Chapter 16 Chapter Fourteen

Cheng Ji stood on the balcony, looking at the street lights in the community, he lit a cigarette.As an excellent doctor, he rarely smoked or drank alcohol.He turned his head and looked at everything he was proud of, his academics, his major, his house, his car, his future, and his wife.He seems to be a very successful man already, aside from having no children, which he doesn't want right now.Everything was so perfect, but his wife insisted on divorce after getting drunk. Why is she dissatisfied with such a good life? What makes her dissatisfied?As far as Cheng Ji knew, Yu Ying was not a woman with high material requirements, and she was already living a very good life in this city.So, what exactly is she dissatisfied with?Is it really love?

His eyes were like a slow motion movie, repeating the sentence that Yu Ying raised her head and asked herself over and over again: "Cheng Ji, do you love me?" Really, after all these years of marriage, Cheng Ji has never thought about this issue.He always thought that because he married her, he and her must be in love.The prerequisite for marriage is love!He believed in the premise.But, calm down and think about it, how much love is it?Does his kindness to her really only include responsibility and etiquette? Cheng Ji has always believed that Yu Ying is someone who can live well with him and each other.She is the kind of woman who is very suitable for marriage. She is clean and keeps the house in order. She is smart and never needs him to worry too much. work, but also understand the meaning of work.Under the wisdom of this woman, home is like a well-driven car, running on the bright road.How many people envy him, not only because of his future, but also because he has a generous, decent, smart and beautiful wife.So he is also very satisfied.

However, he really doesn't know if he loves Yu Ying or not, because in his world, love is already a very hypocritical thing, and this kind of thing is full of toxins, making life unsettled and making people lose their minds , Manipulating people's emotions is not conducive to people's self-maturation. Love, what is love?The kind of boys and girls looking at each other and laughing, the recklessness on TV, the bizarre love stories in novels?What is love?Why did Yu Ying give up such a beautiful life because she couldn't feel love?Could it be that these are not as good as love?

Cheng Ji began to be in a trance, the unnecessary things he disdained were so important in her heart. When Lu Jie came home, as soon as he opened the elevator, he saw Ran Ran squatting at the door of the room.She is wearing a beautiful dress, which is freezing in this cold winter.She put her arms around her shoulders at the door, and when she saw Lu Jie coming, her eyes lit up, and she ran towards Lu Jie's arms with a smile. Lu Jie calmly and slowly pushed her away.Ran Ran became unhappy: "I've been waiting for you for a long time." "How do you know I'm back?"

"You left and didn't turn on your phone, and I couldn't contact you, so I had to go to the bar you frequent and wait for you every day." Ran Ran said pitifully.Although the big eyes were painted with deep eye shadow, they still shone brightly. If it was the old Lu Jie, he might have nodded expressionlessly.At that time, he only thought that this woman was really annoying, and he couldn't get rid of her no matter what.But at this time, he felt that it was another Ran Ran who was hopelessly in love with someone who would not respond.Lu Jie softened his heart, opened the door and let her in.

Ran Ran was overjoyed, thinking that Lu Jie had changed his mind, and as soon as he entered the door, he slid into Lu Jie's arms like a fish.She exhaled and said to Lu Jie: "I thought you didn't want me anymore. I saw you leaving with another woman, so I thought you had a new love." "Did you see it? What did you see?" Lu Jie pushed Ran Ran away and asked.He didn't care, but he didn't want to affect Yu Ying.He really didn't want to let Ran Ran trouble Yu Ying again at this time. "I didn't see it clearly. It feels very familiar. I can't remember who it is at once." After being pushed away, Ran Ran didn't take it seriously, and jumped on the sofa with her legs tucked in, looking at Lu Jie with joy.

Lu Jie decided to make it clear to Ran Ran that he really didn't love Ran Ran. Most of the time when he got along with Ran Ran, Ran Ran was alone in love with himself, and it really had nothing to do with him.He knew he was an asshole, but if he didn't make it clear, he would continue to be an asshole. Lu Jie could only say: "Ran Ran, listen to me carefully." Sure enough, Ran Ran put away her smiling face and sat up, but couldn't hold back her excitement: "Say it! I'll listen to whatever you say." "Ran Ran, I don't love you." Ran Ran froze for a moment, then continued to raise her head and smile: "Well, I know, but you will always fall in love with me."

