Chapter 23 Hou Cuicui said: Who will leave the silver dollars to (1)

After the accident in Nanyang, the family did not tell Bian Deren and his wife the news, fearing that they would not be able to bear it at the age of eighty.But grandma Hou Cuicui and granddaughter Bian Yinxie are inseparable.After the accident in Nanyang, Hou Cuicui was full of thoughts all day long. Suddenly one day, she came out of the bathroom, in a trance, fell down accidentally, and suffered a cerebral hemorrhage.Sent to the hospital, his life was saved, but he became paralyzed.The family members did not immediately tell Bian Yinxie the news of grandma's paralysis, thinking that she was immersed in the pain of Nanyang's death and could not add more pain to her.After waking up, Hou Cuicui asked with a premonition, how is her granddaughter Bian Yinxie doing in Beijing?Bian Jinsuo and his wife endured the heartache, forced a smile, and said: It's all right.Hou Cuicui calmed down.

After leaving the hospital, Hou Cuicui could only lie on the bed at home all day.A few years ago, the sons felt that their parents were getting old, so they hired a full-time nanny for their home, and the nanny lived at home, and Bian Deren and his wife were on call whenever they needed.At that time, the husband and wife felt that there was nothing wrong with their bodies and bones. They did what they could do by themselves, such as washing dishes, cleaning tables, and cooking. The nannies will do something; they don't have any special needs for the nannies to serve them, and it is actually easy for the nannies to serve them.Now, Hou Cuicui is lying on the bed, and the nanny is much more frequent and busy than before. In addition to doing daily housework, she also has to serve Hou Cuicui, massage her, turn her over, feed her, and serve her. Shit side urine.Bian Deren didn't have the energy or interest to do any work anymore. He devoted all his energy and energy to accompanying Hou Cuicui, talking with her, watching TV with her, scratching her itch, comforting her, and he didn't want to leave even a single step ; Just being with her is a great effort.Children and grandchildren, come to see Hou Cuicui when you have time, and replace Bian Deren occasionally.They didn't spend much time at all. Most of the time, there were only Bian Deren, Hou Cuicui and the nanny in the room.The nanny is an outsider, just doing her job mechanically and professionally, a little lacking in emotion.But Bian Deren and Hou Cuicui are one, and neither can leave the other; Bian Deren's company with Hou Cuicui is to share his life.

The homes of Bian Deren and Hou Cuicui are no longer the bungalows they used to live in. Ten years ago, when the bungalows were to be demolished, the unit gave Bian Deren a two-bedroom apartment of more than 50 square meters. They lived in the bungalow for 35 years. move out.When they moved out, they were reluctant. Living in a bungalow, they felt peaceful, comfortable, open, and free, while the high-rise was narrow and closed, which made them somewhat depressed.Beyond depression is loss. Moving out of the bungalow means that a period of history in the first half of their lives is over. After one period is over, the end of another period is not far away; they are prepared, but they don't want to prepare.Now that Hou Cuicui fell on the bed, the premonition that they will end is getting stronger and stronger.

