Chapter 11 Red Buddha Running at Night---About Interesting【Chapter 8】

chapter eight The content of this chapter has been influenced by Kafka.The personality of this senior master is very similar to that of the author. one This part of the book is about Qiubeard, a square-headed and square-minded man.Very thick, with a pair of cylindrical eyes, that is to say, his eyeballs bulge out, as if he had hyperthyroidism.He was born in China and later lived in Fusang, and people couldn't tell that he was not a local stranger, because his appearance was very common.Fusang is a place near the sea, and there are many small pine trees growing on the rocky shore.It looks like it just grew out, but it is actually hundreds of years old.The bearded man lives in a palace made of wooden boards, eats sashimi, and misses Luoyang City infinitely.I miss the food in Yang Su's mansion, and I miss Hong Fu.All the houses in Yang Su's house are built of stone, and the windows are inlaid with transparent mica sheets, which look very bright from the inside, but look like the eyeballs of a cataract patient from the outside.Qiubeard could no longer live in such a house, because in order to build this kind of house in Fusang, all the people had to be driven to the mountains to dig rocks and collect mica.The girls in Fusang are not as good-looking as Hong Fu, and they don't know how to dress up. They always put a lot of powder on their faces, and they have to dust off their clothes for a long time after making out.This was especially sad for him afterwards.He was allergic to the powder used by Fuso women, and later got asthma.And the more he panted, the more powder those people wanted.

When the bearded man first arrived in Fusang, he had a square head and a square head, but later he changed his appearance.Later, his eyes stopped protruding, his asthma also healed, and he no longer missed the food of Hong Fu and Yang Fu, but it was a long process.It is a long process from birth to death.Qiuran Gong didn't have hyperthyroidism and asthma at first, but later he suffered from these two diseases at the same time.Later, both diseases were cured.This is the story that will be told in this chapter. My own life is like this: when I was in my twenties, I responded to Chairman Mao’s call to dig up dirt, but I didn’t make a name for myself; Look, but also did not see a trick.If you have proved Fermat in your forties, you should not be able to publish for the rest of your life according to the usual rules, just like an old maid who cannot get married at this age, but she is lucky enough to become a celebrity.Of course, this experience is not representative.The typical one is to scrape the soil for a lifetime and be a pervert for a lifetime.My experience is quite similar to that of the bearded man, who was supposed to be a pervert in Luoyang City all his life, but then ran outside Luoyang City (he was also in his forties at the time).So a generation of famous heroes fell.

When Qiubeard was not depraved, he always sat on the ground and chewed his shoes, experiencing life from the bitter taste of new hemp.At this time, his eyes were the same as those of normal people, neither convex nor concave, and he never panted.The sun was shining on his face, the sweat was streaming into his eyes, and even a peerless beauty like Hong Fu passing by his eyes couldn't shake him.Only in the middle of the night when the sexual desire is unbearable, do you draw your sword and go out to act righteously and vent your desire.The adulterers and prostitutes killed by him are always scattered and need to be carefully sorted before they can be separated and put into two baskets.No one wants to do this kind of sorting work, but they have to, because men and women are different, and they cannot be mixed together after death.For Qiubeard, it is enough to occasionally feel the coolness of Hongfu when she walks by and smell her body.A woman with long hair like this and snowy skin is just for appreciation.When he gets old in the future, the chiefs will give him a nurse who has run out of milk as his wife.That kind of woman has a lot of wrinkles on her face. Although her teeth have not fallen out, the gaps between her teeth are so wide that her gums look like an old comb; fish), or an elephant's ears, if you can flap, you can try to fly into the sky.The bosses will also assign him a room, which is a small room separated from the barn, just like the box house I used to live in, and this woman will sew in the dark.The two of them mate and have babies in this tiny house.It doesn't take the bosses to remind him, Qiubeard knows that this is the so-called happy life.But before he lived in the barn, he would have to live in the sun for many years, chewing on his shoes and looking at Hongfu's slender back.I don't know what you think in this situation, anyway, Qiubeard sees this as a test for him by the bosses.

Before the bearded man fell, Hongfu was just a particularly beautiful plant to him, for example, a big willow tree with thousands of strands of black hair like wicker; or she was a quiet stream, The thousands of strands of blue silk are the aquatic plants floating in the current.Although he also had the idea of ​​lying on the ground when Hongfu passed by, looking at her legs from under the skirt, or peeking in through her neckline while teaching sword skills, but he was not always like that.Nuo Da, a city of Luoyang, would go wrong, let alone a bearded man.In general, he had always known who he was—a man in red thongs, tanned by the sun on the seashore, a Fuso fisherman who cleaned the sea of ​​rays, Remove the salt and dry it in the sun; or a man in a grass skirt, who was soaked black and white in the dark forest, this man is an elephant slave in Malaysia, and washes the ears of elephants every day; Or someone like me who rubs her wrinkled breasts with both hands every night, squints her presbyopic eyes to see the lines she made when she slept on her stomach, and she also said that if she has breast cancer and cannot be diagnosed early, she will be alone ask.All in all, if this is the case, we are all the same people, and there is nothing wrong with it.He didn't want to hold a woman like Hongfu Rui in his arms at all.That is to say, at that time he was able to stand the test.But after the Fall, everything changes.

