Chapter 61 Hollow Terror - Eternal Wandering

The carefree hunter hunts the mountains for meaning and lives a respectable life.One unlucky day came when he was chasing a beautiful antelope over the hills of the Black Forest, and fell off a precipice, bleeding to death.This seems like a pretty common story.Something unusual happened later: the hunter didn't really die, and the sailboat that was supposed to sail on the Styx stayed in the mundane river.Day after day, month after month, year after year, the hunter Graccus lived in a lonely boat; he was wrapped in a shroud, lying on the floor, thinking carefully about the misfortunes he had encountered during his lifetime. ——I lost my way to the other shore, and I got on such a small boat by mistake.This reflection on earthly life haunted him.Over the long years, everything around him made him gradually understand that no one will help him, and he can only survive alone.To be in his situation is to be outside the circle of human life; those inside cannot see him, cannot find him, let alone understand him—because no one has ever died once, so to a dead man I'm not interested in things.In this aimless boat, driven only by the wind in the depths of Hades, life loses its everyday meaning, leaving only isolated and vague desires.All the Hunter has left to do than think "that" over and over again is the constant feeling of "I'm here."Yes, "I'm here", "I" don't know everything else; "I" don't know whether I should stay in Riva City or go to the other shore, that's beyond what "I" can know.How familiar and how strange is the southern wind blowing in from the hole!

What the hunter Graccus faced was the most difficult situation for human beings—he wanted to live, but he couldn’t die.The large hanging staircase leading to heaven buried all the worldly desires in his heart, but heaven was out of reach. All he could do was to climb up and down on the huge ladder, in constant motion.Maybe his death was really a mistake that made him never get rid of it.But how can a hunter resist the temptation of antelope?People who pursue the meaning of life will inevitably end up in this fate.The world is vast and the people are numerous, but he disappeared from the crowd.His concerns were no longer the concerns of the people, and he was permanently cut off.Adrift, anything but adrift is adrift, alone.The captain who made an alliance with death couldn't stay with him all the time, and finally left him first; Riva, the hometown of death, was not a place to stay for a long time, because he was still alive here; The body can no longer move; and heaven, there is absolutely no part of him.So the hunter, who died once, traveled around the world in his humble cabin.What is he doing in the boat?He was thinking about "that". "That thing" is about death, and people don't think about it, only the hunter does.The hunter clearly sees the world full of it, from textbooks to skyscrapers; from mothers nursing babies in their arms to lovers in embrace; from passengers at train windows to primitive men to stars, lakes, melting snow on mountaintops And the creek flowing down the mountain is the embodiment of "that thing".But "that thing" cannot be expressed in words.The hunter lying in the boat approaches "that thing" by asking himself questions.This self-amusing game of questioning and answering has been going on, helping him pass the monotonous and long time.

The life course of a hunter is the course of all those who pursue the highest spirit but cannot sever their marriage with the world.Such a person is destined to be in a dilemma.Their little boat of misery is doomed to drift forever on an unknown river. May 20, 1998, Yingcai Garden