Chapter 5 Part 2-1

I cried for two days after reading this sad letter.The sad thing is not so much that he refused my request, but that the letter shows his shameful behavior.I am now a criminal again!I cried loudly, I obeyed the law like this, but I was going to be brought to court again! Even so, I still don't regret it at all.No matter how much disaster befalls me, as long as my soul is pure, I will not regret it.What could be wrong with me but that I have been too governed by the sentiments of justice and integrity which will never die out! However, I cannot believe that what the Earl told me about the search was real.The chances of a search are slim, and it would be extremely dangerous for him to take me to court.I think he is more afraid of seeing me in his heart, so there is no need for me to tremble at his threat.With this in mind, I resolved to stay in this place, even as long as possible, until I could save up a little more money and be able to leave.I told Rawden of this plan, and he agreed, and even suggested that I stay with him.But before I tell you about my decision, it is necessary to tell you about Roden and the people around him.

Roden was a man of forty.He had a darker complexion, thick eyebrows, and bright eyes. He looked powerful, well-built, and at the same time a bit sensual.His social status was much higher than his profession, he had a pension of 110,000 or 20,000 livres, and he took up the profession of surgeon only as a hobby.He had a very fine house in Saint-Marcel, and his wife had been dead for some years, so he lived in it only with his daughter and two girls who served him.His daughter, Rosalie, had just turned fourteen.She combines the most attractive charms: fairy waist, round face is extremely bright, sweet features are very cute, the most beautiful mouth is admirable, big black eyes full of vitality and emotion, She had chestnut hair that fell down to her waist, skin that was incredibly smooth and delicate, breasts that were already raised to a height rarely seen in the world, and, besides, a man of extraordinary intelligence, vivacity, and a beauty of heart.The two companions with whom I shall serve in this household are peasant women, the one a housekeeper and the other a cook.The former might be twenty-five years old, the other eighteen or nineteen.Both are extremely beautiful.This choice made me doubt Roden's intentions to keep me.

I thought to myself: Why does he need a maid? And why does it have to be beautiful? There must be something strange in it, which is contrary to the normal moral norms that I absolutely don't want to deviate from. I used this lull to improve my relationship with Rosalie, deciding to settle in her father's house only if there was nothing in her father's house that disturbed me.With this intention in mind, I observed everything carefully.The next day, I found out that this man had an arrangement, which made me suspicious of his behavior from the beginning. Mr. Rawden maintained a boarding school for boys and girls in his own home, a right he had inherited from his late wife, and it was not considered necessary to deprive him of it when his wife died.Mr. Roden's pupils were small, but carefully selected, only fourteen girls and fourteen boys.He never took anyone under twelve, and sent them away as soon as they were sixteen.Rawdon's students couldn't be more handsome.If someone recommends to him a student who has some physical problems or doesn't have a pretty face, he will always have a way to refuse. All kinds of excuses are all sophistry, but they are irrefutable.In this way, either his students cannot be full, or all of them are very beautiful.The children did not eat at his house, but they came twice a day, from seven to eleven in the morning and from four to eight in the afternoon.I didn't see these children before, because it was a holiday when I came, and the children didn't come to class.They came back when I was almost fully recovered.

Roden taught the boys' classes himself, and the housekeeper looked after the girls.He taught the girls after he taught the boys.He taught the children writing, arithmetic, history, common sense, drawing, music, all these subjects with only one teacher. I first expressed my surprise to Rosalie: her father was a school teacher as well as a surgeon.I said to her that I wondered why he should be so busy when he could be so comfortable without having to do both.Rosalie, with whom I already got on well, laughed at my thought.This treatment of my inquiry aroused my curiosity, and I begged her to tell me all.

The lovely girl, with all the innocence of her age, and the innocence of a lovable character, replied: "Listen, Therese, I'm going to tell you everything, and I see that you're a straight girl . . . without giving away the secret I am about to tell you. Of course, my dear friend, my father had no business at all. There were two reasons why he took up the two occupations you see. Let me tell you. He was A surgeon for fun, and his pleasure in making new discoveries in his field. His discoveries are endless. He has published some well-appreciated scholarly works, and he is generally considered the best doctor in France today. He had worked in Paris for twenty years, and retired to the country for his amusement. The real surgeon of St. Marcel was a man named Lombo, whom he took under his administration for the benefit of his experiments. Service. Tyrese, do you wonder now what impelled him to run a boarding school? . I had no choice but to obey his desires, and he took advantage of them. By the way, you come and follow me. Today happens to be Friday, and three days a week he has to discipline students who have made mistakes. Today is one day. Father is in this discipline I'm telling you, follow me and you'll see what he does. You can see it all from a little room next to my bedroom, which is next door to his operating room. Let's go there quietly Go, but promise me that you will never utter a word of what I tell you, what you are about to see."