Now we can talk about Qiubeang Gong staring at Li Jing and Hong Fushao on the road.What kind of road is that? It can be said to be a mud ditch winding between fields and grasslands.If you complain about bad roads, I can answer you: Who told you to go out?If you say: I have something urgent to go out, the answer is: I can't control it.If an official or a person with status goes out, there will be a whole army of road builders ahead of him to build the road, and the roads where he does not pass are still very bad.Immediately after he passed, the road broke down again.So complaining about bad roads is better than complaining about being a commoner.If you are not an ordinary person, you will think: I can get what I want, why should there be a road.And if you are an ordinary person, you will think: I want to have nothing, not just a way!

Li Weigong, Mrs. Weigong, and Qiubeard, who later became the king of Fusang, all walked the road in this way when they were young-when they encountered something to eat, for example, there was green wheat on the side of the road, they would grab it and rub it. Remove the husk and put it in your mouth; sleep in any place you encounter, such as haystacks, woods, cow pens, donkey sheds; drink whatever water you encounter, and walk in the fields Fork off, it must lead to a spring.Of course, it is too nice to say that it is a spring.It is a puddle in a wheat field, and the surrounding wheat has been trampled to nothing, like a threshing field.Roads are like this, they always lead to places where there is food, drink and shelter.But that's not good news for those who live on the side of the road.As a result, there are gully ditches everywhere on the road, clusters of jujube thorns, cow pens and donkey sheds are full of human excrement, and there is cow excrement and even human excrement in the spring water.When pedestrians passed the village, others would stare at them, and sometimes they would become the target of children's bullet bows.Nevertheless, in this life, a person must become a pedestrian several times, otherwise he cannot be considered an adult.Chekhov has been to Sakhalin Island, and Su Dongpo has also been to Hainan Island.

Qiuran Gong walked on the road with Li Jing and Hong Fu, but in fact there was more than one road.In addition to the muddy and water-splashed driveway, there are countless roads walked by people, like a bundle of untwisted wool, which is tied into a single strand when it reaches a rough place, and spreads out into one piece when it reaches an open place, trampling young plants, When you get to the river, the pedestrian path diverges from the driveway. The car goes to the ferry or bridge, but the people go to a secluded place and disappear by the river.This can save money on ferrying or crossing bridges, or you may drown in the river, but for people without money, the latter is nothing to fear.These are green rivers with green reeds growing on the banks.It was a river that was silted everywhere and the water flowed slowly, so the water inside was not clear but green, but after the red brushed down, the river water seemed to be a little clearer.The reeds on the riverside are as wide as kelp, which can be picked to make zongzi.There was a lot of Malan grass growing by the water, so I even had a belt to bind the brown rice, but I didn't know where to find glutinous rice.Li Jing and Hong Fu found a place where no one was around, took off their clothes and went into the water. The bearded man saw them among the reeds on the bank and thought they were so proud of them, so he couldn't help being jealous.Later, whenever and wherever he thought of this incident, he would feel jealous, even though Hong Fu and Li Jing were not always proud.No one can always be proud all their lives.

Many years ago, there was such a river where I jumped in line, and it was full of such reed leaves; when I got to the river, I thought of the problem of zongzi.According to my opinion, as long as you have glutinous rice, you can eat sticky rice without eating zongzi.But in this regard, what I said is always not counted.It is not easy to say and count.Suppose there is a natural river out in the open, and no one cares about it—that is, without piling revetments on the banks, planting willows, embankments, etc.—it will take its bends between the fields.Over time, in some places, it was as wide as a racecourse, and the river diverged there, turning into dozens of small streams flowing over the beach, and in other places forming a green river bend, with green reeds on both sides—— The reed leaves look like banana leaves.Now when I recall the roads and rivers at that time, I think of topology.Of all the lessons I've learned, this is the one that makes me dizziest.

