Chapter 14 02 The old lady's dream

I ran downstairs as fast as I could, panting. Just as the garbage truck passed by, the door of the opposite apartment opened, and only an old man came out with two bags of garbage. With a thick skin, I quickly ran upstairs from behind the old man, and went directly to the fourth floor. The exterior of the fourth floor looks ordinary, except for the strange black ink writing on a door plaque. "Taiwan Panda Reconstruction Foundation". I thought to myself, although there is a faint smell, but the name of the foundation is written so blatantly, there is probably no strange danger.

So he rang the doorbell. After half a minute, I heard the sound of slippers snapping behind the door. The door opened. "Ah? Hello, hello! Are you introduced to buy pandas?" It was an amiable old lady who opened the door. "Buy...?? No, I'm here...to have a look." Faced with such a straightforward question, I can only speak in a panic. "That's right...well, please come in, please come in." The old lady looked a little disappointed: "It will cost two hundred yuan to visit." "No problem." I said quickly, anyway, nine knives will come out.

"Do you want to take a photo?" The old lady looked at the SLR camera in my hand, quite embarrassed: "We have a commemorative photo service with a discounted price of only 500 yuan for a photo. If you want to take it yourself... Really Sorry." I squeezed out a smile: "Is two thousand yuan okay?" I immediately took out two thousand yuan bills. The old lady reluctantly accepted it, and opened the door completely: "You don't need to take off your shoes." As soon as I entered the house, I smelled an unusually strong body odor. Aunt Wang upstairs has to take a shower several times a day, I guess it has something to do with the smell downstairs.

The point is, there are really five living pandas inside! "Oh my God... this is so ridiculous..." I couldn't believe it, and I couldn't hold the camera steady. Some people say that seeing is believing. But this kind of scene, even if you saw and touched it on the spot, it is surreal and super powerful! Two pandas are sleeping. A panda is teasing its freshly defecated poo on the balcony. A panda is sitting blankly in front of the TV, watching the rerun of "Cooking East and West Army". A panda is eating sugar cane blankly next to the other panda watching TV.

"Wait a minute!" I yelled, "Why do panda bears eat sugar cane!" After closing the door, the old lady gave me a piece of sugarcane with a smile and said, "Because it has been improved." improve?Is this the meaning of the string of words written on the door? "Normally speaking, pandas are such picky animals that are difficult to raise, they should have been extinct long ago. If pandas were not so cute and popular, humans would have ignored them long ago. Extinction will be extinct." The old lady sighed. He continued to explain: "If pandas can be made not to be picky eaters, they won't be so easy to die."

"..." I held the sugarcane and heard it inexplicably. Makes sense, but also makes absolutely no sense. Here are five live pandas!No matter what you eat, it's too much to eat anyway! "So I started genetic modification, first to solve the problem of eating, I thought, bamboo is not nutritious enough, so I trained my pandas to eat sugar cane, and sometimes they also eat carrots and cucumbers, or drink mung beans Tang, look, aren’t they fat and strong?” The old lady took my hand and touched the dazed panda watching TV. It is indeed fat and strong, so picky eaters really can't do it.

"The point is, don't let them get addicted to eating expensive food, otherwise it will be difficult to raise, right?" "Of course." I agree. This reason is similar to the reason why you don't want to read other pirate comics after reading "One Piece". "And then there's low-level entertainment. Look, I'm small here, right?" "There are five panda bears in this place, it's really small." "So, it's very difficult to keep pandas in such a small place. What if they yell and run around and the neighbors protest?" The old lady said earnestly, "Fortunately, there is a TV. They are all very bad at TV, and they are fascinated immediately... I don’t know if I can understand them or not, but it’s fine if they don’t make any noise.”

Yes, just like children, as long as they don't make noise, and don't pee anywhere, they are good children. "Wait a minute." I suddenly thought of an important question: "If you want to transform, you still need the first original panda that hasn't been modified yet?" "No need." "Why not?" "Aren't pandas just black and white? Well, I just took out the Taiwanese black bear and completely modified its genetics. Basically, it is very simple to make the Taiwanese black bear grow black and white fur, but to make the black fur It took me several years to keep the white fur neatly and not to be mixed with the real panda, and the position should be exactly the same as that of the real panda." The old lady said quietly.

