Chapter 34 Part II.7.3

She quickly withdrew to the balcony.As soon as he ran up to the balcony, the four walls of the attic and the corridor leading to the stairs collapsed into the fire downstairs. It seemed that someone shouted: "Turn back!" So Wu Wei did not miss this scene—— The image of Ye Lianguang was branded on the base plate of Lie Yan, and together with the flames, it rose from the abyss of fire, and then was stripped from the base plate by Lie Yan and thrown into the air.Her thin body was bent, and her hair and clothes were teased, tilted, and torn by the flames, revealing her frail body that was too weak to be seen, not to mention a bit of beauty.Afterwards, she seemed to be rolling in the flames, with one leg slightly curled up and the other swayed outward, not at all like the entry "Fenghuang Nirvana" that Wu Wei read when he grew up.It was just a struggle for survival, the ugly struggle; the helpless and weak life screamed in the flames, struggling so recklessly, headless, with nothing to lose... Ye Lianzi was engraved in Wu Wei's life like this. In his life, he stood between Wu Wei and all the men.Such a leaf lotus seed can surely be replaced?!

The disaster squeezed them together tightly without leaving any gaps, and they were extremely strong. What force could get in? Whether it was a lover, father, brother, friend... How could Hu Bingchen understand the reason why no one can take Wu Wei away from Ye Lianzi! How many times, Wu Wei tried to tell Hu Bingchen about her life, which was neither long nor short, and could not be compared with his glorious life, hoping that he could understand the reason why she could not put anyone above Ye Lianzi; Hope that there is a force that can pull her out of that tight glued state; besides the love for Ye Lianzi, she needs other love...

After Ye Lianzi passed away, when Wu Wei told Hu Bingchen about the past, which was too heavy to mention casually, Hu Bingchen sat on the sofa with a newspaper open.Why does Wu Wei not understand the typical British refusal? But she was unwilling to give up and asked: "Honey, are you listening to me?" She turned her body sideways, hoping to avoid the newspaper blocking Hu Bingchen's face, and saw A slightly sympathetic face. Her answer was the sound of newspapers being flipped.She said sadly to herself: "It seems that I am being sentimental!" At this moment, Hu Bingchen flashed his face from behind the newspaper, let out a typical British smile on social occasions, and said leisurely: "Why, do you want me to cry with you too?"

Presumably Hu Bingchen also treated Ye Lianzi with this face.Wu Wei also blamed his mother for not being able to get along with him. She blamed her mother wrongly.But she could no longer say "I'm sorry" to Ye Lianzi.From then on, Wu Wei gave up, no matter what, she couldn't find someone who would love her, let alone give her a hand. In the end, Wu Wei didn't want to let herself go and fall into madness. It's not that she didn't struggle.After realizing that her beloved Hu Bingchen was unwilling to give her a hand, she even discarded the past and went to find her enemy Gu Qiushui.

At first they talked fairly speculatively.One night Gu Qiushui asked Wu Wei: "Do you often feel lonely now?" She replied: "It's not loneliness, it's loneliness. I didn't have it before, but after my mother passed away, I always feel that I have no roots in the world, and there are no people with flesh and blood. I am not afraid of loneliness. This should be regarded as my mother's legacy." A legacy to me, we lived alone for many years without expecting more from life, and when it came up, we were able to deal with it." Gu Qiushui asked again: "Do you think it's enough to have a confidant in life?" Wu Wei said: "...It's faded, it's faded... There are a lot of friends, but after my mother passed away, I was so painful that I couldn't hold it. But I searched through the phone book, but there is no one I can call to tell my heart." "Where's your husband?" Gu Qiushui glanced at his current wife who was busy in the kitchen.

Wu Wei smiled miserably, speechless. Gu Qiushui thought of the contact with Hu Bingchen. How could Wu Wei be his opponent? He felt a little annoyed, "I really don't understand, what's the point of you raising and supporting a high-ranking emperor? Does he love you? Respect you ?" "He loved me, and I loved him." "You really don't look like my daughter... Things between men and women are the least serious things, and suffering for such things is even more unworthy." Wu Wei began to feel wrong.Is this his outburst of anger, or has it always been like this? Could it be that he didn't take his mother seriously?

Gu Qiushui quickly put aside the insignificant topic of men and women, and continued: "Yeah, I often feel helpless now, rootless, rootless, coming and going, and the vast sea of ​​people has no reward. No matter what you like, you Pain, your sadness, no one can talk about it. Thinking back to the friend who has been inseparable all his life and has given up his life, I will go to see him today, and he will come to see me tomorrow. I can’t see you for a day, and I think about him for everything good... But But there is not a single memory that can be engraved in my heart." Gu Qiushui, who was not troubled by the love of his children, was really touched at this moment.

Wu Weiyou asked: "Have you ever dreamed about my mother?" He said: "Sometimes I dream. It's the old days, but it's not a familiar old scene; I'm in a place where I said I lived, but it's not a long time ago: I can't speak, vague, specious, like that. That’s not the case. Dreams are also scattered. This person is connected to that person. Sometimes the characters in the movie are connected to the person in the dream, and the life in the movie is also connected to my own life. Waking up and sighing, My life has passed like this, and there are some things that I can’t make up for even if I want to, and I can’t do anything if I think about it. Yuan Zhen wrote many mourning poems, and I have forgotten them all, but I only remember one——

Xie Gong is the youngest and sympathetic to daughters, marry Qian Lou and be good at everything; Gu I have no clothes and search all the suitcases, and he buys wine and pulls out gold hairpins; Wild vegetables fill the meal with sweet taste, and fallen leaves add salary to Yangguhuai. Today's salary is more than 100,000, and I will lay down with Junying and resume camp. "What's the use? Nobody's here anymore. "Our whole life has been in vain. What ideals and pursuits are empty-handed in the end? It's ridiculous to think about it. Even if we have money, we don't know how to spend it. Those people in the Northeast Army just play mahjong, what else? ?It’s not like today’s young people, who have karaoke and go abroad. There are so many tricks... But what can you gain if you keep running around where your mother lived? You can’t find anything.”

