Chapter 5 chapter Five

Emotion with friends of the same sex is an extremely dangerous force, and Ms. Daier always thinks so.This requires them to deeply appreciate, love, respect and be moved by each other.At the same time, there must be a kind of non-spiritualized natural attributes that are not exclusive or even loved.The most unstable and reliable thing between them is trust.This kind of emotion can develop quite deep, selfless, full of self-sacrifice, and even no one can do without another, but at the same time it is so fragile that it will collapse at the touch of a blow.If you are not careful, you will slide to the brink of collapse in an instant.In the dark, there is a thin layer of paper between the emotions of two people. If this emotion is slightly deviated, it will become impossible to survive.For example, if appreciation turns to jealousy, and love turns to morbidity, then this thin paper will be smashed in an instant; and if there is no thin paper between two cultured women, then there will be nothing, there will be no existence .Therefore, Dai Er has always regarded the development of emotions between the same sex as playing with fire.All these complications and dangers do not exist with friends of the opposite sex.

Miao Yi and Mai San lived together and got married successively. Dai Er fully realized how powerful the power of matter and body is, and how fragile the power of spirit and soul is in the materialized world. The former is simple after all, while the latter It's complicated.People who overemphasize the latter are the most troublesome and unlucky people in the world.Dai Er thought sadly that she was destined to belong to the most troublesome and unlucky person.Miss Dai Er's heart was in a mess, her emotions piled up in every possible direction, she felt indescribably lonely and melancholy.

Before going abroad, Ms. Dai Er's shopping enthusiasm was vigorous. She usually doesn't like to go shopping blindly, unlike many women who can spend two hours in the store without wanting to buy anything.Most of the time, she goes straight to the "theme" and glances at the counters of clothing, artwork, and books, and ignores other items.However, on the eve of going abroad, Ms. Dai Er seemed to be a shopaholic. She bought everything she saw and wanted to buy everything she would wear and use in her life. She bought more than a dozen bras alone.Ms. Dai Er is thin and thin. She thinks that people in the northeastern cities of the United States are all tall and big, so maybe they can't buy the model she needs.So I bought even more desperately.

It goes without saying that Miss Dai Er and her mother must have had a life-and-death farewell.She went to the individual booth and bought a beautiful card, which was filled with the most appropriate and comforting words for a mother who suddenly became unsure of what to do in the face of a long separation: dear mom: Now our life together has changed, but this is the beginning of hope, not the end of hope.Our purpose is to be together, not apart.The current state is temporary. As soon as I get married, I will pick you up and reunite. It would be foolish of you to cry and cry after I left. It is wise to adjust your life to a state of health, briskness, fulfillment and pursuit at the same time, which is what I hope for my mother.

In fact, I am very rational about my choice. When I am alone, no matter what difficulties I encounter, I will cry, but I am by no means the kind of person who cries stupidly. I will find a way to solve it. I have the ability to overcome my weaknesses and overcome Loneliness fills up the boredom.We always have to live, just live happily. I will pick up my mother within a year.wait for me. love you Dai Er Miss Dai Er quietly locked the card in her drawer and waited for the day when she flew out of Beijing. Before leaving the house, she left the drawer key, the house key and all the warm or sad memories she had of her home to her mother. , and wandered the world since then...

