Chapter 11 Amy: Until Death (5) -2

Although the department said that it would conduct a "comprehensive" investigation into Yao Xiaoping's problem, Shi Yan suspected that the department said it would carry out a "front" investigation rather than a "comprehensive" investigation, because the department head is from H City, and his accent is not at all. There is no "QU" sound, and "qian" and "quan" are not distinguished when speaking, "qian" is "qian", and "quan" is also "money". The reason she thinks this way is that the department has never asked her to investigate, how can she be regarded as an insider?Although it can't be regarded as the front-stage person of the incident, but the middle stage can be counted, right?The department didn't even find her to talk to her, so how could it be called a "comprehensive investigation"?It can only be "pre-investigation".

However, Yao Xiaoping still regards her as a key person, and has set up an offensive and defensive alliance. Whenever she has a chance, she will tell her: "Shi, now you are the key person who determines my future. My success and failure are all tied to you— -" The statement of "key person" made her feel a heavy burden on her shoulders, but the statement of "tie on you" made her feel funny, as if Yao Xiaoping's success and failure were tied to her belt, because this "Tie" reminded her of Yao Xiaoping's words when describing her husband: "I always want to tie me on his waistband".

Yao Xiaoping said: "As long as you don't confess me, they will have nothing to do with me, because strictness will definitely not admit it; Excellence has black hearts and black guts, but there is no black evidence—" "But I don't have black evidence either!" "I've told you everything, why don't you have black evidence? Anyway, only you and Zhuoyue know about my rigor, but you don't know as much about Zhuoyue. As long as you can stand it, the department will There's nothing I can do about it." "Don't worry," Shi Yan thought of the word "hold on", and asked worriedly, "What do you think they will—interrogate me? This is a new society, don't they dare to treat me——"

"Punishment is definitely not possible, but there are things in the world that are more severe than punishment—" "For example?" "For example, future, awareness, conscience, integrity, anyway, the Communist Party has a very good set of psychological tactics—" "Aren't you a Communist Party?" "It is precisely because I am the Communist Party that I know that the Communist Party is very powerful—" Shi Yan felt that the CCP's mind-boggling tricks were not very powerful, they only affected her future, but she was ready to go back to the "dongdongguai", what else could they do to her?Should she be punished?Thinking of the word "punishment", she was a little worried. If she was punished, her parents would be very sad. It's fine if she didn't get into a good university, and the whole punishment would be on her head. , Then there is another point, at least it means that she was admitted to A University and B University. If the punishment of the entire C Provincial Teachers College, how can they hold their heads up?

She asked worriedly: "Do you think they will give me a punishment?" "What are they punishing you for? They're not investigating you." "But if they think I'm not telling the truth, will they—" Yao Xiaoping said broadly: "Don't worry, you are not a party member, so how can they expel you from the party? Besides, you are not involved in a love triangle, even if everything about me is finally found out, You don’t have to be afraid, just insist on ‘I just don’t know’—” Shi Yan nodded, but her heart was still a little flustered. Yao Xiaoping explained: "This kind of thing needs to be full of confidence. First of all, you must think in your heart that there is nothing wrong with it. If you lack confidence, people will see it at a glance. If you cheat, you will be exposed. .To be honest, I don’t worry about anyone else, but you, because you can’t stand others’ bullying and deceit. If I ruin it this time, it will definitely be ruined by you—”

What she said made Shi Yan very depressed, why did Yao Xiaoping just think that she was a coward and a fool?Can the rigor withstand the bluffing and deceit of others?She still believes that Zhuoyou can stand it, because Zhuojiao himself is the kind of person who "wants to be deep in the rivers and lakes, so let him keep silent", but isn't rigor also a bit stupid?She pulled out rigor to accompany her: "How can you say that? Can rigor be so deceitful?" "He is the person involved, and the department might not ask him to investigate at all. Even if he did, even if he told us about the incident, it would be fine, because I can say that he was the one who failed to pursue me, so he beat me up—"

Shi Yan was speechless.She didn't know how Yao Xiaoping could be so calm. If it was her, she would be extremely depressed when she thought that her beloved would betray her.Just imagine, even the person you love the most betrays you at critical moments, so what is there to do in life?But she felt that Yao Xiaoping looked at the problem differently from her. Yao Xiaoping seemed to treat these things as technical problems, thinking about how to deal with them rigorously if they were exposed, and how to deal with them if they were not exposed, rather than feelings The upper body is not harmed.