Wu Wei said: "It was a comfort to me, and I made a wish. In fact, I was looking for my mother. I know I can't find her, but it's good to find a state of mind. Buddhism doesn't say 'everything is made by the heart' Is that what it is." Talking, talking, talking about Wu Wei's weirdness when she was young, and naturally talking about her performance in the catastrophic fire in Liuzhou. Gu Qiushui said: "Why don't I know these things? Where was I at that time?" "You and Asu are in Guilin." So far, what Wu Wei thought of was just narrating the facts, without the slightest intention of provocation.

"No, I'm not with Asu." "Then why did my mother hide and teach?" Gu Qiushui said contemptuously, "Your mother can still teach? She only graduated from elementary school, so even if she becomes a teacher, she's still a fool." Even if Gu Qiushui had a little introspection, Wu Wei would never bring up the past again.Just as Gu Qiushui grew up amid guns and artillery fire, Wu Wei grew up with Ye Lianzi's suffering, and every bit of Ye Lianzi's suffering was embedded in her life.Ye Lianzi, who is self-respecting and self-loving, has never told Gu Qiushui about their efficacy to the creator of these sufferings.But now, if she didn't tell their maker Gu Qiushui about their efficacy for Ye Lianzi, if she didn't punch Gu Qiushui in the face, she would be too sorry for Ye Lianzi. "I would also like to thank you. If it wasn't for your brutal ravages that forced her out of the house, she wouldn't be able to teach herself. After liberation, she was selected as a model teacher every year..." "It's understandable that you didn't write to us when you were in Yan'an, because we were in the enemy-occupied area and communication was inconvenient. But you arrived in Hong Kong around the Spring Festival in 1940. Anyway, you have settled down. Why didn't you give us a letter?" Shall we write a letter?" Compared with when he talked about "loneliness" just now, Gu Qiushui seems to be a different person: "Where can I find you!" Wu Wei gave him a cold look: "Old Gu, why are you pretending to be confused!" "Didn't you entrust us to the Bao family and the driver of the Bao family, Dong Gui? Write a letter to Dong Gui, and he will surely know about us." The whereabouts of my mother: Besides, my mother has no one to rely on, no relatives, no reason, where can she go?" He added: "I don't have any money, how can I write to you if I don't have money?" "Is it because you don't know where to find us, or because you have no money that you don't write to us? If you are alive, say that you are in trouble, and you can pick us up for a reunion when the situation improves. It will also give us a little hope and save my mother from hopelessness. Do poor people without money have to throw away their wives and children? Besides, you are not Without money, how can you dump us to the Bao family as babysitters? Can you blame them for treating us badly? You don’t care about the life and death of your own family members, can they take care of you?" Gu Qiushui jumped up and said, "Dare you come here to collect debts and avenge your mother! If there is a wronged person and a debtor, you can beat me to death!" Then he slammed into Wu Wei like a shrew. Wu Weiben wanted to say: No, I am not here to collect debts, I am about to fall into the abyss, even a straw is very important to me now; and there is not only a straw between you and me, but also the straw in the blood. A thread that's a little stronger than straw, and I'm here to butt this thread. But Wu Wei stopped, can she count on this wretched man jumping up and down in front of her to save her? It's not that Wu Wei is unwilling to forgive and cannot forget Gu Qiushui's crimes, but Gu Qiushui himself does not want her to forget.Listen to what he said just now; how could she shake hands with such a person? Even now she still refuses to admit any of her sins. My mother "suffered" for this wolf-hearted person in vain.Or throw away the illusion and get ready to fight.She glanced down at the little man jumping around beside her, and said lightly: "Stay aside and don't lean on me. Don't say that I am not here to collect debts, but I am here to collect debts." , come to revenge, what's wrong with it? And if you can settle the score, can you afford to pay? Let me tell you, you ruined my life!" The naked man with a red or purple dick hanging from his crotch, swinging around with his punches and kicks, reappeared in front of her eyes, and she even had The feeling of peeing her pants; and the stairs when she was two years old flashed back in front of her eyes at the same time... But she is not the defenseless little girl after all.Complaining is a prelude to forgiveness.Dai Wei absolutely didn't want to waste another word on how to ruin her life, just