Later, the bearded man grew older as he lived, and his concubines died, so he picked up the ashes with his grandson-in-law.At this time, his eyes were protruding again, and his trachea was wheezing again.At this time, he often thought of Li Jing and Hong Fu, but by this time, not only Li Jing was dead, but Hong Fu was also dead.He always thought of that green river.Hongfu was in such a river. Her hair was cut short, but it seemed to grow back in the water, and it became one with the water.Seen from the back, there is not only Hongfu's hair in the water, but also her buttocks, round like a dolphin's head.Then she turned over and stood up in the waist-deep water, revealing her snow-white body with two light red nipples.From my point of view, this kind of scene is nothing more than a beautiful sight, but it is very different from the view of Qiubeard.As far as I know, he ran away from Luoyang City, and originally planned to kill Duke Wei and replace him.So at this moment, the sword around his waist rattled in its sheath.As someone who studies the history of science and technology, I know that the sword will not ring unless it encounters a changing magnetic field, but this is a symbolic statement.The unspoken statement is that he had an erection.If he jumped out, no one would be able to save Duke Wei.This guy is almost the same size horizontally and vertically, and weighs more than 200 kilograms. Although Wei Gong is a fit man, he is absolutely no match for him.Wei Gong was naked in the water, and he couldn't pretend to be a ghost if he wanted to.What's more, he was defenseless, crawled out of the water, and hugged Hongfu from behind.And Hong Fu took a sip of water in his mouth, turned around and sprayed him all over the face.Later, Hongfu found a sunny beach, lay there, wiped the water from her pubic hair, spread her legs apart, and Li Jing lay down on it.Seeing this scene, the curly bearded man trembled all over, as if suffering from malaria, which in my opinion is really worthless.In fact, it was at that time that he got hyperthyroidism and bronchitis.I can't imagine myself doing the same.That's why I can't be the leader.

The bearded man saw Hong Fu and Li Jing making love by the river.At that time, he was trembling all over, and he was about to fall apart.There are many reasons for this trembling, for example, recalling that I wanted to take a peek at Hongfu in the Yang Mansion but did not dare, and secretly wrapped her left hair around her body and so on.By this time, every man will come to the conclusion that he has been a pervert for the first half of his life.For example, Xiao Sun and I came to this conclusion after having sex for the first time, because at that time I felt that what I vented was not normal sexual desire, but abnormal sexual desire.But with that comes another conclusion, that it's all over and I'm a normal man from now on.Mr. Qiubeard didn't come to such a conclusion. Ever since he opened his eyes by the river that day, his abnormality has intensified.He could have jumped out to kill Li Jing and rape Hong Fu; but he didn't have the courage.All he dared to do was to come to Fusang and rape his legitimate eldest and younger wives.Although the breasts of those people are not rays and elephant ears, they are not much different after all.After doing this kind of thing too much, if he meets a girl with round breasts, he will become impotent.If one draws a conclusion on this matter, it would be that there is something wrong with Mr. Qiubeard.

two Qiuran Gong went to Fusang to fight a duel with every famous swordsman in the area.In this respect he has real ability.This is not only because of his superb swordsmanship, but also because he is serious about everything he does, like a boss.Every time before a sword fight, he would squint his eyes (when he squinted, he looked like a gecko, the eyes of that animal are a huge spherical organ, but the eyeballs are very small, like an observatory), looked at the opponent for a long time, and then said : You have a short build with a stubby torso.I will cut you horizontally in three.The Fusang swordsman said: We all look like this!How dare you insult the Yamato nation!Eight grids!Dancing with his sword, he rushed over, and was chopped into three pieces in a blink of an eye.This is how we feel today when we hear foreigners say that our human rights situation is not good.If the opponent is good at playing the game, they can still perform miracles.For example, in a duel on a hill, the upper body falls on the hill, and the parts below the waist can rush down the hill.If the bearded man sees a person with a good figure, he will say: You have a long figure and a