It was so important to me to know the character of the man who offered me refuge that I would not miss any opportunity of revealing something to me.I followed Rosalie.She held me up against the not-quite-fitting walls, with enough space between the planks to allow me to see everything that was going on in the other room. We had just settled in when Roden came in.He took a fourteen-year-old girl with fair skin, as beautiful as Venus.The poor girl burst into tears, and trembled at the punishment she was about to receive.She moaned after the stern teacher noodle.She knelt at his feet, begging for forgiveness.But it was in this sternness that the hard-hearted Rawden kindled the spark of lust, which had already sprung from his heart through his fierce eyes. ,

"Oh! no, no!" he cried, "no, no! Julie, you make too many mistakes like this. I regret that I was too lenient, only to make you make mistakes again and again. But this time , even if I wanted to, would the magnitude of the mistake warrant my pardoning you? . . . walk into a classroom and pass a note to a boy!" "Sir, I swear absolutely not!" "Hmph, I saw it with my own eyes, I saw it." "Don't take his word for it," Rosalie told me. "These are mistakes he made up to justify his excuses. This girl is an angel, and he treated her so hard because she resisted."

Rawden, aroused now, seized the girl's hands and tied them to the iron rings of a post in the middle of the punishment room.Julie couldn't resist anymore, she turned her beautiful face to the executioner feebly, her thick black hair was loose, tears flooded that rare and beautiful face in the world, the most gentle and distressing face .Roden looked at the picture, and his heart burned.He covered the begging eyes with cloth strips, and Julie couldn't see anything.So, Rawden tore off her shy veil even more wantonly, lifted up her blouse, and receded her nipples to her waist...how white!how beautiful it is!This is the hand of the three Graces spreading rose petals on the lily.How cruel it is to have such a bright and mind-swinging beautiful jade body brutally destroyed! How can such a demon seek pleasure so much in the face of the other party's tears and pain? Rawden admired, his confused eyes patrolling With hands desecrating the cruelly picked flowers.We were right across from them, and we could see his every move clearly.The whore showed the sweetness and allurement that made him ecstatic, in various gestures, but only so much.Although the true temple of love is at his hand, Roden, who is faithful to his beliefs, doesn't even look at it.He was even afraid of its appearance, and once her posture gave it away, he quickly covered it up, and he felt disrespectful even if it deviated from it even slightly, and he didn't want to be even slightly distracted. ... At last, unable to restrain his rage any longer, he hurled abuse at the trembling poor little girl, who was about to be shattered under the blow, cursing her with all kinds of vicious words and threats.Luo Deng couldn't control himself anymore, he picked up a handful of wattles from the water basin, the vines became greener after being soaked in vinegar water, and they became more powerful to whip...

"Come on," he said, approaching his victim, "are you ready, it's going to take a while..." The cruel fellow swung his strong, powerful arms and whipped the thorns straight in the All exposed parts of the girl's body.After twenty-five blows, the delicate red skin and tender flesh were all bloody. Julie kept howling, and one piercing cry tore through my heart.Tears flowed from the blindfold and fell like strings of pearls on her beautiful cheeks.Seeing this, Roden became even more insane.He put his hands over the ravaged parts again, rubbing them hard, pinching and pinching, as if preparing her for another attack.Sure enough, this attack was followed by the first blow, and Roden started again.Every time he was whipped, he must first yell, threaten, and reprimand...the blood flowed down.Roden was ecstatic, and he admired these vivid and powerful proofs of his brutality with ecstasy.He couldn't contain himself, the lowest indecent state showed its flames, and he wasn't afraid to show it all.Julie couldn't see him... For a moment, he wanted to mount as the winner, but didn't dare, so the brutal abuse began again.He swung his arms round and whipped, and under the vigorous whipping, he finally opened the door to the place where beauty and sensuality were hidden... He didn't know where he was, he was so intoxicated that he couldn't use his reason.He cursed, he insulted, he went berserk, nothing escaped his savage blows, and everything that lay before his eyes was treated with the same brutality.The villain finally stopped, he felt that if he continued to fight, he could only use up his strength-he still had to retain his strength, and then went on to perform other people's operations.

He clapped Julie, ordered, "Put on your clothes," and at the same time arranged his clothes, and said, "If you do that kind of thing again, think carefully, you won't let you go so cheaply! " Julie went back to the classroom and Rawdon went to the boys' classroom.After a while, he brought back a fifteen-year-old boy, who was very beautiful.Roden scolded him.Undoubtedly, being with this boy made him even more presumptuous, and he sweet-talked and kissed him, and taught: "You deserve to be punished, and this is going to make you suffer!" With that, he and the little boy crossed any boundaries of shame.This time, everything interested him, nothing was excluded, the coat was turned up, and every part was touched.Rawdon threatened, fondled, kissed, cursed, his rebellious fingers trying to incite the little boy to be as sexual as he demanded.