wanted to stab him with a dagger: "You have ruined my mother's second life, but you still have this attitude now! She is too kind, I never hated you, and finally asked me to find a way to get you back to Beijing. If she hadn’t forced me to go back to Beijing for you, I wouldn’t have gone! To tell you the truth, Chanyue won’t let me recognize you at all This father, she will not recognize you as a grandfather!" Gu Qiushui turned around and ran into the kitchen, took a kitchen knife and waved it up and down, left and right, and said, "You kill me, you kill me!" His current wife went up to stop him, and Gu Qiushui pushed her away frantically , Said: "What's the matter with you? If you stop me again, I will beat you!" Wu Wei raised his chin and said: "Decades have passed, I never thought you were still a soldier. Why did you beat her? What are you capable of? You will bully women in your life. Luckily, there are so many women who are willing to dedicate themselves to you , Sacrifice yourself. Look at this rusty kitchen knife, it’s not too shabby for you to handle it, and it’s still a soldier on the battlefield. Why should I beat you and kill you? I look down on you and it’s enough for you to suffer Do you think I’m my mother? Do you think I’m still that little girl who let you lift her legs and throw them out the door?!” She put her bag on her back and didn’t stay for a minute, saying “ Goodbye" without saying anything, and walked away without looking back.She knew that until death, they would never see each other again.These two people who feel drifting in the world are destined not to be able to connect the thread of their blood. She was very calm, knowing that with this departure, her time was almost up. The small town is far away from the station. Wu Wei walked in the winter night without lights, moonlight and stars, like walking on a vast wasteland.She thought as she walked, she couldn't find it, she couldn't find it, she couldn't find a thread that could hold her back in this world. This is a world where you can only live if you give up your heart-you have never had parents, lovers, husbands, siblings, children, or friends... But Wu Wei just can't give up, What if Wu Wei is not crazy at the end? Not long after returning to Beijing, Wu Wei received a letter from Gu Qiushui: The letter said: What right do you have to criticize me? Don’t you also marry and remarry; mess with men and women, and even have an illegitimate child! Hu Bingchen's wife sued the central government, sued the society, and sued the court. His hatred was gone. ’ Furthermore, she thought even more determinedly that Chanyue should never return to China. When Chanyue was in college, a male classmate failed to pursue him, so he wrote a letter similar to Gu Qiushui, "...what's so great about you, you think you are a princess? Who doesn't know that your mother is a famous broken shoe, whore Like a mother, like a daughter, how can you be better?" Yun Yun. If there is some reason for Han Mulin to insult Wu Wei like this, after all, she put a green hat on his head and is Wu Wei's victim.So what about Hu Bingchen, what happened to her past has nothing to do with him? And long before they got into the situation, Wu Wei gave him a truthful account of the notorious past, asking him to think about it... But once he initiates When he got angry, her confession became his shells, and he bombarded her mercilessly with these shells, humiliating her.Why can't she remember to use Hu Bingchen's love history to retaliate against Hu Bingchen? When she was in such a bad situation, relying on how many times more hard work and struggle than others, she finally became a writer, and at the same time, she also gained many unimaginable gains—— It can be said that when Hu Bingchen attended some important occasions, he was accompanied several times by Wu Wei, whom he usually despises and tortured in different ways, and said, "I want to show off to people, I have a wife like you! "Just a joke? Who can say that the lover who gave birth to an illegitimate child with Wu Wei and never showed his true nature, suddenly surfaced after more than ten years, saying to others everywhere, "I think I slept with her back then!" It has nothing to do with her success and fame?It's like Ke Q proclaiming "I touched her" when she saw someone, touching the little nun in the retreat nunnery.Who can say that Wu Wei's success is not due to the fact that Han Mulin no longer curses her in the future, but declares to others affectionately that "Wu Wei is my ex-wife, and I still love her until now"?... If Wu Wei is still an arbitrary The "broken shoe" and "bitch" who are reviled by others, so whether it is a lover, ex-husband, Hu Bingchen, or any man who claims to be passionate, who would pick up this "broken shoe" and have a