beautiful posture.I'm going to cut you upright.The man was very happy to hear that, and said: Thank you!Please take care!It's like hearing foreigners say that our economy is developing fast.The result is to be cut vertically.Some people say that when Qiubeard cuts people vertically, he makes a sharp "click", which is very pleasant to hear, but when he chops horizontally, he makes a "boast" sound, which is not pleasant to hear.If you meet people of average stature, cut them diagonally in half with average voices.All in all, he had to use his brains every time he cut a person, and he won every time, and later became the king of Fusang.With this kind of king, Fusang people become very serious.When he became king, he naturally recruited all the widows he created into the palace as posthumous disciples.Those women had a grudge against him, so they deliberately punished him. Whoever he called put on twenty layers of clothes, and the belts were also bruised.Of course, if you do this, you will inevitably have some prickly heat.They also put plasters all over their bodies, pretending to have skin diseases, and peeled off the back of the paper. Their bodies were black in patches, looking like Dutch cows, exuding a pungent medicinal smell.But people have long since fought it out.At this time, he missed Hong Fu very much, because he felt that Hong Fu should belong to him, and was snatched away by Li Jing.The reason he thinks this is that Hong Fu is very beautiful, and she knows him.Only these two far-fetched reasons are enough for him.If you want to stop this kind of person's unreasonable thoughts, you must not be beautiful, or you must not know him. Qiu bearded man has a pair of big eyes, the white of the eyes is much, and the black eyeball is small, which fully reflects the three-dimensional space.Such eyes can often be seen in the self-portraits of modern painters, who share his voyeurism.His favorite thing to do in Fusang is to bathe in hot springs, because Fusang is a mixed bath for men and women.He always looked at other girls' chests in a despicable way. At this time, his eyeballs almost moved to her breasts—another metaphor is that he turned both eyes into toothpaste and squeezed them on her chest— When I see a beautiful girl, I have to give her a bath.Later, the Fusang women all wore breathing tubes when they took a bath, and when they saw such a despicable guy as Qiubeard, they would dive into the water.His despicability is that he has a hot spring in his palace, and he has to run out to take a bath, and say, I am having fun with the people-but I don't know where the fun is.The same is true of our principal. He has his own car, but squeezes onto the school bus, making everyone afraid to speak in the car, because you have to be careful when speaking in front of the leaders.And he is so fat, no one is ashamed to let him stand.In the car, he hypocritically asked if the food in the cafeteria was good, and everyone had any opinions on the evaluation of job titles, but no one was in the mood to talk to him.After getting on the school bus, everyone's hearts went home.If you want to ask for opinions, why don't you take up some working time?Now we can talk about how the bearded man became king.The most important thing to be a king is to have sex with concubines, and those concubines hate him for killing their husbands. If people from other places would have killed him, eunuched him, or at least bit him, no matter what Ken let him use his body.But the Fusang people are very disciplined, and no one can refuse the king, so they only dare to wear several layers of clothes and put plasters on their bodies.When the clothes were all taken off and the plaster was exposed, the women had no choice but to turn their legs up in a proper manner, and at the same time, gnash their teeth and stare with white eyes.If this kind of situation happened to Xiao Sun, I would never dare to continue the matter. I would only dare to ask politely: What's wrong with me?But Qiubeard didn't think so, because he was the king.So he just did his own thing, and only patted his ass after the matter was over, and asked hypocritically: Why are you wearing plaster all over your body?Take care of your body if you are sick.As for people covering their faces and crying bitterly, calling him a beast in clothes, telling him to die, etc., he pretended not to hear.In fact, he may not understand, because he does not understand Japanese.But China and Japan have the same language, and they were closer in ancient times. If they are refined, they are the same language.So sometimes he can understand.In short, if people say good things about him, he can understand them, but