Chapter 10 I have thirty years

In 1966, a 50-year-old male senior engineer of a design institute in T City At the age of thirty-nine, he was designated as a high-level intellectual--at the age of forty, he was labeled as a "rightist" and rushed to the farm to dig out the dung--the hat was getting heavier every day--at the age of fifty, "the Cultural Revolution" was sent to his hometown in the countryside--he was foolishly fooled Landlord for ten years--began to implement policies at the age of 60--returned to the city at the age of 64--everything is complete--the dream of a 70-year-old I'm old, and when I get old, I will have more problems, and I like to chatter, so don't hate me.Do you think so? I'll say it if you don't.My whole life, where do I start?If we want to talk about the ten years of the "Cultural Revolution", we have to talk about the first ten years and the next ten years.Added together it is thirty years.Thirty years ago, the cause and effect were all connected together.

He was classified as a "rightist" at the age of 40, repatriated to his hometown at the age of 50, and returned to the city to retire at the age of 60.I am seventy this year. I left home to study at the age of fourteen, and started working at the age of twenty. From before liberation to after liberation, I have been engaged in railway design.In 1956, he was designated as a senior intellectual, considered an associate professor, and the government even issued a certificate.I know several professional knowledge and have practical experience, including construction and management. In addition, I was in the prime of life at that time, and I was the technical backbone of our design institute.This is not bragging, I have presided over the design and construction of several main railway lines.At that time, I was very energetic, and I was often so excited that I couldn't close my eyes at night.

The first thing happened in 1957, when I was only forty years old.A party secretary said to me: "Oh, you are an influential person in our unit. If you don't take the lead in releasing the sound, the movement in our academy will not be able to start!" I think so, let's let it go, and wrote a big-character poster , this is a bad thing.At that time, I had no opinion on the Party, and I really had nothing to say, and I knew in my heart not to talk nonsense.But I don't like some worker and peasant cadres in the courtyard.Because I have been working in this unit for the longest time, and I am considered a veteran. I know the origins of many people. They are not in our business at all. , in charge of people.A personnel cadre opened a letter of proof for me, and there were several typos in one line.I wrote these things in the big-character posters.This is so bad, when the big talk suddenly turned into "anti-rightist", they criticized me for "attacking the party's personnel policy", and said that I had anti-party remarks, saying that "the Zhangluo alliance is bold ", praising the "big rightists".How dare I say that, I just whispered to a colleague in private, "They are so courageous in opposing the party." When my colleagues exposed me, my meaning changed.Just this little thing made me a "rightist".

We have a total of 500 intellectuals, and at once we beat 88 "rightists", accounting for 17%.Of course, all of them were rehabilitated later, and they were all wrong cases.I couldn't figure it out at the time.I thought to myself, Chairman Mao said that "rightists" only accounted for one to three percent of the intellectuals, so how come there are eighty-eight out of five hundred.Fortunately, the punishment for me is not the heaviest.It's just that after being criticized and confessed, he was demoted from chief engineer to ordinary engineer, and his salary was reduced from 145.80 yuan to 127 yuan. This is considered first-class treatment among us "old rightists".But wearing a hat is always stressful.I didn't have much to say, but I thought that as long as I worked hard for two years, the hat would come off naturally, and it wouldn't get heavier, it would only get lighter.right!

Things are not what you think they are.The more serious it becomes.In the beginning, I was allowed to be the team leader in engineering, but later on I was only allowed to be in design.In 1959, the top issued another order, saying that all "rightists" were not allowed to do technical work, and all did manual labor.I went down to engage in geological exploration and worked as a worker to dig the ground.I worked hard on the construction site, and I couldn't shake off my "rightist" label.I worked on physical strength during the day, and called me to drive the night train at night to help with the design, no matter how tired I was. The design of the more than 1,000-kilometer railway in Zhangjiakou was completed by working night shifts for more than two months.At this time, it's not the worst. If you work the night shift, you can work the night shift, and you can still feel your major.