Hou Cuicui was lying on the bed, and her life was different from before.In the past, every Sunday, a family of sons or grandchildren would come to Bian Deren’s home to visit the old couple. They had many sons and grandchildren, and either one would come or that would come. It will be empty and someone will always come.They are a common people's family, without red tape, rules and regulations, some are random and natural, and they never have any special requirements for their children and grandchildren. Children and grandchildren, whoever wants to come, can come, and they don't care if they don't.When someone came, they entertained them cheerfully, without pretending to be elders.Seeing them is the law that children and grandchildren consciously develop.Formed a law, they will act in accordance with the law.On Saturdays, the old couple are as happy as they are on a holiday. They take their cloth bags and walk to the vegetable market to buy some good vegetables, meat, fish and chicken, in order to welcome the arrival of their children and grandchildren; They are treated like guests.On the second day, the vegetables and meat they bought came in handy. They or their children and grandchildren were in charge, and the dinner table was full of dishes. Then, they sat down at the table and ate lively.Sometimes, people from several families meet together.When they lived in a bungalow, they had a large table that could seat more than a dozen people. In summer, as long as it was not windy or rainy, they would set it up in the middle of the yard, and they would not be afraid of the sun. The top of the table was covered by grape racks. , the sunlight squeezed through the gaps, and sprinkled on the table bit by bit, like a kind of decoration.Sitting in such a leisurely environment for dinner, everyone's mood is refreshing.After moving to the building, there was no room for the original big table, and if there were many people, they would go out to eat.When going out to eat, the bill is settled by the children and grandchildren. If they want to pay, the children will naturally refuse, and they will stop them if they say anything.Except for Sundays, when it comes to big festivals, such as Spring Festival, National Day, New Year's Day, and May Day, then the four generations of their family will gather together once, which is called a "big gathering".When I lived in a one-story house, the place for the big gathering was at the home of the elder Bian Deren. Two tables were set up in the yard or divided into two rooms, and nearly thirty people ate together, like a small-scale banquet. They are members of a family, they are natural, familiar, kind, and at ease with each other, they can say whatever they want, they are not taboo, and they are very lively.After moving to the building, Bian Deren’s family had no room for two big tables, so the big party was changed to a restaurant, and the expenses were collected by his sons, and whoever had the money would pay more; later, Bian Jinrong opened Hezhong Restaurant , the party is fixed to "Hezhong".No matter where the gathering is, whether it is a big gathering or a small gathering, at that time, Hou Cuicui is always too busy to concentrate on eating her own food. She will stand up from time to time to add a piece of meat to this person and a piece of fish to that person, for fear of the children I can't eat well; or, when I see someone running out of rice in the bowl, I have to add some more to him, always showing the attitude of the elders and maternal care.

Now that Hou Cuicui is lying on the bed, it is impossible to have such a dinner together.Without her sitting in the middle, when everyone gets together, they will not sit together to eat unconsciously.The elder, Hou Cuicui, was lying on the bed. They couldn't bear to sit and eat them, so she asked her to watch.When I got home, I didn't sit and eat together anymore, and I'm afraid the big gathering outside would be cancelled.The disappearance of such a scene, for Bian Deren and his wife, means that their era is coming to an end.The gathering actually revolved around them. They are a big tree, and the children are the branches of the tree. They can still surround the big tree, because the tree is still standing upright; the big tree When it falls down, those branches will separate from the big tree, grow up one by one, and become big trees one by one.It seems that they have gone out independently, but in fact there is a blood that leads them, and they will always be relatives.

Thinking that such a result is not far away, they will inevitably talk about "funeral affairs". The "funeral matter" is not aimed at any one of them, it is calculated by the two of them together.Although there must be a sequence between them going and leaving, they always regard them as one, since the day they were together.In their view, if one of them went, the other would have gone, and if they were alive, they would be living in a shell.It was this long-standing belief in the unity of the two that made them follow closely every step of the way. No one pulled away from the other's pace, and unexpectedly let go of the other prematurely.Their emotions possess and flow with each other, and what is one person's is the other person's; when one person is gone, the energy in the other person will be weak and exhausted.Therefore, they agreed that whoever went first, they would explain all the funeral affairs clearly.

In fact, they have already prepared for the "funeral event", and they have been preparing for it a few years ago.At that time, Hou Cuicui was seventy-five years old, and Bian Deren was eighty years old.The first thing they prepared was their shrouds, which they prepared quietly by themselves, without letting their children and grandchildren know.Because, if the children and grandchildren know, they will not be told to "prematurely" prepare.They mentioned it at a big gathering before, and the children and grandchildren all objected, saying that it was unlucky, and what was not there would become what is. Everyone was a little sad because of their association, and the atmosphere was a little gloomy for a while.Afterwards, they no longer mentioned this matter in front of their children and grandchildren, because they did not want to affect their mood.But they knew in their hearts that preparations were all too well deserved.Compared with many older people, their preparations are considered late.Only old people like them know that at this point, even if there is no disease on the surface, nothing can be guaranteed. No one knows what the "parts" in their bodies are like when they get old. It works. If you don't move, you will stop when you say stop, and there will be no expectations.They prepared in advance, the province got to the front, and asked the children and grandchildren to rush for them.