relationship with this "broken shoe"? "Broken shoes"? Such a sensational story can only exist in Dumas's.Who can say that her success and fame were not the reason for that male classmate to pursue Zenyue, otherwise why did she not get Chanyue's promise at all, and she widely boasted among her classmates that he is the future son-in-law of the famous writer Wu Wei? It cannot be said that these four men represent the whole of Chinese men, but at least they represent several aspects. Perhaps this is the reason why Chanyue had to go abroad.She couldn't bear the endless blackmail and extortion of their mother and daughter by men using the issue of Wu Wei's illegitimate child.If she talks about marriage in China, her future husband-in-law will humiliate her with her mother Wu Wei's question when he becomes angry. Even if Wu Wei enters the coffin, it cannot be written off. Coincidentally, Wu Wei is a very beloved female writer in the 1930s. When she was alive, her emotions, youth, body, talents, and money were all exploited by men, but she never received a real love from a man.But after she was lonely and withered and her literary fame rose, these men suddenly appeared, vying to say that she was her husband, lover, and her copyright heir, and they were beaten to death. Ye Lianzi, who escaped from death, had no time to think about her luck or misfortune, so she hurriedly went to look for Wu Wei.I saw a small person standing calmly in the center of the flames. The little girl standing alone in the center of the flames seemed not to be her daughter, but a daughter born of the flames, a daughter who would suffer all kinds of misfortunes.For a moment, this scene made Ye Lianzi so frightened that she forgot everything around her and thought about Wu Wei's future life. Could it be that the women in their family are all fire lives? Ye Lianzi quickly jumped off the balcony and looked at the courtyard downstairs surrounded by flames. No matter whether she lives or dies, this is the only way to survive now.Fortunately, the buildings in Liuzhou are not too high, so she quickly threw the quilt down, and only now did she feel that she did not save the money but rescued the quilt first. It was God's guidance.Then she slid Wu Wei onto the quilt along the eaves.The circle surrounded by the elbow flames was getting smaller and smaller. She turned around and lay down, supported the eaves of the house, stretched out her legs and slid down against the eaves, and landed safely. She quickly wrapped Wu Wei in a quilt, and rushed out mouth "black well". Wu Wei's small face was reddened by the flames, and there were unrealistically large beads of sweat on such a small face; even such large beads of sweat were immediately dried by the heat wave before it flowed down his cheeks.The roots of her soft hair were stuck to her forehead by the sweat that dries instantly. A small fist was clenched tightly against her chest, and she looked at the sea of ​​flames she had just escaped without being surprised... Ye Lianzi watched blankly as the entire street was gradually reduced to ashes. I can’t figure it out, why does the landlord’s family lock the door leading to the attic and the first floor? Is it locked every day or today? If you lock it every day, why can you still go in and out through this door every day when you go to and from get off work? Someone locked the door at that moment? She couldn't help but think again, the prophecy that came from the time and space when she was suffering from typhoid fever in her hometown when she was a child.When everything was reduced to ashes, people appeared all over the ground out of nowhere, and there was also a muddy soup mixed with water, soil, and ashes, soaking the exhausted people who had survived the catastrophe. Ye Lianzi sat in the muddy soup with Wu Wei in her arms, recalling the days when they lived in the same room with Gu Qiushui Asu, sitting on the ground with nothing, could it be called a happy life? People walked around in shock, or hugged each other, guarding their homes that had been reduced to ashes.Only she has nothing to guard, and the reason why she is sitting here is because she is homeless.Wu Wei fell asleep, with green circles under his eyes, and his eyelashes stuck to his lower eyelids obediently.Except for the quilt wrapped around Wu Wei and the thin pajamas on their bodies, they didn't even have shoes. Fortunately, the winter in Liuzhou is not very cold: Ye Lianzi folded the quilt in half to wrap Wu Wei, and Wu Wei's little feet were exposed. On the outside of the quilt, there were bloodstains from the rubble all over it.Those small and tender feet hadn't worn out the moon, so they went through fire and water like this, weathered the wind and rain prematurely and met the world, and started such a bloody journey