In 1963, a farm was set up in the courtyard, mainly planting rice.Isn’t it because of natural disasters that the supply of non-staple food is not available? This is called self-sufficiency.I was sent to work on the farm.Now I'm completely disconnected from my profession.At that time, most of the people who went together were "old rightists", and there were also counter-revolutionaries and bad elements. Anyway, they were all bad people.The dirtiest and most tiring job is to dig out the manure, drive the manure truck to the septic tank in the residential area, and then pull it to the farm.Among these people, I am the strongest, with a good body and a height of more than 1.8 meters.I took the initiative to ask "I will do it".After the feces are fermented in the septic tank, there is a thick layer of slurry floating on the top, and the bottom is soup.Spoon a ladle, dung splashed all over the face.I used my brain to transform the dung scoop, and made a launder with an iron plate, and installed it on the dung truck.In this way, the efficiency is doubled.Everyone on the farm likes me, and the young man even calls me Master.At this time, I heard that there were instructions from above to take off the hats of "rightists", and our academy divided them into three and a half indicators.I don't understand how to count the half. It is said that it is proportional and cannot reach four, so it is three and a half.Someone quietly told me that I was "on the list" this time.Don't mention how happy I was then, I worked harder.But no matter how much I waited, there was no movement.Later, I heard that because of the Lushan Conference, Peng Dehuai made a fuss, stopped taking off his hat, and started class struggle again.Someone posted a big-character poster on the farm, saying that the young people are not firm in their stand, have no clear boundaries, and are ganging up with the "rightists".No one cares about me anymore.I'm a bit disappointed, I thought I'd be able to take off my hat if I performed well.The hat should be getting lighter every day, but why is it getting heavier every day!

In the next year, the scientific research unit engaged in "going downstairs to leave the hospital", the door of the design room was locked, and everyone went to the construction site, making a lot of noise.A group of us "old right" also went.There are many tasks that others cannot do, and they still have to find me.For example, on a geological longitudinal map, there are only three lines at the end of the work.There is a policy not to call rightist GIFs, so they quietly called me in at night.I worked hard for more than 40 nights and drew more than 200 meters of cross-sections.The picture is taken out and my family applauds it. It is 2.5 mm to write a line imitating Song Dynasty characters, which is meticulous.Later, this picture became famous all over the hospital.In addition to working, drawing, and helping in the kitchen, washing dishes, washing vegetables, sweeping the floor, and pouring coal ash.Every morning before the master worker got up, we "Old Right" took a bucket and put the washing water at their door.All these tasks are done by us.The master said: "It's good that you are here, we are relaxed." At that time, a leader told me that he should consider taking off my hat.His air was not trying to deceive me.But this time before I could cheer up, the "Cultural Revolution" came.Alas, looking at this momentum, the matter of taking off the hat is hopeless.

We went to the design institute from the construction site, where the "Cultural Revolution" had already started.The Cultural Revolution Committee was established, and there was a group of shouting thugs called "Death Squads to Defend the Red Regime", all of whom were young and vigorous.In our residential area, many high-level intellectuals were copied, dictatorship, and sent to the cowshed as ghosts and monsters. There were more than a dozen suicides, including those who jumped into rivers, jumped off buildings, and wiped their necks.I wasn't picked out at first.Firstly, I have been reforming honestly and not attracting their attention; secondly, I have the experience of Chairman Mao's instructions on "two factories and one school", saying that "rightists" like me who retain their jobs and salaries belong to in-situ reformation and should be treated differently. , not to be sent back home.I thought that if I squinted while working like this, I would be fine.

