Chapter 17 Mirage 1

(When this article was first published, it was not finished, and the author did not continue to write it, nor included it in a collection or published it separately. Among them, the first chapter to the fourth chapter (except the last section of the fourth chapter) was published in June 1926 " Published in Issue 4 of Creation Monthly.--Editor's Note) one On a sunny and warm afternoon in early December, the Shanghai-Hangzhou express train was delayed by an hour, and it didn't arrive at Hangzhou City Station until after two o'clock.Although the seasons have entered the cold winter at this time, the weather in the south of the Yangtze River is still sunny and lovely. Therefore, among the many passengers who came down from the gate on the west side of the station, there was one who seemed to have just come from the north. The very strong middle-aged gentleman has attracted the attention of ordinary people.He is thin and tall, with a thin face, wearing a sea dragon fur cap on his head, and a navy blue cloak with a round neck of otter fur, which is half-opened and half-buttoned. When the woman and the man got out of the car, walked down the overpass, and walked out of the gate, his fur cap and leather jacket attracted a group of coachmen and hotel pickers to surround him.He speaks with a northern accent, and is holding a large yellow leather basket in his right hand. On the top and bottom of the leather basket, there are many posters of foreign shipping companies and hotels. One can tell that he has traveled thousands of miles by land and sea. from the road.

He stood in the open space in front of the station, surrounded by this group of people, almost unable to make up his mind for a moment which hotel to choose, raised his left hand to shade the sun, looked around for a week, and finally called a A coachman standing on his right pulled him up to the edge of the West Lake. It was the afternoon when Hangzhou citizens listed coins, and there were many pedestrians on the street. He lay in the car and passed Jianqiao Street, worrying about the driver, fearing that the peaceful and lazy residents would be overwhelmed.The sun was slanting in the west, and there was no cloud in the sky. The car was passing a place near the YMCA. He felt that it was too warm, so he unbuttoned his cloak and endured the breeze blowing from the northwest lake.

Passing Huansha Road, and going west towards the lake, the coachman asked him which hotel he wanted to go to?He hesitated for a while, then asked the coachman, which hotel is the best?The coachman told him: "The biggest hotels are West Lake Hotel and Xinxin Hotel." "Which of these two hotels is better?" "The West Lake Hotel is just newly opened, and the prices of the two are about the same." "Then let's go to the West Lake Hotel!" After getting off the car in front of the hotel, he looked at the list of passengers hanging outside the door, and knew that there were not many guests staying in the hotel.Unknowingly, a very contented expression appeared on his lonely face.After being invited in and staying in a room with a window on the west side facing the lake, the waiter brought a traveler's form and asked him to fill it out. Write down his name, place of birth, age, occupation, etc.Chen Yiqun, Beijing, 30 years old, came from Shanghai, to recuperate from illness, no occupation.The waiter took it out and couldn't walk a few steps. Suddenly, he frowned thoughtfully and thought for a while, then immediately called him back and told him:

"I came to West Lake this time to recuperate. If I write my name out, I'm afraid that some friends will come to me. It's troublesome, but it's better not to write my name on the list, you know?" Although he spoke softly , but when he spoke, his attitude was very dignified, so the waiter only agreed "Yes" and went out. After washing his hands and face, and drinking a few sips of tea, he opened the window on the west side, and what came in with the gentle breeze was the landscape of West Lake in the afternoon sun.On the northwest and south sides, there are green hills around the area, and there are clusters of villa Zen forests on the hills, which are very quiet and obviously dotted there.In the woods at the foot of the mountain, the leaves have not yet fallen off, and in the lightness, a winter scene in the south of the Yangtze River is written.Along the long embankment, the horizontal boundary is in the middle of the lake, the dwarf trees in front of the embankment, and the ring bridge in the village are all faintly imprinted on the waves like the moonlight.There are a few loose boats on the lake, parading slowly there.Nearby along the lake 塍, there are many large and small lake tour boats lined up, probably because the year is coming to an end, tourists are sluggish, and a few rowers, with a long face, seem to be only in the sun, making lazy noises. chat.He was alone, glanced lazily out of the window, then returned to the table by the bed, opened the leather basket he had brought, and checked his things.