The shroud is ready, and other funeral affairs can be carried out slowly.Those burials are not like shrouds, they have to be made into shape first.Those funeral matters depend on their words, one decision, what to say, what to do, and they will come out at that time.There is a process for leaving, and there will be time when the announcement is made.Those funerals, counting and counting, are in two aspects, one is their exhortations to the younger generations, which is their last words; and the other is the distribution of their inheritance.In these two aspects, they actually made preparations earlier. When they were free, when talking about their years, they naturally talked about the future without them.They will be gone in the future, but they still miss their younger generations.They are single-headed and have not received much guidance by precepts and deeds. They are only awakening based on the accumulation of life experience they have come to; they are ordinary civilians, without much culture, and they have no advanced theories to talk about; They are a family of common people, so they don't expect all the younger generations to be prosperous, but only hope that all of them can live a good life.They hope that all the younger generations will live in peace, live a happy life, be safe and happy, and have a happy family; among the younger generations, they can unite and help each other.Their wishes are plain and simple, which is actually the standard of "living well" they have always believed in. They have said it many times in their lives year after year, but the younger generations still ignore it. They are beyond the reach of the whip, the sons have grown up long ago, and they are different and have their own characteristics. Now, the sons are all "old people", and they may listen to them as if they were listening to children. of.How different are the years and months in which they accumulated their life experience than the years and months in which they are now?In the current age, their principles may have become antiques, and if they are put there, they will be useless.But if they want to fulfill their elders' obligations, they can only exhort them to death.Speaking of this, Bian Deren would think of what the widower said back then, "There are so many ways to live, and you can't survive for a lifetime". He thought that he and Hou Cuicui lived according to their understanding throughout their lives, which is a consistent way of living; In a lifetime, even a few lifetimes, one person will not have all kinds of ways to live.After thinking about it, I suddenly realized that the various ways of living mentioned by the widower are actually the different ways of living of the offspring. They have been passed down from generation to generation, and different from generation to generation, there are various ways of living.

In addition, they also have a wish for themselves, that is, after they are all gone, they hope that their sons will buy them a cemetery and bury their ashes together.They want to love each other forever and depend on each other forever. Their inheritance, so trivial to say the least, consisted of their houses and what little savings they had.These are nothing difficult to deal with.They have agreed a long time ago that until the announcement is made, they will give to those who need it, and they will not engage in egalitarianism.The announced time is the originally agreed day for whoever will leave first.

In addition, there is another thing to leave behind, which is not considered an inheritance but is more important than an inheritance, and that is the silver dollar engraved with the equal sign when Bian Deren bought Hou Cuicui.They regard this silver dollar as a "family heirloom", and they have been hesitant to give it to whom in the future.Speaking of silver dollars, every time Hou Cuicui would ask Bian Deren with difficulty, who will leave the silver dollars to?And Bian Deren also had no idea, saying that he would think about this in the future.This thinking has not been figured out until now.It stands to reason that the family heirloom should be left to the eldest son, but they feel that their silver dollars represent the history of their love and dependence, and are the testimony and token of their love.Since it is closely related to "being in love", it should be reserved for those who are good at "being in love". In this regard, as long as it is "standard", they will break the tradition, regardless of the length, the five sons can be given to anyone .However, they counted and calculated, but they have not realized that anyone has ever "loved" to the same degree as them.Although the eldest son Bian Jinsuo and his daughter-in-law Wang Xiangping have been living a good life, they did not come together because of their own "love" but because of their parents' matchmaking and Wang Xiangping's helpless combination. The son has never felt it before, and it is difficult for him to understand it clearly when he is given silver dollars; the second son Bian Jinli and the third son Bian Jinwu both married hastily, and they can't get along; the fourth son Bian Jinguo worked hard to find Qiu Li's, if it weren't for the fact that Qiu Li was in a bad situation at the time, the ending would be hard to say, and they wouldn't be considered the result of "falling in love"; the fifth son, Bian Jinrong, was indifferent from the moment he talked to him, and he and Quan Chan must have nothing to do with each other. love" heart.They weighed it over and over again, and it was against their original intention to give it to anyone. They thought that if they couldn't make a decision by then, they would tell their sons and bury the silver dollars in their tombs with them.

