself, just because I read the wrong watch, or mistook the time of another train for this train, and I didn't rush into the train at the last moment. Maybe I was timid, and this dream seems to imply See me and Tiantian are two passing trains.

I opened the door wearily, and outside the door was a black Madonna smoking a cigarette. Wearing black made her look particularly slender and slender. My thoughts were still stuck in the dream just now, and I didn't notice the unusual expression on her face.She seemed to have been drunk and heavily perfumed with opium, her hair tied high on her head like an ancient woman's, and her eyes gleamed like shards of glass.There is an unpleasant smell. "God, have you been in this room all this time? Still writing?" She took a few steps around the room. "I just woke up and had a nightmare. By the way, have you eaten dinner?" I suddenly remembered that I hadn't eaten three meals a day.

"Okay, let's go out and have a good meal, I'll treat you," she snuffed out the cigarette butt, threw the coat to me, and sat on the sofa waiting for me to pack up and go out. Her white Santana 2000 was parked by the side of the road downstairs.She opened the door, started the engine, and I sat next to her, buckled up, and the car kicked off quickly.The car windows are all wide open, smoking in the strong wind is a pleasant thing, there is an illusion that all the worries are swept away by the wind. Madonna drove the car onto the viaduct. Since more and more viaducts appeared in the city, a group of racing lunatics also appeared on the viaduct.There is a love song by Zhang Xinzhe in the tape box, "Have you got another him? Tell me, don't be afraid of me being sad." I realized that her expression was different at this time, and I suddenly recalled the time I met in Goya. Ah Dick and Vermilion, I got it right.

Madonna has always been an unpredictable woman. There are too many improvisations, randomness and complexity in her life. I have always lacked a clear guessing ability about her past, present and future. I don't know if she and Ah Dick are playing for real, because she has heard from her tone that she has had many little boyfriends like Ah Dick.According to this reasoning, Ah Dick should not be the last tender dessert in her life journey. "What do you want to eat? Chinese food, Western food, or Japanese food?" "Anything." I said. "That's really irresponsible. I hate when people keep saying 'whatever, whatever', you'd better think about it and choose one."

"Japanese food." I said.The culture of this city has a serious pro-Japanese tendency. The songs of Naemi Amuro, the books of Haruki Murakami, the TV of Takuya Kimura, countless Japanese cartoons, and Nissan electric appliances are all loved by people from the bottom of their hearts.I, on the other hand, don't dislike clean and elegant Japanese food and Japanese cosmetics.The car stops at Donghu Road, Daedo Japanese Cuisine. The lights poured on the floor tiles like amber liquid, and waiters dressed like puppets walked through the hall neatly and orderly.Egg custard, tuna sushi, cold cucumber, seaweed and dried shrimp soup are served one by one.

"You know what? I broke up with Dick," she said to me. "Really?" I looked at her, her face was gloomy. "Why?" I really don't know the reason.But I don't want to say that I have seen Zhu Sha and Ah Dick together in goya. Zhu Sha is my cousin and Madonna is my friend. I can only look at it as objectively as possible. "Are you still in the dark?——It was your cousin, your cinnabar cousin who took my man." She snorted and drank the sake. "Oh, is it possible that Dick took the initiative to show love to my cousin?" I said calmly.Because cinnabar is an out-and-out lady in my mind. In the morning, she wears moderate makeup and takes an air-conditioned bus or taxi to the office. Walking on catwalks past Huaihai Road, Maison Department Store quietly displays the world's top brand-name shop windows, gets off the elevator at the intersection of Changshu and takes the subway, among the women who have a touch of tiredness and satisfaction on their faces after applying make-up, is There is cinnabar one.And because of the presence of many women like Zhu Sha, this city has become a city full of brilliance, elegance and introverted temperament in the glitz and publicity. The blurred boudoir resentment in Zhang Ailing's works and the exquisite sadness in Chen Danyan's works all happened. Here, some people call Shanghai "the city of women", which may be compared to those northern cities with masculinity.

"I thought I was sure about Dick. I could guess what he was thinking, but I still didn't expect him to lose interest in me so soon. Although I have a lot of money, is my face ugly? "She smiled and grabbed my hand, turning her face up slightly under the light. What I saw was a face that couldn't be described as beautiful, but it was unforgettable. It had a pointed face, eyebrows and eyes that slanted, pale skin with slightly enlarged pores, and expensive lipstick that was thick enough to drip. It used to be beautiful, but now the willows are dark, the clouds are gone, and the falling flowers are falling into dreams, and they are affected by some corrosive joy, arrogance, and dreams. The facial features become sharp and tired, can hurt others and be easily hurt by others.