In addition to the usual change of clothes, there are a few foreign books in the leather basket, which are sandwiched obliquely between the Paradole, toothpaste, toothbrush and other miscellaneous items.He took out a light-blue camel-hair cotton gown and changed it on, then hung the university and black lambskin gown that he had taken off in the dressing mirror cabinet on the east wall, and when he came back he put the table in the room on the bed I tidied up my things, took a foreign book with a red leather cover, walked to the west window and sat down, just when I was about to start reading, the short winter day was already close to the peak behind Tianzhu Mountain, and the scenery on the lake was also brought to life. The dark purple of sunset is coming.

two It is when the first quarter of the new moon is not yet full, and the pedestrians and vehicles on the lakeside road have already scattered in the shadow of the evening, just like late at night. On both sides of the road across the road, because there are several theaters and taverns, the electric lights Down, but still showing a little vitality.The din of citizens coming and going, the sound of car bells, and the occasional car sound that can be heard are mixed together, as if to represent the injustice of the non-resistance and unconscious attitude of Hangzhou citizens. Chen Yiqun walked out of the hotel alone under the shadow of the moon at dusk. After walking on the road for a while, he felt a little hungry, so he went to a restaurant on a side road to have dinner.

As soon as he entered the hotel, he smelled the aroma of fried fish and aged wine.Since he got sick, he should give up smoking and drinking, but his usual reclusive nature of committing suicide could not make him accept the doctor's advice calmly, so once he sat down, he ordered his assistant to boil a catty of old wine.When he was drinking alone, his thin face gradually turned red.He raised his moist big eyes, stared blankly at the empty space in the middle of the street for a while, his brows were furrowed, and he sighed, suddenly a layer of angry expression appeared on his face.As if recalling some sad story, he raised his fist, shook it towards the center of the street, and hit the table with a "boom".Fortunately, the waiter was not there at this time, and no one was eating at the tables next to him. Looking around, he felt amused.Not long after staying in this memory, his usual cold and lonely expression returned to his face.

Drinking alone in a hotel in a foreign country is ultimately boring. After finishing the catty of old wine and eating more than half a bowl of rice, he slowly walked out of the shop and circled a few times on the road, ruthlessly. I walked up to the embankment by the lake in a calm manner; the moon was already hanging high above Zhengkong's head, and the lake was only covered with a layer of bleak silver veil.The sound of coins in the distance seemed to be mocking the lonely guest at the end of the world, the silence by the lakeside, and the emptiness on the lake, all turned into lead and iron, weighing on his heart one after another.He shook his head a few times, sighed a few times, and seemed to be unable to bear it anymore, so he clenched his upper and lower lips, enlarged his steps, and ran back to the hotel in anger.

This kind of lonely sadness was originally written on his face, attitude, and clothing, but after drinking tonight, his sadness seems to be deeper than usual.As soon as he entered the hotel and asked the waiter to open the doors and windows, he didn't wash his face or take a sip of tea, he just lay down on the bed with his clothes on, panting and breathing heavily.The waiter hesitated in the room for a while, wanting to talk to him, but seeing his situation, he didn't dare to make a sound, and walked out the door slowly.His eyes were tightly closed, but a few lines of hot tears leaked from the two tight slits.He didn't know how long he lay there, and suddenly opened his eyes.In the space two feet high above the table, there is an electric lamp with a red glass cover, illuminating his solitude there.A gust of cold wind blew in from the west window, and he flicked the electric lamp. He also felt a little cold, so he stood up and walked to the west window.Before closing the window, he stretched his neck again and stared at the lake for a while.When he glanced back to the window, he suddenly saw two rickshaws running northward on the road. A young woman was sitting in the front car, and a man seemed to be sitting in the back car.His gaze sent them away silently in the moonlight, he closed the window, turned around and saw the cold gray desks and chairs in the room, the wardrobe under the east wall, and a white and empty bed, his The deeper the guest feeling, the faster his breathing became.