"Okay," the sex-crazed man said to the boy when he saw his success, "but you're also in my forbidden state now... I promise, two more moves and your stuff will squirt onto me..." Reveling in the itch he created, the slut sang praises, his mouth dedicated to the temple of tender compliments.His hands stimulate eruptions, he attracts them, devours them, and he almost explodes himself, but he still has his way. "Ah! I will punish you," he said, rising to his feet. He seized the boy's hands, captured them, and he offered the altar completely to himself, on which he wanted to quench his wrath.He opened the altar and kissed all over it, sinking his tongue in and getting lost inside.Lust and cruelty make Rawden intoxicated... Suddenly, he shouted, "Ah! Little bastard, you caused my hallucinations, I want revenge!" Rawdon grabbed the wattle and whipped it again.No doubt he was stimulated more by the presence of boys, and his strokes became stronger and more frequent.The boy wept, Rawden was ecstatic.But new pleasure called to him, and he let go of the boy, and ran off to call other victims.A thirteen-year-old girl took the boy's place, another boy took the girl's place, and another girl.Roden whipped nine: five men and four women.The last was a boy of fourteen with a delicate face.Roden is going to enjoy it.The boy resisted a bit, and was beaten by the lecherous Roden, who could no longer control himself, and sprayed the young student's tormented body with a frothy froth of lust, from the waist up to the The feet are all wet.Our punisher, annoyed at not being strong enough to make it to the end, unhappily let go of the boy and sent him back to class, assuring him that he had nothing to lose.These were the words I heard, and these were the scenes that shocked me. Immediately after this horrific scene was over, I said to Rosalie, "My God! How did it get to such an unsightly state? How can he have fun abusing someone?" Rosalie replied: "Ah! You don't know everything," she said as she took me back to her room, "Listen, what you just saw just showed you my father's love for men and women. The fun that the student gets from doing things conveniently, in fact, his bad behavior is far more than that, he also plays with girls in the same way as he played with boys (the criminal way Rosalie told me, that is, I escaped from prison and fell into the bandit ringleader When he mastered it, he wanted to enjoy me in the same way. Later, the Lyon businessman used this method to defile me)." The girl went on to say, "In this way, the girls' virginity will not be destroyed, don't worry Pregnancy doesn't prevent them from finding a husband. He rapes almost all the boys and at least half the girls this way every year. Of the fourteen girls you see, he's done it to eight and nine of the boys. The two women who served him were similarly mutilated. . . . Oh, Therese," said Rosalie, throwing herself into my arms, "oh, dear friend, I too, long before I He seduced me as a child, and I was murdered when I was eleven years old... Alas! I have become a victim, I cannot defend myself..." "But, madam," I interrupted, terrified, "and religion? At least you have this way... Can't you find a confessor and tell him everything? " "Oh, you don't know that in the course of his torment we have killed every seed of religion in us. He forbids us to confess anything, and besides, I will never confess. He never taught me. About Religion, he told me a little, just because he was afraid that my total ignorance would reveal his lack of belief in God. I never went to confession, and I never received the sacrament. He is good at making religion ugly, and makes It penetrates to the tiniest of our thoughts, and all the girls who are subject to him are led forever away from religious duties. Even if they are obliged to perform these duties for family reasons, it is done with indifference and utter indifference, So he wasn't worried at all that they wouldn't be able to keep the secret. You have to believe it, Teresa, prove it with your own eyes," she said, pushing me back into the hut we just came out of, "you Come on, this room where he chastises