prematurely.They really deserve a little care, and that's enough. People who have come down this road are easy to be satisfied. Decades later, whenever Hu Bingchen tortured Wu Wei, these little feet would reappear before Ye Lianzi's eyes: She would inevitably think: Hu Bingchen, you are too stingy, why can't you give this pair of feet? How about a little love for your little feet? Ye Lianzi pulled down the quilt and covered Wu Wei's bruised little feet. Wu Wei's feet were covered by leaf lotus seeds, but the scars on her feet just grew on it, forever. From time to time there are reporters interviewing.The reason why the reporter was more interested in Ye Lianzi was because she was able to escape from the upstairs with no escape route and took a child with her. "Excuse me, is there a big loss? The family is not in any danger, is it? Where is your husband?" "Excuse me, madam, how did the fire start?" "You're a strong woman, dealing with such a disaster alone..." Ye Lianzi didn't answer anything, she just... -wei cried sadly.No one can tell what caused the fire.Someone said that the barrel of gasoline brought back from the airport by the landlord's son who worked at the airport accidentally caught fire.But the landlord refused to admit it. Instead, he said that the embers in the kitchen had rekindled. The houses in Zhangzhou are almost all wooden structures. If there is no fire, I want to find a chance to burn it. If there is a fire, it will be even worse. 4 Someone knocked on the door, and knocked confidently.Gu Qiushui was a little flustered. When he fell off Asu, his hands didn't rest on the bed but rubbed against Asu's shoulders, causing her pain.She couldn't help crying out in pain, but Gu Qiushui didn't seem to hear it.Even an insensitive woman like Asu also thought of it at this time. Men only love women when they are in bed. That is to say, they love women for their own sake. This is really a bit like Hu Bingchen. Every time when Wu Wei had no emotion or defense, Hu Bingchen would suddenly hug her from behind, use his not-so-majestic object to push her buttocks hard, and gritted his teeth fiercely and said, "Fuck!" You!" Then he pushed her forward abruptly, and walked away cleanly, as if nothing had happened. There is nothing special about his flirting, but he is very particular about how he walks away, as if he is always worried that someone will see his flirting.In fact, they are already husband and wife, even if they tease Wu Wei a bit, although it is indecent, it is justified. Hu Bingchen is extremely fond of this kind of flirting. Compared with the proper sexual gratification with a woman on the bed, it has a different taste, and it also has a taste of reviewing the past and learning the new, like going back to the boyhood and watching artists who talked about Kunshu on Tianqiao Or pulling foreign films, or flipping through the erotic paintings under Lao Xiao's mattress.Just as a great man summed it up, it really is "a wife is not a concubine, a concubine is not as good as a maid, a maid is not as good as stealing, and stealing is as good as not being able to steal." That day, when Hu Bingchen walked away full of emotions, he was so violent that he even pushed Wu Wei to the concrete floor, causing her to fall hard. The pain made her lie on the ground for a long time and couldn't get up, but Hu Bingchen didn't even help her. Give her a hand.She lay on the concrete floor and said, "What are you doing, am I a whore?" Hu Bingchen didn't know what information Wu Wei got from his behavior.She thinks this kind of behavior reveals Hu Bingchen's deeply hidden selfishness - no matter when there are people or no one, he is always prepared to shirk responsibility completely; even if Wu Wei is his wife, don't plan to enjoy it. Preferential treatment; as for how the fallen woman coped with the embarrassment, it was none of his business. At the same time, Wu Wei also gradually understood that some honest gentlemen are not necessarily less obscene than her who has an illegitimate child. From this, she thought about Hu Bingchen's general attitude towards women.According to Hu Bingchen's confession, Wu Wei should be his true love, if he treats his true love like a prostitute, then he doesn't have to care so much about his relationship with other women, right? On the other hand, maybe Wu Wei is thinking too much.This is likely to be the imprint left by Hu Bingchen from his long-term underground work—under any circumstances, try to protect yourself as much as possible.Gu Qiushui dressed in a hurry, then pulled the quilt to cover the naked Asu, and walked to open the door resentfully. Qiu Shui asked, "Who are you looking for?" "Mr. Gu." "What's the matter?" "Mrs. Gu was hit by a flood, but she and her children escaped and are now at school. Mr. Principal