With his hands behind his back and his head bowed, he walked around the room for a long time, then suddenly raised his head and stared silently at his yellow leather suitcase for a few minutes.Suddenly his eyes lit up, and with a jump, he quickly opened the leather suitcase, and took out several letters from the pocket on the lid.The contents of these letters are all the same size, the sender is clearly the same person, and the envelopes have been defaced; he turned over one and read it, and on the cover it read "Jinzhou Base Camp presents to Staff Officer Chen, the name of The words "with" are beautifully written.No one can recognize that it is a woman's handwriting.

Yiqun my friend: The letter that got you out of Beijing was at the table of Chen's family.Why did you go in such a hurry?You don't even come here with a note, are you blaming me?I have known you for two years, and I think there is nothing wrong with treating you. Why did you go out of Beijing this time, so you don't miss your old friends and don't let others know? If you know my absent-minded attitude at the Chen family banquet that day, the resentment and restlessness in my heart after returning, the anxiety of looking forward to your letter and news paper every morning, and the enthusiasm of wishing to grow two wings and fly outside the pass to fight with you, Then I think you must take a short vacation to Commander Guo, and fly back to Beijing to explain to me the complaints that have accumulated in your heart. The ferocity of the beards and the crimes of the Fengjun, everyone should condemn. You and Uncle Chen's plan to participate in the anti-Ge, I knew beforehand, but you who are usually so docile and loyal to me, Why is it that this trip out of Beijing is kept secret, without letting me know in advance? The daily newspaper only carries your good news.This morning I received a telegram from Uncle Chen’s family from Gaoliangsu, knowing that within two or three days, the base camp will be moved to Jinzhou, and the Chen family’s family will send winter clothes and equipment to the north. for you. Cold weather, camping, life in the army, how do you get used to it? A pack of gravy, monosodium glutamate, and other supplies were bought a few days ago at the foreign store that you and I often go to in Hadamen, and the two newly arrived novels were also bought from them. Rumors have been circulating between Beijing and Tianjin these days, and Beijing is also very disturbed. The old family members of the Chen family went out with an international car. I wonder when this letter will reach you? There are thousands of words in my heart, I want to write but I can't.I didn't eat all day yesterday, and I had many nightmares at night.I only hope that you will go straight to Shenyang and come back to Beijing to decide the overall situation. Someone came to urge me, so I will stop writing here, I only hope you, I only hope that you will come back soon after the victory. Yi Sun Shang After reading it under the electric light, he took the letter to his mouth, closed his eyes and kissed it deeply.He pressed these letters to his chest fiercely again, as if he was holding something tightly, but when he opened his eyes to look again, the surrounding furnishings illuminated by the electric light were still the same as a room. Hotel vacancies. three When I woke up in the morning, the south-facing porch was already drenched in lovely sunlight.He opened the window to look at the lake. The landscape under the clear sky was extraordinarily peaceful and tender. He recalled the look on his face after drinking last night, as if it was a nightmare.He stared blankly out the window for a long time, then called the waiter to pour some water on his face, and after washing up, he returned to his usual indifferent state of mind.After drinking a few sips of tea and eating some snacks, he asked the waiter to hire a boat for him to swim in the lake.After waiting for a long time, the boatman came. He asked the way and decided the order of the lake tour, so he followed the old boatman downstairs. The sun outside is dim and warm, making the weather almost like spring.On the road along the lake, there are also some vehicles and pedestrians, embellishing the ruins of the old capital there.The continuous lake boats under the embankment are connected back and forth, waiting for tourists in a tight row; many boat owners are scattered near the lake shore, one group here, and the other team are vying for business.There was an old lady in the distance, calling passengers loudly, saying that she was going to Yuefen. Yiqun followed the middle-aged boatman, went south to meet the sun and walked up to the wharf. On the way, he