if they scold him, he can't understand them.The same is true of the people in charge today.The whole point of being a leader is to always feel good about yourself. The whole point of not being a leader is to never feel good about yourself. Qiubeanggong's palace in Fusang is very spacious.The top of the head is paved with tiles made of bark, and this part is like a pine cone that has been dried and cracked after ripening.Below, stretched from the eaves to the floor, some wooden boards, this part is like an oversized packing box.The entire wall is made of hibiscus paper, which is very tough, so this part is like the model airplane wings I pasted when I was a child.I was about thirteen years old when I made these model airplanes.After that I started to pervert. ——Peeping at the swelling breasts of girls of the same age, secretly falling in love with the beautiful female teacher, until seeing the bras and panties displayed in the window, I have to dream about it.I have never written a love letter or talked to anyone in my life. Although I have mastered a language proficiently, women who can understand this language are the most in the world.Based on these circumstances, I feel that I was a pervert in the past, but only one of the perverts as many as the sands of the Ganges River.The same is true of the bearded man. He hides behind such a paper wall and gets close to those loose women.No matter how you say it, he is always the king of a country, as long as you make up your mind to find a woman like Hong Fu, you can always find him.Then he would throw himself into the sea naked with her, or go down to the stars at midnight, and if he did that, the bearded man would be proud once in his life.But he didn't, which meant that he wasn't complacent, but that he didn't want to be complacent. We know that Qiubeard had a short-term depravity in middle age, which he admitted frankly, and said that this was his "sacredness of holiness".In his old age, he repented and developed in the opposite direction.For example, in the past, he always held his breath in front of Hongfu, so as not to blow away Hongfu's smell with his own breath, but later he farted in front of women recklessly, and finally got a "trumpet player" among concubines. " nickname.In the past, he liked to peep at Hongfu's long hair like a cloud, but later he asked all women to cut their hair short or wear pigtails.In the past, he liked to peek at Hong Fu's bulging breasts.Later he asked all the concubines to strangle him.He used this method to forget the setback he had received from Hong Fu, and finally made himself very weird. three The bearded man said that although a slender and sexy woman like Hong Fu is good-looking, she looks depraved.After saying this, he forgot what it means to look good.Call bad-looking good-looking.He also said that although the noodle soup in Yang's Mansion was delicious, eating it was depraved.After saying this, he forgot what is good food, and called bad food good food. It used to be very reluctant to eat sashimi, but now it is not enough, and there is no need to slice it. He picked up the tail of a fish , put it in the mouth, and then spit out the scales, fish head, and fish tail.He can swallow more than a dozen fresh fish in one go, and it looks like a fish-cleaning machine performing at this moment.Seeing this scene, the Fusang people sighed: "The real king is also!"If he could devour raw fish from the beginning, he would be the King of Fusang without cutting people into two pieces—the essence of this statement is that Qiubeard finally won It is supported by Fusang people.Another way of saying is that when he became a king, others disapproved of him, so he pretended not to like beautiful women, he liked to eat raw fish, etc. It looks like I forgot.No matter which statement is right, the result is the same—the bearded man neither likes beautiful women nor wants to eat noodle soup.After figuring this out, his eyes retracted into their sockets, and his asthma suddenly recovered. Now we can talk about why the bearded man wanted some of his enemies' wives to be his concubines.It's always like this for the bosses, the more they shouldn't have something, the more they want something.When I was doing research on the history of science and technology, I found that there was an emperor who liked to drink the milk of birds and smell the farts of fish, but unfortunately I forgot his name and source (my memory deteriorated after I became a renrui).This piece of information is not detailed and untrue, so you don't need it.Today's head eats animals under the first and second categories of national protection whenever he eats, so it can be counted as