She couldn't help asking: "If Yan Jing betrayed you, what would you do? Do you still-love him?" "I still have the mind to talk about these illusory things now? I just want to deal with this matter—" Yao Xiaoping was very busy during that time, and even Shi Yan was very busy, because Yao Xiaoping didn't want to go alone to meet Yan Jing, for fear of being seen by the people in the department, but she also needed to meet with Yan Jing, so she either sent Shi Yan to run errands or drag Go with Shi Yan.I don't know if it was Yao Xiaoping's influence on the strict side, or Yao Xiaoping's arrangement. They also brought a "oil bottle" every time, and sometimes several, and everyone gathered in a certain dormitory to play cards, and Yao Xiaoping and Yan Jing took the time to go to a certain room to discuss the matter of the investigation, which made Shi Yan suspect that someone in that room was being investigated by the department when he saw someone playing cards in a dormitory.

But Shi Yan felt that Yao Xiaoping's behavior was a bit of a cover-up. The more people who knew about it, the more potential witnesses there would be, and the greater the possibility of being investigated by the department.But Yao Xiaoping said it didn't matter, saying that the group of people in the department were simple-minded people who only knew that the affair happened in private, and didn't know that it could happen in broad daylight and in full view of everyone. Shi Yan reminded her twice, but she didn't bother to remind her later, firstly because nothing happened, and secondly because Yao Xiaoping couldn't listen to what she said.

Once, it may be a coincidence, the male and female coaches and lieutenants seemed to be matched in pairs. Yao Xiaoping took Shi Yan there as usual, while the rigorous side brought Excellence.Yao Xiaoping didn't make any fuss, but Shi Yan spent a lot of time trying to figure out Yao Zhuo's current diplomatic relations and policies. Is it because Yao Xiaoping and Zhuoyue have turned their battles into friendships, or is it because this foolish boy, Yan Jing, didn't know what to do and turned Yao Xiaoping's Here comes the sworn enemy. That time they met at Zhuo Liang's residence, the four of them exchanged some greetings, Yao Xiaoping and Yan Yan went to Zhuo Liang's bedroom to discuss the investigation, leaving only Shi Yan and Zhuo Liang staying in the living room.Shi Yan felt very uncomfortable, but Zhuo Liang seemed to be fine, sitting leisurely on the sofa watching TV, like a loyal old dog, quietly accompanying his master.

Shi Yan was very afraid of confronting people but not talking. She always felt that it was abnormal and embarrassing, so she took the initiative to strike up a conversation and said, "Ms. Zhuo—are those manuscripts finished?" She said this completely for the sake of striking up a conversation, and just wanted to break the silence, but Zhuoyou added the second half of the sentence that she didn't have at all, saying: "I have already contacted those people, and they will wait for you Helping with staying in school—" She knew that his answer was not an irrelevant question, because he said that he had to wait for the manuscript to be finished before he could deal with her retention in school. Now that he had done the matter of her retention in school, it meant that the manuscript was finished, and it was considered an answer to her question. question.But what he made up for the reading made her a little angry, because she didn't mean to ask about the detention at all when she asked like that, and he answered like this, it seemed that he thought she was asking about the manuscript on the surface, but she was actually asking about the detention. Does it mean she is fake? She stammered and explained, "How do you—so—understand my words? I'm just—asking about your manuscript—whether it's finished—I haven't—asking about retention—" He smiled inscrutablely: "I can't talk about the topics you didn't ask?" "You—" She couldn't think of any words to refute him. If she said she didn't ask him to help her with the detention, he would definitely say, "I can't do what you didn't ask me to do?" She was about to pull down and tell him he should respect her wishes, but she heard him say, "If I can't talk about things you didn't ask, then we're going to miss out on a lot—good stuff—" " This sentence shocked her. I don't know if she was shocked by the poetic meaning of this statement, or by the deep meaning hidden in the words, or the poetic meaning is the deep meaning?She was about to dare to ask "what a beautiful thing", when she heard him say, "I forgot this is from some poor poet's poor poem--" She knew that he was redeeming, and in order to redeem, he did not hesitate to say "crazy" twice in a sentence, which made her laugh and said with a smile, "Is it the poem of your crappy poet?" He