the students is the room where he makes fun of us. Now that the lessons are over, and the preparatory activities have burned him all over, he's going to ask for compensation for the restraint he sometimes has to be cautious. Dear Girl, stand where you were, and your eyes will see all." Although I wasn't curious about this new ugly trick, it seemed to me better to hide in this cabin than to be spotted with Rosalie during class.Rawdon may have become suspicious.No sooner had I settled down than Rawdon went into my daughter's room, and led her into the previous room, and the two maids also went.There, the brazen Rawdon has no scruples, indulges in indulgence, and makes no secret of his unusual fornication.He whipped the two completely naked women with rounded arms, and when he whipped one, the other whipped him too.At the same time, he gave the most nasty, wildest, most disgusting caresses to the altar of Rosalie, who, bound to a post, leaned over to offer the altar to him.At last it was the turn of the unfortunate girl.While the two women beat him one after the other, sometimes both at the same time, he whipped his daughter from the waist down to the bottom of the calf, full of joy and excitement.He howled, he cursed, he whipped.Immediately his lips kissed where his whip fell, and kissed the altar and the mouth of the victim...everywhere, except the front, which he had sucked.Soon, without changing his position, but making it more favorable to him, he sank into the little sanctuary of pleasure.Meanwhile his housekeeper dedicated the same throne to his kisses, and another woman whipped him with all her might.Rawden gradually entered the fairyland, he split and tore, thousands of kisses became more passionate than one, vented his exuberant lust on the object dedicated to his lust, the bomb finally exploded, and this whore dared to taste it with shameful incest The most animalistic pleasure. Roden was going to dinner.After such a fight, physical strength needs to be restored.There are still classes to be held at night, and there are still punishments to be dealt with. As long as I want, I can watch as much as I want.But it was enough to convince myself and answer the demon's request.The day has come when I must answer.Two days after witnessing these dirty tricks, Roden himself came to my room to ask me how I had decided.I was still in bed when he came in.He made an excuse to see if my wounds were scarred. I couldn't object. He had the right to look at my naked body, because he had been doing this twice a day for a month. I didn't find anything detrimental to him. An act of chastity, so I don't think there should be a revolt.However, this time, Roden had other plans.When he touched the object of his admiration, he raised one leg, wrapped it around my waist, and pressed it so tightly that I couldn't move at all. "Terris," he said to me now, groping with his hands in such a way that I no longer had any doubts, "you are fully recovered now, dear, and I have seen the gratitude in your heart that it is you. It's time to express it to me. The solution is very simple, I just ask for this..." The villain continued, while trying to fix me in that position with all his strength, "Yes, I only need this, this is my reward, I Only women are ever asked to do this...but," he went on, "you have the most beautiful thing I've ever seen in my life! So round! . . . so bouncy! . . . so delicate skin! . . . Oh! I absolutely To enjoy enjoy..." As Roden spoke, it seemed that he was ready to execute his punishment.But in order to complete his punishment, he had to let me go for a moment.I took advantage of this gap and broke free from his embrace. "Sir," I said to him, "I beg you to believe that there is nothing in the world that would enable me to participate in the dreadful thing you seem to be doing. I am obliged to you, I agree, but I will not pay the price of guilt." To repay you. I am undoubtedly a poor and very unfortunate girl, it does not matter, I have a little money here," I said, handing him the dry purse: "Please take it, how much do you think you should take? , as you please, if you let me out of this