was attacked several times by raiders.After he boarded the boat, he swung to the southwest.Leaving the noisy city behind, looking at the surrounding mountains, the clear sky, and the quiet houses by the water, I feel that my body has left the real world.Life on horseback a few weeks ago, the sound of artillery shells, the enemy's counterattack, fleeing in disguise, the news of my own death that I only saw after arriving in Dalian, and the sudden illness in Shanghai, etc., when such a sunny day In the morning, recalling it again in such a peaceful environment, it seems that it is very far away, and it has been a few years ago.He put aside his distracting thoughts for a moment, and listened quietly to the voiceless sound of the boat's boat hitting the water.Turning his head and looking to the northeast, the strange Baoti Pagoda, which was inserted directly in the middle of the sunny and warm day, caught his eyes first.In addition, I saw the mountain shadow of Geling and a few clusters of western-style buildings along the coast. Probably because the New Year was approaching and there were not many people swimming in the lake, he landed at the gate of Baiyun Nunnery and walked in on the moss-covered stone road until he reached the temple of Old Man Yuexia, but there was no one in charge of the nunnery. People came out to greet him.I looked at the front and back of the temple.He wanted to find a lottery holder to ask for a lottery, but after searching for a long time, he finally couldn't find the lottery holder.After staring at the gentle old man in the glass shelf for a few minutes, he suddenly thought of Yisun and Yisun's men in Beijing. "Alas! You will never be able to pull this red line!" Thinking about this for a while, he suddenly felt that the silence around him was terrifying.The old man's face also seemed to have changed. The old man who was smiling seemed to be shaking his head.He hurriedly turned around, and while walking back to the boat, he was also blaming himself in his heart: "Isn't Yisun married already?" "Isn't Yisun's man my friend?" "Didn't she promise me to be her friend forever?" "Shouldn't, really shouldn't!" After getting off the boat and rowing to Three Pools Reflecting the Moon, his continuous meditation has not been interrupted.He was born silent, and the expression on his face was a bit cold and awe-inspiring, so Funato tried to talk to him many times, but finally finished with a click.He sat silently on the boat all the way, not listening to the wind and water, trying to absorb the haze on the lake as much as possible, but just meditating, thinking about his relationship with Yisun in the past two years.All in all, Yisun can be regarded as an ideal woman.Her lively spirit is revealed in her movements everywhere.Thoughtful and meticulous to ordinary men, while not forgetting her own opinions.For everyone, she knows the most appropriate and gentle attitude she should take.All kinds of daily hobbies and daily clothing, she also knows how to make people around her be attracted to her unconsciously.If you insist on finding fault with her, it is only that she wants to win the favor of people of different sexes too much.It's not Yiqun's jealousy alone, in fact, she loves ordinary men too much.It may be her virtue to explain it kindly, but in any case, from the cautious Chen Yiqun's point of view, this is a great danger for women.He thought of the walk with her under the moon in Beidaihe five or six months ago, and the tight handshake that night, but since Beidaihe came back, he only felt that she was too passionate for her own man.It is the best behavior for a woman to be loyal to her man. Even when he is calm, he only prays for the reconciliation of their husband and wife. He can always be a regular guest in their family, but she is in front of him. All the gestures of affection for her man and for everyone else, in his prejudiced eyes, were at last an insult to him.This time, the determination to join the army, the depression of the few days before leaving Beijing, and the feeling of regret after receiving her letters one after another revived in his heart.Just like when he was in the hotel last night, he clenched his fist again and slapped the side of the boat fiercely. "Funato! Why don't you use some strength to paddle? After paddling for a long time, how come the Three Pools Reflecting the Moon haven't arrived yet?" He asked angrily, but Funato was startled by him. "Sir! Don't be too impatient, isn't the South Causeway of Three Pools Reflecting the Moon in front of you?" He raised his head to have a look, and sure enough, not far from the boat, there was a ring embankment and many willows covering the water.The sun will