On September 2, 1968, I was cooking a big stove with another station engineer in the kitchen.Five stoves, it's hot, and I'm working hard with bare pounds, when suddenly a few members of the "guard team" came and said, "Take your things and come with us!" I thought something was about to happen. .Did not dare to say anything, and went with them. As soon as they entered the threshold, they gave them a push and said: "Apologize to Chairman Mao!" A portrait of Chairman Mao was attached to the facing wall.I think, to apologize is to bow, and there are "three bows" in a row.A young man came up and slapped me across the face, saying, "You don't even know how to apologize!" I hurriedly bowed twice.Not yet.It was only later that I learned that an even-numbered pleading should be made.Three or five will not work.We "old rightists" have never been allowed to participate in criticism meetings. How do we understand this rule, and how do we make it clear? This is locked in the "cowshed".

That afternoon, I was dragged to criticize, and a sign was hung around my neck, which said "Old Rightist".There are also three "counter-revolutionaries" criticizing and fighting on the same stage. In fact, they mainly fight against others, and I am accompanying them.I think I'm at least a supporting role.But at the end of the conference, it was suddenly announced that my whole family would be sent back to their hometown.I was stunned, thinking this is coming, how come it came so fast. The next day, a leader came and asked me to explain: "What good things do you have in your house? Tomorrow the house will be confiscated." I said: "There is nothing good!" He said: "Any high-end materials, high-end clothing, high-end tableware, gold and silver jewelry , deposits.” I said, “Do you want anything else?” He said, “I want these.” This leader is still the chief of the security department in our unit.But it will not be so serious when the house is ransacked the next day.A truck drove up and moved up the things it saw, even the broken ones.That night my father was so frightened that he hanged himself.