honestly admitted: "Well, I was afraid you would laugh when I said it, so I pushed it to the poor poet—" She had never seen him so frank, and found that he was actually very cute when he was frank, but she remembered that he also said "frankly" that time, "It must be because I like you", and he was called "Your daughter" "Child" pulled her back, and felt that she couldn't be fooled by him. If she took what he just said seriously, he would probably say another dishonest sentence and put her into "you girls", making it appear that she was Passionate. But this time he didn't go back, but whispered: "Do you think I didn't respect your wishes on the issue of your staying in school?" She was a little at a loss when he asked her about the idea, and replied hastily: "It's not about respect or disrespect, but—" She really didn't know what other words she could use besides "respect", so she had to let This "but" hangs in the clouds for a long time. He said in a low voice but quickly: "Actually, I also know that it's not good to act like this, but I think you are now—affected by many factors, and cannot objectively measure the long-term value of staying in school. It has a strong—idealistic color—so—” He didn't finish the sentence, and he said it very theoretically, such as "objective measurement", "long-term value", "idealism", etc., she may not use it in spoken English in her whole life, whether she uses it in writing or not It was a problem, but she felt that she understood him and was moved, so she said softly, "I know—" "It's good to know—" Shi Yan originally wanted to ask about Yao Xiaoping's stay in school, but she was a little reluctant to break the current atmosphere. She didn't want to use mundane questions to spoil this idealistic conversation, and drove back a person who had finally shown his true colors in Lushan. Go inside his inscrutable shell. But Zhuo Zhuo himself turned to Yao Xiaoping's matter, and he pointed to the bedroom: "You may have listened to her and thought it was me——sabotaging her stay in school, but—" Seeing him struggling to talk about this matter, she knew that Yao Xiaoping had dragged him into a mud pit this time. Otherwise, a noble and upright intellectual like him might feel ashamed even talking about this kind of thing, let alone talk about it. Needless to say do this kind of thing.She comforted, "You don't need to say it, I never believed her words—" She saw Zhuozhuo looking at her gratefully, as if thanking her for saving his car, and thanking her for her understanding, she felt a little contemptuous of herself, why did she become so fake now?Obviously, at least 50% of the time, she believed Yao Xiaoping's words at least 50% of the time, but now speaking of it, it really seemed as if she had never believed it.It seems that it is quite easy for people to lie to themselves, as long as they have enough confidence as Yao Xiaoping said.But how did she remember that someone said that "the most difficult thing for a person is to lie to himself"?It seems that the man is very lack of confidence. The idealistic conversation that day basically ended there, and they chatted a little later, but it was very trivial. It gave her the feeling that the words of both of them came from their mouths, at most, from their heads, not from their heads. From the heart.She didn't know how to get back to the state of conversing with her heart just now, she tried several times, but Zhuo Liang couldn't keep up, so it was difficult for her to try again, and she would be pouring out her heart by herself. They walked back to the dormitory by themselves that day, because Yao Xiaoping said that it is not good for people to see her with Yan Jing, so they did not let them see her off.Walking on the road, Shi Yan asked: "Have you found out who told the secret?" "No, have you checked it out? Did Zhuoyue tell you today? Who did he say?" She was a little discouraged: "I didn't find out. I was asking you. I saw that rigor brought Excellence. I thought you——I already knew that he wasn't the one who informed—" "How would I know? Am I still investigating? What were you talking about in the living room just now? I can see that your face is full of silly expressions of falling in love—is it because Excellence has captured your heart?" ?” She didn't know who captured whose heart, and she didn't want to tell Yao Xiaoping about the "heart-to-heart dialogue" between her and Zhuoyue, for fear that Yao would mock them both unceremoniously.She turned the topic to Yao Xiaoping: "Did Zhuoyou help you stay in school?" "I don't know, anyway, I don't rely on him. My strict father is helping me contact the High School Attached to the Teachers College, and I will go there to give a trial lecture the day after tomorrow—" "Then you're ready to give up staying in?" "It's not that I gave up on staying, it's that Liu has abandoned me—" "Have