house, please! As soon as my health permits me to leave this house, let me go." My refusal was a great surprise to Rawdon, who hadn't expected such resistance from a girl who had nothing and no one to depend on.According to the usual prejudices of men, he thought that because he was poor, he must be unruly.Roden examined me carefully. "Terris," he added after a moment, "it's not right for you to play chastity with me! I think it's my right to make you appreciate me. It's all right, I don't want your money, but don't leave me. There's a Virtuous girl, I am very happy, the girls around me are so bad!... If you are so moral in this respect, I hope you are so moral in everything. It is also in my interest, because my daughter Like you, she just begged me to ask you not to go. I ask you to stay with us." "Sir," I replied, "I will not be happy here, and those two women who serve you expect all the affection you give them. They will only look at me with envy, and sooner or later I will have to get out of here." of." "Don't worry about it," replied Rawden. "Don't worry about the effect of the jealousy of those two women. I have a way of keeping them in peace while you keep your place. You alone have my confidence, And it will not put you in any danger. However, in order to continue to earn this trust, you'd better know that the main quality I require of you is to be tight-lipped. Many things have happened here, and many things have been against you. Should have seen it all, my boy, listened to it all, but never said anything... Ah, Tyrese, stay here with us, boy, I am too good to leave you Rejoice. My fiery temper, intemperate thoughts, and corrupted morals have involved me in so many evils, so it is at least a consolation to me to have a virtuous girl like you by my side. When I am tired of my sensuality, I will fall into your arms, just like prostrating at the feet of God..." At this time, I thought: "Oh, God! From this point of view, morality is necessary and indispensable to human beings, because evil people have to use it to comfort themselves and use it as a refuge!" Thinking of Rosalie's begging me not to leave her, I believed that there was still some good nature in Rawdon's heart, so I decided to stay at his house. A few days later, Roden said to me: "Therese, I plan to arrange you with my daughter, so that you and those two women will have no troubles, and I will pay you three hundred livres." wages." In my situation at the time, such a position was an asset.I hope to help Rosalie get her back on the right track, and maybe push her father to do the same.This desire set me on fire, so I have no regrets about my decision.Rawden asked me to dress, and immediately led me to his daughter's room, announcing to her that I would follow her.Surprised, Rosalie hugged me and I settled in quickly. Before a week had passed, I was working on my much-desired remodeling.However, Roden's obstinacy made all my methods useless. He replied to my wise counsel: "Don't think that my showing some respect for your morals proves that I value them, that I intend to prefer them to renunciation of vice. Don't think so, Tyrese, or else, You are lying to yourself. People who insist that virtue is important or necessary based on what I have done to you are very wrong. If you think I think so, I will be very angry. When hunting, blazing The sun was shining directly on me, so I hid in a broken house. But this broken house is definitely not a monumental building, it is just an emergency thing, just because I am in danger and found a place to protect me. I'll use something like that, but does this thing become definitely useful, and isn't it so despicable? In a completely wicked society, morality is useless. But Since our society is not like this, it is absolutely necessary to either pretend to be moral, or to use it to make ourselves less afraid of those who do. What good is morality if no one is? Necessity is a matter of opinion, a matter of expediency, and I am not wrong. Morality is not a code of indisputable value, it is merely a mode of conduct. This mode varies with circumstances, Therefore, the mere fact that it does