be noon, and there is no sound of anyone in the pavilion where the moon is reflected in the Three Pools. He looked up to the sky for a while, sighed slightly, and thought for a while, "Ah, this long sky, this long sky. Peaceful winter!" Unknowingly, he returned to his usual relaxed mood.When the boat reached the stone steps in front of the embankment, he ordered the boat owner to row the empty boat to the back and wait, and then walked slowly up the stone railing bridge to look at the rockery steles in the pond. Four After eating some snacks at Santanyingyue and taking a boat to Xinghua Village in front of Yuemiao, the sun had already set in the west, and he felt very hungry.After eating a few bowls of food and wine, he ordered Funato to also get drunk, and then he walked out of the shop slowly and walked towards Xiling Bridge by himself.After all, it was December in the dead of winter, and the people I met along the way were just a few country folks picking up new year's goods, ordinary boys and girls.None.Stepping on the shadow of his own house, he walked past the gate of Dafu Mountain Villa, and saw a lake with blue-purple color reflecting the sun.On the Ziyang Mountain and Chenghuang Mountain on the southeast coast, there is a layer of golden floating color, and in the sky near the top of the mountain, there is a touch of yellow and white clouds.In the center of the lake, there were also a few lake boats returning from a tired swim. However, because of the people on the lake, the shadows of the boats were small, and there were not many tourists sitting in the boats, the slanting afternoon of this day gave him a deep impression of depression.He walked past Su Xiao's tomb pavilion, and stood for a while in front of the roots of willow trees on the Xiling embankment. The green hills around the lake, and in the depths of several depressions, turned a strong blue color. Entering the small gate of Xiling Yinshe, walking all the way, he only met a few tourists of leisure class.After walking around the cave for a while, when he was about to enter the tea pavilion south of the pagoda, his calm state of mind was like a thunderbolt on a sunny day. In an instant, it shook greatly.There were originally two or three seats in the tea pavilion, but the back of a woman in a black satin cheongsam sitting by the window in the south was exactly the same shape as Yisun, and his eyes were fixed on the back of this woman. He stood there in a daze for a moment, and suddenly felt that the eyes of two or three tea guests were shooting at his face, his cheeks were flushed, and he felt even more embarrassed if he didn't want to go in. Feeling that he was an intruder, for fear of disturbing the peace of everyone inside, he quickly circled in his mind and pondered for a while, and he finally stiffened his chest and walked in.The woman at the window turned her head to look at him when he heard his northern accent on Mingcha, and he couldn't help casting a covetous glance at her.His jet-black hair was combed back in one piece.The skin color is translucent milky white, the eyes are huge, and the pupils are very black.The face is oblong and thin, the cheekbones are not high, and the bridge of the nose is very neat.Overall, it looks like the half surface of a goose egg, with a high protrusion in the middle and low left and right sides.The lips are pale, and the curves of the upper and lower lips are not very strongly curved.The hair on the top, the pupils in the middle, and the black cheongsam underneath, set off her sickly milky white face in a particularly deep and charming way.Although he felt embarrassed, when he picked up the teacup to drink tea, he sneaked a few glances at her unknowingly.Now she turned her head back again, looking at the rockery outside the window, and seeing her back, he thought of Yisun again. Sitting opposite her was a gentleman in western clothes of about forty, with a few thin beards on his mouth, who often talked to her, but when she answered him, she never turned her head away from him. The tea table is next to the south window, she sits on the west side, and this gentleman sits on the east side. Yiqun sat alone on an empty table on the north side of the tea pavilion, about a foot away from her seat; there were two empty tables in the middle.On the surface, he seemed to be looking at the trees and blue sky outside the east window of the tea pavilion, but in fact all his attention was focused on her.She was clearly the gentleman's spouse, but the age difference seemed too great.Aunt?No, no, she doesn't have the frivolous habits of the concubine, father and daughter, and there is something wrong.The man's behavior towards her was somewhat