you been notified by the department?" "Not yet, but a fool can guess it. Even if they don't find out any problems with me, they will think it is a trouble to keep me. I will try to stay in City D first, and I will try to go to graduate school like you in the future. You What about the boyfriend from University A? Don’t blow him off, so that he can help us get review materials over there.” This time, Shi Yan was smarter and didn't tell Yao Xiaoping or Huang Hai about the "heart talk" between her and Zhuoyue. She knew that the two of them were natural enemies like ladybugs and aphids.She learned this metaphor from elementary school general knowledge class. Now she has forgotten who is good and who is bad, ladybug and aphid, and only remembers that they are natural enemies.If Huang Hai and Yao Xiaoping, the two giants --- ladybugs or aphids --- know that she has a small bud of love in her heart, they will definitely vilify Joyo and analyze his motives in a bad direction. That was tantamount to pouring a few spoonfuls of manure on the tender buds in her heart. Speaking of manure, she remembered a sentence she learned in general knowledge class: A crop is a flower, and it depends entirely on the fertilizer.But this does not mean that her metaphor just now is wrong. If the seedling of love has grown quite strong, then the big dung can be in charge.But in this situation, Ai Ya has just shown her tip. If she is poured dung all over her head, wouldn't she be destroyed in the bud? Although in order to protect the buds of love in her heart, she held back and didn't tell the two --- ladybugs or aphids, but Excellence didn't seem to want to water the buds in her heart. There is no connection between them.Zhuo Liang didn't come to contact her, she definitely wouldn't take the initiative to contact Zhuo Liang, and Yao Xiaoping didn't engage in any couple dates anymore, many times even Shi Yan didn't call her, just slipped out alone, I don't know Is it because the white terror has been lifted, or has the strict relationship entered a stage where outsiders are not welcome. Shi Yan felt a little bit abandoned by others. Don't look at the time when Yao Xiaoping always dragged her up, she had a lot of complaints in her heart, but when Yao Xiaoping really didn't come to bother her, she felt very lonely again. Wanting to talk to someone about the buds in my heart is like a young man who has just learned how to grow crops and is eager to ask an experienced farmer for help. He wants to know whether the buds in his heart have any hope of growing into a strong crop. But Yao Xiaoping didn't seem to be in the mood to ask about Shi Yan at all during that time. She even asked about her and Zhuoyue on the way back that time, and then she didn't mention it again. She only reported her own news there, and the department investigated today. Who, who will be investigated by the department tomorrow, what is the result of the investigation, etc. The report is very on the sidelines, very calm, it sounds like it is talking about other people's affairs, and it seems that the head of the special case team knows the investigation process like the palm of his hand. Every time Yao Xiaoping finished her report, she always added a sentence: "Shi, it's your turn next, you must hold on, my future depends on you—" In the end, the department didn't come to Shi Yan to investigate. She wrote the lie in her heart several times in vain, and rehearsed the scene of "being tried" several times in vain in her mind.If I use that energy on the right path, I am afraid that even if I don't win the National Creation Award, I should still be admitted to the Beijing Film Academy. Finally, one day, Yao Xiaoping came to report to her the results of the "previous investigation" in the department: "Shi, my problem has been clarified. I have nothing to do with Yan Jing. It's all the nonsense of the complainant, without evidence. Department I've done a full investigation, and I'm clean." Yao Xiaoping's face was full of joy after her grievance was redressed, as if she herself hadn't been able to figure out whether she and Yan Jing were "okay" or "nothing".Seeing Yao Xiaoping's face full of sincere gratitude for the department's investigation, Shi Yan somehow remembered a shop that made pennants outside the school gate, and felt that if Yao Xiaoping hadn't been stingy with a few dollars, she would definitely order a big pennant for the department Li, wrote: "Never let a bad person go, and never wrong a good person." She could completely imagine Yao Xiaoping's attitude and expression when she was being interrogated in the department. She must be sincere and innocent. Deep down, he believed that he had never done anything, so with enough confidence, it would be considered good if he didn't blow the lie detector over. This made Shi Yan admire Yao Xiaoping from the bottom