not have anything solid is enough to make it meaningless. Only something solid is really good, and something that is constantly changing is not good. This is The reason why people regard immutability as a perfect morality of God. However, morality has absolutely no such quality: no two peoples on earth have the same moral standards, so morality has nothing true and good in essence , is not worthy of our admiration in the slightest. It should only be used as a pillar, to politically accept the morality of the country you live in, so that those who follow it out of interest or respect it because of their circumstances do not to trouble you, that the respectable morality of the native peoples, in its customary form, protects you from sadists. But, I repeat, all this is only occasional, and all this does not endow and morality of any real value. Besides, a certain morality is impossible for some. How can you make me believe that a morality of rebellion, of transgression against the passions, exists in nature? If it does not exist, how can it be Well? To be sure, among the men involved, the evil that is the opposite of these morals becomes more popular, because it will be the only way or method of being that is more in tune with their flesh or flesh. So, in this assumption, evil would be very useful, so how can morality be useful? For you have shown me that the opposite of morality is harmful. And again, someone will say to you, morality It is good in the sense that it works for other people. If it is agreed that only good deeds should be done to others, then I will accept only morality, because all I get is good deeds done by others. But this reasoning is only a kind of reasoning. Sophistry. Because, theyBy being moral, I get a little of their favor, and I am compelled to be moral too, and thus make a thousand sacrifices for which there is no compensation at all.I got less than I paid for, and I made money-losing deals.It is unequal that one suffers from poverty in order to be virtuous than one gains from those who practice virtue.Since this arrangement is unequal, there is no need for me to submit to it.And, surely, as a moral being, I cannot afford others the benefit equal to the pain I have had to be moral, so should I not give up to them the happiness which has caused me so much pain? ?All that remains now is the harm I may do to others by virtue of my wickedness, and the harm I myself would suffer if everyone were like me.Assuming that evil prevails everywhere, I am certainly in danger, and I agree with that.But the sorrow I caused at the risk was made up for by the joy at making others fearful.Equivalence is thus restored, so that everyone is more or less equally happy, which cannot and cannot be achieved in a society where some are good and others are evil.Because the result of such mixing is to produce continuous traps, and such traps would not exist in another society.In a mixed society, all the interests come from different individuals, and this is the source of endless misfortunes.In another kind of society, all interests are equal, every member has the same interest, the same tendency, everyone is moving towards the same goal, and everyone is happy.Yet fools tell you that evil does not make a man happy, and it does when all agree to worship morality.But if you despise what you call good, you will only worship what you foolishly call evil.Everyone, then, takes pleasure in doing evil, not because it is permissible—sometimes this is precisely one reason that makes it less attractive; but because the law no longer punishes it, and It is because men fear the law, which diminishes the pleasures which nature bestows on sin. "I suppose there is a society in which incest (to cite this crime as an example is as much a crime as any other) is recognized as a crime. The incestuous person will be unhappy, because opinion, law, belief, all to cool their pleasure. Those who want to do it, but dare not do it because of this hindrance, are also unfortunate. Therefore, laws against incest can only cause misfortune. May incest not be a sin in the coming society, then A man who does not want incest