The last breakup between Miss Dai Er and Miao Yi was somewhat depressing.At that time, Miao Yi had been living with "So-and-so's son" for a long time.Dai Er heard the news from Mur Fei and Mai San suddenly.That "so-and-so's son" Dai Er had already climbed over the enemy's bunker, and was running rampant in the cultural and art circles, bluffing and deceiving.Those scholars, singers, movie stars, etc. who want to be famous and successful must first go to him to worship him, otherwise they will not be able to succeed.Dai Er is extremely disappointed with Miao Yi's choice, not entirely because of cohabiting with a doggy man like him, but more because Dai Er feels that Miao Yi is covering up and hiding her, which makes their deep friendship crack.She always thought that Miao Yi talked about everything to her.Miao Yi's behavior shakes Dai Er's established belief in friendship.But Dai Er quickly adjusted her emotions to a position of tolerance and understanding. After all, Miao Yi has her difficulties, her own unspeakable secrets, and her hard-to-tell sufferings.She drifted to Beijing from a small town in the far north, and the difficult situation left her with no choice but to be "so-and-so's son".Dai Er is very aware of Miao Yi's past. Dai Er feels that she has lived too long in that harsh environment where she was always on the defensive against others. The instinct of self-preservation (selfishness) and the root system of absorbing the outside (others) are particularly developed.She gives and gives very little because she has never felt secure.Now, Miao Yi's act of seeking the protection of "so-and-so son" at her own expense is actually a continuation of something she has formed for a long time.Dai Er quickly understood all this, and explained to Mai San and Murphy the difficulties in this world.But Dai Er is doomed to be unable to shake off a certain kind of disappointment.From Miao Yi, Dai Er sees the ultimate weakness of women.

That day, Dai Er sent Miao downstairs.At night, the sky is full of stars, the sky is deep, it is quiet, and the autumn is harmonious.They stood downstairs under the starry sky, and Miao Yi was talking about something.The moon hangs quietly in the sky.They stood facing each other, and the autumn wind slowly fluttered Dai Er's melancholy black hair on her shoulders, Miao Yi's coat tied in his belt was also blown by the night wind, Dai Er felt a little cold, so she crossed her arms and hugged her. In front of her chest, staring at Miao Yi, Miao Yi's perpetually gloomy beauty and the lethargy shown for a life without love infect Dai Er, but besides understanding, what else can Dai Er give her?

"You will forget me, in the modern world like America." Miao Yi said. "No." Dai Er said. "I let you down?" Dai Er turned her head to one side. "..." They stood still and said nothing more.The stars and the rain are gone, separation is imminent, the remembrance of the past and the bewilderment of the future engulf them, Dai Er suddenly feels an inexplicable fear, from Miao Yi's expression, Dai Er sees that she is swelling up. A kind of courage to go to Dai Er, to lean on Dai Er, that is the last farewell.Dai Er inexplicably felt a kind of timidity, she turned around, took a step back, and said, "Don't!"

With just this one word, Dai Er threw Miao Yi a thick and impenetrable wall. Obviously, Miao let out a sigh of relief, as if letting go of the weight of her body, she pulled herself out of the conflict, stood for a while, then turned around and left, in order to ease the embarrassment, she said "It's so annoying"!Dai Er was filled with guilt and guilt, feeling lost and didn't know what to say.She said to herself in her heart: You are really a fucking Chinese woman. Dai Er, Mai San, and Mur Fei couldn't say goodbye, and they traveled to other provinces to get married.Dai Er knew that if she could say goodbye to them, it would not be as heavy as saying goodbye to Miao Yi. Mai San said to Dai Er more than once: "When I go abroad in the future, when I fly off the ground in Beijing, guess what? What would happen to me? I would just take one last look at the ashen blue sky in Beijing, and then yell out loud——”

"What?" Mo Fei asked urgently. "——one word." Everyone knew what that word was, so they all laughed happily. In fact, God knew how much Mai San couldn't do without Murphy, and couldn't do without so many things on this land.She's just good at dreaming the American Dream, and she's done it quite professionally. Dai Er also imagined what would happen when she bid farewell to Beijing.According to Dai Er's understanding of her own nature, she felt that she would cry in her heart and smile on her face.In order to avoid the final parting scene, she would rather leave without saying goodbye to anyone and sneak away.

However, when it was time to fly away from Beijing, Miss Dai Er was furious with her mother, who kept telling her to wear them, wishing her to wear them all over the north and south poles and the equator in spring, summer, autumn and winter. On the body.It's early winter, a troublesome season. The silver-gray Boeing 747 is like an anxious lover embracing the East Pacific Ocean.Along the way, Dai Er took off and took off, performing a striptease for the high-nosed and green-eyed people.