up. If she hadn't considered that she would never need these skills for the rest of her life, she would have bowed to Yao's sect and applied to be Yao Xiaoping's closed disciple. Yao Xiaoping does not seem to be the kind of person who only cares about herself and does not care about others. She is only "worrying about the future world".Yao Xiaoping finished her own business, and started to care about Shi Yan's affairs: "I've settled the matter of going to the attached middle school, how about you? How about your staying in the department? Do you want me to talk to Zhuoyue?" Shi Yan hurriedly stopped: "Forget it, forget it, if you want to talk about it, I can say it myself—" "Then you remember to say it, otherwise, if you don't keep it, I will feel that I got you in trouble—" Shi Yan said to look for Zhuoyue, but in fact, she couldn't take this face, and she couldn't open the mouth.She felt that he had already said that he helped her find those people last time, which meant that he was doing this and it was effective.If she still ran to find him, wouldn't it be a rent-demanding debt?At least they don't believe in other people's abilities. But she still wanted to go to him, not to ask him about staying behind, but simply to talk to him, because the seedling in her heart was dying of thirst and urgently needed him to water it.She really wanted to hear him express his feelings, and she thought that scene was very moving, because Zhuo Liang is not the kind of person who expresses his feelings easily, and he can defeat other people's ten points by expressing a little, and he always expresses and covers up a sentence, it is really A very funny thing, which makes her feel very cute. Later, Yao Xiaoping asked about staying in school several times, but Shi Yan was still too embarrassed to take the initiative to find Zhuoyou.But one day, Yao Xiaoping came to her urgently and said, "It's over! What's going on? I heard that kid Li Shu stayed with us—" Shi Yan didn't realize the relationship between this matter and herself at first, so she quickly comforted her and said, "Don't be sad about this matter, haven't you already decided to go to the attached middle school?" "Of course I decided to go to the attached middle school, I'm talking about you!" "Me? What's wrong with me?" "You still don't know what's wrong with you? Isn't your excellence helping you with the retention? Why did that kid Li Shu jump out from the slanting thorn and snatch him away?" "Excellence is helping me with the retention? I thought—but—" "But what? I told you to go to Zhuoyue, but if you don't go, it's all right now. I didn't keep it, and you didn't. It's too cheap for Li Shu—" Shi Yan instinctively wanted to defend herself, but she couldn't figure out how to defend herself. Maybe she was really to blame. If she had gone to find Excellence earlier, maybe Li Shu would not have been kept in the department.But she didn't want to do a self-criticism either, so she stammered: "But---maybe the department has long---" Yao Xiaoping suddenly stood there without moving. She didn't say a word, and she didn't go on the road. She stood there like a clay sculpture and wood carving, staring at something nearby.Shi Yan followed Yao Xiaoping's line of sight and saw nothing but a pile of rubbish.She asked puzzledly, "What's the matter? Is there gold in the garbage dump?" Yao Xiaoping raised a finger and made a gesture to stop her from speaking, with a look of steaming hot on her face, as if there were so many customers that the biscuits in her oven had to be sold while baking: "Wait a minute, Let me think about it---I think this matter---it's Joyo's tricks again---otherwise---why didn't he keep you in the department?" Shi Yan remembered an idiom: If you want to commit a crime, there is no reason to worry about it.She was a little conflicted and said, "Why does this have something to do with Excellence again?" "Why can't we have anything to do with it? This proves that the matter between me and Jing Jing was indeed stabbed into the department by him, with the purpose of getting me away---" Shi Yan was convinced by Yao Xiaoping's far-fetched idea, snorted, and said, "What does this have to do with Excellence? It can only show that Li Shu --- played tricks in the dark --- why don't you suspect that it was Li Shu who reported to the department? Are you serious about it?" "Li Shu may have evil intentions and courage, but he has no evidence of fraud, because he doesn't know about me and strictness—" "Didn't you say that the department also said that the person who made the report had no evidence?" "But at least he knows it's rigorous—" Yao Xiaoping said eloquently, "I can say with certainty that the whole thing is manipulated by Excellence. He tried every means to get me out for your sake—" "But the department didn't keep me, but kept Li Shu. Why don't you believe that