cannot be unhappy, and a man who desires incest is also happy. Therefore, a society that permits this behavior is more suitable for human beings than a society that treats the same behavior as a crime. poorly considered criminal behavior. If you look at it that way, you There will be a multitude of unhappy souls; if it is allowed, no one will complain.For the man who likes such a common behavior can do it calmly, and the man who is dismissive, who is always indifferent and does not suffer from it, can suffer damage from him as well as from those he has a grudge against. people are compensated.Therefore, in a criminal society, everyone is either very happy, or in a state of carefree life that is not at all uncomfortable.Therefore, in so-called morality, there is nothing good, respectable, and real that can make a person happy.I hope that those who pursue virtue will not be complacent because our social mechanism forces us to worship it! In fact, this is purely a timely and conventional thing.In fact, this worship is so illusory that the virtue worshiped is not the more beautiful for it. " This is the absurd logic of Roden's justification for sinful lust.However, Rosalie is mild in nature and less corrupted.She loathed the horrible things she was forced to do, so readily followed my advice.I longed for her to fulfill the minimum religious duties for which a priest must be present at the time of confession.But Roden absolutely refused to let priests in. He hated them as much as he hated the belief they spread.He could not tolerate his daughter having a priest at all, and it was impossible to take the girl to a priest. Rawdon never allowed his daughter to go out without someone.Therefore, an opportunity must be waited for.During this period, I enlightened the girl.While making her interested in morality, it also made her interested in religion.I revealed to her the sacred teachings and supreme mysteries of religion, and united these two sentiments in her young mind, making them indispensable to her happiness in life. One day, seeing her weeping with remorse, I said to her, "Oh, madam, can a man be so blind as to think he has no better end? Isn't man endowed with the ability to know God Does he understand that he is cared only for the fulfillment of the responsibilities that come with that caring? For if morality is not the basis of the worship of God, what is? God is the model of morality. So many miraculous works Is there any other commandment for the Lord than good deeds? How can we please him if there is no element of good deeds in our hearts? I think that no other reason is needed for devotion to the Supreme Being for the man of affection. ，只使用感激之情产生的理由就行了。让我们享受到这个世界的美妙之处，难道不是他对我们的宠爱吗？我们对此功德岂能不感恩图报?然而，还有一个更重要的理由确认我们普遍承受着义务锁链，那么，我们为什么要拒绝履行它加诸我们的义务，既然这些义务正是可以巩固我们人间幸福的义务?感觉到自己堪当至高无上存在物的垂爱，正是因为我们行美德而获得人间满足，感觉到使自己走上与同类生活在一起的途径，也就是使我们能有把握在此生之后得以在上帝宝座跟前再生的途径，这样的感觉难道不甜美吗？上帝呀！罗萨莉，企图剥夺我们这种愿望的人真是瞎了眼睛！他们被其可悲的情欲所欺骗、所诱惑，宁愿否认永恒真理，也不愿承认使他们得识永恒真理的事情。他们宁愿说'我们受了欺骗'，也不愿承认是自己欺骗自己。一想到即将蒙受的损失，他们下贱的肉体享受就会受到搅乱，他们就觉得灭绝上帝的希望，还不如自行剥夺能使他们获得这种希望的行为那么可怕。但是，当这些暴虐的情欲在他们身上减弱的时候，当纱幕被撕破的时候，当他们腐朽的心灵中再也没有什么能抵消上帝那不可抗拒的声音，噢，罗萨莉，这种残酷的回归自我会是什么样子！随之而来的悔恨将使他们为过去一时盲目的错误而付出多么沉重的代价!这就是为了调整一个人的行为要评判他的状态，我们既不能在他迷醉的时候，也不能在他感情炽热的时候来相信他说的话，而是在他的理智平静、享用他的全部力量、寻找真理、揣测真理、看到真理的时候。那时，我们就会主动渴望认识从前不知的神圣存在物。我们向他祈求，他就会给我们慰藉，我们向他祷告，他就会听取我们的祈祷。那么，为什么我要否认他呢？我为什么不承认他是对幸福必需的存在物呢？我又为什么宁愿跟迷途之人一起说上帝是不存在的，而理智的人却随时可以向我拿出证据，证明这神圣物的存在？和明智的人一起正确思维不比和疯子一起作梦强吗？不过，一切都来自这一初义：既然上帝存在，这个上帝就值得崇拜，而这种崇拜的首要基础，毫无疑问，就是道德。 " 从这些最初的真理，我很容易推论出其他的真理。不信教的罗萨莉很快就成为基督教徒了。可是，我要再说一遍，用什么办法使道德教诲稍稍付诸实际呢?被迫服从于父亲的罗萨莉最多只能表示出厌恶的情绪。面对像罗登这样的男人，这怎能对他构成威胁?他难以对付，我的任何方法对他都毫无用处。不过，虽然我未能把他说服，我自己并没有丝毫动摇。 然而，这样的学校，这样无时不真实存在着的危险使我为罗萨莉瑟瑟发抖，以至于觉得要是能够使她同意逃出这个腐败的家庭，并不是什么罪过。我觉得，把她从乱伦的父亲那里解救出来比起让她仍然处于随时都会遭受危险的境地来，不是什么坏事。我已经略略触及这个问题，也许离成功并不太远了。就在这时，罗萨莉突然从家里消失了，并且我不可能知道她在什么地方。我询问罗登家的两个女人以及罗登本人，他们都让我放心，说她到离十法里外的一位亲戚家里度假去了。我向邻居们打听，他们首先对同一个家里的人提出这样的问题 感到惊讶，随后的答复跟罗登及其女侍的回答一模一样，还说是头天晚上或者她走的当天还见过她，拥抱过她。我到处得到的都是同样的回答。我又问罗登为什么对我隐瞒她要离开，为什么不叫我跟随女主人一同去?罗登说惟一的原因就是为了避免你们之间一个悲痛的离别场面，并且肯定地说我很快就会再见到我喜欢的人。只好听听就是，但要我相信可太难了。怎能设想那么喜欢我的罗萨莉不和我说一声就离开我？根据我对罗登性格的了解，难道没有对这个不幸的姑娘的命运可以担心的地方吗？所以我决心竭尽所能打探罗萨莉的下落，为达此目的，不惜使用任何手段。 