Chapter 13 01 Aunt Wang's areola

I don’t know if every writer is like Nine Swords. It’s so fun. In addition to writing some bad novels, he can also give speeches everywhere—wherever he speaks, he can play wherever he goes. Taiwan runs through, even Kinmen I have been to Matsu Penghu and other outlying islands, which is really enough. Nine Knives gave lectures and received applause for vanity, and I heard that he planned to make a movie by himself as a director, so he didn't have time to collect themes for writing.There are so many foreign affairs, and the writing of novels is getting slower and slower. In my opinion, the reason why most writers become inferior, rotten, and depraved is that, apart from the reason of creating obstacles for readers, it starts from the increase of such unscrupulous things.

Fortunately, Nine Knives was willing to spend money, and hired an assistant like me who silently helped him collect inspiration. Not only did he help him deal with many bullshit daily chores, but he also quietly helped him go up and down the mountain to see if there were any strange things that could be written into the article. in his novel. It is said that last week, Jiudao received a letter. "Wang Daming, come to my house to mop the floor later, and let you read a letter by the way." "it is good." Nine knives were still on the phone, and they said the very dick words quite naturally: "By the way, I don't have a mop at home, so you bring it yourself from your home. The mop needs to be from 3M, thank you!"

"...Okay boss." I'm no longer surprised. Two hours later, I reported to Jiudao's with the 3M mop I just bought. Jiu Dao, who was grabbing the film, opened the e-mail and let me see the contents of the letter he said. Big knife: Hello, let me introduce myself first, my nickname is brain damage, because I have been a brain damage since I was a child. I am a middle school student who loves to read your novels. Every day in class, I secretly read your novels in the drawer, because I can’t understand what the teacher is teaching. It’s too difficult. I hear everyone talking about your novels. The novel is very stupid, even I am so stupid that I must be able to understand it, so I started to read it, and it was really stupid, even I could understand it, but everyone said that I would only get more and more stupid when I read your novels.

But I risked it!After all, to me, you are my idol, just like the rubber man Lufu and Zhou's penis. I have read your novels to learn the principles of life. You said that life is a constant battle, so I also decided to You have to keep fighting in your life and be a useful person. The point is, these past few nights I have been peeking at Aunt Wang taking a shower on the back balcony of my house (Aunt Wang’s areola is so big), I thought that you are also a very horny person, so I quickly took a picture with my phone Thank you, please see the attached file! PS: By the way, how can I work hard to become a (erotic, cross out) great novelist like you?

Sincerely, student Gao Weiyan (Yan, strike out) with a brain disability Even my own name can be spelled wrong, it is really a luxurious limited edition in the brain. "Oh, it turned out to be a brain-dead middle school kid. He really insulted you boss by saying that." After reading the letter, I pretended to be filled with righteous indignation and said, "Do you want me to beat him? Okay, I will Go after dragging!" "Mopping the floor is a must. If you hit it, you don't have to." Nine knives remained unchanged, and opened the attached file picture of the letter: "Look!"

Those pictures are a series, but they are really blurry and the pixels are small. The mobile phone lens of that brain-damaged junior high school student is so bad that I can barely see a naked woman showering by the window. The so-called areola is very big, so it is completely impossible Got it. "The picture is small, it doesn't matter, I can zoom in. It's not clear enough, it doesn't matter, I can use drawing software to sharpen the edges." Nine Knives triumphantly, opened the same series of processed sneak peek pictures for me to see. Tsk tsk, I was stunned for a moment, that Aunt Wang was completely exposed, and Aunt Wang's areola, which is said to be terribly big, really lived up to her reputation.

"Boss, you are really..." I frowned, I really couldn't agree with his mentality. "Aside from Aunt Wang's areola, the point is here..." Nine knives pointed at Aunt Wang's bottom. Below, of course, does not refer to that below. It was the downstairs balcony where Aunt Wang took a bath, and there was a large group of black and white things glued together. "What is that?" My first reaction was some kind of animal. "It's a panda." Jiu Dao said decisively. "Huh? Panda?" "Look, in these continuous pictures, the black and white thing is obviously moving. If I play these pictures continuously! Don't you think that Aunt Wang's areola is shaking... No, that black and white thing Is something pooping on the balcony?"

"The panda is pooping?" "Of course I can't be sure, so I want you to go there and investigate. If possible, I will visit that family in person to make a 100% confirmation." Nine knives copied an address on a piece of paper and gave it to me, saying: "I have already asked I gave up the address of that brain-dead junior high school student, and when you went there at night, you would say that you were applying for a tutor." "Okay." I nodded sharply. An animal suspected to be a panda appeared in a certain ordinary family's house-even if you think about it, you know it's impossible!