They notified me two days later, and I said, "How can I die if I'm fine." They said, "I committed suicide in fear of crime." I was angry and said, "What crime are you afraid of?" They said that I contradicted them, Said: "I have cut myself off from the people." I had nothing to say, so I asked them for leave, and I wanted to send my father to the crematorium.They said: "You are dishonest, you dare to talk and move!" They immediately fought me a big meal.After the fight, I was asked to write an inspection, but in the end I was still not allowed to send my father to die.When the corpse was burned, my eldest child went there.The ashes were not brought back.At that time, there were many dead people, and the crematorium could not burn them. Everyone bought a three-yuan box and put it next to the corpse. They wrote their names in chalk on the box.So many corpses were burned collectively, and the burned ashes were not allowed to belong to anyone, just put them in after finishing the work.Hey, forget about it then.Anyway, I'm sure it's my father's ashes, and if I take them back to my hometown and bury them under my mother's grave, won't I be fine?But our whole family was deported, and no one took it.In 1978, I came back to implement the policy, and the next day I rushed to the crematorium.I was greeted by a few little girls. After hearing what I said, they were very excited. They helped me search through it, and finally found it.At that time, there is no foundation for people to die. On September 8th, they brought a truck, and a dozen men in red hoops escorted me home. What’s the name of the house? The four corners are all gone. My father hanged himself at home, which scared me so much that my old child cried every day. , When I saw it, I cried even more.I didn't even mention my mood at the time.A few days later, the big truck came again.Three strong men escorted our whole family. My wife, my five children and I were sent back to our hometown in Hunan.That place is only a dozen miles away from Chairman Mao's hometown. I found out later that when I was cooking the stove, they took a family photo of me and went to my hometown to contact me about repatriation.When I met with the production team, people in the material said they didn't know each other when they looked at the photos. Some old people said that this old man (my father) knew him.This brings me here.But when I left home when I was fourteen, no one recognized me, and everything in the house was gone long ago.The village didn't like us coming.There is little land and many people, all of which are paddy fields, with a total of 132 mu of paddy fields and 132 people.According to the head of a person, one acre of land.There are seven of us when we come here, and we have to eat several thousand catties of grain a year. Where do we come from? Repatriation is the policy of the central government.The people who escorted us went to the county party committee, made a fuss, made a fuss, and forced us down.But the production team put forward a condition, saying that we had no place to live and no food to eat when we went.It's September, isn't it? How can we distribute food if we don't participate in labor?Our design institute is a large unit, and we promised to pay for the construction of three thatched huts with adobe thatched roofs.Two hundred yuan for the same room, six hundred yuan, and six yuan a month for each of us for living expenses. For seven months, six seven forty-two times the number of seven people, two hundred and ninety-four yuan, and the county Two squares of timber were approved to build the house.This is a very preferential treatment, but the living expenses are not given to us.Hand over to the production team.The production team can get a small fortune, and Ken accepts it.In the end, my house was not built at all, and the pig house was hastily rebuilt, and the cadres of the production team replaced all the good wood. Within five minutes of my arrival home, the Minister of Armed Forces of the commune and the militia battalion commander of the brigade arrived with two fully armed militiamen, and told the seven members of my family to put down their things, stand in a row, and give a lecture.The first sentence says, you are a landlord.Oops, I thought to myself that I am a "rightist" and how can I become a "landlord element" again.I later learned that there are no "rightists" in the countryside, and they can't hate them. Landlords are the worst, so they call me "landlord elements".I dare not ask too much.The landlord is the landlord.This is another ten years as a landlord. It's okay for me to be a landlord, but my children are called rich children.You can't join the militia, you can't participate in rallies, and you can't go to school.I didn't go to school until the "Cultural Revolution" was over. The Minister of Armed Forces said, remember well, the first is not to talk nonsense, the second is not to be wronged, and the third is to register and report the visitors at home first, ah! I also want to open the rich anti-corruption four Class molecules will.Meetings are not difficult, only once a month.When they arrive, they roll their names first, and the security chief sits on the top and says, "Hey, please report. If there's anything wrong, let's talk about it yourself." He is very well informed.For these four types of elements, what did you do yesterday, and what happened to you that day, let me give you a lesson.I'm pretty good, basically never scolded.My transformation attitude has always been the best.Not bragging, later asked me to be the leader of the four types of elements, reading newspapers.Rural people don't know how to read newspapers, so of course I can. How can a senior engineer not know how to read newspapers and ask me to bring an "apology".Sorry about this stuff, I'm more experienced, bows should be in even numbers, right? When the "rightists" get nothing to eat in the countryside.That substance is unimaginable in a big city.Here, one person has one mu of land. At that time, one mu was only 800 catties, which was early rice and late rice.From it, public grain, seed grain, feed grain, and