Chapter 33 Remember the night of May 8th

I know that Yu and Juzi sleep in the east room, Qiqi sleeps in the middle alone, and my aunt sleeps in the west alone. My aunt and Chrysanthemum gave me a gentle impression as a draft, to describe the surprise and anesthesia that my aunt would give me if I could go to her place. I'm getting annoyed. As I said, I can't be crazy about everything.Drink the wine of love, drink as much as you can. If you dare not drink the amount that others drink, you will not be as confused as others when drunk.What use is Qingming to me?But let me strangle my own desires at the best chance. Qingming only gives me the fear of looking forward, and the regret of looking forward.Here, I can't forget that I am no longer a fast-paced figure in the youth team.

one When a new temptation arises in the heart and is tormenting the heart, it is what a man should do to catch up immediately.There is nothing I can do because I have to do it, only things I should not think about but still have to think about. ... A man who bows his head and heart as a captive under love, does he have to accomplish a certain kind of thing on his body to be counted?Slowly infuse feelings into the opponent's heart with the warmth of hands, eyes, words and attitudes from some usual approaching actions, what is better than indulging in an expression of lust?A woman, in the sense of love endowment, what will she end up with?They are both women, so what is the difference between Zhongyi and Juzi?

I put all my feelings towards my aunt on the physical side, but I don't have the courage to look for it in this direction.And what does Chrysanthemum need is different from Auntie?I can't believe it either. This is a game played by young men and women in a large family. It is as fun to play as playing poker with chips to find a prince. Maybe my aunt regards this love as such, and Chrysanthemum is no different.I have found my current idea of ​​love in this way, and it seems that I have gained some strength to move forward. Any kind of god in my heart can never help me change my habit of balancing contradictions.The conclusion I found was just to continue my "desire" with "regret", and let go of the fact that became the "purpose".If I want to do this, although it will cost me an infinite amount of pain in the future, the amount of joy in the present will also give me eternal sweetness, so just do it.I don't. The distance between "knowledge" and "action" really cannot be measured by size.Thoughts can drag my soul into thousands of horses and horses, but I am afraid to open my eyes and see a small needle pierce my skin.

I went back and tried to use all kinds of encouragement and help to lead me back to my exclusive love for my wife, but that couldn't be done.If it is this way or that way, it will not work to imitate a bad prodigal son. The poison of age and wisdom is too deep, I have no way to dispose of me to a safe place! In some fragments of thoughts, when I feel that my grievances are more than enough for me, I share the remaining grievances equally with my aunt and Chrysanthemum.A woman is a devil or a god, I can't tell the difference.In fantasy it is a god, but in reality it is a demon.The ingenuity of heaven's creation of man makes people mix love and fear together, so there are only laughter and tears in the world.The Buddha saw this matter very clearly, so he became a monk.I am willing to follow Gautama and declare war on this great god.