But if you want me to spend nine knives to investigate a very boring matter, no problem! Nine Knives took out a huge monocular camera from the room and handed it to me carefully. "Also, this is my DSLR camera. Remember to take a few more clear photos of pandas." Nine Knives gave a thumbs up and said solemnly: "Remember, you are here to take pictures of pandas, not I took a picture of Aunt Wang’s areola, but if I accidentally take a picture of it, there’s nothing I can do about it, you know?” "……understood." As for why Jiudao thought of using drawing software to continuously zoom in, and then use the "sharp edge" function to post-create this small and blurry voyeur photo?Tsk tsk, I won't think about it.

After dragging the ground, I set off. The brain-dead middle school student lived in Dazhi, Taipei, an old apartment that was at least thirty years old, on the fifth floor. Considering that he is an idiot, I bought a banana as a gift before I went. "This is?" Junior high school student Gao Weiyan looked dumbfounded. "Banana." I patted his head. Too bad I haven't even seen a banana. "I know it's a banana, but why are you giving it to me?" Gao Weiyan seemed taken aback again. "Of course it's for you to eat." I patted his head again.

It's so pitiful. Although he pretends to know about bananas, he doesn't even know that bananas are used to eat. "Do you want to see it?" Gao Weiyan asked. "Is there anything to watch now?" "That's right, Aunt Wang has to take a bath several times a day, so you can watch it whenever you want." So, while eating bananas, Gao Weiyan took me to see Aunt Wang taking a bath. The distance between the old apartments is not wide, only half a street away, and Aunt Wang can be clearly seen taking a shower. Although she is not very beautiful or very young, she is stripped naked for nothing, and I feel embarrassed. What else to criticize. "But that Aunt Wang, why is she so daring, she doesn't even draw the curtains in the shower?" I don't understand. "Because Auntie Wang who just moved in is blind." Gao Weiyan smiled and said, "She thought the bathroom was next to the wall and not the window, so she washed it every day for me." She also made a YA comparison. I see. Bullying blind people is not only stupid, but also cheap. "Why don't you come and see Dao Da?" Gao Weiyan ate the banana in doubt. "He likes to pretend to be busy." I picked up the SLR camera and took a few ultra-clear pictures of Aunt Wang. Damn, just these few photos as evidence are enough to get me on Apple's social version of News! "Pretending to be busy?" "To tell you the truth, Jiu Dao is a bad person in private, so don't waste your time adoring him." "I want to tell him." Gao Weiyan frowned, eating his banana butt. "...But Nine Swords also has a good side. For example, he is very kind to Zhengmei. He often writes back to Zhengmei's blog. He has a sense of justice, filial piety, enthusiasm, and is very kind to Zhengmei... Ah, I seem to have said that Now, Jiu Dao is also very good to his dog... at least better than me. Anyway, there are many advantages! To tell you the truth, I have gained a lot of life inspiration after working for Jiu Dao!" I While sweating coldly, he talked about what I am best at: "Looking back carefully, before I knew Nine Swords, my life seemed to be in vain!" At this time, Aunt Wang hadn't finished washing, and there was a mess of black and white patterns downstairs in her house! I quickly adjusted the angle of the monocular camera, zoomed down, and enlarged the optical zoom to twenty times. what! really...really... Those are really pandas! And those panda bears are actually pooping! "How is it possible?" I was really frightened and kept pressing the shutter. "how?" "The one downstairs is..." I was so surprised that I was speechless. "It's a panda." Gao Weiyan stared at me blankly, as if looking at an idiot: "Have you never seen a panda?" "Of course I've seen it!" I stared back hard, "But why are there pandas here?" "It's nothing special. I watch those pandas taking turns defecating on the balcony downstairs every day. What's so interesting? Of course I want to see Aunt Wang taking a bath. Who wants to see pandas defecating." Gao Weiyan rolled his eyes and said, "I didn't watch it." An idiot like you." Being called an idiot by a brainless person, I really want to explode. but…… "Wait, you just said, that, how many, cats, bears?" "Maybe five or six? Whatever." "Five or six are that many!" "Aren't there two in Mucha Zoo?" Gao Weiyan laughed while holding a soft banana peel. Do it, give me back! "I'm going to check on the fourth floor opposite, there...is there no danger?" I stood up. "Don't you see Aunt Wang taking a shower? Idiot." Gao Weiyan looked at me with sympathetic eyes. Goodbye stupid. Please continue to watch the blind woman take a bath without public morality, and continue to worship the nine knives of the dead.