one.When we go out on the street now, we run the risk of being crushed to death by a limousine.According to my country's economic situation, the head car should be a German Volkswagen Beetle, but in fact it runs a German Mercedes-Benz and a French Peugeot.Qiubeard said that he could have any kind of woman, so he asked for the enemy's wife first.Later generations also did this kind of thing. For example, Zhu Hongwu took Chen Youliang's ex-wife as his wife after conquering the world.That tricky old lady had already passed menopause, and not only did she not want to have sex, but she really didn't want to live.First of all, she refused to eat and wanted to starve herself to death, so Master Hong Wu invited a duck-feeding master from Beiping to feed her twice a week.Secondly, she refused to poop and wanted to suffocate herself, so she had to give her an enema every now and then.Secondly, she sat and refused to move, and wanted to sit out of hemorrhoids and bleed to death, so she had to send a maid to hold her ears and make her move.In the end, she refused to let Master Hongwu get close, so she had to hold her down with twenty people each time.Fortunately, we have plenty of manpower in China, so we are not afraid of her playing tricks. If we were in a country where manpower is scarce, we would have to put a rolling pin on the back of her head.If he was killed, he would be a corpse rapist. Even though Qiuran Gong's concubine is not so rambunctious, she is also very bad.But he is rare or not, bad or not.In terms of women, as in other aspects, Qiubeang Gong was completely reversed in black and white.So after his enemy's wives were all tortured to death by him, the concubines he married were uglier and less intelligent than the other, and they almost pissed off all the beautiful women in Fusang.Those beautiful women really wanted to come into the harem, and they were tortured to death by him, and they had always had this qualification, but now they suddenly lost it, and I felt very sad.Because they can't get such an opportunity, they have to marry the nobles, but the nobles are also emulating the king, competing to marry ugly girls with low intelligence as wives.In the end, they had no choice but to become geisha and were tortured to death by others.The bearded man later said: "Man is the best thing in the world. He has two legs to bear weight, two hands to work, and a head, which is somewhat useful."He has great strength, and if he is encouraged, he can be even stronger; if he eats very little, if you are not afraid that he will starve to death, he can eat even less.It doesn't take much space to bury it after death.Good stuff like this should totally be mass-produced, mass-produced.If there were people everywhere, everything would be easy to handle.When you see that there is no road, you point to it and say: There must be a road!There's a way right there.He was already King Fusang when he said this.Later, he encouraged childbirth in Fusang, and there were people everywhere.My opinion is different from his. Sometimes I rush to go to the public toilet, and when I go in, there is shit all over the floor. I really don’t know why this house was built and these holes were dug.People are such dirty things, if they are everywhere, I don't know what will happen.But no matter how hard he pushes, there are not as many Chinese people in Fusang.Finally, there were more people, and after a typhoid fever, he had to start over again, and issued a strict order: Any man who dares to ejaculate outside the body will be killed without mercy!But he himself is an exception, because he already has too many little princes, and none of them suffer from typhoid fever, or because they eat well, they will not die of typhoid fever, and they fight every day for power, which makes him a headache, so he always Creampie.If it is fair to say, whether it is a prince or a commoner, it is not good to have too many.But who can be fair?Take me for example, although I am disgusted by the crowd, if the street is full of beautiful women, I will not object, anyway, they will not dirty the men's toilet. Four Hongfu is one of the many beautiful virgins in Yang's Mansion. When mentioning many beautiful virgins in Yang's Mansion, one will think of the tropical flower house in the botanical garden.There is a sultry climate here, and there are many strangely beautiful flowers.In it, she sometimes walks through the garden wrapped in her hair, showing a beautiful little face and talking to others, blowing the hair on her face while talking.After finishing speaking, he walked away in a hurry, leaving behind an indistinct virgin fragrance all the way.Or she is sitting on a