flattering.While drinking tea, Yiqun couldn't imagine her background.Suddenly, a group of guests under the east window laughed loudly, and Yiqun was startled. When he looked carefully, it turned out that they were playing Go.The woman was also attracted by the laughter, and turned her head to take a look.Her man seemed to say something funny to her, and Yiqun saw a small smile on her profile, but it was a sad smile, a sick smile. Yiqun is fascinated by her.He actually forgot the end of the world, forgot the setting sun behind him, and even more forgot that he was a guest, so of course he couldn't think of the impatient boat waiting for him outside the door.He wanted to walk several times; but he couldn't get up, and when she and the man got up and passed by his table, he smelled the fragrance of Heliotrope, his dream, Just woke up.He raised his eyes to look in the direction they were going outside the door, and he realized that the setting sun was about to set, because there were only a few patches of setting sun left on the small mountain, and the flat ground was already occupied by the black shadows of houses, pagodas, rocks, etc. . Hastily paid for the tea, and walked down the mountain, the lake was already covered with cold light, only a few spots of lake water and lake smoke, still brewing twilight.The army of the Sanxian Temple blew a bleak trumpet, as if urging him to go back. He stood on the long embankment outside the gate and looked around, but he couldn't see the relationship between her and the man. There were no traces of return boats on the lake, and besides his one, there were only two old and small empty boats waiting in front of the door. Of course, these belonged to the guests who were playing Go.He felt strange again, where did she go? Facing the half moon in the eastern sky, slowly paddling back, the lights of the flag camp are already flickering in the stars.Looking north from the bow of the boat, he saw the villas at the foot of Geling Mountain.He blew the flute a few times with a pointed mouth, but he found a secret in his heart: "She must have crossed the Xiling Bridge and returned to Lihu, and she must have lived near Geling!" Back at the hotel, he washed his hands under the electric light, because his mind was still reminiscing about the disappearing figure in black, so the exhaustion of swimming in the lake all day could not make his mind and body sink down.After ordering the teahouse to bring a few volumes of detailed pictures of the West Lake and tour guidebooks, he leaned on the table and searched the Zen houses and houses along the mountains along the Lihu Lake.While thinking to himself, he made a curious swearing determination like a child: "You young woman in black who has disappeared, I will always find a way to find out where you live and find out your roots. Just wait and see!" Fives The half moon in the center of the lake sank to the west, and the cold light on the lake also added a layer of dark shadows.The heat of the day seems to lure some low-pressure air to the north, and the clear sky is suddenly filled with a row of frightening cloud formations. The gaps in the white clouds are occasionally shot out by the light of a few stars and a few streaks of the waning moon. The gray line even more reflects the desolation and desolation of the lake in this cold night.A gust of cold wind blew down slowly from the northwest, flew across the lake, and when it hit the window of Chen Yiqun, whose lonely lamp was still on, he also felt a little cold. He took out his watch and saw that it was already midnight. For a woman who is also unpredictable in the same wind, she has spent half a night of hard work with such enthusiasm!Yiqun stood up from the pile of pictures of West Lake and thought about it, but he felt a little funny.Stretching upwards, he opened his mouth and yawned. While picking up a cigarette and looking for a match, he softly defended himself by saying: "Ah, if you don't do boring things, how can you spend your limited life?" After lighting a cigarette, leaving the desk, and sitting down in an easy chair, he felt the fatigue of the day hit him.He yawned again, two rounds of sour tears welled up in his eyes, he sat blankly facing the lamp and smoked half a cigarette, and was about to undress and go to bed, when suddenly he felt a twist in his nostrils. He stabbed, shrank his shoulders, and sneezed a few times. "Ah, no, it's cold again!" Thinking of this, he hurriedly adjusted the silk short jacket inside, lay down under the quilt and went to sleep. He was originally neurotic, but he was exhausted all day and sleepless in the middle of the night. After going to bed, he had to think in messy memories and