Chapter 7 seven

On Sunday morning, when I was brushing my teeth in the kitchen, I's mother came over and subconsciously looked at the door, and said: "I want to go to your father's work unit and ask them to give him another house." " Grinning his teeth and lips, he asked, "Don't ask Dad to live at home?" Ji's mother said, "I'm very annoyed that he lives here." He gurgled a few times with water in his mouth, then sprayed it out again, and said: Well, Dad is too pitiful. Ji's mother was not very happy. She said, "Then why don't you feel sorry for me? As long as I see him, my mood will be extremely bad. Ji, don't forget, I have raised you for more than 20 years , not him. The one you should be pitiful for is me!" I thought about it too.Ji's mother was a high-achieving student at Chongqing University, and Ji's father's classmate in the lower class.After Ji's mother was chased by Ji's father, she dropped out of school and devoted herself to being a housewife at home. It wasn't until after liberation that she responded to the call to go out to work and became a middle school teacher.When Ji's father left without saying goodbye, Ji's mother was only thirty years old, dragging her three young children, and struggled through the most precious twenty years of her life.Ji was only two years old at the time, and Ji's older sisters were nine and five.Despite such a life, I still remember that my mother seldom worried.In addition to reading books, my mother likes to solve math problems in her spare time.Once a difficult problem is solved, they clap their hands and laugh like a child.Mother was never worried.Mother always tidy up the house full of warmth.He remembers that when his two older sisters were at home when he was a child, he would always sleep at his mother's feet.Hua and Juan huddled together on the small bed.After turning off the lights, my mother often told them stories in the 14-square-meter house.He seldom listened to the end of the story.He always fell asleep to the beautiful voice of his mother, whom his older sisters Hua and Juan Bizhen adored.After all, Ji is a boy, with different interests and hobbies from them, while Hua Hejuan even imitates his mother's behavior.He often thinks that although he has no father, he still has a very warm family.

When Ji's mother washed her face with cold water, she said, "I'm surprised that you have suffered so much for him and still protect him like this." He said: "He is the father after all, mother, how are you going to drive back to the father?" Ji's mother said, "It's not that simple. Let's say Hua and Juan want to talk, and the family can't live there." "That's a way," said Ji. Ji's mother said, "Hua originally said that he would come home next month to have a look." Ji said, "Hua hates Dad the most."

Jie suddenly remembered the curse that his elder sister Hua had made on his father in the past before he said this sentence. Ji's mother said, "It's good that you know." It's hard to say whether Hua's hatred for her father was instilled in her by her mother or grew out of herself.Hua was nine years old when his father left home.Hua herself once explained that her hatred was not only because of her father's departure, but because her father never loved her children.Hua said: "Do you think I will like my father if he doesn't leave? No, a person who loves himself more than his own children will never get the affection of his children." Hua said: "If Dad has a dollar, so he must have used it to buy food for himself. If he had two dollars, he would buy a dollar and 50 cents to eat for himself, and the other 50 cents would only think about his wife and children."

He still believed everything he said to Hua.There is no doubt that the father is selfish, otherwise he would not have left when he was unlucky, leaving not only his wife and children but also all the money in the family.In this way, my father didn't feel that he was ashamed of the family, but on the contrary he believed that he had done a good job.Hua said, "You're too old, Ji. You don't know what life we ​​lived in those days." I wonder why I need to know about the past, but I don't know what your life will be like in the future?Ji thinks it is very easy to understand the father's influence on his children's life, especially Hua Hejuan.

According to Chi's mother, no matter how hard this life is, she still has to train her three children to go to college.But mother's wish to face the Cultural Revolution is just a beautiful fantasy.Juan, who graduated from Huazhong High School, graduated from junior high school, and the two went to the countryside together.Some things about Hua Hejuan were not clear at first. After his father came back, he hid on the bed and listened to his mother crying and scolding his father. Only then did he understand why Hua Hejuan chose their current life.I was so shocked by what happened to them that my heart trembled.But he could only keep silent.