bench like a black cocoon, with a tiny foot poking out from under her hair.This foot is as immature as a baby's foot, enough to be worshiped by a foot-worshipper for a lifetime, and the bearded man used to be such a foot-worshipper.If she turned her legs up, she would reveal her smooth calves.It was a reminder that she was naked and had nothing on her body but her hair.Seeing this scene, the bearded man felt his heart skip a beat when he thought of how naked she was.The situation changed a lot when she shortened her hair, showed the model's figure, and had sex with Li Weigong on the river beach.One of the biggest changes is that she is no longer a virgin.If Hongfu knew that the bearded man was thinking this way, he would ask him: am I a virgin, what does it have to do with you?This shows that she is not a sensible person.Whether she is a virgin or not is related to everyone, especially Mr. Qiuran.Qiubeard is a great swordsman.If there is such a person now, the lives of all of us hang in his hands.When he found out what Xiao Sun and I were doing, he would come to our house and swipe the two of us six times on the bed so that we couldn't find the second half.Although my butt looks different from hers, I may not be able to remember the difference after being cut with a sword.This example shows that we must follow the rules in this world so as not to irritate others.But people like Qiubeard must be careful not to be stimulated.Saying this is assuming that the bearded man is the same as us.They are all the masses, but the division of labor is different.After Hongfu and Li Weigong had sex on the river beach without self-respect, which stimulated the bearded man, he could no longer be the leader of the crowd, and had to be the leader.This is because before this, Qiubeanggong's whole heart was on Hongfu, sniffing her indistinct fragrance, stroking her erratic hair, following her light footsteps, and finally found that she was walking in broad daylight. Lift your legs up and talk to others one by one!For a mass of people, this is unthinkable.You can kill her, but you can't demand anything from her.But the head is different.From ancient times to the present, the word Toutou can be summed up in one sentence, which is power over others.A real boss doesn't suffer from asthma, and his eyes don't bulge out. Qiubeang Gong later became a big leader, but he still couldn't control Hongfu, so he still couldn't write off Hongfu's stimulation to him.So he carried out ideological remolding on himself.The term thought remolding is called brainwashing in the West, which is a misinterpretation.The brain cannot be washed while a person is alive, it can only be transformed by himself.And as we have heard in the past, the more you become a leader, the more you need ideological remolding.Take the bearded man as an example.Before becoming a leader, I was stimulated by a beautiful woman, so I later felt that it is better for women not to be beautiful.I think I'm stimulating Berkeley, California.He comes to me every day now, talking about textbook manuscripts, asking me to bring him graduate students, and co-writing papers, but nothing good.I don't think this stimulation has anything to do with sex, because when he broke into my room, sometimes there was a box of condoms on the table and Sun's sexy underwear on the bed, but he turned a blind eye to them.It must be because I proved Fermat right under his nose.I also stimulated Xiao Sun, she not only bought sexy underwear, but also bought a tube of ointment, held it in her hand and put it under my nose for me to see, but this distance is too close for presbyopia.I asked her what it was, and she said it was breast augmentation cream, "Don't you think I'm not plump?"This is purely a misunderstanding.But she said: You put it on me!Later, the tube of ointment was placed in the bathroom.I can't see clearly I brushed my teeth with it and threw it up when I thought it tasted bad, but I felt bad all day and felt like my mouth was full of breasts.This stimulation has a lot to do with sex.No matter what kind of stimulation it is, it can motivate others to be my leader, and it can also motivate me to obey the leadership of others.This is where I am different from others. When I go out with Berkeley, California, he always tells others that this is my assistant and partner (in formal occasions, he often forgets the second half of the sentence) Wang Er.When I think of my white hair and presbyopia, I am always afraid that the wind will blow his tongue away.And Xiaosun now only uses the posture of a female superior, but also symbolically strangles my neck.It made me feel less like sex and more like being tortured