Excellence has nothing to do with this matter?" "Only a fool like you would think this way. Zhuoyou is ten times more cunning than you, and of course he is far behind me. I made it clear to him that time, and he knew that if he really kept you in the department Now, he will be hit by me, and his conspiracy will be exposed, so he won't do this--" This seems to be getting worse and worse. Previously, it was just that Zhuozhuo had sabotaged Yao Xiaoping’s affairs in order to keep her in the department. Now it seems that he has become more cunning and ruthless, and Zhuozhuo even sacrificed her in order to clean himself up. future.But she didn't know how to refute Yao Xiaoping, she just felt uncomfortable, as if Yao Xiaoping was stomping on the tender seedling in her heart. Yao Xiaoping may not have seen the tender seedling in her heart at all, or if she saw it, she just regarded it as a weed, and continued to step on it: "This excellence is worse than I imagined, at least ten times worse. I knew it was like this , I shouldn't have withdrawn from the competition, I should have stayed in the department and let him be exposed---" Seeing Yao Xiaoping going back to her own affairs, Shi Yan felt less uncomfortable. After all, Yao Xiaoping was just planning for herself.Yao Xiaoping herself made a mistake in judgment on the issue of staying in the department, thinking that it was Joyo who was playing tricks inside, so she evacuated automatically, but Li Shu took advantage of it, so she felt unhappy.It is understandable to be unhappy, but talking nonsense without finding the right target, and blaming Excellence is not so realistic. Yao Xiaoping said: "This time I was played by that kid Zhuo Zhuo, and he killed three birds with one stone. Damn, it's really small and not a gentleman, and non-toxic is not a husband. My loss is that I am too gentleman---" " Shi Yan only felt goose bumps, and Yao Xiaoping was still complaining that she was too gentleman?I'm afraid it's the "gentleman on the beam", right?Her lord smiled disregarding the villain, and said: "It's a good thing I didn't go to Zhuoyue, otherwise, it would have added pressure to him in vain. It is very likely that he already knew that the help was not going to work, otherwise why didn't he come to him during this time?" What about the message?" A tenderness surged in her heart, knowing that for a person like him who is very concerned about face, if he said to help but failed, he must feel very uncomfortable. No wonder he didn't come to her during this period of time. How is he doing well? Looking for her?Could it be that he came here to apologize and say that he was incompetent, so it didn't help?She kind of wanted to say to him: Don't feel bad, it's not that you write academic articles, and if you don't publish them, it can be said that your level is limited. Isn't this obviously a matter of the network?Is it okay to network is a scandal?Don’t those of us who don’t have a connection at all live a good life? She decided to go to Zhuo Zhuo. In the past, because he was helping her, it was difficult for her to go to him, for fear that he would think she was using him.But it's different now, it has been proved that his help is useless, she has no interest in going to him, she just cares about him, so just take it as a way to thank him for helping her.She said in a tone that was not negotiable: "I think I should go and talk to him, what do you think?" Yao Xiaoping didn't nod or shake her head, she just asked, "What are you talking about?" "Talk—I don't know what to talk about, just play it by ear—" "What's the matter? What's the matter? Don't let him put you into bed--" Shi Yan felt that Yao Xiaoping was getting more and more disgusted as she talked more, so she stretched her face by an inch and said, "I'm talking serious to you, you're always joking---" "Am I kidding you? I'm also talking serious. If you ran to him with gratitude in your heart and admiration on your face, he must have seen it at a glance, so he didn't take advantage of the situation." , make yourself more upright and more pitiful, and let you be fooled by him? This excellence, I can say that I have seen through his shit intestines. If you don’t believe me, I can put my words here: Wait for you to tell When he was staying with Li Shu, if he didn't pretend to be innocent, I would hang up my Yao character upside down---" "Why does it have to be fake? Can't it be real?" Yao Xiaoping sighed: "This is the reason why a third-rate liar like Zhuoyou can still thrive, that is, there are too many people in the world who are as stupid as you, and there are too few people with sharp eyes like me---" Shi Yan said stubbornly: "I don't understand why everyone should be like you --- always think of people in a bad way --- I think this way of judging people --- not good ---" "Did I 'always'? Did I think the worst