She smiles, her eyes are red and wet, she herself is like a history of a woman's life, a specimen, carrying a unique position, value, and instinct of a woman. "Do you really care about Dick?" I asked. "I don't know... I'm always unwilling. He dumped me... I feel tired, and I don't want to find a man anymore. Probably no little boy is really interested in me." She seemed to be drinking water Drinking the same sake, his face gradually turned red, like a sunflower painted by Van Gogh before his death.When I was not prepared, she suddenly raised her hand and threw a wine glass on the ground, and there were pieces of white jade on the ground.

The waiter hurried over, "I'm sorry, I was careless." I said quickly. "To be honest, you are really happy. You have Tiantian and Mark. Isn't it? It's very complete. If you can be born as a woman, you are happy." She continued to grab my hand, and my palm suddenly A cold sweat broke out. "What Mark?" I tried to stay calm.At this time, a waiter who looked like a middle school student was watching us with his eyes, and two young women who were talking about their private lives were always eye-catching. "Don't pretend, what can escape my eyes, my eyes are very poisonous. I still have an intuition, and being a mommy in the south for several years is not for nothing." She laughed, "Don't worry, I I won’t tell Tian Tian that it will kill him. He’s too innocent and fragile...and there’s nothing wrong with you, I can understand you.” I put my head in my hands, and the mild Japanese wine seemed to have an effect on me , I started to feel dizzy, and I was about to fly. "I'm drunk." I said.

