Chapter 22 a cloudy day

Some people say that life is like a poem, simple and ethereal, but meaningful.It is also said that life is like a piece of prose, beautiful and quiet, but durable to read.Others say that life is like a novel, with unpredictable ups and downs, but a beginning and an end.People who say these words are believed to be believers in words, and because they are obsessed with certain feelings, they will worship life as a belief.People of different ages experience life differently.Sometimes, if you take the trouble to tell others how complicated and harsh the world is, it is better to let them plunge into the dust and waves of the world and taste all the flavors of life, and then you will know everything about the weather.

People only let their thoughts flood when they are lonely, and read and read those yellow past events.Nostalgia is a kind of self-admired elegance, and lowering yourself to the dust may not necessarily be a compromise with life.As long as a person's heart is clear and clean, no matter how dangerous the world is, he can be flattered or humiliated.Let the world be full of thousands of things, what we experience is still just like a passing year, and the days we live are just ordinary fireworks. There is such a kind of person who can allow himself to go back and forth between dream and waking lightly, and he can move freely from the world to the world.After all, I still admire Lin Huiyin. She won the love of the world with her beauty, and the admiration of the world with her wisdom, so that those who loved her deeply feel no regrets.It seems that she has never been a stubborn person, and she does not do things willfully, so her life did not leave too many scars.

Xu Zhimo's death was undoubtedly a great pain for Lin Huiyin, but she also comforted herself that death may not be more painful than life, and the final relief may not be happiness or wisdom.In fact, misfortune and good fortune are unpredictable in ninety-two people. After today, no one knows what will be waiting for you and me tomorrow.We often compare that life is like a chess game, and life is like a chess game, every step is frightening, because if the chess is wrong, the whole game will be lost.No one's life will be like flowing clouds and flowing water, walking all the way, there are always gullies that are difficult to fill.

After you pass this hurdle, maybe there is another river waiting for you to cross. In 1932, Lin Huiyin wrote to Hu Shi twice on New Year's Day and the first lunar month.Lin Huiyin mentioned Xu Zhimo the most in her letter. Xu Zhimo's death was a wound in her heart that would never heal. She said that Xu Zhimo gave her a lot of help in personality and knowledge training, which made her fall into the mortal world too much in her life.Because of his existence, she always retains that poetic elegance deep in her heart, and is satisfied with all beautiful feelings. This summer, Lin Huiyin, the summer white lotus, went to Xiangshan again to recuperate.She has been suffering from tuberculosis for several years. In recent years, due to trivial matters, her condition has been repeated severely.Since Xu Zhimo's death, she has been unable to relax her mood, which led to the relapse of her lung disease.While recuperating in Xiangshan, although he was leisurely and quiet, Lin Huiyin's heart was never at peace.Reminiscing about the old days in the mountains, writing quietly, friends often come to chat with her, not very happy.

Xu Zhimo came the most. He accompanied Lin Huiyin countless times to cook tea and chat at night, talking about literature, life and life emotions.Only he can afford Lin Huiyin's most beautiful poetry in the world, and Xu Zhimo's love for her has become an inspiration in her life.Now that such a confidant is suddenly missing, the once elegant days have become dull.Lin Huiyin always felt that Xu Zhimo had met him in his previous life, otherwise he would not be shocked by a soul like him in this life. Maybe we don't know that this seemingly indifferent and pure woman burst into tears for Xu Zhimo's death countless times.Deep in Lin Huiyin's heart, she will never forget the love in Cambridge that year. After all, it was this man who opened the door of her heart and built a dream in her heart.If it weren't for Jiushisan wanting a piece of stability in this world, and not being afraid of the waves of the world of mortals, maybe Lin Huiyin wouldn't turn around soberly.She has always felt guilty towards Xu Zhimo in her heart. After all, Xu Zhimo abandoned Zhang Youyi for her sake, and has been infatuated with her for many years.

Perhaps because of guilt, Xu Zhimo never changed in Lin Huiyin's heart.She didn't feel deeply guilty about Jin Yuelin's silent and gentle dedication to her, but she couldn't let go of Xu Zhimo.She couldn't let go until Xu Zhimo married Lu Xiaoman. What she wanted was his happiness.Xu Zhimo married Lu Xiaoman, and had an earth-shattering love, but also got scars all over his body.Only Lin Huiyin can heal him in this world, so whenever Xu Zhimo feels unhappy, Lin Huiyin is what Xu Zhimo thinks of.Once upon a time, she became a cool and pain-relieving medicine, and when applied to Xu Zhimo's wound, the medicine cured the disease.

If my heart were a lotus flower, A stick of lighted wax sticks out of the middle, Although Yingying only cuts the light, I also want it to be proud of its glory. Not afraid that it is just my personal lotus lamp, Can't see the ups and downs of life before and after—— Floating and sinking, it clings to the waves of the sea of ​​people Light and darkness have become the mystery of its heart. Just a flash of light and a flower— Like a light boat sailing out of the river—— Just like it floats with the waves of fate Waiting for the gust of wind to push into the distance. counted as a passer-by in the universe,

To know the exquisite life and the easy death, This erratic journey is a— That is a beautiful dream. Some people, it's not that they don't love, it's that they really can't afford to love.Lin Huiyin probably couldn't afford to love Xu Zhimo.She needed his favor, but could not return him with the same enthusiasm.She is Qinglian, she cannot burn in the dark night with him.What she wants is to live a long life with a stable man, and she is unwilling to endure any storm.In fact, in this world, many seemingly weak women have unparalleled calmness and strength in their hearts.Lin Huiyin is such a woman, her heart is like a lotus flower, and she will proudly hold out the brilliance of that weak cut of light.

don't throw it away This past passion, Now like water, lightly At the bottom of the cold mountain spring, In the dark night in the pine forest, faint as a sigh, You still have to keep the truth! The same is the moonlight, The same is the lights across the mountain, sky full of stars, only make people invisible, hangs like a dream, You ask the night to go back That sentence - you still have to believe stay in the valley There is that echo! Some people say that this poem was written four years after Xu Zhimo's death.In fact, after Xu Zhimo's death, Lin Huiyin wrote it when he was recuperating in Xiangshan the following year, and it was not published until a few years later.In fact, it doesn't matter when she wrote it, what she expressed was her deep memory of Xu Zhimo.It's just that the enthusiasm of the past is like water flowing eastward, and there is no news.The bright moon is still there, the lights are still there, and people don't know where they have gone.

Life is impermanent, empty and disillusioned, we don't know what we will lose tomorrow, and we don't know what we can keep. This summer, Lin Huiyin lived in Xiangshan and wrote three poems in memory of a man named Xu Zhimo.But she did not delay her beloved career because of this. She and Liang Sicheng went to the Reclining Buddha Temple, Badachu and other places to inspect ancient buildings, and published "Pingjiao Architectural Miscellaneous Records".Later, Lin Huiyin met American scholars Fei Zhengqing and Fei Weimei at a dinner party. There will be countless encounters in a person's life. Some people are scenery that you have seen and forgotten, while others will take root in your heart.Those feelings that cannot be explained are all unreasonable fates, the depth of the relationship is deep, and the relationship has long been known.No matter how you and I practice in the future, we can't change the original appearance.