about you? Which one of my analysis of excellence is incorrect? If you can find one, I'll put my Yao character---" "Hang upside down---" Yao Xiaoping smiled "Puchi": "Even you have learned it? It seems that I hang upside down a little too many times. But it's a pity that you only learned one 'hanging upside down', and you didn't learn my way of thinking. There is no way for this. Yes, some people are born with insight into human nature, and some people are born to be deceived. Didn’t you, Huang Hai, also say that excellence is ‘not a good kind’? It means that I think of excellence in this way, and it’s not an exclusive statement—” Now that it's come to this point, Shi Yan feels that there is no tender seedling to cherish, so she decides to tell Huang Hai about it, to see what kind of shit he has to splash.Before making the phone call, she said in her heart: If Huang Hai didn't say anything bad about Excellence this time, then I'll forgive him for the bad things he said before; That shows that he is too prejudiced, remember to avoid contacting him in the future. I don't know if it's because she didn't want to have a falling out with Huang Hai subconsciously, but when Shi Yan told him about Li Shu's stay on the phone, she didn't mention either Zhuoyou or Yao Xiaoping.If you don't mention Excellence, you're afraid you'll irritate Huang Hai and make him throw the shit out of him again; if you don't mention Yao Xiaoping, you're afraid you'll remind Huang Hai and make him follow suit. She felt that Huang Hai didn't like Excellence so much, mainly because he was jealous, and he jumped at the mention of Excellence, but there was no theoretical basis, let alone factual basis.Yao Xiaoping was different. Although she distorted the facts every time, at least she still distorted some facts.If Yao Xiaoping's distorted facts were added to Huang Hai's jealousy, it would be a good show. So she downplayed it as much as possible, only talked about Li Shu's staying in the family, and repeatedly stated that she didn't want to stay in the family for a long time, and she was ready to go back to "Dongdongguai", and her parents had already helped her implement it. Yes, as long as she has worked for two years, the school will let her take the postgraduate entrance examination. Unexpectedly, Huang Hai, a thin mud that can't support the wall, once heard the news of Li Shu's stay, he poured manure on Excellence, and the concentration and odor of the manure were exactly the same as Yao Xiaoping's: "I think this is because of Excellence. Mischief, he originally wanted to drive Yao Xiaoping away so that you could stay with him, but Yao Xiaoping exposed his trick in person that time, so he had no choice but to change his strategy--" She didn't expect Huang Hai to live up to her expectations so much, and said angrily: "Why do you speak exactly like Yao Xiaoping? Can't you have your own opinion?" "Yao Xiaoping thinks so too? That means --- it makes sense --" "As long as what Yao Xiaoping said makes sense?" "I didn't mean that, I meant---" Huang Hai didn't seem to know how to round up his words. "Why do you always look down on everyone?" "Us? Who are you talking about?" "You and Yao Xiaoping." Since Huang Hai was so unbearable, Shi Yan had nothing to hide, and shook out all the dung that Yao Xiaoping spilled. After Huang Hai finished listening, he didn't seem to dare to agree with Yao Xiaoping publicly, but he still defended himself by saying: "I didn't see everyone as bad, I was just talking about excellence--" This justification was exactly the same as Yao Xiaoping's, and it really made her so angry that she almost suspected that Huang Hai and Yao Xiaoping had passed their anger a long time ago.She hated iron and said: "I deliberately didn't mention Zhuoyou's name today, and I didn't tell you what Yao Xiaoping said, just to see who you are--- who--- I didn't expect you to--- Still-" She didn't continue, because she didn't know what words to use, but Huang Hai asked seriously: "I didn't expect what's wrong with me?" Seeing that he seemed to be talking harshly, she thought she didn't dare to speak out, so she said bluntly: "I didn't expect you to be so--- despicable--- despicable---" She spoke very irrationally and confidently, the last word "despicable" was at least several decibels lower than the previous one, and she almost swallowed it.But Huang Hai must have heard it, and said a little angrily: "I'm despicable? I really don't know who is despicable!" "You call me mean?" "I didn't say you were despicable, I said excellence. He thought everything was done perfectly, but he was just a third-rate liar as Yao Xiaoping said. Sit there and wait for him to cheat—” She felt that Huang Hai was pointing directly at her, and said dissatisfiedly, "If you want to say that you understand psychology, just say that you understand psychology. Why