"Go get your face done. It's next door." She paid the bill, took my hand, walked out of the restaurant, and pushed open the door of the beauty salon next door. The beauty salon is not big, and there are some real and fake paintings on the walls around it. It is said that the owner of the beauty salon is very artistic. From time to time, men will push the door in, not to see the women on the beauty bed, but to buy On the wall is an authentic painting by Lin Fengmian. A touch of music, a touch of fruity fragrance, a touch of the lady's face. Madonna and I lay on the adjacent small bed, with two slices of cucumber coolly placed over our eyes, we couldn't see anything.The gentle woman's fingers scratched my face like a fish.The music lulls people to sleep. Madonna said that she often sleeps while having her face done in the beauty salon. Such an atmosphere belongs to a kind of tacit understanding between women.The feeling of being caressed by a pair of jade hands may be several times better than the thoughtfulness of a man.There is something resembling Lesbian culture in the exquisite beauty parlor.I don't know which bed someone is tattooing their eyes, and they can hear the slight sizzling sound of metal being scratched in the flesh.Kind of creepy.Then I relaxed and drifted off to sleep with the lovely mood of waking up looking like Elizabeth Taylor. The white Santana car continued to drive fast on the lonely viaduct at night, we listened to the radio and smoked, there was an atmosphere as quiet as water. "I don't want to go back to my home. It's too quiet. It's like a tomb without a man. Can I go to your home?" she asked. I nodded and said yes. She stayed in the bathroom for a long time, and I called the hotel where Tiantian lived. Tiantian’s voice sounded sleepy (he was always sleepy on the phone), like a familiar air passing through a long telephone wire. Into my ear, "Are you already asleep? Then I'll call you later." I said. "Oh, no, it's okay...I feel very comfortable, as if I had a dream, dreaming of you, and the sound of birds singing, oh, I want to eat your borscht...Is it cold in Shanghai?" He sniffed Yu, seems to have a cold. "Fortunately, Madonna is staying with me tonight. She is in a bad mood. Ah Dick and Zhu Sha have become a couple... Are you and the thread ball healthy?" "The ball of thread is diarrhea. I took it to the hospital for an injection and took some medicine. I have a little cold. It's just like this after swimming in the sea, but it's okay. I finished watching Hitchcock's "Countdown" , I think the style is like some martial arts books of Gu Long, by the way, I want to tell you something I saw with my own eyes, just yesterday when I was sitting on a bus, I met a little hooligan who looked very At the age of four or five, he snatched the gold necklace from a middle-aged woman next to me in public, and no one stopped him, so he got out of the car and disappeared without a trace.” "It's scary, you have to be careful, I miss you so much." "Me too, it's nice to miss someone, too." "When are you coming back?" "After reading these books and drawing some sketches, the people here are different from those in Shanghai, and I feel like somewhere in Southeast Asia." "Okay, give me a kiss." There was a lot of lip smacking on the phone, and finally both sides hung up the phone while counting 1, 2, and 3. Madonna called me in the bathroom, "Give me a bathrobe, honey." I opened the closet and took out a cotton robe from Tiantian, she had opened the bathroom door and was drying herself in the smoke . I threw the bathrobe over, and she made a Monroe-style provocative gesture, "What do you think of my figure? Is it still attractive?" I crossed my arms, looked up and down, and turned her back again, She turned obediently, then turned around again. "How?" She stared at me enthusiastically. "Honestly?" I asked. "certainly." "There are many men's marks, at least, there are 100." "What do you mean?" She still didn't put on her bathrobe. "The breasts are nice, although not big enough, but they flow delicately to the palms, the legs are beautiful, and the neck is the most beautiful part of your body, only a lady of high society in the West would have such a beautiful neck, but this body is tired and retains too much Multiple heterosexual memories." She has been pinching her breasts, full of pity and treasure, and following my words, she strokes her long legs downwards and touches her long and slender neck upwards. "I love myself, the more I love myself the more I get tired and older... Don't you like it?" I walk away from her, the way she touches herself is unbearable, both men and women react. "It's more comfortable than my home!" she yelled after me. She wanted to talk to me, and we slept in the same bed, under the duvet, legs touching legs.The lamp was turned dimly, and the wardrobe and window could be seen over her nose.When I was studying in Fudan, the girls in the same room had the habit of sharing the same bed. The best place for women to share each other's secrets, joys, desires, shame, and dreams is probably to share a bed.There is a strange friendship, an intuitive trust, and subconscious anxieties that men can't understand.She talked about her past, and in exchange, I also contributed my own past, of course not as colorful as hers. Her life is more like a line of cursive calligraphy after drunkenness, while mine is a line of round characters. Pain, anxiety, happiness, and pressure do not make me look weirder, I am still a round and lovely girl, At least in the eyes of some men. Madonna was born in a shantytown in Zhabei District, Shanghai. Her ideal since she was a child was to be an artist (as a result, she found many artist lovers), but she played truant at the age of 16.Her father and an older brother, both heavy drinkers, would target her and beat her up when they were drunk, and gradually the violence became sexual, kicking her ass and throwing cigarette butts at her chest.Her mother was weak and incapable of protecting her. One day she got on the train and came to Guangzhou alone.She had no choice but to work as a hostess in a bar. At that time, the southern city was in an unprecedented wave of development. There were many rich people, and the money of the rich was staggering.She has the unique intelligence of a Shanghai girl, and her demeanor is superior to other women from other provinces. The guests all like her, hold her in their arms, and are willing to do things for her.Her status in the circle has risen sharply, and her subordinates have also started to recruit some girls to start their own business. At that time, her nickname was "Yangnannan", a