asked me to send a letter..." Gu Qiushui took the principal's letter and said, "Okay, I got it." The person who came didn't leave, and stood gloomy outside the door, like a dark cloud blocking the door to rain. "Is there anything else?" "I have to wait for a reply." The janitor only took a look at Gu Qiushui, and knew why Teacher Ye Lianzi stayed at school all the time, and also knew that Teacher Ziye Lianzi would not leave Liuzhou if she had a way. Nearly died. "You have to wait for a reply?" Gu Qiushui was upset, "I don't know what to do, so I need your principal to give me some advice?" The door slammed shut. When Gu Qiushui rushed to Liuzhou and saw Ye Lianzi, mother and daughter sitting in the school office with arms and legs, he was really angry. He was angry because the knock on the door early in the morning showed that he had not fulfilled his responsibilities to the point where others had to speak out.And this notoriety is all caused by the two people in front of them who are neither short of arms nor short of legs. With a sullen face, Gu Qiushui looked at the new shoes on their feet and the bedding beside them, thinking about the letter the principal had given him.The new shoes were given by a school teacher, and the old quilts were brought from home by several teachers. They all seemed to be silently condemning the inhumanity of his husband. Although Gu Qiushui looked down on those teachers and their poor family members, he felt the condemnation implicit in the silence of these little people, so he asked Ye Lianzi: "What did you say to the principal?" "I didn't say anything." It wasn't an argument, but a truthful invitation. Arranging a husband with others? No, Ye Lianzi can't make people think that Gu Qiushui is bad, let alone make people think that her husband treats her badly. Colleagues repeatedly asked: "Why hasn't Mr. Gu come yet?" She said, "It's a long way." The colleague said, "It's about time." She said, "He has a lung disease. I don't know if he's getting better these days." "These two quilts can only be dealt with temporarily. Wait for your husband to come and fill them up one by one." "It's Chirp, as long as he's here." "You asked the principal to send someone to look for me?" Gu Qiushui asked again. "No, no." Ye Lianzi even complained about the principal. Isn't this a crime for her? Even when the huge fire trapped her and Wu Wei on the roof, she never called Gu Qiushui, and she never expected him to come out during the day. Come down, appear like a god, and rescue them from the sea of ​​fire.As long as there is a way and spare energy, Ye Lianzi is not willing to provoke Gu Qiushui again.After asking these questions, Gu Qiushui was still angrily and calmly.However, Ye Lianzi always felt that Gu Qiushui would always have a little bit of a sideways feeling about what happened to their mother and daughter, even if it wasn't out of love. She subconsciously stroked Wu Wei's leg, thinking that the child is really a good child, who never cries or yells whenever he encounters a catastrophe, and made things difficult for Di and Gu Qiushui since he was a child. As the parents of such a child, shouldn't they take good care of him? Wu Wei? Of course Gu Qiushui saw Wu Wei's scarred leg, but without Wu Wei, it would be easier for him to break up with Ye Lianzi, which made it difficult for him to feel guilty when facing Wu Wei's scarred leg. He really never had such a cruel thought: Why didn't the fire burn them to death? But he really didn't have such luck: Fortunately, they didn't get burned to death by the fire. "I let you travel all the way, are you tired?" Ye Lianzi asked.Gu Qiushui rolled her eyes and said, "Let's go." After walking two or three streets, Ye Lianzi realized that he was not taking them back to Guilin, but finding a small hotel for them to stay in.There is a sunken brown bed in the room, a wooden washbasin stand, a wooden table, and a wooden chair.The sheets were damp and dirty, as if they had been slept by many sweaty fat women or fat men, exuding the foul smell of the human body.She put the quilt on the bed, and timidly said to Gu Qiushui, "Sit down." Gu Qiushui refused to sit down, and seemed ready to leave at any moment.Ye Lianzi wholeheartedly wanted to persuade Wu Wei to stay but she didn't know how to persuade her to stay. She would only use it to dust the quilt up and down, hugged Wu Wei and sat down on the chair.If Gu Qiushui didn't speak, she wouldn't dare to say anything, what if she made a mistake? "You'd better find another house to live in." Gu Qiushui took out some money from his wallet, thought about it, and added some more, "If you can't find it for a while, you have to stay in a hotel for a few days." He neither asked Ye Lianzi How did a person escape with a child, and I didn’t ask you