第二天一大早，当屋里就剩下我一个人时，我就仔仔细细地到处搜寻。我仿佛听见一处阴暗的地窖里传出呻吟的声音……我走过去，只见一大堆木头堵塞着一道隐蔽的窄门。我清除一切障碍向前走去……又听见里面有动静，我觉得分辨出了那个声音……我竖起耳朵仔细听……我不再怀疑了。 “泰瑞丝！”我终于听见有人叫我，“噢，泰瑞丝，是你吗？”“是我，亲爱的好朋友！……”我听出了罗萨莉的声音，大声嚷道。“是我，是上帝派泰瑞丝来救你了……” 我接二连三向她询问，这令人哀怜的姑娘都来不及一一答复。我终于得知：在她失踪前的几个小时里，罗登的好友和同行——隆博把她的衣服扒光，说是给她全身检查。她父亲命令她和这个隆博干每天他都要求她干的可怕的事情。她反抗，罗登大发雷霆，把她一把揪住，亲自把她送给隆博恣意玩弄。然后，两个朋友长时间地低声交谈，让她一直赤条条地躺在那里，并且不时地过来对她仔细端详，又不断以同样的罪恶方式享用她的肉体，要不就是变着方法虐待她。这样把她折磨了四五个小时，最后罗登对她说他要送她到乡下的一个亲戚家里去，要立即出发，不能告诉泰瑞丝，理由嘛，第二天他亲自到乡下去向她解释，他将很快到乡下与她会合。他向罗萨丽透露，是为她安排婚事，就因为这个缘故，她的好友隆博才来给她检查身体，看看她是否适合做母亲。罗萨莉果真在一个老太婆的带领下出发了，她穿过镇子，一路上还跟几个熟人说过再见。一到黑夜降临，那个领着她的老太婆就把她带回父亲的家里了，她是午夜时分回到家里的。等着她的罗登抓住她，一手捂住她的嘴巴，一声不吭地把她扔进地窖里去了。不过，自从她进了地窖之后，他们对她不错，吃的也挺好。 “我害怕极了！”这个可怜的姑娘又说，“从那时起父亲对我的态度、他说的话、隆博检查之前发生的事情，一切，泰瑞丝，这一切都证明这两个恶魔将把我用于他们的某项实验，你可怜的罗萨丽快没命了!” 我泪如泉涌，我问这个可怜的姑娘是否知道地窖的钥匙。我到处寻找钥匙，也没有找到。我该露面的时间到了，我只能给这个可爱的孩子以安慰。她要我发誓明天还来看她，我答应了，甚至向她保证，要是再也找不到满意的办法，我就立即离开这房子，去向司法机关控告，无论付出多大代价，也要把她从威胁她的可怕的命运中拯救出来。 我走上去。那天晚上隆博和罗登一起吃晚饭。我下决心无论如何要搞清楚我的女主人的命运，便躲在他俩所在的房间隔壁，听到他们的谈话，我更相信他们在酝酿着可怕的计划。 “倘若不观察一个横死的十四五岁的孩子的血管，解剖学就永远达不到最后的完美的境地。只有观察可能获得的那种挛缩，才能够完满地分析非常有趣的这一学科的收获。”罗登说道。 隆博接着说：“处女膜也是这样，所以，一定要用处女做这样的检验。到了青春期能观察到什么呢？什么也观察不到。月经撕破了处女膜，所有的研究都不准确了。您的女儿正符合我们的需要，尽管她已经十五岁了，但是月经还没有来。咱们享用她的方式对她的处女膜也毫无损害，咱们可以随意处理她，我很高兴您终于下了决心。” “我当然下了决心，”罗登又说，“让这些微不足道的考虑阻碍科学的进步是可恨的，伟大的人物能让如此可鄙的锁链囚禁吗？米开朗基罗打算维妙维肖地把耶稣画出来，就把一个年轻人钉在十字架上，摹写他那种垂死痛苦挣扎的模样，他考虑到这是良心上的事情吗？当涉及到我们的学问进步时，同样的方法一样非常必要。我们允许自己这样做，哪有一点罪过?不过是牺牲一人而挽救千百万人，这样的代价又何必犹豫?法律实行的杀人跟我们要干的有什么两样？人们认为如此明智的法律的目的不也是牺牲一人以挽救千百人吗？” “要自学，这是惟一的办法，”隆博说，“在我年轻时候工作过的医院里，我看见做过上千次类似的实验。因为你跟这个小东西有密切的血缘关系，老实说吧，我担心你会犹豫不决。” “什么！就因为她是我女儿？漂亮的理由！”罗登大声叫道，“那么，你认为这种关系在我心中占据什么地位呢？对这样的种子散播的结果，在我看来，除了分量不一样，跟我在寻欢作乐时浪费的没什么不同。我从来没有更看重其中的一种情况。人们有权收回自己所给予的。大地上的任何民族都不反对处置自己的孩子的权利。波斯人、米堤亚人、亚美尼亚人、希腊人都充分行使过这种权利。立法者的典范——利库尔戈斯①制定的法律不仅让父亲对子女享有一切权利，并且甚至可以处死他们不愿抚养或者身有残疾的孩子。蒙昧人有很大一部分在孩子生下来之后就立即把他杀掉。亚洲、非洲和美洲的几乎所有女人都堕胎，并且不受到谴责。库克在南部海域的所有岛屿上重新发现了这种习俗。罗慕路斯②允许杀婴，“十二铜表法”也允许杀婴，直到君士坦丁大帝时代，罗马人都可以遗弃或者杀死自己的孩子而不会受到惩罚。亚里士多德劝人们去犯这种所谓的罪行，斯多葛派的人认为这是值得称赞的行为。在某个明智的帝国之中，不论孩子的年龄传说是古代斯巴达的立法者。——译注②西罗马帝国的最后一位皇帝。——译注大小，父亲要摆脱孩子，只要把孩子交到法官的手里就行了。按照帕提亚的法律，父亲甚至可以杀死到了结婚年龄的儿子、女儿或者兄弟。凯撒发现这种习俗很普遍。《摩西五书》①中的好几个段落均证明，上帝的人民允许杀死子女，而上帝自己也这样要求亚伯拉罕。一位知名的现代人士也说：人们曾经长期相信，帝国的兴盛取决于对子女的奴役，这种看法的基础就是最神圣的理性的原则。什么！一位君主为了自己的利益，自信可以在一天之内牺牲两三万臣民，而一个父亲在他认为合适的时候，却不能主宰自己子女的生命？！多么荒谬！被这样的锁链禁锢的人是多么不合逻辑、多么软弱啊！父亲对子女的权威，这惟一真实的权威，惟一有利于所有他人的权威，是大自然亲自赋予我们的，细心研究它的实行情况随时可以向我们提供范例。彼得大帝丝毫也不怀疑这种权利，他行使这个权利，并且向他的帝国的所有臣民公开宣布说：根据神圣的、人道的法律，父亲拥有处死子女的完全的、绝对的权力，用不着上诉和征求任何人的意见。惟有我们这野蛮的法兰西，由于虚伪而可笑的怜悯，就应该束缚这个权利?不对!”罗登激动异常地接着说：“不，我的朋友，我永远不会明白一个愿意给予生命的父亲为什么不能给予死亡。我们可笑地重视生命的价值，因而就认为生存是最大的财富，就愚蠢地以为剥夺了别人享受的生命就是犯罪.其实，停止生存，或者至少死后的一切，并不是恶，正如生存不是善一样。更确切说，假如万物都不死亡，假如万物都不毁灭，假如自然万物都不再灭亡，假如任何物体分解的各部分只是等着解放以便立刻在新的形式之中重新出现，那①《圣经》的首五卷。 ——译注么，我们对杀人怎么不可以视若等闲呢，我们又怎敢以为它是罪恶呢?因此，哪怕是我一时突发奇想，我还是要认为这种事再简单也不过了，特别是这件事对一门对人类如此有用的技术必不可少时，就更是如此了……当它能够给予我们极大的启发的时候，它就不是坏事了，我的朋友，它也不是罪行了，而是一切行为中最善的、最明智的、最有益的行为，拒绝这种行为才是罪行。 " 隆博听到这样可怕的准则，热情勃发，喊道：“啊！我亲爱的朋友，我同意你的看法，你的智慧令我欣喜若狂，不过，你的冷漠还是使我感到惊讶，我本来以为你爱她呢。” “我！爱女人？……唉！隆博，我原先还以为你了解我呢。我使用她们，只是因为没有更好的。你看见我品尝的那种乐趣我是太喜欢了，因此，我如此顶礼膜拜的这类圣殿对我来说都非常宝贵，为了增添它们的数量，我有时候就把女孩权当男孩。但是只要她们中的一个不幸过于长久地让我沉溺于幻觉，厌恶的情绪就有力地反应出来，我从来只知道一种在这种情况下得到甜蜜满足的方法……你明白我说的意思吧，隆博?法兰西最好淫乐的国王希尔佩里克也是这么想的。①这个小婊子为我的快乐服务已经五年了，是她为了终止我的迷醉付出代价的时候了。” ①参阅一本题为《快活的耶酥会会士》的小册子。——原注饭快吃完了。从这两个盛怒的人的企图、他们的谈话、行为和准备工作，总之根据他们近似疯狂的状态，我非常清楚已经到了刻不容缓的时候了，毁灭不幸的罗萨莉的时间就定在当天晚上。我飞快奔往地窖，决心要是救不出她来，我就去死。 “噢，亲爱的朋友，”我对她大声叫道，“不能再耽搁了……那两个恶魔，……就在今天晚上……他们就要来了……” 说话的同时，我用尽力气打算破门而入。我的晃动使一样东西掉了下来，我伸手一摸，原来是钥匙。我捡了起来，赶紧把门打开。……我拥抱罗萨莉，催促她逃走，还保证跟她一起走，她冲了出去……上帝啊！还是注定了美德必定失败，最温柔的慈悲情操将受到严厉的惩罚：女管家掌着灯，罗登和隆博突然出现了。罗萨莉正要跨出门坎，再走几步就自由了，却被她父亲逮个正着。 “烂货，你要到哪儿去？”罗登在抓住她时大叫一声，与此同时，隆博抓住了我……“啊！” 罗登看着我，又说道，“是这个贱货帮你逃跑的!泰瑞丝，这就是你伟大的道德原则的运用喽!把女儿从父亲身边拐走!” “当然，”我坚定地回答，“当这个父亲野蛮透顶，竟然算计自己的女儿生命的时候，我就应该这样做。” “啊！啊！还搞间谍和引诱，”罗登接着说，“一切最危险的罪行都集中到这个女仆身上！上去，上去，这件案子得审判!” 这两个恶棍把罗萨丽和我拖到上面房间。房门立刻关上。罗登的可怜的女儿被捆在一张床的架子上，然后这两个疯子的全部怒火都向我发来。我遭到最恶毒的漫骂，他们还对我宣布最可怕的判决。恨不得把我活活肢解，来检查我的心脏是怎样跳动的，以对这个部位进行在尸体上无法进行的观察。与此同时，无耻之尤的抚摸、捏掐，不一而足。 “首先，”隆博说，“我认为应该猛烈进攻你那些温和的办法一直碰也不碰的这顽固堡垒。……瞧，它多么美妙!欣赏一下护卫着入口的这两个半月形的东西，它们是那么柔和、是那么白净！从来没有一个处女比她更鲜嫩。” “处女！她差不多是吧!”罗登说，“她就被人强奸过一次，后来什么事情也没有发生过。你把位置让给我一会儿……” 这残暴的淫棍比隆博更加无耻和凶狠，他把偶像任意糟蹋，而不是备加崇奉。那里要是有荆条，肯定要把我猛烈抽打。倒是说要给我鞭笞，只是手头没法找到，只好尽手之所能，令我感到浑身火烫般灼痛。……我越是反抗，就被按得更紧。眼见着他们决心要干出更加严重的勾当，我扑倒在这些刽子手的脚下，我宁愿向他们献出生命来保全我的贞操。