Shanghainese nickname for a fair and beautiful girl.She wears a long black dress with thin shoulder straps, a diamond ring given by an admirer in her hand, and her black hair hangs over her pale face. Weaving together supreme power. "The scenes of life during that time look back like a lifetime, and can be summed up with a simple title, "Beauty and the Beast", and I just mastered the rules of taming men, maybe when I grow old, I will also write one. This book is specially for women, teaching them how to correctly grasp the psychology of men, and what their inferiority is, just like hitting a snake with seven inches. Men also have the weakest acupuncture points. Although the little girls nowadays are precocious, they can Stronger and braver than we were back then, but women still suffer in many places." She moved the pillow to a more comfortable position and looked at me, "Isn't it?" I said, "In the final analysis, the existing cultural system of society belittles the need for women to clearly understand their own value. Strong girls are ridiculed as 'rude', and soft girls are regarded as 'brainless hollow vases'." .” "In short, girls have to perfect their minds, there is nothing wrong with being smart." She stopped and asked me if I agreed, and I said yes, although I didn't want to call myself a feminist fighter, but she was absolutely right .It made me discover the deep thought hidden in her mind. "Then how did you marry...marry your deceased husband?" "An incident happened, which educated me and made me understand that no matter how powerful I was in that circle, I was just a perishable girl... At that time, I especially liked a new girl from Chengdu, she was A college student managed by Sichuan University, who has read a lot of books and can talk about art and other topics with me, (sorry, although I am very vulgar, I always have a childish affection for the word art, and one of my boyfriends at that time was also A painter who graduated from the Guangzhou Academy of Fine Arts and painted surrealist oil paintings like Ah Dick), the girl had no place to live for the time being, so I asked her to live with me. Just one evening, three fierce men suddenly came to my door She. It turned out that she was from the same town as them. At that time, they raised money and gave it to this girl to speculate in futures in Guangzhou. As a result, 100,000 yuan was fried overnight. She kept hiding from her fellow countrymen and did not report the news. In the end, these men came to the door with knives. I was taking a shower in the bathroom, and they found me and took me away. It was a horrible situation. My room was turned over It was a mess, jewelry and 30,000 cash were taken away. I said it has nothing to do with me, let me go, they put a cloth in my mouth. I think they want to sell me and girls to transnational human traffickers and send them to Thailand , Malaysia and the like.” "We were locked in a dark room, my mind was dead, hopeless, and there was an ominous atmosphere around me, thinking that a few hours ago I was still living a life of luxury, but now I am reduced to one Meat for the slaughter, what is my life. They come, beat the girl, call her a real whore, and then take the cloth out of my mouth, I am determined to take this opportunity to ignore I wanted to save my own life, so I listed a long list of black and white people, from the head of the police station to the gangsters on every street. They hesitated for a while, and went outside the door to discuss for a long time , there seemed to be a dispute, and then a taller man walked in and said, 'So you are a famous foreign girl, this is a misunderstanding, we will send you back immediately.'" Her hand held mine coldly, and her fingers trembled slightly as the narrative unfolded. "So you chose to marry?" "Yeah, quit the arena." She said, "At that time, there was an old man who became a multi-millionaire in real estate and wanted to marry me. He finally overcame the nausea of ​​sleeping with a wrinkled mummy. I married him anyway. I guessed that he wouldn’t live long, but it turned out that my intuition was right... Now that I have money and freedom, I’m happier than most women, and although I’m bored to the core, I’m still better than the laid-off female workers in a textile factory.” "Our neighbor's housewife has also been laid off, but it's not necessarily so miserable. She still cooked hot dishes and hot meals to wait for her husband and the children to come back. The family of three sat around the table and had a happy dinner. God is fair and gave you this. Will take something else from you, so I sometimes understand the meaning of happiness in the lives of neighbors." "Okay, even if what you said is reasonable, go to sleep." Holding my shoulders, my breath gradually became thicker, and I fell asleep drowsily. I can't sleep well, she and her stories are like a light source that keeps sending stimulating light into my brain, twelve colors flash alternately, especially this body is still close to me, I can feel her The temperature, her breathing, her sorrows and her dreams.She exists on the edge of the believable and the unbelievable, on the edge of fire and ice, and she is both breathtakingly sexy (I feel it more clearly as a woman) and terrifyingly dead (she has a rare experience and nervousness, will lose control anytime and anywhere, and will hurt people like a knife). I tried to break her hands away, and I could only fall asleep if I stayed away from her.But she held me tighter, and with a dreamy moan, she kissed my face passionately, her lips wet and dangerous like a hungry clam.But I'm not Dick, or any other man in her life.I pushed her away desperately, but she still didn't wake up.In the dim night, she wrapped around my body tightly like ivy, and I was hot and panicked. Then she woke up suddenly, opened her eyes, her eyelashes were wet, "Why are you hugging me?" She asked me in a low voice, but she could still see that she was very happy. "You hugged me first." I defended in a low voice, "Oh," she sighed, "I was dreaming, dreaming about Dick...Maybe I really fell in love with this kid, I'm so lonely." She said, got up and got out of bed, tidied her hair and Tiantian's bathrobe, "Go to sleep next door," she suddenly laughed when she walked out the door, her face was full of strange expressions, she turned and asked me, "Do you like me?" holding you like just now?" "God!" I made a face on the big flower board. "I think I like you quite a bit, really, we can do better, maybe it's because our zodiac signs match." She gestured to stop me from speaking, "I mean, I might be able to do your beautiful novel Broker."