Hua and Juan went to the countryside together, because of their father, they couldn't get out for many years.On a spring night, people in the neighborhood crossed the river to go to the commune to watch a movie. Hua Yinjuan stayed behind to take care of Juan's cattle when she fell ill.The old man said that he saw that Juan was very ill.Hua Hejuan has always been familiar with the boss, so he didn't care about anything.Hua vigorously expressed his thanks to the old man.While talking, Hua gradually felt that something was wrong with the old man.His eyes suddenly sparkled, and his back, which had always been bent, straightened.Hua didn't have time to set up his defenses, so he asked his arms like iron pincers to pinch him.Hua couldn't break free, and after a while, she fell down.The old man stripped off Hua's clothes and completed what he had planned for a long time.Before leaving, he still didn't forget to pour the chicken soup into Juan's bowl and take his bowl away.This is an old widower who lost his wife for many years.Juan was having a high fever, her throat was so hoarse that she couldn't scream, and before the scene was over, she fainted from fear.The story spread the next day.Both Hua and Juan hid on the bed without eating or drinking.The old man was taken away in a short time. When he was pushed into the jeep of the police station, the villagers begged for mercy, saying that his wife died for many years and couldn't bear it. The villagers didn't think it was what it was. Big deal.It's just that Hua Riri washed his face with tears and felt that he had no face to face others.To make matters worse, Hua became pregnant two or three months later.Everyone in the village regards it as a strange thing.Because the old man had been married for many years without having a child, but Hua conceived one for him in a short while.Hua didn't have the guts to go to the hospital to have an abortion, and Hua was afraid of ridicule. At this moment, the old man's nephew approached Hua and said that he would marry Hua and raise the child together.All the young and old in the village said it was really good.Hua already had the idea of ​​breaking the jar, so he agreed.After Hua got married, Ji's mother didn't know about it.I remember my mother read Hua's letter and scolded Hua for being stupid, then packed her luggage and hurried to Hua's place the next morning.When my mother came back a week later, I never heard anything from her.I only felt that my mother had been silent for several months.I always thought it was just because I found a countryman for Hua.Huahuai's child died before it was born.Fortunately, he died, otherwise, I thought, how would Hua treat him?How did Hua's husband treat him?Hua later gave birth to two more boys and one girl, and she became a farmer's wife with all her heart.Juan has never been married, and she thinks it must be because the terrible scene is always reflected in her mind.Juan later went to a nearby phosphate mine as a worker, and later became a teacher of a phosphate mine primary school.Juan's heart is like an ancient well, leading a monotonous and dry life.No one can shake her determination to be celibate.Juan is only in her early thirties, and at first glance, she already has the old and sickness of a fifty-year-old woman.People say that Juan will not live to be forty years old, and Juan herself thinks so.Once, Juan wrote a letter to Piao, saying that if one day she died, please Piao must help Hua a lot, and Hua got this far because of her.Ji didn't understand for a while why Hua was doing this for Juan.

The year Hua was raped was the fifth year Hua Hejuan went to the countryside.When my father listened to his mother's statement of this sad incident, he did not bicker with his mother as usual.It was only after a long time that my father grunted in a low voice and said, "Maybe it's all in my name?" The father's voice was so small that only Jie who slept with him on the same bed could hear him, and Jie's mother asked One sentence, "What did you say?" My father didn't repeat it, but he just felt that his breathing was very rough. After eating breakfast, he told his father that he wanted to go out to play, and then left.At that moment, my father was complaining that the noodles were much more unpalatable than before.He knew that his father didn't care about his going out or being at home, all his father cared about was his own food and clothing.The image of the paternal line is very different from when we first returned.Father's back straightened, and after effective treatment, his eyes lit up.Because of less exposure to the sun, my father also became much paler.Father began to restore his old style and attire day by day, and one day, I actually saw a silk handkerchief with a pattern dyed at the corner already in his pocket.Father wanted to reinvent himself, I thought.

Ji rode his bicycle to the station manager Wang Liu's house.He thought that even though he had promised Shen Ke, it should be the tone left by Wang Tan.People can't just leave one path for themselves. When I arrived at Wang Liu's house, Wang Liu was drinking.Knowing Wang Liu's hobbies very well, he also bought two bottles on the way, one of which was Dong wine.He gritted his teeth and bought it. Wang Liu picked up the wine and squinted his eyes to shine on the sun.It seems to be distinguishing between true and false.Then he said repeatedly: "Good wine, good wine."