super-yield grain must be taken out, and the rest will be gone.The commune stipulates 200 catties of basic rations, and these 200 catties are gross grain, and only 70% of it will be paid, and anything else will be counted as work points.A strong labor force can work up to 500 workers a year.You are not enough, the poor and lower-middle peasants are not enough to eat.Thanks to my training as an "old rightist", I am capable. I can do six hundred jobs a year, but it is enough for my wife and children to share. As for money, it is even more difficult, and there is no source at all.Your work points can be settled at most one hundred yuan a year.But I have a lot of children, and I still have to use money to buy rations. If I deduct them, I will lose them all, and I still have to owe them.The four types of molecules cannot be owed.If you can't owe, you still owe in the end.In the countryside, the first thing to do is to improve the relationship between people, and everything will be easy to handle.I know a little bit of medicine, and I know a few acupuncture, moxibustion, and cupping.If this ingredient is not good, nothing will happen.Ear acupuncture can be pricked, but heart acupoints cannot be pricked casually, I am optimistic about both.Generally, headaches and colds can be cured by twisting them.If you don't need to pay for medical treatment, wouldn't you have a good relationship with others?There is another one. When I went to the countryside, I saw that farmers had to raise pigs if they wanted some money, but when swine fever came, things would go wrong immediately.I found a veterinarian as a teacher, and the only thing I needed was penicillin, and I injected it two fingers wide behind the pig's ear; it was fine soon.There is only one veterinarian in the commune. The place is so big that one person cannot walk there. If any pig is sick, I will be called to go.I send some money to friends in the city to buy medicine and send it.Penicillin for human use is also available, and it’s cheap. It costs one dime or eight cents for 800,000 units, and you can buy ten or twenty sticks at a time.People call me to go at night at night, and call me to go in the morning in the morning. It is much better to deal with people this way.Later, the branch secretary of the brigade and the security director all smiled at me.After I have repeatedly stated, I am a "rightist", not a "landlord".They held a meeting for me in 1975 and announced that I was no longer a landlord.This is tantamount to half the implementation.Rural people don't know what "rightist" is or is not "rightist". My technology is completely useless.You have strengths, but people talk about the class line.Once, when repairing a levee, the soil was dug well, and rollers were required.Such a big wheel, if you pull it on one side, he pulls it on the other side, if you can’t pull it, I’ll tell you that you’re not working hard enough, so let me make a joke, okay?I have worked on railways, and I have done this on bridges and piers on site.As soon as I called: "Pull-up-come-ah!"' Pull it up together with all your strength, which is fine.At this time, there was a team leader who was a party member. He suddenly remembered, no, we can’t listen to him. We poor and lower-middle peasants can’t let the class enemy command us.alright, that's fine.But people want to use it if they have the ability, don't they?In 1973, the secretary of our commune wanted to build a reservoir. He thought that Hua Guofeng was the secretary of a prefectural party committee in Hunan. He built an irrigation canal and became famous. Chairman Mao transferred him to the central government.He called people to dig under a big mountain, build a dam, store water, and build a reservoir.I saw that there was no water source.He said that the rain was pouring down the mountain.I said this is called "catchment area", it is not big enough.Besides, if it doesn't rain, isn't there no water?He said that there is still spring water coming up. I think it’s too bad, so I said that there is a horizontal relationship. The amount of water diverted is directly proportional to the water pressure of this mountain. If you hold you down, your water will not be sent up. Lah, if he doesn’t understand, he has to cultivate, so I dare not talk about it, because if I talk about it again, it will be sabotage.It is unclear how much work and how many years it took for this useless reservoir.There is no need to talk about whether you are useful or not, and I don't ask you to talk at all.The more capable you are, the more things you can do to them. I dare say that I have never done anything bad in my life, and I have made contributions to the national railway.Make me like this, but I always think that the Communist Party can't always do this to an honest person.When I was first sent to the countryside, I was fifty years old, and I still thought that one day I would be called to work.It's okay to wait another twenty years.I'm fine.This will wait until the "Gang of Four" is over.I am sixty years old, it is time for me to contribute to the country. To implement the policy, you have to rely on yourself.The 11th document in early 1978 has come down.I waited at home for three months, waiting and waiting, why didn't there be any movement.I have to take my hat off first, don't I.I have worn this hat for more than 20 years, and I feel that it is overwhelming.Wait, wait, I said I won't wait.I ran to the brigade, and the brigade captain supported me and gave me a certificate. Without this certificate, I can't mess around, so I still have to obey the rules, right?I took the certificate and ran to the commune. The commune disagreed and was afraid of taking responsibility. I said I didn’t ask you to write anything else. The certificate was issued by the brigade.The secretary is not bad, just give a stamp and I will be back. At this time, the party secretary, the director of the political department, and the elders in the courtyard were all old people.But they all went up again.I returned to the Design Institute on May 21, and they were very polite.The secretary said, your implementation of the policy