"So there is such a practice!" I was shocked. In mainland China, sneakers and mobile phones of well-known brands are often faked, and even cars can be faked. But they would never have imagined that the mainland's national treasure, the panda, could be faked by others! I have an inexplicable excitement. Made in Taiwan, Taiwan is really a place where miracles are created! "Looking at your expression, you seem to be surprised?" The old lady stroked the sleeping panda inscrutably, and said, "If you simply turn the Taiwanese black bear into a Taiwanese black and white bear, basically the shape is still not good enough. ... so I spent several years studying other parts of the gene."

"awesome!" "Then I thought, even if I make the Taiwanese panda exactly the same as the mainland panda, so what? We must do a good job and do better, right? So I will definitely make the Taiwanese version of the panda Transform them to be more approachable, make them smaller in size, more naive in appearance, and milder in temper. In the past two years, I have finally broken through these breeding techniques, and they will soon be mass-produced.” "Mass production!" I seemed to be struck by lightning. "There are so few cat bears, because the fecundity of pandas is not good, so it is very important to increase the desire of pandas to have sex." The old lady touched the fat penis of sleeping pandas, and said with a smile: "My family made it in Taiwan. Pandas do it more than a dozen times a day, so they give birth at least once a year!"

"It's too sexy!" I clenched my fist and shouted, "This is the spirit of Taiwan!" Then, the old lady said a lot about the "vision" of Taiwan's pandas. The future copycat version of Panda must be less picky, quieter, less smelly, and more coherent. With her efforts, these Taiwan pandas will continue to have sex, undergo genetic modification, and continue to receive training. Soon, there will be Zhenggang Taiwan pandas who can eat Weili fried noodles for a living, and their body odor will also be reduced. It has been greatly improved to a level close to that of ordinary dogs. To my surprise, twenty-six Taiwanese pandas have been successfully sold from here. "To whom?" I asked cautiously. "Some small businesses, some owners of listed companies, and private collectors... At present, some wealthy people buy them in a low-key manner. In fact... some zoos also secretly bought a few for research." The old lady said. With a mysterious smile: "Sir, do you want to buy one?" "...How much is one?" I swallowed. "After all, there are only five left, so the current price is 10 million, and the cost is cheap." The old lady smiled from ear to ear, and said, "But I will tell you secretly, wait until the official mass production. One day, it will be much cheaper, I hope it can be lowered to 10,000 yuan per piece. What do you think?" I said blankly, "I think, 10,000 yuan a piece is really cheap." "Selling cats and bears like dogs is the biggest dream of my life." The old lady closed her eyes and immersed herself in her beautiful imagination: "At that time, if you want to see a panda, you don't need to go to the wooden fence. You will see someone taking a panda for a walk on the street when you cross the road and waiting for the traffic lights, and someone is bathing the panda in the bathtub at home. , Some people are hugging pandas to sleep, some people are feeding them instant noodles..." I almost cried. "Old lady, you must persevere!" With tears in my eyes, I quoted the classic saying of my bad boss Nine Swords: "Dreams that will be laughed at when spoken out are of value in practice. Even if you fall, the posture It will be very heroic too!" Later I took a lot of photos at the Taiwan Panda Transformation Center. There are photos of pandas drinking mung bean soup, photos of pandas having sex in 3P, photos of pandas so hot that they turn on the refrigerator to blow air-conditioning, photos of pandas playing with poop, photos of pandas falling down on their heads, and photos of pandas beating each other with sugar cane Photos coming and going. All inclusive, all are some wonderful pictures that will definitely be called "synthetic fakes" when they are placed on the Internet. "Good job." Jiu Dao looked at the photo with satisfaction and kept nodding. But those photos are not of the Taiwanese version of Panda, but of the blind Aunt Wang. and after? As you can see, raising cats and bears as dogs did not create a major whirlwind. But I have already started to save money, 10,000 yuan... I will buy a Taiwanese version of the panda and take it home, one day!