contradictory fears, and draw some illusions when he thought of the female figure in black, so he escaped. The sleep of the group this night is like a short dream in the summer night, just falling asleep and then waking up, just falling asleep and then waking up, unable to settle down.Sometimes he tried his best to get rid of all the distracting thoughts in his mind, trying to suppress his nerves and fall asleep soundly, but these delicate tissues that had been agitated finally couldn't listen to his orders; He was working hard, and the silence pervading the big late-night hotel was trying to penetrate his hearing more and more, until the needles of a wall clock hanging on the wall of the corridor far away, and the wind blowing on the window from time to time. A breath or two of cold wind could disturb his repose to pieces.After a long period of restlessness, he closed his eyes drowsily after his nerves passed the extreme tension and fell back into a state of extreme fatigue; but at this time, the floating clouds outside the window had turned gray and white. , The mountains around the lake also spit out clouds like cooking smoke. The morning light on the lake was engulfed by the gray clouds today, and it was dark for a day, covering the lake waves with no light. In addition, the shadows of the surrounding mountains and the sharp wind from the northwest made the cold sky on the lake gloomy and gloomy. Sensen, it has turned into a kind of unfulfilled weather since morning.Yiqun lay on his side in the hotel's thin quilt with his back bent, and was awakened by the footsteps of the waiter. He heard that it was almost noon.After talking about this sentence with the waiter, the first thing he felt was the hoarseness of his throat.When the waiter went out to make tea and water for him, he still refused to believe that he had caught a cold.In order to test his throat and see if there was any reason why it was dumb, he sat up from the quilt, let go of his throat and called out twice: "Yisun! Yisun!" The timbre of this very familiar name drilled into his own ears, but it was still the muted sound like a broken tin can. "Oh, bad, this is what the doctor predicted!" Thinking of it this way, a scene of being sick in Shanghai unfolded in his mind.When he boarded a foreign cruise ship in a hurry from Dalian, because his body was already in a safe place, his heart that had been tense like a bowstring for half a month suddenly relaxed.When he was nervous, all the excessive fatigue he had accumulated there in the past recovered, so when he arrived in Shanghai, he unexpectedly coughed up blood several times.Before and after coughing up blood, his body was even weaker and weaker. He had experienced all the symptoms of patients with lung disease in the early stages, night sweats in sleep, night fever that must be felt every afternoon, weakness in the waist and feet, and loss of appetite. No, wait.Fortunately, a doctor he knew in Shanghai gave him several hemostatic injections one after another, and told him how to recuperate. Only then did the vomiting stop.After resting for a few days, because the doctor advised him to live in Shanghai where the air is bad for a long time, he made up his mind to go to Hangzhou to recuperate. "Cold is the scariest and most common disease of yours. Because your trachea and lung apex are not good, you can catch a cold very easily. Once you catch a cold and cough, your blood vessels will be damaged. It is about to rupture again, and the haemorrhoids will recur immediately. So you must be careful with this action. Lack of sleep, overwork, too much exercise, etc. are all causes of this disease. After you go to Hangzhou , you should pay attention to these places, especially the body heat should not increase it. Usually, it is good to keep the body heat at 26 to 37 degrees, but you should not be nervous. It is less than 38 degrees. It's not considered a fever. You should always eat less irritating things!" These were the words that the doctor warned him, but now he was really hit by what the doctor said, and he caught a cold in the midst of it without realizing it.It seems that I have a fever, but the cough has not come out yet, so I should go to the doctor as soon as possible, there is probably still time to go today.He thought of this, but the waiter also brought tea into the room. He asked him about the doctors and hospitals in Hangzhou, and the waiter introduced a British hospital to him. After washing his hands and brushing his teeth, he changed his clothes and walked out of the hotel alone without taking a sip of tea.In front of the cold hotel, there was not even a rickshaw parked there at this time.He walked by the shore of the lake, raised