use others as stepping stones?" Huang Hai was obviously puzzled by Monk Zhang Er, and it took him a long time to say, "Who did I use as a stepping stone?" "You know it yourself!" The second monk of the Yellow Sea must have grown into the eighth monk, not to mention he couldn't figure it out, he couldn't even touch his feet. He touched the dirt bag under the feet of the eighth monk for a while, and then he choked out a sentence: "You- --Why are you so angry?" She thought, you don't even know why I'm angry, I think your psychology is in vain.She said angrily, "Do you think I can't understand what you're saying? Don't think of yourself as too smart, thinking that you're great just because you've been admitted to University A---" Huang Hai stopped talking, so did Shi Yan, and said in her heart, I'll give you three minutes, if you still don't talk, don't blame me for hanging up. She didn't know how many minutes had passed before she heard Huang Hai say softly, "Shi Yan'er, I don't want to say anything more, because you're already - fascinated by him, you can't listen to Yao Xiaoping's words, but you can't listen to mine. The more you listen, the more disgusted you become. Have you talked to your parents? See what they think? They are all people with life experience, and they must be more accurate than --- we are more accurate--" She thought, don't pull my parents out, no matter what my parents think of Excellence, they will never agree to you being their son-in-law.She hasn't actually talked about Zhuo Liang with her parents, because she has nothing to do with Zhuo Liang, but she lied and said: "My parents are not like you --- think of people in a bad way--" There was a bit of panic in Huang Hai's words: "Have you talked to your parents about you---you and Excellence?" She didn't dare to lie too concretely, so she had no choice but to keep silent. Huang Hai seemed to see that she was lying: "I don't believe that your parents would---can't see that Excellence is a despicable person---maybe you didn't tell them---too detailed---" "How I talk to my parents is my business, but my parents will never think of everyone as bad as you --" Huang Hai was silent again, she didn't give him three minutes this time, and immediately said: "You don't have anything to say? Then I'll hang up--" Huang Hai shouted: "Don't hang up---" but he didn't say anything. 她又说一遍：“你没什么说的，我就挂电话了，我还有很多事情要办-- ” 黄海好像被她催慌了，赶快说：“石燕儿，我真的不知道该说什么，只有一句话：爱情就像高考，考了个坏学校，并不说明你水平不够，有时只是运气不好--- 但自己多少--- 还是有一点责任的--- ” 她惊呆了，她不知道他为什么扯到高考上去了，但是她听得出来，他是在说她高考不顺还是得怪她自己，是她自己不细心才会做漏题的。这么多年以来，她一直以为他是唯一一个能在高考上理解她的人，不是同情她，而是理解她。想不到他跟别的人也没什么两样，还是觉得她罪有应得。那他这些年显得那么理解她，就只能是装的了。 她冷冷地说：“我刚才说了你卑鄙，还在后悔，现在看来也没什么要后悔的，因为你-- 的确卑-- 鄙--! ” 这一次，她的“卑鄙”二字说得一样高亢，连她自己都觉得象两把利剑，直插黄海的心脏。 但她没听到“扑通”一声，看来黄海没有被她两把剑刺倒下，还站在那里。她听见他以一种无可奈何的声调说：“石燕儿，我已经无能为力了，你自己的事，你自己看着办吧，无论怎样，我都会--- 祝福你--- 幸福--- ” 他说完这句很俗套的话，就挂了电话，她听见电话里传出断线的声音，万分后悔自己没抢在他前面把电话挂掉。 后来黄海就没再打电话来了，也不写信了。她没想到会是这么个结果，她事前设想过多种结果，有黄海生气摔了电话跑掉的，也有她自己生气摔了电话跑掉的，甚至有两人前嫌尽释，达成共同认识的，但就是没想到会是这样。她想到过的最坏的结果就是黄海继续粪泼卓越，而她则不再跟他保持这种经常的电话联系了，反证她马上就回“洞洞拐”去了，也不会再跟卓越有什么瓜葛，黄海也就没什么要泼粪的了。 但她没想过黄海会从她生活里彻底消失掉，她一直以为他会骂不还口，打不还手地爱她的。她回想那天打电话的过程，觉得她那天的气势也太足了点。以前黄海泼卓越大粪的时候，她虽然不高兴，有时也顶两句，但从来没说过黄海卑鄙，也没发那么大脾气。她不知道自己是怎么了，可能是因为李树留系已经洗刷了卓越，说明不是卓越在中间捣鬼了，但黄海还在那里粪泼卓越，就太过分了，所以她才生那么大气。 她知道“卑鄙”两个字刺痛了黄海，她也知道黄海还够不上“卑鄙”的程度，顶多算个嫉妒，但她不想主动打电话向他认错，心想如果他赶着打一个电话过来，我就对他说个“对不起，我不该说你卑鄙”，但他没赶着打电话过来，而且再也不打电话了，这说明他真的生气了，这让她很难过。 姚小萍似乎觉察到了什么，关心地问：“怎么啦？我看你这几天失魂落魄的，是不是跟卓越闹矛盾了？” “跟他闹什么矛盾？见都没见过他--- ” 姚小萍很吃惊：“还没见过？那你留校的事到底怎么样了？都快毕业了，你还没把留校的事落实下来？这是你自己的事，你怎么能这么不上心？” 她很烦，但不知道在烦什么，好像见谁烦谁。她有点不客气地说：“既然你知道是我自己的事，你管那么多闲事干什么？” “看来真是闹矛盾了，把气都撒我头上来了。”姚小萍也不生气，谆谆教诲说，“闹矛盾归闹矛盾，但不要因为闹矛盾就把自己留校的事耽误了。现在先别跟他那么较真，但也别让他占你便宜，把他控制在一定的距离内，让他勤勤恳恳地帮你把留校的事搞好。等一切都搞好了，你想怎么发他脾气就怎么发他脾气--- ” 石燕真不知道姚小萍把她当什么人了，没好气地说：“你别自作聪明了，我根本没跟卓越闹矛盾--- ” “噢？那就好。那还有谁？黄海？你跟黄海闹矛盾了？” 石燕正有满肚子的冤枉没处诉说，现在终于有了个可以倒苦水的地方，便连本带利地把那次跟黄海的电话纠纷向姚小萍汇报了。 姚小萍安慰说：“你说他卑鄙是过分了一点，谁听了都会生气，但是你也别把这当个坏事，也许这对他对你都有好处。你不把话说绝一点，他就老是心存指望，而你又不可能真的爱上他，那何必呢？这样脚踏两只船，不光对黄海不公平，对你自己也没好处--- ” 石燕没想到姚小萍居然还教训起她别脚踏两只船来了，真是滑天下之大稽! 这世界上谁来教训她两句“不要脚踏两只船”，她都能接受，唯独这个姚小萍，自己正在脚踏两只船，她没教训姚小萍就已经算客气的了，姚小萍居然还来教训她! 她很不客气地说：“我没脚踏两只船，因为他们两个谁都不是我的男朋友，你那才叫脚踏两只船，有了丈夫，还缠着人家严谨不放--- ” 姚小萍呵呵大笑：“你是不是一直都想说这句话？” 她被姚小萍笑糊涂了：“哪句话？” “就是说我脚踏两只船啊？” 她有点尴尬：“你不是脚踏两只船吗？” “我是脚踏两只船，你说了我也不会生气，但是你不能说我缠着严谨，因为不是我缠他，而是我爱他，他也爱我。我是有个丈夫，但我从来就不爱我的丈夫，他也不爱我，或者说他谁也不爱，他不懂爱，只知道利用他父亲的权势追逐年轻漂亮的女老师。他娶我，是因为我比那个学校所有的女老师都漂亮，他娶了我，在那一方就很有面子，如果现在学校来一个更漂亮的，他肯定就要去追那一个了。但黄海跟我丈夫不同，他是真的喜欢你的--- ” 姚小萍说到这里，似乎就后悔了，赶快纠正说：“我还是那句话，除非你对黄海的脸是一点也不在乎了，不然的话，你跟他在一起不会幸福的--- ” 但石燕揪住那句话不放：“你觉得他是真的喜欢我的？那他怎么这几天都不给我打电话来？” “既然他不打电话来，那说明他对你的喜欢还是没强过他对自己的喜欢，毕竟自尊心占了上风--- ” 石燕已经能觉出姚小萍在试图收回说过的话了，她也不再追究，也许真的跟姚小萍说的那样，虽然不该说黄海卑鄙，但既然已经说了，也就不用后悔了，覆水难收，后悔也没用，只能从好的方面去想，也许这真的对黄海有好处，可以让他彻底对她绝望，去开始一段新的恋情。 但她有点怀疑黄海会有新的恋情，连她这么了解他的人，都没办法克服他那张脸，那还有哪个女孩能克服？如果不克服那张脸，婚姻又怎么能幸福？做他的爱人，在外面要听人家的风言风语，回到家还要看那张脸，说不定还要听那张脸上的那张嘴的抱怨，那种日子，恐怕再多的爱情也被磨损了。 她自我安慰了一番，感觉好多了，不再为说了黄海“卑鄙”内疚了，也不再为黄海逃跑遗憾了，反而有种自救救人的高尚感和自豪感。