"Ran Ran, love really doesn't depend on hard work." "I will work harder, be more beautiful, and be more famous." Tears had already appeared in Ran Ran's eyes, and she desperately endured them. "It's not your problem, Ran Ran. I'm sorry, I really don't love, I can't lie to you." Ran Ran held back her tears and looked at the man opposite, the man she really fell in love with for the first time, the man who made her feel the pain of love along the way.She asked: "Lu Jie, what's wrong with me, I just change it, why are you so decisive? Maybe, if we get along again, you will like me, why don't you give me a chance? Give yourself a chance Opportunity!"

Lu Jie smiled wryly.Look, she is just a child, thinking that love is a draft, love is an opportunity, as long as you work hard and get along.However, love is much more complicated than the draft. If he could choose, Lu Jie would also like to love Ran Ran, so that there would be less pain. Lu Jie shook his head: "Ran Ran, you are a good girl, you are beautiful, young, and capable, and in a few days, you will shine. You will meet many good men in your life, don't be too obsessed with which one Whether a man loves you or not, your life should not be just like this!" A pillow flew over, and there was a scream in my ear.

"You said so much, you just want to get rid of me, you just want me to stop annoying you." Ran Ran completely broke down when she heard this, and threw the pillow casually, "Why? Why? Lu Jie, Why? Why don't you love me? What's wrong with me, what am I going to do, what do you want me to do? Lu Jie, don't do this, really, loving me is not as difficult as you think..." Ran Ran burst into tears Even if a heart humbles itself to the ground, it will not bloom the flowers of love. She burst into tears, swept everything she could see to the ground, and vented frantically.Ran Ran finally realized that Lu Jie really didn't love her, he didn't love her before, he doesn't love her now, and it's impossible to fall in love with her in the future.She really can't get this person's love, which is something she can't do even if she kills and sets fire.

