Chapter 51 Life Parasitic on a Notebook

Life Parasitic on a Notebook Feng Tang Because of a tragic experience, I didn't like pens since I was a child. When I was in elementary school, I taught brush calligraphy. The teacher who taught the class was a man with split heads, a soft waist, and long eyelashes. Now I think it must be "glass", and he can write a good thin gold body.Computer printers do not yet exist, and Pang Zhonghua's name is as loud as Yu Qiuyu and Han Han now.My brother said, you are as thin as a reed stick. It is difficult to be a muscular man in this life. You can write good handwriting, read books and see bad eyesight. Awesome, and more considerate of my innate conditions.Therefore, I am determined to practice calligraphy well.However, there is a boy in the class, no matter how I practice, his handwriting is obviously better than mine.He imitated Liu Gongquan, I imitated Yan Zhenqing, read his handwriting, think of famous mountains and great rivers, read mine, use your imagination, think of Shu Tong, if you don’t use your imagination, you will basically be pork buns, big fat girls and other fat things.I have changed brushes many times, such as eight sheep and two wolves, seven sheep and three wolves, six wolves and four sheep, seven wolves and three sheep. I heard that "wolves" are actually rabbit fur. The more wolves there are, the less sheep there are, and the harder the pen is. , the more straight the handwriting is, but it is useless to me, even with the Quanlanghao pen, the handwriting I write is still like a fat man.Concluded that the pen can't make me awesome.When I was in junior high school, I started to write novels. I was in a state of narcissism, and the novels were more than 100,000 words long.The three immortal fountain pens that I wrote were broken, and the first interphalangeal joint of the middle finger of the right hand was callused, deformed, permanently drooping, stretched out to make obscene gestures, and there was no arrogance at all.In the process of writing the broken pen, the buttocks have also flattened and mossed, and no matter how long I stand, I can't recover a little bit of curve.The novel manuscript was named and sent to a magazine called "Middle School Student Literature" when I was seventeen years old. A month later, the magazine closed down.Come to the conclusion that the pen is bad luck to me and that I better forget about writing novels.Seventeen years later, it was published in "Fiction World" and won a manuscript fee of 7,000 yuan. If it had happened seventeen years ago, my fate would have changed completely.Seventeen years later, I found out that I had hemorrhoids, which were also caused by the three eternal life pens. I sat for a long time and had blood stasis. , the laws of nature came true as scheduled, and my fate has not changed in the slightest.

Because of my superstitious belief in machines, I am obsessed with laptops. The earliest contact with laptops was at Peking University. In 1991, I took a course, "Computer Working Principles and 286 Chips". The teacher's hobby is international ballroom dancing. He said that laptops basically do not exist in China. There is a laptop in China, which is very cool and awesome.Before, I was exposed to computers in middle school, with monochrome green screens and sparkling ghost lights. You have to take off your shoes when entering the computer room, and there is a mixed smell of feet, socks, and shoes in the room.For the first time in my life, I understand that girls' feet may also be smelly, and beautiful girls' feet may also be smelly. In this regard, girls are different from flowers.My sister is already in the United States, and she can go to school and live without serving dishes. She promised me that during college, she would help me travel around China. I said, let me give me a notebook.In an elective course at Peking University, my teacher and I repeatedly discussed how to carry a laptop from the United States through customs.We discussed the methods used by silver soldiers in the Qing Dynasty to entrain Kuyin and drug dealers in entraining heroin. We felt that it was basically an asshole movement, inhumane, and the notebook was too large to be suitable.Another reference object is the smuggling of cultural relics. The computer teacher said that he has been to New York and the Metropolitan Museum. There are dozens of Northern Wei Buddha statues as tall as two people, which are larger than notebooks, but they were all shipped out of China during the Qing Dynasty. At that time customs, corruption.My sister said that she is very strong. Five years ago, she was able to use my engraved Qingtian stone unit official seal to deceive her into going abroad. Five years later, she was able to bring her laptop back to China without any tricks.It is a Toshiba SATTELITE series, Intel 486 chip, 33 MHz main frequency, 4 MB memory, Microsoft Windows 3.2 operating system, 12-inch black and white LCD screen, the mouse is like an ear, and it needs to be plugged on the right side of the fuselage.When I turned it on for the first time, the small room was pitch black, and I felt a crystal lotus lamp lit up in front of my eyes.My brother is also there, asking, can I watch a movie?Can I listen to music?It's still a black and white screen, and I can't tell the difference between face, tits and ass when watching porn.My sister said that the one with a color screen is too expensive, and the black and white one costs two thousand dollars. After I bought it, I only had twenty dollars left in my pocket. After thinking about it, I still bought it.

I started growing on my laptop.Notebooks are better than girls. Most girls need you to help her bear all kinds of psychological miscellaneous, and notebooks will help you bear all kinds of psychological miscellaneous.Notebooks get old, too, and the "N" and "I" keys quickly wear down to a whiteboard in my hands, but the notebook doesn't complain.Notebooks can also help you solve physical problems and regulate hormone levels, but they basically don't force you to blame yourself, hit your head against the wall, or think about life.Laptops have also changed from generation to generation, more regular than my girlfriend, basically one model every three years. After the black and white screen Toshiba, I have used the following models: Tongfang, Sony PCG505, Compaq Armada M300, Compaq Evo N600C, IBM Thinkpad T41, Hp compaq nc4010.The time spent on the notebook is much longer than the time spent on my girlfriend and parents. When the computer is turned on and Word is started, immortality is more real than the moonlight in front of the window. My heart is nameless and swollen, and my fingers tremble slightly. The keyboard is just the keys, like a wizard in the Xia, Shang and Zhou dynasties, his body was instantly occupied by a stronger force, his fingers undulated like running water, and the words danced on the screen like small fish and shrimp.I forgot that outside the house, the sun is warm in Lantian, the jade is full of smoke, and the flowers are blooming on the Moshang. The girl's hands are softer and smoother than the words, and the girl's eyes are brighter than the words.After a few days, I lit a cigarette and rechecked those words, basically useless, no business, not as good as the girl after the event, her hands are smooth and her eyes are bright, those moon-like things are all illusions, all young people entered A trap dug by God.The hemorrhoids are still there, and there is a tendency to develop from internal hemorrhoids to external hemorrhoids. The shoulders and back are basically finished. The doctor said that the cervical spine is dangerous, and it takes half a year to take pictures to observe the progress. These are not illusions.

I recently bought a Dopod 900, a PDA mobile phone, and the size of an aluminum lunch box commonly used by girls, which can barely fit into a trouser pocket.Texas Instruments has a main frequency of 500 megabytes, 128 megabytes of memory, a 3.6-inch TFT screen, a full-size QWERTY keyboard, Wi-Fi, Bluetooth, infrared, GSM, and W-CDMA.I heard from the girl that the man with a small penis uses a huge mobile phone and drives a Hummer jeep.I said, I lost my stature a few years ago, and my penis is not big at all. After a while, I can’t write articles, and my brain will gradually shrink.This laptop-like mobile phone uses a 1G SD memory card. I think that a lifetime of text can't take up one-thousandth of its space, which can hold much more than an urn.When there were too many ashes, they were scattered into Longtan Lake, which used to be called Longxugou, near the Temple of Heaven. I used to fish when I was a child.The words are scattered into those laptops. In a few hundred years, whether they can be smoother and brighter than the girls' hands and eyes, and whether they can capture the soul depends on their own creation.