Chapter 16 What is the second part of love like? (2)

Coincidentally, I have a good voice...I dream...dream, maybe, I can make money by singing!I think the night is beautiful!He doesn't seem to be in a rush to sleep! Then, we finally had sex!That's when the anxiety hit me again and I started crying and couldn't stop!So, he held me in his arms, talked to me tenderly, caressed me gently...then, he fell asleep! The next day, I was still a virgin! He accompanied me all the way to the subway entrance.It's still freezing and snowing! We walked past a big shoe stand: there were galoshes!I stopped to look at it, but didn't touch it. It was marked ten francs.I can seem to see that this pair of rubber shoes is covering up my broken shoes.My feet seem to have warmed up!

But he woke me from my reverie, saying: "Come on, let's go! In a quarter of an hour, I have to rehearse!" That's it!Everything is too beautiful to be real.Such good luck can only be found in fairy tales!What a sad way home!I dare not go back to Ewa's place and become her burden! I'm back on rue Vavin in Montparnasse again!The snow continued to fall, very finely.The cold went straight to my bone marrow.I'm freezing.I don't know why I am walking alone in the street without even a sou on me.I stopped in front of an antique store. Night had not quite fallen yet, and I felt miserable and hopeless.

A mirror revealed a pale, emaciated little girl, with hair pitifully clumped together, and eyes like those of a desperate doe! I put my nose against the window so no one can see me! However, one person stood by my side!In the mirror, I saw a tall, thin young man with shining green eyes. He talked to me and told me he didn't have much money, but there was a fire in his place.Finally, he put on a good friend and said: "Come to me! You can warm yourself up, and we'll have another glass of elska, so we won't die of hunger!" I came to his studio.He built a fire with wood that looked like furniture!However, he seems to be more active than yesterday!He made me take off my coat.

I am embarrassed to admit to him that I have no shirt on! So, he gave me a clean sheet, and I cut a piece from a place that wasn't too ugly.He rummaged in a drawer and found two meters of ribbon from his wedding. He still had two francs in his pocket.While he was out shopping for food, I made a shirt, the kind a peasant woman wears.The white satin works great and I don't feel so ugly anymore!I freshened myself up, he was out for a long time and I was free to dress myself up as the bride! To be honest, my body was shaking.If the age of the first man and his gentle and shy demeanor made me feel safe, this one looked resolute.However, I no longer cry.I am ready.I don't feel happy, no!But I was curious, half-push and half-satisfied.I'm afraid, but I love it!I've heard it hurts the first time, but after that it's wonderful.As a child, I already knew what "going to heaven" was, and I used to touch myself a lot because I loved carnal pleasure.

I climbed onto the bed under the beam and lay on my back with my shirt loosened, one breast neatly exposed, and two braids spread out on the pillow. In short, my director level is comparable to a coquettish woman! Only, everything is not exactly as I once dreamed!I still remember seeing it at the bookbinding, I was so far away from those loves full of flowers and thoughtful thoughts! My partner didn't even notice my breasts and pretty blouse when she lay down next to me. He gets right to the point!He looks anxious!However, despite his efforts, despite my sincerity, he never succeeded!

The next morning, I was still unscathed. It was cold in the studio and we had nothing to eat.But I am happy, I feel rich: I have a man of my own, a place to sleep.I'm still a virgin, but I have hope. I showed seriousness, and I was happy with my talent as a cobbler.I gave his shoes, and mine, with soles and heels. Then, I told him to stay at home and not move, I would get a job and he just did his painting. I have the address of a painter who needs models, he lives in Val de Grasse, and I walk there. I went to his house. He made me undress, and I posed for three hours, drinking a cup of tea without sugar, and had to watch out for his always out-of-the-way hands.

But, when it was over...he didn't even give me a sou! What makes it worse!My enthusiasm was suddenly dashed!I left in despair, but I dare not go back.When I went out in the morning, I was still full of ambition, looking forward to bringing back the first dinner, and the two of them could enjoy it together affectionately! I went near the Gare Montparnasse and sat down on a public bench opposite the Plancy pharmacy.I stared blankly at people coming in and out, without any other thoughts in my mind, only thinking about how to get back to the studio! At this time, a well-dressed little old man sat next to me.He was holding a beautiful cake paper bag carefully in his hand, and the snow was still falling, and I thought, maybe the paper bag will break, it is already soaked.If I help him pick up the cake, maybe, he'll give me a piece.

I'll run to bring it back to Robert! It's a pity that my wish didn't come true, this paper bag is too strong! The old man chatted with me.I told him about my experience as a nude model and he showed no sympathy!He doesn't know what it's like to be hungry! Finally, he said to me: "Come with me behind the Gare Montparnasse and show me your tits, and I'll give you three francs." My stomach is really hungry!I thought of Robert, he must be hungry too! So, I followed him to the back of the train station.I wasn't wearing a lot of clothes, and when I lifted my coat a little, my breasts were exposed.He was dumbfounded!Not to brag, but let's just say, I have gorgeous breasts.

Despite my small stature, my breasts are funnel-shaped, with snow-white skin, small pink nipples, and a blue vein crawling gracefully on them. The old man was so surprised that he didn't even think to touch it.I asked him for the three francs and he gave me the money without taking his eyes off my breasts, as if hypnotized! I quickly put away my pair of treasures, and left him there alone, speechless. Of course I cried a lot after that, I was ashamed and felt like a pheasant. I returned with a full load and told Robert nothing.I brought back many delicious things, and I saw his satisfied eyes.