his head and glanced at the lake, feeling that the gray sky and the gloomy lake light seemed to be worrying for him. I don't know where the buoyant mood I felt yesterday disappeared. six Walking along the lakeside for a while, I didn't meet many pedestrians on the cold road at the end of the year. It wasn't until I walked on the wider road that slanted from east to west that Yiqun called a rickshaw and sat in the direction of the common name. In the Guangji Hospital of the British Hospital. It was almost noon when the hospital closed. Fortunately, there were not many patients who came to seek treatment, so when Yiqun arrived, he was ushered into a dark internal medicine consultation room without any trouble.The doctor in white work clothes was still very young. He looked at Yiqun's clothes and seemed to recognize the identity of the patient, so when he asked about the source of the disease, his attitude was very serious. Soft, after the body heat test, Yiqun explained in detail his past symptoms, his plan to come to Hangzhou for recuperation, and the situation of accidentally catching a cold. The doctor told him to lie down and listened carefully to him. Once.After listening up and down for about ten minutes, the doctor showed a serious look, and imitated Yiqun with a northern accent and said to him: "Your lungs are still a little weak, and a cold is a trivial matter. You'd better go to the lung hospital in our Pinewood Field. The air is better there, the diet is more restrained, and the prescription is more convenient. What do you think? Sample?" Yiqun came here to recuperate from his illness. Since the hospital has such good equipment, of course he is willing, so after hearing what the doctor said, he immediately agreed to go to the hospital.After inquiring about all the procedures, and asking the doctor to write a few instructions, he went to the accounting office to pay the money, and went back and forth several times. By the time all the procedures were completed, it was already late in the afternoon. I also felt very tired, so I stayed in a hotel by the lake for another night. Within one night, the scenery of West Lake completely changed.In the middle of the night, there were several northwest winds, which made the doors, windows and houses shake a little.Then came a day of fine drizzle, and in the midst of the silence, the cold rain turned into light snow.At eight o'clock in the morning, when Yiqun put on his clothes, he felt that the light in the room was very bright. Although it was a bit unbearably cold, compared with yesterday's gloomy, it was much more comfortable.Pushing aside the glass window on the west side, a gust of cold wind came from the opposite side, which caused him to have several chills involuntarily.Looking around the lake for a week, he actually forgot about his sick body and stood still in the cold wind in front of the window. This is really a wonderful scene of Chinese ink painting. The slopes of the two peaks in the north and south were each sprinkled with a thin layer of light powder, and the surface of the lake between them was printed in ink.Also, on the long embankment, on the small hills, in the dry forest, and the boats on the nearby lake moored there, all became completely white, reflecting the gray sky of low clouds coming and going.A few early boaters walking far away on the lake are just like a few long and narrow black spots, wriggling silently on this pure white background.But what moves people the most is the silence diffused between the vast white world, which is really a great and mysterious silence, and it must be felt forever at such a time and such a place. less than. Yiqun stood in front of the window and looked at it for a while, and then remembered today's news that he was about to be moved to the hospital, and a wry smile appeared on the corner of his mouth. "Isn't this the look of God sending me to the hospital?" Because he saw the snow, he suddenly remembered a legend in a novel about the day Jin Shengtan was executed.这一段传说里说，金圣叹当被绑赴刑场去的那一天，雪下得很大；他从狱里出来，看见了满街满巷的白雪，就随口念出了一首诗来说：“天公丧父地丁忧，万户千门尽白头，明日太阳来作吊，家家檐下泪珠流。”病院和刑场，虽则意义全然相反，但是在这两所地方的间壁，都有一个冷酷的死在那里候着的一点却是彼此一样的，从这一点上说来逸群觉得他的联想，也算不得什么不合情理。 那位中年的茶房冻红了鼻尖寒缩着腰走进他的房里来的时候，逸群还是呆呆鹄立在窗口，在凝望着窗外的雪景。 “陈先生，早呵，打算今天就进松木场的肺病院去么？”茶房叫着说。 逸群回过身来只对他点了点头，却没有回答他一句话，一面看见了这茶房说话的时候从口里吐来的白气，和面盆里水蒸气的上升，他自己倒同初次感得似的才觉着了这早晨的寒冷，皮肤上忽而起了一层鸡栗，随手他就把开着的那扇房门关上了。 在房间里梳洗收拾了下，付过了宿帐，又吃了一点点心，等黄包个夫上楼来替他搬取皮箧的时候，时间已经不早了。坐在车上，沿湖滨向北的被拉过去，逸群的两耳，也感到了几阵犀利的北风。雪是早已不下了，可是太阳还没有破云出现，风也并不算大，但在户外走着总觉得有刀也似的尖风刺上身来，这正是江南雪后，阴冻不开的天气。逸群默默坐在车上，跟看着周围的雪中山水，却想起了有一次和诒孙在这样的小雪之中，两人坐汽车上颐和园去的事情。把头摇了几摇，微微的叹了一口气，他的满腔怀忆，只缩成了柳耆卿的半截清词，在他的哑喉咙里轻轻念了出来： 一场寂寞凭谁诉！ 算前言，总经负。 早知恁地难拼，悔不当初留住。 其奈风流端正外，更别有，系人心处。 一日不思量，也攒眉千度。