I didn't say that I bought it specially for myself.He just said that a friend gave it to him.No one in his family drank it. Today he was out on errands and passed by here, so he brought it along. He said: "It is a blessing to let people who drink wine drink this Dongjiu. If you let me drink it, the effect will be the same as drinking medicine." These words made Wang Liu laugh out loud. Although it was on the way, I naturally had to sit down for a while.Wang Liu was on the head of the wine, and he was in a good mood, so he took a couple of sips with him, and Shen Ke was naturally involved.

Wang Liu said: "Damn it, it's just because of his uncle's strong waist that he doesn't take me seriously." Ji said: "He seems to be able to do it, and he is also responsible for his work." Wang Liu said: "He has a good mouth, and he can speak life if he is dead. Where is his real ability? Take it out and have a look? Let me tell you, Lu Jie, that true ability can only be developed through time. I am fourteen years old. The cart, how many years has it been, forty-two years. Haven't I seen anything?" Ji said: "Since Shen Ke has no real skills, you don't have to accept it?"

Wang Liu sighed, and said, "To tell you the truth, Lu Kai. Shen Ke is not only forced by his uncle, but also the bureau's intention. He wants to make him exercise, familiarize himself with the business below, and then become a company manager. Shen Ke Why did you work as a deputy battalion commander in the army earlier?" With a stir in his heart, he said, "Oh?! That's what happened." Ji felt that he had nothing to hesitate, and followed Shen Keqian, since he thought highly of him so much. When Ji Lin walked out, Wang Liu thought of something and said, "You follow me and work hard. Shen will get up sooner or later. I will let you take his place. If you suffer for a few months, I will guarantee you to come out." He exchanged a few words of greeting on his lips, but sneered in his heart. He rode his bicycle into the street.The gray and shiny road that was washed by yesterday's rain has dried up and turned gray and white.The sun comes right after the rain; it warms the air all at once. Seeing that it was already noon, I found a restaurant casually.I bought a bowl of hot dry noodles.While eating noodles, he found a girl walking by the door of the restaurant with a young man on his arm.Ji's heart suddenly lifted up.He vaguely saw that the girl was Xingzi.I didn't realize it was a little busy.He swallowed the noodles in two gulps, and followed the direction the girl and the boy were going to catch up with.He was full of displeasure, and when he strode after him, he didn't even know what it would be if he caught up.In fact, after he approached the two of them, he realized that the girl was not Xingzi at all.It's just that she's wearing the same skirt as Xingzi, and she's about the same size.Ji laughed at himself, and went back to the restaurant to pick up his bicycle. When he was using the key to lock the car, he felt that he suddenly understood how painful Xingzi was a few years ago.That pain he had just tasted in the three minutes he strode after someone. Jie never knew how Xingzi heard about him and Shuixiang.Until Xingzi went to college.When I sent her across the river, I stood on the side of the boat.He watched the two river gulls flying alternately at the stern, very light and cheerful.The surface of the river shone dazzlingly in the sun.Xingzi next to him seemed to be smeared with oil paint on his face because of the excitement of going to college, shining brightly, and he was impulsive, and he couldn't help blurting out: "Xingzi, I love you very much." Xingzi looked at him in surprise, his eyes became brighter, Xingzi said: "I used to love you very much." He said: "Now what?"Can it be like the past? Xingzi turned his face to the other side in the eager questioning.It's very embarrassing, but also quite sad.Is Xingzi's action his answer?I figured it out. Xingzi turned her face after a while and said how she knew that Xie had someone else to love, and before that, she thought who could occupy Xie's heart except her? I heard her tell about that part of the past when the boat was sailing on the river. It was almost a sad story in spring. Xingzi said that the warehouse had a power outage that day, and a group of girls they were working sat in the sun basking in the sun while waiting for electricity.Several girls took out the wool brought into the warehouse and knit sweaters.Xingzi suddenly felt that it was time for her to knit a sweater for Xie.Ji will spend his twentieth birthday in autumn.Xingzi quickly came up with an idea in his mind.She wants to knit a light gray sweater for him to celebrate his birthday.Xingzi decided to ask the experienced Zizi.Xingzi wants to ask, how much thread does it cost to weave a men's sweater, and how much is a catty of all-wool wool.A girl said that the number of lines depends on how tall the guy is.Xingzi said he was about 1.8 meters tall.The other girl smiled