In addition, apart from funeral affairs, they still have one of the biggest concerns, which is their granddaughter Bian Yinxuan who is far away in Beijing. Their natural partiality for Bian Yinxuan has not changed until now.In particular, Bian Yinxuan had not been married year after year, which made them worry even more.They couldn't imagine what kind of life Bian Yinxie lived as a famous actor, but from their point of view, as long as he reached the age without getting married, no matter how beautiful he was, his life would be gloomy; think she is alone.Their only hope for Bian Yinhe is that she and Nanyang get married sooner.This wish had been expressed long ago, and Bian Yinxie had already put it in his heart, and they could be considered to be at peace. Now, they just waited to see the ending. After the death, Bian Deren and Hou Cuicui felt relaxed, and there was nothing left to pass the time every day.Their words are getting less and less, and they feel that talking too much will consume their remaining energy; they like to feel the passage of time every minute and every second quietly; at the same time, they are also feeling with their hearts. Love and cherish the days when each other exists.Their hearts have entered the countdown to their life, flustered and calm, flustered because they are reluctant, and calm because leaving is inevitable in life. Hou Cuicui originally thought that she would not survive the New Year, but unexpectedly, the Spring Festival was approaching before she knew it.When the Spring Festival came, the granddaughter Bian Yinkai, who they cared about the most, came back.Bian Yinkai also had a deep affection for grandma. Seeing that grandma was paralyzed, she was so sad that she held her hand and burst into tears.Grandma tried her best to be cheerful, and comforted her granddaughter, saying that it's natural for people to get old, and it's nothing.Bian Yinhe said in a child's tone: No, no, grandma shouldn't be like this. Before Bian Yinxuan came back, Bian Jinsuo and his wife told their parents that their mother had just been paralyzed, because they lied to her from the beginning because they were afraid of affecting Bian Yinxuan's work.Hou Cuicui and Bian Deren said they knew about it, and said that their son and daughter-in-law thought right and made good arrangements, and they didn't want Bian Yinxie to miss grandma and affect his work.The matter about Nanyang was hidden from his grandparents, Bian Yinxie knew about it a long time ago, so when he saw his grandparents, of course it was assumed that Nanyang was still there.Grandma asked, why didn't Nanyang come with her?Bian Yinhe made mental preparations and said that Nanyang had gone to work in the United States.Grandma sighed and said: During the Chinese New Year, I still have to work!Bian Yinxie burst into tears, and grandma said distressedly: Do you miss him?Bian Yinxi nodded and said yes.Grandma sighed again and said: I miss him too!Bian Yinxi couldn't hold back even more, threw herself into grandma's arms, and burst into tears.The grandma stretched out her trembling and wrinkled hands lovingly, comforted her granddaughter weakly, and whispered softly: You like him so much, and grandma also likes him very much. When he came back from the United States, grandma told him to marry him soon. you.As she said that, Hou Cuicui's old and slack eyelids closed together, and a tear flowed down from the corner of her eyes. Grandma really likes Nanyang. After Bian Yinkai and Nanyang became friends, they experienced three Spring Festivals. One Spring Festival was spent by Bian Yinkai back to Shandong with Nanyang, and Nanyang followed Bian Yinkai to Lanzhou for the other two Spring Festivals.When grandma saw Nanyang, she liked Nanyang very much at first sight. On the one hand, she is good-looking. Nanyang's behavior, conversation, and style are all very attractive to grandma, not only grandma, but also grandpa, parents and everyone in the family. , I have met Nanyang, and they all say that he is outstanding, and Bian Yinxie and him are a match made in heaven. After Bian Yinkai came back, at night, his grandfather gave up his seat to Bian Yinxuan. Bian Yinxuan wanted to spend more time with his grandma during his limited days in Lanzhou.At night, when Bian Yinxie was lying beside her, grandma couldn't help talking about Nanyang, and every little thing about Nanyang in Lanzhou was good, and she missed it.Speaking of it, grandma said in a reminding tone: "Yin Xie, Nanyang is so rare, don't break up with him easily."When grandma reminded her like this, she always remembered the matter of breaking up with Bai Yaming proposed by Bian Yinxi back then.Bian Yinxie said heartbroken: How come, I can't love him enough in my whole life.As long as Nanyang was mentioned, Bian Yinhe could not control his heartache, and tears flowed out.At that time, if she could carry grandma on her back, she would carry it, and if she couldn't, her grandma's comforting words would always be "you miss him"!Bian Yinxie just said "yes". One night, Bian Yinhe dreamed of