if you were hungry, thirsty, or cold, and I didn’t feel surprised that they were still wearing sleeping clothes in broad daylight. It is not terrible to endure hardships, what is terrible is to fail, and only then do I feel that the suffering is doubled and it is not worth it. Unworthy suffering is real suffering.Mr. Principal is a friend of Jin Bongru, and it is precisely because of this that Jin Bongru was able to find this teaching job for Ye Lianzi.As Jin Fengru, he has always pursued an attitude of not being able to intervene. Besides, he has heard about Ye Lianzi's situation in Hong Kong for a long time. It's just emotion, it's still inconvenient to intervene.It was Jin Bongru's secretary from Yan'an who intervened.The secretary and Gu Qiushui used to cover each other, thinking that a certain cigarette factory went to Hunan to purchase tobacco leaves, and did some underground work. Of course, he got acquainted with Gu Qiushui. understood.One day he suddenly came to Gu's house and said to Gu Qiushui: "Old Gu, if you don't let Ah Su go, your home will be destroyed. Look how pitiful Nannan is... Don't worry, I will give Ah Su the best of luck." Su arranges something to do." Gu Qiushui said: "Don't worry about this matter, I have nothing to do with Asu, we still have to rely on her for work." Seeing that Asu hadn't left yet, the secretary came again and said to Gu Qiushui, "Don't keep Asu anymore. If you treat Nan Nan like this again, I won't be polite!" Gu Qiushui said: " No, I can't let Aso go." While speaking, Jin Bongru's secretary took out a gun from his waist, looked at Gu Qiushui, and poked it on the table, Gu Qiushui didn't dare to say anything.This man who used all his masculine methods on Ye Lianzi lost all his true colors in front of a pistol that might have bullets in the chamber. Asu was present throughout the negotiation, but Gu Qiushui didn't look at Asu. Before leaving, Asu didn't say anything, let alone repay the money she gave Gu Qiushui back then, and just left silently like that. After Asu walked out of the house, Gu Qiushui began to beat his own head, and there was no other way.As he smashed his head, he thought, what would Asu think? He still owes her money, and now he has someone force her away with a gun... The secretary thought she was helping Ye Lianzi, but after Asu left, the relationship between Gu Qiushui and Ye Lianzi became even colder.Gu Qiushui stopped beating and scolding Ye Lianzi and Wu Wei from then on, but they didn't even talk to each other. 5 It is war to solve the Gu family's lifeless situation.At the end of August 1944, Hengyang fell, and Guilin was in a hurry. All the cultural elites and the people of Guilin rushed to Guiyang to escape. There are countless refugees congested inside, on the roof and bottom of the cars and trains, especially at Jinchengjiang Station.People even got into the bottom of the carriage and curled up on the partition connecting the two iron bars of the wheels, with only a little distance between the sleepers. Within a few days, Guilin and Liuzhou fell one after another, and the army abandoned the defense lines of Guangxi and Guizhou provinces... Gu Qiushui fled Guilin with his family and Zou Keren's family, and moved to the rear of Chongqing.They take the train first.The train is covered with "human thorns". Once passing through the cave, some of the "human thorns" hanging on the train will be scraped off by the rocks, and it will take time for blood and flesh to splatter, and the train will become smoother. Later, they switched to "scalpers" to transport cargo. Escaped people were sitting on the truck's cargo pile. Wu Wei's little hand was holding on to the bamboo strips that surrounded the truck. He watched how many people fell down the mountain stream when they failed to hold on to the truck. Immediately smashed to pieces.In the mountain stream, how many car wrecks have to endure the cruelty of the dead bodies in the mountains. Transferring from Chongqing to Shaanxi, Gu Qiushui handed Ye Lianzi, mother and daughter to Mr. Lu of the "Gonghe" in Baoji, and went to North China with Zou Keren to "underground resistance against Japan". Before leaving, Gu Qiushui said eloquently: "No one else brings their family members, and neither can I." Ye Lianzi didn't dare to say a word even though she knew that something was wrong.She is more than meek? Lian Shun accepted the call.With her ingenuity.Could have been a character, except that she had put her life entirely on another life.I mistakenly thought that that life was infinitely superior to me, and completely buried my potential. The trip from Baoji to Xi'an went smoothly. I found the secretary of General Yang Hucheng, and through him, I asked a commander of the Northwest Army to write a letter of introduction to Yan Xishan, the