and said it was 粞, right?Then everyone else laughed.Xingzi also laughed, which was a kind of tacit consent.Everyone booed, saying that Xingzi would invite us to eat wedding candy earlier, and that they should try to give birth to a fat son for Xiao sooner, and that Xingzi and Xiao were really a natural couple.Xingzi was very happy in his heart, but he kept yelling don't make me happy, don't make me happy.When everyone was laughing hard, Shuixiang stood up slowly, staring at Xingzi intently.Xingzi is so strange.Shui Xiang approached her, and then said: "Xingzi, I hope you don't mind meddling with Ji's business." Xingzi said: "What does this have to do with you? What right do you have to say this to me?" Shui Xiang said, "Of course I have the right. Because my relationship with Ji has already been settled." Xingzi was stunned, and said, "What's the matter?" Shui Xiang said: "The relationship between lovers." Xingzi laughed and said, "Nonsense, do you think your boyfriend is crazy?" The other girls laughed too.The girls said one after another that Xingzi had been chosen long ago, why did you intervene?He also said it was very funny to rob men openly like this. Shui Xiang screamed at that moment, Shui Xiang said, "Shameless people are crazy about boyfriends. I told you that he wants to marry you? I told you that he loves you? Tell you, I am right I said it. I said he couldn’t please you, you are amazing. Being with you is too stressful and tiring. Only with me can I feel relaxed and happy. I haven’t even held hands with you. You are so beautiful that you consider him your boyfriend." As Shui Xiang spoke, she took out a photo of Pie, and on the back of the photo were written the words "For my dear Shui Xiang, Pie who loves you".Shuixiang said: "If you don't believe me, take a look." The girls passed it on, and they all said that this is really the case, so strange.Xingzi also brought it over to look at it.At that time, Xingzi couldn't support herself anymore. After looking at it numbly, she handed the photo to Shui Xiang.Xingzi insisted and said: "I and Ji are fine, they are just making fun of each other." Xingzi's complexion was pale, and his expression was a little dazed.She heard those girls still discussing, and she didn't understand why Xie dumped Xingzi and found Shuixiang instead.It is also said that it is good with Shuixiang, but on the other hand, he is playing with Xingzi's feelings. Xingzi can't sit still when he hears it.He got up shaking, said "I'm going to leave first." and left. It is Shuixiang who catches up with Xingzi.Shui Xiang said: "I can see that, in fact, you love Tiao." Then she asked Xingzi to let go of Tiao and stop pestering Tiao.She and Ji are already de facto husband and wife.Xingzi didn't understand what this meant, so he couldn't help repeating the phrase "in fact husband and wife".Shui Xiang blushed and said: "It's just that we have slept together. After Shui Xiang said this, she was a little excited, and she couldn't help it. He said in detail how he fell in love with her, how he hugged her, and how Kiss her tenderly. Shui Xiang said that they kissed for a long time, and then she couldn't do it anymore. He took her to the bed and took off her clothes. He also took off his own clothes. Shui Xiang talked about the relationship between the two in detail. How did she experience the first married life in her life. This was unheard of in Xingzi's past. Xingzi was horrified. When Shuixiang finished all that, they had already reached the gate of the warehouse, and a row of peach blossoms were in full bloom at the gate Brilliant. These brilliant peach blossoms are deeply imprinted in Xingzi's mind together with everything that Shui Xiang told. Xingzi didn't go to work for three days.Xingzi never questioned Ji, Xingzi thought she had no right to question him.Xingzi just felt that his heart was in pain, the pain was so painful, three days later, in Xingzi's eyes, it was another color. The boat arrived at the other side when Xingzi finished talking.Ji didn't say anything more.He thought that if he could wash away the peach blossoms in Xingzi's mind, he would be willing to pay the price.Before Jie could say anything, Xingzi said: "Even though I still love you, but if you show a little closeness to me, I will think of the peach blossoms and everything that Shui Xiang talked about with great relish." He was ashamed.He lowered his head. When Jie saw that the people on the boat got down on the barge one after another, he carried Xingzi's luggage on his back. As soon as he said the word "Let's go", he saw Xingzi's eyes filled with tears. After hesitating for a while, he still said: "I don't mind if you love me or not, you can love others as much as you want, but I ask you to allow me to love you." Xie's words were very gentle, and Xingzi's tears flowed down.Ji stared blankly at Xingzi, thinking, am I such a person? Just like Xingzi can't forget the peach blossom, he can't forget the sadness that appeared on Xingzi's face at that moment.