to extract a confession, but I don't know what she wants me to recruit.Qiubeanggong's stimulation also comes from sexual aspects, so he must be the leader.In the East, however, the most important aspect of the chief is the sexual aspect.We must transform ourselves as well as others. Regarding this point, I have an example. Last week in the department, I met a married female employee distributing washing powder.The old lady from the trade union shouted in a rough voice: Those who don't have a ring are not allowed to receive it!The ring is also the birth control ring.Someone asked: We use tricks, can't we?The answer is: no!I don't know how many people have changed to Shanghuan after being stimulated by this kind of stimulation, but one by one, why do you care what they use?This incident reminds me of Qiubeard making soap in Fusang.You know, Fuso people like cleanliness most, and Fuso doesn't grow saponin trees, and whale oil soap is a necessity of life.That kind of thing is boiled out of plant ash and whale oil. Although it looks like cow dung, it is like Chinese salt, and private production is strictly prohibited.Every month he sent someone to the village to distribute such things, and that person shouted loudly: Don't get it if you are not pregnant!Someone said: We just got married, we fuck every day, and we are about to get pregnant.Can't you get it first?The answer is: no!This shows that he likes to see every woman's belly is round, like a grasshopper, which means that they are contributing to the prosperity of the Fusang Kingdom; or seeing them lying there with flat breasts and sparse pubic hair, as if starving Lice, that means they've done their best.What is needed now is for them to contribute again.At this moment, if the image of Hong Fu in the river appeared in his mind, he would give her a hard slap on the head and shoot her out.This is because the boss can't bear to see a beautiful woman having sex with a man on a sandbar.These two dogs and men are smug, and this smug has nothing to do with the boss!But a flat woman doing it at home is different.这里面没有臭美的成分，而且不管是和谁干，都是给我造孩子哪。这说明了什么叫头头素质——它就是某个人全力的营造一个新世界，不管这个世界实质上是多么糟糕。而我就没有一点头头素质。加州伯克利提拔我当教研室主任，主要工作是在每周五下午两点半组织全室同仁开会。我总是提前到达会场，刷出五把茶缸子（这是全室的人数），仔细烫过，以防肝炎传染；等大家都来了以后，我给大家沏上茶，就坐到屋角去抽烟——小心翼翼地不要舔破烟纸，不要把烟丝吃进嘴去。不知为什么，大家一提到我当了室主任这件事就要捧腹大笑，甚至在地上打滚。我有三个男同事，两个女同事，女同事之中有一个长得像狒狒。这样讲，不知道漏掉了谁没有。 Fives 我想，在性的方面和别的方面一样，存在着两个世界。前一个世界里有飞扬的长发，发丝下半露的酥胸，扬在半空又白又长的腿等等，后一个世界里有宽宽的齿缝，扁平的乳房，蓬头垢面等等。当然，这两个世界对于马也存在，只不过前一个世界变成了美丽的栗色母马，皮毛如缎；后一个世界变成了一匹老母马，一边走一边尿。前一个世界里有茵茵的草坪，参天的古树，潺潺流动的小溪等等，后一个世界则是黄沙蔽日，在光秃秃的黄土地上偶尔有一汪污泥浊水——简言之，是泥巴和大粪的世界。这两个世界对于猪来说也存在，而且和我们所见到的没什么不同。假如把可能性的问题放在一边，选择哪一个世界，这在动物来说根本不是一个问题。我的马兄弟对小母马有兴趣，对老母马没有兴趣。当司务长失败了以后，我又放了一阵子猪，开圈时它们很乐意出来，但是想让它们回圈，就得用棍子打。这就是说，它们都乐意去前一个世界。但是对人来说就是个很大的问题。前一个世界里有所谓优美，但它是想入非非的产物；后一个世界里只有头头和不是头头。虬髯公从洛阳城里出来盯红拂的梢，那时他是想进入前一个世界的。后来觉得自己不属于那里，又退回来了。另外一方面，中国人，尤其是汉族人，喜欢泥巴和屎，勾践就吃过屎，别人则吃用屎种出来的东西。这就是我们有异于禽兽的地方罢。尽管虬髯公后来当了扶桑王，但他还是个中国人。后来他在扶桑造出了几百个孩子，并且终日和乳房扁平的女人鬼混。久而久之，自己也变得扁平，手脚之间长了厚厚的肉，好像一只鼯鼠。再后来他又变得像一条比目鱼，既不能直立，又不能翻身，只能够在地面上爬动，好像乌云飘动一样贴地面行。等到他老死的时候，只有一寸厚，嘴脸都长在背上，但是有半个排球场那么大，完全没有办法把他从房子里弄出去，只好用锯子来锯，然后一层层的放进了棺材。假如不放进棺材，而是洒上盐的话，完全可以当腌鳐鱼来卖。well!真是糟蹋了东西！ 虬髯公到了老年，四肢都长成了平摊的形状，好像螃蟹腿的上半截一样，固定在水平方向上了。好在他的手指和脚指都变得十分发达，每一个都长到了一尺多长，可以用于行走，所以他就有二十条腿了。这样他能够比年轻时跑得更快，更不知疲倦，更像飞行。只不过是在离地面一尺的平面上。他的全部骨骼也变成了平板状，长到了身体的正面——或者说是下面，而且变得柔软而有弹性，这样任何一堵墙都挡不住他，因为假如有门的话，他就可以从门缝底下滑进来；没有门的话，他可以从墙头上飘过去，就像风吹动的一幅床单飘过墙头一样。他的面容就如一幅画像，绘在了他本人的背上，不管怎么说，大家还能认出这是古往今来最伟大的剑客虬髯公，扶桑人也能够认出这是他们杰出的国王。这个时候他可以入水而不沉，起大风时还能在天上飞行；但是他已经很难被看到了，这是因为池可以随着环境改变颜色，到了草地上就是绿色，到了沙滩上就是黄色；所以只有一些小孩子在草地上玩耍时误踩了国王一脚，遭到了喝斥；或者是渔夫在海滩上收网时犯下了大不敬罪，被砍掉了双脚。这时候他们可以看见国王。这个时候他早就把朝政交给了首相，自己去云游四海，而云游这个词对他来说才是真正适用的，他可以早上从京都出发，中午时分就到达北海道，傍晚时候回来。这个时候他有时还要扒灰，但已经是和曾孙媳。我国古代的哲人说，他到了七十岁就能够随心所欲不逾矩。假如能活到一百五十岁，肯定就会长成虬髯公的模样。扶桑人深为自己有这位了不起的国王而自豪，到处都悬挂了他的巨幅画像，但是因为他本人行止不定，所以大家都以见不到他本人而遗憾。其实这种遗憾是多余的，事实上每个扶桑人都见过他。据我所知，虬髯公平常栖身的地方就是他自己的画像。他最喜欢爬进画框，用本人把画像取而代之。这样干除了舒服之外，还可看出谁敢对他不敬，以便爬下去咬他的后脚跟。但是扶桑人是杰出的民族，谁都不会对国王不敬。所以他就没有咬过几个人的后脚跟。 变扁了以后，虬髯公眼睛里的世界就变得像两个碟子，每个碟子都像一个鱼眼镜头拍摄的画面。鱼眼睛看东西扁，是因为它们的眼睛是扁的，而虬髯公的眼睛比任何鱼的眼睛都要扁，而且他的脑子也是扁的，扁到了不能把两眼的画面合一的程度。到了这时，虬髯公才体会到了鱼的美德。well known.鱼类没有阴茎阴道这类的玩艺儿，更不用肉麻兮兮的求爱、做爱。大家只是十分本分地把卵子精子都屙出来，然后就可以诞生出无数的小鱼。这样就可以彻底灭绝想入非非。后来他就用这种美德来教诲他的人民，只可惜大家过于鲁钝，一时不能体会。他只好退而求其次，每到夜晚上就在各地游动，看看谁在偷懒。假如看到了男人和女人各自躺着，就怒吼一声：“干什么呢！”他的臣民听见了，就赶紧趴到老婆身上去。假如谁不听国王的督促，他就飘进来，从女人的身上飘过去。只这一飘，女人就受孕了，而且不是七胞胎就是八胞胎，生出来不是呆傻就是豁嘴。因为他的缘故，当时所有的扶桑女人都把丈夫抱在身上睡觉，丈夫不在家就抱着公公。这种行为，加上安分守已、逆来顺受的态度，合起来叫做“鱼德”，在当时的扶桑被奉为金科玉律。因为这是对头头最为恭敬的态度。而这种美德正是我们所缺少的。除了提倡鱼德，他还要和自己的后妃做爱。这对那些女人来说，是一种极为可怖的体验，一件冷冰冰粘糊糊好像一摊鼻涕的东西，也不打招呼，冷不防就涌到你身上来；然后也不知他干了些什么，就飘走了；只在你下半身上留了些绿油油滑溜溜的东西。这件事实在叫那些女人感到莫名其妙。而虬髯公自己也是莫名其妙，因为他的眼睛长在了后脑勺上，身体的下面也没有知觉，所以对身下的事一无所知。我对这件事也是莫名其妙，正如我不知道加州伯克利为什么要我也当个头头一只知道虬髯公用这种方式造出了不少小王子，还知道人要是不装假就要变成一条鱼。