Ran Ran cried and sat on the ground, Lu Jie's heart ached, but he felt envious.What a beautiful youth, you can sit on the ground and cry if you don't love, but he can only smile and bless.In this respect, the world is cruel to men. Lu Jie went over to pat Ran Ran on the shoulder, and Ran Ran hugged Lu Jie's waist and sobbed and asked, "Are you in love with someone else? You must be in love with someone else." Lu Jie could only keep silent, he couldn't communicate with Ran Ran anymore.Love is not what she thinks, you have to fall in love with someone else to not love her.He didn't love Ran Ran from the beginning to the end, what he thought he liked before was just a temporary novelty.He was originally a prodigal son, but suddenly he felt that he had found the woman he had been looking for, and only then did he really calm down and understand the absurdity of the past.If he could understand himself and understand himself earlier, he would not be so dissolute in his previous life and would not hurt these girls.But in any case, anything can be given, but love is never used to compensate.Not loving is not loving, there is no reason, no way to work hard, no method.There is no way to treat a man who doesn't love you. Ran Ran was tired from crying, stood up, and stayed in the bathroom for a long time, her eyes were red and swollen when she came out.Her makeup was obviously applied on her face, as if she hadn't seen the mess in the room, she strode forward with her head held high.When going out, he turned around and said to Lu Jie: "I hate you, I will never forgive you, I will always hate you." The woman who walked out was no longer full of love.She threw herself into this house innocently and ignorantly, but the things in the house, her heart, and the love held in her palm all turned into rubbish, and no one took her in. The only thing she could keep was It is that pride. Women are frustrated and grow up like this.The problem is that some people really grow up, such as Pan Yijia, as long as there is an accident, she can mature; while some people are always pursuing, such as Yu Ying, even if her wings are broken, she still insists on taking off, fluttering To my own love.Everyone is so different, like plants living in various places, looking at each other from afar, but never knowing. Can you expect a sunflower to understand the sad heart of moss? Wu Borong asked Yu Ying to go to the Guanshan Pavilion on the top of the mountain, where they sat together during morning exercises.However, after making an appointment at that place on this winter night, and calling so urgently, Yu Ying knew that it was time to say goodbye.He and her always say goodbye again and again, as if there are many exercises, but when it is time to separate, all the exercises are useless, there is no effect at all, she still feels powerless, like a battle Like a serious illness. In the future, she will only have herself, and she will never meet him again. Drive to the parking lot at the top of the mountain, and walk tens of meters to the small wooden pavilion.The city is like a huge dead sea, and the lights below are like the phosphorus fire released by the rotting fish carcasses.Yu Ying walked very slowly, looking at a person sitting in a corner of the pavilion, she couldn't see clearly, but she saw the flickering fire. He has been smoking here and waiting for her!Yu Ying quickened her pace, and suddenly she felt a pang of sadness, which was similar to the sadness of love, and that kind of sadness filled her heart, and there was a kind of pungentness in the air, similar to that of chopping onions, which instantly filled her eyes with tears.The way forward was lost, only the firelight was guiding her, and that was the only light and warmth she could find in the darkness. In this piece of Dead Sea, no one actually cares about her life, everyone is living their own life.She only has herself, and her seemingly happy life.But these are not what she wants. At this time, she just wants to hold the person in front of her, run away, take Xiaobao, and run to the ends of the earth, where no one can find her. The thought flashed by and was immediately suppressed.Her happiness is to rob someone else's husband, rob someone else's child, rob someone else's father, and then she will be happy? She can't do this kind of plunder.It's not the pressure the world puts on her, it's her conscience.She loves it, she hates it, it's okay, but it must not be done in this way.Even if love can make her collapse, Xiaobao can make her crazy, but she will still know what the bottom line is. Therefore, Yu Ying who entered the pavilion, in Wu Borong's eyes, looked like a dummy, without all the emotions and desires.When Wu Borong heard the news of Pan Yijia's pregnancy, his first reaction was that Yu Ying was going to leave him. This is a kind of intuition, he fell in love with her because he understood her, so if he can't guess her decision, then that love can only be reduced to a meat war. Wu Borong admitted that when he was with Yu Ying, he didn't have too much hope and didn't pay too much love.But under his influence, Yu Ying slowly shone like a beautiful jade.That was not what he gave Yu Ying. Yu Ying understood her body sexually and liberated her mind emotionally. When Wu Borong knew that he fell in love with her, he was flustered and helpless.He also once thought that he would never have that kind of feeling again, that kind of feeling disappeared in the adult world for too long, so long that he wondered if such a thing really existed, and when it came, he would think it was fake.Sometimes, they don't doubt love, they just doubt themselves, doubt whether that hypocritical self can really produce a love, do they have this ability? But anyway, when he decided to face it, Pan Yijia was pregnant, which was the biggest problem he had to face. Yu Ying stood still, she had completely suppressed her emotions.She said calmly: "She came to see me a few days ago, I think she knows about our affairs." "Impossible, Yijia won't be so scheming." Until now, Wu Borong couldn't accept the reality that the women around him grew up overnight. "Maybe! But this kind of thing doesn't need scheming, just intuition. This is a woman's instinct, and you men don't know it." Wu Borong came, wanting to hug Yu Ying.Yu Ying took a step back: "You know we've reached this point, we have nowhere to go." Yu Ying pointed to the front, and the city below spread out at the foot of the quiet mountain: "Tell me, which road can we still go?" "Let's go!" Wu Borong's voice became hoarse, and he couldn't bear the tearing. "Go?" Yu Ying smiled, "No, you won't go. You are just stimulated by the current emotion, you can't let go of these things you have. You can't let go of that child, your unborn Son. If we leave, one day, you will regret it and blame us for being ridiculous at this time. At that time, I will blame myself for why I went with you." Yu Ying took a step forward, touched Wu Borong's face and said, "I really hate myself, why do I have to know you so much? Why do I have to know the future so much? Why can't I think so much? Why can't I drag you away without thinking , just fly away like a bird..." Wu Borong pulled her into his arms and hugged her so tightly that he could hear the sound of his heart breaking. Yu Ying sighed, sober love is really cruel, everyone understands what's going on.How wonderful it would be if you could ignore it like boys and girls, and let the fire burn you without crying out for pain! On that winter night, Yu Ying yearned for this embrace.They hugged each other so tightly that they didn't dare to speak, for fear of hearing "goodbye" from each other's mouths.When can we see you again?When dare to see you again?When can we sit together and say "Long time no see" as if nothing had happened?When can you pass by and say hello? Wu Borong, tell me, when can I forget you and stop thinking about you? Wu Borong, tell me, when can I find the person I've been looking for again?That person is not you, can I wait?In this life, can we meet again? I don't meet the person I want to love every day.However, when I met, why didn't I even have the opportunity to cherish it?What I thought was luck was actually a kind of torture. Thousands of thoughts ran through Yu Ying's mind, and finally, her mind sank into a blank. She didn't even remember how they separated or how they got home. After a long time, Yu Ying thought of that winter night, she only remembered the temperature change.Walking through the cold road, she met a warm embrace, that kind of warmth went straight to her soul, she hugged her in love, buried her head in his embrace, and refused to lift it up, as if she had sunk into her mother's womb, safe It was comfortable, but that person let go of his hand again, so the surroundings became colder and colder to the bone, colder than before encountering warmth. That winter, it seemed to be really cold, very cold.