former governor of Shanxi Province.Only through Yan Xishan's relationship can we cross the Shanxi blockade to North China. In October, Zou Keren and Gu Qiushui took a mule cart from Xi'an through Hancheng and Yichuan, crossed the floating bridge at Hukou, crossed the Yellow River, and arrived in Jixian County, Shanxi. Zou Keren, who has also seen Harvard before, is not like Gu Qiushui, who has always been a passer-by on bumpy roads. He can take it easy in mule carts and difficult roads.They clearly walked on the pontoon bridge, but it was as if they were walking in the turbulent, rushing and clamoring turbulent waves. They were so small that they were not even as good as two drops of water on the waves.What is discourse hegemony? What does it mean to be able to say "no"? Then look at the Humen that Zou Keren and Gu Qiushui are passing through at this moment.That is the enjoyment of discourse hegemony.He is the one who can say "no" to the world.不但可以说“不”，什么时候一不高兴，说把世界提溜起来就提溜起来，说把世界拍碎就把世界拍碎、什么唐宗宋祖，什么成吉思汗，任什么风流人物也别梦想有一天“风流”会数到自己头上。邹可仁就想，幸亏他们的对手是日本人或蒋介石，如果是壶口，可如何是好?! 过厂壶门就是阎锡山驻地——少将比驴多的“克难坡”。 这正是刚刚到达陕北的毛泽东向山西运动，寻求发展，被阎锡山击退的一个重要原因。国共合作抗日后，有壶门这一天堑，阎锡山是稳坐钓鱼台了，共产党才不费一枪一弹，进入了抗日前方阎锡山阳的这块地盘。 见到这两位与东北军有着千丝万缕关系的人，西安事变前信誓旦旦支持张学良，事到临头就变卦的阎锡山，并没有一丝尴尬。何止是两面派?简直是多面派，据他们所知，和抗战对象日本人也有千丝万缕的关系，把这种多元化的局面玩得滚瓜烂熟，如鱼得水。安排他们在招待所住下，过了几天才和他们谈了一次话，没有什么实质性的话题。实质性的话题由他的谋士梁化之和外甥出面，不过是想联络利用他们的力量，顾秋水看出．打败日本后，阎锡山想独占华北，建立了一支“铁军”，准备日后进军北平。所以邹可仁和顾秋水电没敢和对方深谈，双方只是放一放合作的气球。其间请他们吃了一顿西餐，可能是知道邹可仁的哈佛背景。主菜是每人半只鸡，饭后甜点是一个大梨，对惜金如钻石的阎锡山来说，就算很不错了。 之后他们拿到了阎锡山的通行证，搭乘他向敌占区倒卖桐油的大卡车到孝义，又通过他的交通站弄到几张假良民证，才搭火车到北平，当晚没敢出站，就在站里等候转去天津的火车。 到天津天还没亮，满大街就他们两个人，找到朋友家就是叫不开门。不过拍了一户人家的大门，听上去可就像是拍在天津市家家产户的大门上。拍门声一传多远，这不明摆着告诉日本人此地非同寻常?们真着急呀，拐了这么大弯，费了这么大劲，到了家门口再让日本人抓去，多不上算。 最后他们潜伏在一个医生家的地下室，佯称是戒大烟的人，这时已是一九四五年一月，离日本投降只有几个月。可是那些所谓的“关系”根本联系不上，派人去叫也叫不来，谁也不敢理他们，工作根本无法开展。包天剑这时也回到天津，他的抗日热情也好，收复东北势力的雄心也好，都消失得无影无踪，再也看不到那个哪怕穿着不伦不类的美式军服的青年军官了。他常常自言自语道：“二太太没有了，财产也没有了，队伍也没有了，什么都没了……”看上去有点神经兮兮。 已经改换门庭的顾秋水，见到包天剑更是一傲然，他仍然记恨包天剑将他丢弃香港不顾的那档子事。要不是他在战场上忠义救主，包天剑恐怕早就成了炮下鬼。包天剑见到顾秋水，连那不投机的半句话也没有了，他们谁也不再记得当年的情义。情义算什么?就是青春结伴好前程的往事也不能让他们心有所动了，其实他们离心如止水还远着呢。 如果不是对包老太爷还有那么一点企图，即便都在天津，又住得很近，顾秋水也不会和包家来往了。 邹可仁和顾秋水多次向包老太爷宣讲未来的前途，请他出山，回东北号召一下，东北军的残余势力和大批土匪势力肯定响应，可包老太爷就是不动声色。邹可仁说：“扶不起来啦厂其实是有包天剑的前车之鉴参照着呢。反过来说，穷困潦倒的包家，如今就是向邹可仁借一钱也借不出来。而当初邹可仁去美国留学，还是包老太爷出资两万赞助呢……到了现在，邹町仁还想利用包老太爷的余热去实现他那东北王的美梦吗?真是做梦去吧! 天津没有指望，顾秋水只好到北平去串联那些东北军旧人，响应者依然寥寥。研究结果是设法通过伪满洲国总理张景惠等人，在日本投降前抢先抓到伪满“国军”的武装力量，把山海关夺在手里，堵截蒋介石的军队出关，并扩大力量，占据“南满”地盘。他们研究了武装策反的可能性，还回东北了解反叛杂牌军的实力、真假抗日之心，以及隐藏在某处的武器到底有没有，有多少…… 又与汪伪政权中几，个东北军旧人，如九一八事变前原张学良将军的参谋长，如今是汪伪政权绥靖主任胡玉昆的军政部长鲍文岳等达成协议，准备武装策反。 可是日本一投降，绥靖主任汉奸胡玉昆就被蒋介石抓起枪毙，鲍文岳也没得好死，一切都没来得技办。 日本投降后，他们又同伪满驻天津领事王某接上关系，打算趁日本投降混乱之际，从中得利?还通过包老太爷的关系，拉拢伪满“劳动奉公队”，据说该队有八千多人，掌握在一个东北军老军官“于大头”的手中，可是蒋介石来得太快，一切计划都成泡影。回东北了解情况的特派员也有野心，根本不调查、研究武装策反的可能性，而是大张旗鼓召开了各方力量的代表大会，会上成立了东北自治政府，还捎信给顾秋水：“……我们已经召开大会，与会军官二三十人，大家都说不能再等，如果不赶快行动，杜聿铭就要吃掉这些杂牌军。于是在会上成立了东北自治政府，邹可仁为主席，加上十二个委员，共由十三人组成。” 顾秋水连忙回信：“请尽快与共产党联系，否则我们没有后盾力量。” 几天后顾秋水从报纸上得知，特派员乘公共汽车前往哈尔滨寻找共产党的关系时，被国民党摩托车队追上捕获，并押往南京，于是与会者大多被捕被杀……甚至有人通知顾秋水尽快逃匿…… 问题都出在后面那个“可是”上。这些计划，像所有的想法在想法阶段上那样诱人，那样美妙，那样一厢情愿，那样停留在想法上，那样幽了一个英国式的默。除了一个让人慢了半拍的哈哈大笑，还能有什么? 而叶莲子一直以为顾秋水是在进行一番伟大的事业，想到因伟大事业不得不被遗弃的自己，也算是间接做了贡献——愿她永远不要知道事情的真相。 顾秋水大手一撤，叶莲子和吴为就像两颗被他啃剩下的酸枣核，前不着村后不着店地撤在了层叠起伏、深博不可探知的黄土高原上。她们能不能在哪个崖畔上抓住一把黄土，生出地们的根来，就看她们求生的本事了。 她们的虚浮、对人世不着边际的向往，即刻就被埋葬在那凄荒古远、令人断魂的旷野中，埋葬在水塘边难以见到的几枝颤抖的芦苇中，埋葬在散发着苍老湿气的废窑中，埋葬在如哭泣如挽歌的连阴雨中，埋葬在黄土高原没脚的黄土中…… 蓦然回首，不知何时，她们就靠在了那亘古至今支撑着天又支撑着地的塬上。她们惊心动魄地仰视着那矜持得近乎冷漠、苍凉得近乎死灭、拒人千里得近乎无情、线条随意待近乎粗陋却威仪凛然的黄土高原。不，黄土高原对她们的厚爱，要在他们彼此有所了解之后才能凸现。 而吴为也不曾料到，她们在黄土高原以及在寺庙中度过的岁月，将赐予她多少悟性，多少享用不尽的财富。 从此，顾秋水留下的那个箱子，就陪伴着她们一起踏上漫漫的求生之路。不知吴为浪迹天涯的脾性是由此而来，还是从外祖母墨荷那个游牧民族的祖先而来?很可能是秉承了外祖母墨荷那游牧民族的祖先。她的很多脾性，看得出是跃过了叶莲子而与外祖母墨荷的直接链接。 从此叶莲子将不断地“打起行李就出发”，辗转于各个临时的栖身之所。 但吴为很快就会接替孱弱的叶莲子，渐渐为叶莲子撑起一个没有男人的家。 这对吴为并不很难。叶莲子本就怀疑吴为是否天生被赋予雌雄兼容的禀性，十二岁上就能将行李打得平平整整、方方正正，像是军营出品而非出自女性少年，且不让叶莲子插手，即便几十年后，打行李这种手艺业已失势，吴为时不时还想向人们显露一手打行李的技艺，那难道不是她笑傲江湖的一个把势? 即便到了老年，不论走向何方，到了终于需要哪只手来帮一把的时候，她仍然独自一人连蹬带踹、手脚并用，用牙齿咬着绳子这一头，用手拽着绳子另一头，打出一个早被淘汰、再也没人欣赏的样板行李。只是事后会力不从心地叉着腿在地板上坐很久，才能颤颤悠悠地起立，不得不承认自己老了，不行了。可她就是不想独自经营她的行李，又有谁会为她搭把手呢?只有四顾茫然。 等到有了禅月，她就既是父亲又是母亲。即便有了历届丈夫，凡举登高爬梯、安装电器、负重养家……也都是她的差事。怪就怪在她像一个男人那样舍我其谁地认为，这都是她义不容辞的责任。 到底是谁把她造就成了一个男儿之身，却又给她一条女人的命?!不知除了雌雄，生物界还有没有第三、第四种属性，如果有，说不定她也会兼顾起来，瞧她对男人的责任那份大包大揽的热爱!她的两只手，跟着也就越来越发男相。 如果说吴为仅仅被赋予雌雄兼容的禀性还算不得奇异，到了她的两手越来越男相的时候，她那分野雌雄两性的中轴线也就越来越模糊，越来越往雄性偏斜靠拢。除了“同志”，哪个男人愿意再找个男人共筑爱巢!不过她也能在这种局面中找到安慰自己的成分，一旦男人对她撂厂挑子，绝对难不住她独挑家门的日子。 吴为一生可圈可点之处不多，但却是一把出苦力的好手，包括她对爱情也俾出苦力那样勇往直前，大干、快干、多干，像个独轮车把势，脑袋往下一扎，不看前后左右，只看脚下和车轱辘前方三尺之处，小车不倒只管推。而她不明白，爱情需要的不是苦力，而是锦上添花。到了这个时候，叶莲子有点明白了，她的日子大概再也不能和顾秋水交叉了。想起往事似午夜梦回，有那么点怅惘，有那么点迷茫，有那么点伤痛，有那么点锥心，也有那么点依依，但已不再多想。 这时她才不得不放下顾秋水，有点惊讶还有点惋惜，为什么要从一而终? 可叶莲子是个严格的女人，既不懂得为自己着想，也不懂得为自己寻找欢乐。 不论谁，都是第一次也是最后一次做人，难免身不由己地做错什么，可却没有挽回错误的机会了。叶莲子和吴为所出的每一张臭牌，都只能等候叶家的智者禅月来翻牌了。 叶莲子渐渐从过往淡出。此后的叶莲子，对风吹雨打、花开花落、无情无常有了一份大度、通达和默认。正是在黄土高原上，叶莲子才到达了天人会心的境界，上帝与她讲了和，她也渐渐归于恬淡平和。也许她最后还要出场。 而现在，该吴为上场了。