Nanyang, and called Nanyang's name repeatedly in the dream. Grandma woke up, but did not wake her up. In an instant, she felt that her granddaughter and Nanyang were deeply in love with each other.After that, she suddenly thought, how the symbolic meaning of the silver dollar fits her granddaughter and Nanyang, and it is perfect to leave it to her granddaughter.The next day, Hou Cuicui told Bian Deren her idea, asking if it was appropriate to do so?Bian Deren agreed again and again, saying that since they originally wanted to break the tradition and not talk about the long time, there is nothing wrong with breaking it further and passing it down across generations; as long as they are people with the surname "Bian", men and women are the same.In this way, they decided that in the future, the silver dollar will be left to the granddaughter Bian Yinkai. After the Spring Festival, Bian Yinkai set off for Beijing.Before leaving, grandma repeatedly explained that they should get married as soon as Nanyang came back from the United States, otherwise, she might not be able to wait.Bian Yinxi forced a smile on his face and comforted his grandma, saying that Nanyang is coming back soon, and grandma will definitely wait for it.Grandma listened, opened her mouth and smiled, showing her broken teeth, like a child who has just teethed.Bian Yinxuan looked at it, feeling terribly sad.I shouted in my heart: What should I dedicate to grandma!Bian Yinxie thought that grandma could at least have another Spring Festival. However, after half a year, Hou Cuicui died of heart failure.At that time, Bian Yinhe was participating in the filming of a TV series, and her parents temporarily hid it from her for fear of affecting her filming. The day Hou Cuicui passed away was at noon.Before, she was breathing weakly and unconscious. After her children and grandchildren surrounded her, Bian Deren held her hand tightly.Hou Cuicui's eyelids fluctuated a few times, and then opened, and it turned out to be bright, this is a moment of reflection.What she seemed to see was that Bian Yinhe and Nanyang were standing in front of her, she couldn't help laughing, and showed her incomplete teeth again, with dimples printed on the bones.Then, she stopped laughing and frowned slightly. Why didn't she see her husband Bian Deren?She suddenly remembered that her brother Deren was on his way to pick her up at this time, oh, she had to go back to the widower's shack and wait for Derenge.Her eyes closed slowly.Her body was light and fluttering, and was slowly lifted by the wind, and she went with the wind.She felt her body getting lighter and lighter, and along the reversed time and space, she was transmuting to the past little by little.She is the great-grandmother of the children; she is the grandma of the children; she is the mother of the children; she is the daughter-in-law who slept next to Brother Deren without a sedan chair; she is the younger sister who calls Bian Deren his brother all day long.In the end, she returned to the widower's dark shack, lay quietly on the bed, and waited for Bian Deren, who bought her with a silver dollar, and she just called her brother, to pick her up and find their way of life.The surroundings were dark and quiet, and she thought: If my brother is not here, let's go to sleep peacefully.She fell asleep steadily, sinking into darkness and tranquility; deep, like the moon, serene and peaceful. After Hou Cuicui left, Bian Deren was in a trance every day, doing everything in a dull manner.He wanted to eat, and when he saw what was in the refrigerator, he took it out and wanted to eat it like a child; what he wanted to do, he didn't call a nanny, he just made it, the water would flow all over the floor, and he took the bowl and chopsticks , the hand is not working, dropped the bowl, dropped the chopsticks, always made a mess.He also often has memory confusion, pouring soy sauce and salt into the dishes cooked by the nanny; pouring cold water into the thermos bottle after connecting the boiling kettle; he will water the pots of flowers and plants on the balcony several times a day The water is called good flowers and plants, and the pots are retting to death.If he doesn't do this, he just doesn't know what to do, sitting or standing, not knowing what to look at, not knowing where to put his hands.Half of his body went with Hou Cuicui, and the remaining half served as the whole body, so naturally it was useless. Within two months, Bian Deren lay down.After lying down for a few days, he suffered from heart failure.The moment he closed his eyes, he felt that he was running in the dark with all his might, towards the widower's shack, to find Cui Cui who was waiting for him.He thought, Cui Cui must be waiting impatiently. He led Cui Cui, jumped out of a big curtain, and walked into the world of the two of them.They left, and the curtain closed behind them.The curtain opened again, and the people on stage were all juniors.Life begins one scene after another, and the protagonists appear in rotation from generation to generation.