is the first step in our hospital, wait a minute, heh, you should live in the guest house first.Anyway, it’s okay to stay here, so I ran every day. The Organization Department of the Municipal Party Committee and the United Front Work Department urged the hospital to implement it for me.I don't think there is a reason why I can't go back, so I went down until the end of August.Unexpectedly, they pressed me first and told me to "reinstate and retire".I was anxious, and I said, "I'm only sixty, I'm good, I can still do it, can I not retire?" I also said, "You are my old boss, you don't know if I can do it." He hurried Said: "Of course you are capable, and you are very successful at work, but I will tell you the truth. You will not be able to manage if you don't retire." You have to stay in the countryside forever.What's the use of not working after being reinstated? I just want to work.But I can't help it.My family must come back. The organization gave me a conclusion.It is roughly written like this: "The remarks made by Comrade XX during the Anti-Rightist period were basically about certain specific issues. There is a mistake in the sentence 'Zhangluo Alliance is bold', but if it is not pursued, it is not enough to be a rightist." Conclusion Attached to the file, ask me to sign after reading and agreeing.I looked through the files and saw, alas, none of the messy exposing materials could be put on the table.There are not only speculations, but also random fabrications.For example, a branch secretary, who was an intern under me at the time, said that I had "linked with more than 30 people from many departments to unite against the Party" because I did not reuse him.Which departments and which people are connected in series are Zhang San, Li Si, and Wang Ermazi, why didn't he write it! The person in charge of implementing the policy said: "You see if you want to get this conclusion, sign it if you want it, and forget it." You can't not sign, and you can't take off your hat without signing.Still can't do anything with a hat on.In order to take off my hat, I have worked hard for thirty years.I took out a pen and wrote: "I agree with the conclusion part".He laughed and said: "You intellectuals have a lot of minds after all." They don't remove all the untrue words of "anti-rightist" and say that you still have mistakes, but they leave you a little tail, a little pigtail, lest you get arrogant.When you get angry, they lose their air, right? Take off the hat, I want to go back to say good news first.Ask the courtyard to borrow some money. My son is getting married during the Spring Festival.It costs a lot of money to ask for a wife in the countryside.They say study research.I didn't come to me until a few days before the Spring Festival, and said, "Don't borrow this money, I will return your money to you!"I have 127 yuan a month, and the "Cultural Revolution" lasted for ten years, a total of more than 15,000 yuan, and when it was given to me, it was more than 14,000 yuan.It turned out that they sent someone to my hometown to investigate how much money I earned in the countryside, and deducted it.It is said that there is no policy for the money deducted by the rightists, and it has not been paid up to this day.When I think about this, I still feel that I have a shadow of a rightist in myself, so let's forget about it.I took the money and ran back.Alas, people in the village see me as more than a hundred yuan a month, and they regard me as a big shot, and they all come to my house to visit.But I ran back soon, and I didn't know whether I was asked to go back or not.It's been a long, long time.For a while, I heard that it was going to be frozen. I was anxious and looked for people everywhere. It dragged on until 1980. The municipal committee issued a document stipulating: "In principle, all those who have been unjustly, falsely and wrongly convicted and repatriated to their hometowns must return, except those who have married in the local area. Those who have children." My eldest son and eldest daughter are married and cannot come back.The rest of the five made a fuss for a while, and finally the municipal party committee kept making phone calls to ask questions, and our hospital director said, "It will be done soon", "It will be done soon".It wasn't until June that I got the residence registration certificate, but I didn't have a house, and it was already November when I moved.At this time I was sixty-four years old.After all, the ears are not good, the eyes are not good, and the legs are much worse.From 1957 to now, I can contribute so much, but in fact, I can only contribute a little.My question is like the old saying in our hometown, "Carrying straw on a rainy day--the more you carry the heavier it is." If it is implemented, you will not be asked to do anything.Up to now, I can only do some accounting for the street food store.I'm having a hard time at home.The street asked me: "Can you do it?" I said: "I worked out the budget for the railway construction back then, and such a simple thing was not enough. I am a senior engineer!" They all laughed.I don't know what they were laughing at. Those who were captains and team leaders back then were all trained by me, and now they are all engaged in overall design.Compared with me, their brains are new, but the disadvantage is that they are not comprehensive enough. They have not done any new roads, road maintenance, bridge construction at the construction site, and they do not know other types of work.But as long as they design something new, I'm still very happy.I want to catch up with them. How good it is now! When I say this, people don’t believe it. I often dream at night, making designs on the boards and planting red flags on the spot.This has been the case for many years.I have never been pessimistic. As long as my old man is capable for a day, no matter what he does, he will always be happy.That's right!Sometimes I think, whoever has the ability can tell me to start again at the age of forty.I can figure it out, I can, can you believe it? ***The setting sun wants to use its last light to illuminate the world. ***