Chapter 20 completely liberated

The previous section was titled "Half Liberation" and this one is "Full Liberation".What I write is baseless.Neither term is scientific or legal, and the line between them is not clear.Let jurists or philosophers explore it. Still talking about my situation.After returning to school, I had a surge of excitement.In this burst of excitement, we all lived on the thirty-fifth floor.It seems that according to a new spirit, maybe a new regulation, the offices of each department are set up in the student dormitories, presumably to get close to the students so that they can "go to (university), manage (university of science), improve (build a university)"The essence of education, management, and reform is to put teachers and old intellectuals under the management and reform of students, and encourage junior students to compile textbooks for senior grades.And so on, and so on.

There are four floors on the thirty-fifth floor.Girls live on the third and fourth floors, and boys live on the first and second floors.Several rooms were vacated on the second floor, which were the party and government offices of the department.These offices have nothing to do with me.I was assigned to a very small room with large glass windows on the left side of the entrance on the first floor. This is the concierge of this building. My job is to be the concierge. The task is to page the phone, and the third task is to send and receive letters and newspapers.The first task is neither difficult nor difficult.The leader told me: Don't let other people enter the building.The teaching staff in this department are all "old comrades", and I know them all.The senior students also agree with each other.New students are not sure.Do I know who the idlers are?Since I don't know each other, there is nothing I can do, so I just ignore it and let it go.Isn't it difficult and not difficult?

The second task is also difficult but not difficult.It's not difficult because I answer the phone when there is a phone call; if there is no phone call, I just sit around.Where is the difficulty?According to my statistics, it seems that girls have a lot of phone calls, and I have to climb up to the third and fourth floors every time I call. This is a very good "stair climbing exercise" introduced by many experts; It is difficult for any physical exercise expert to do.I climbed a few times, but I didn't think it would work, so I went downstairs outside the door and shouted upwards.This method has a certain effect.But the female students who live in the north-facing room are not easy to hear.It also caused a little trouble.My ability is like this, if there is trouble, let it be trouble.

As for the third task, it is very easy.When the newspaper came, I went upstairs and took it to the office.When the letter came, I accepted it and put it on the window sill outside the glass window for the receiver to pick it out. In the case of completing these three tasks, the days passed like running water.I walked from the 13th apartment to the 35th floor at 8 o'clock every day, and went home at 12 o'clock; went back at 2 o'clock in the afternoon, and returned home at 6 o'clock, eight hours a day, walking more than ten miles.It's good physical exercise.I am carefree and healthy.I forgot when my original salary was restored.No need to worry about eating anymore.At this time, I have neither teaching job nor scientific research task.No one dares to write to me, no one dares to visit me.There is no outside interference at all, and I really appreciate the life of the "untouchables" (untouchables in India), which is very enjoyable.

Translating the Ramayana However, I am a person who is used to playing with brushes and ink. I am not used to this kind of life without thinking and having fun.As a porter, there is nothing to do except when there is a telephone and a letter.Sitting alone in the big glass window, staring at the people coming and going, I feel bored after a long time. "If you don't do something useless, why spend a lifetime?" I thought of these two words of the ancients.Why don't I find some "useless things" to do?There are many "useless things" in the world.Some are things I can't do in my situation, such as playing mahjong and so on.I have been used to brush and ink for a long time.After much deliberation, I still can't get out of this circle.In this environment, it is possible to write articles, but I have no choice but to have no mood to write articles.Finally I thought about translation.This thing is doable.I don't want to translate the original text to be short and easy; because it seems that the profession of concierge may become an "iron job" that cannot be shaken off in a short time.Even if it won't be once and for all, it may be once and for all.How can it be said that translation is "a useless thing"?Because I thought that there would never be a publishing house willing to publish the translations of people like me.Can it be said that it is beneficial if it is translated but cannot be published?Based on my considerations, I finally decided to translate "The Ramayana", one of the two Indian epics that is world-renowned in the literary world.This epic poem is long enough, and there are about 20,000 verses in the refined version, each verse is translated into four lines (some verses are longer), and there are at least 80,000 lines of poetry.Enough to keep me busy for a few years.

I did have some luck.Feeling that there is nothing to match, I made a request to the administrator of the library of the Department of Oriental Languages, asking him to order the finely revised Sanskrit version of "Ramayana" from India through the international bookstore.We all know that ordering foreign books can be very difficult.But I never imagined that less than two months later, eight hardcover original Sanskrit books would appear in front of my eyes.I really think these big books shine.This can be regarded as my greatest joy in the years since the "Cultural Revolution".My long-dried heart seemed to be full of green life again.My long-lost smile reappeared on my face at this time.

But my task at the time was to watch the door, to be the concierge.How dare I openly take the original book to my concierge?I was still a "molecule" at that time—I don't know what a "molecule" is—and I was still wearing a "hat"—I don't know what kind of "hat" it was—anyway, it was heavy, and I could feel it.However, "there is no unparalleled road", I finally came up with a "proper" way. The original text of "Ramayana" is in poetic style, and I insist on translating it into poetry, which is not ancient style poetry, but it is not completely vernacular poetry either.I have always believed that poetry must have rhyme, and I have to rhyme too.But it is not the old rhyme, but the rhyme of today's spoken language.To sum up, my translated poems can be called "jingles that rhyme." It means "jingles". Sometimes it is not easy to find an appropriate rhyme.So I spent my nights at home carefully reading the original text and translating Sanskrit verses into vernacular prose.The next morning, on the way to work on the 35th floor, during the interval between guarding the door, paging the phone, and sending and receiving letters after work, I changed the prose into poetry, and changed it into rhyming poems with basically the same number of words in each sentence.I tend to scribble translations of prose on slips of paper and keep them in my pocket.Sitting around with nothing to do, I took it out, deliberated, and pondered.I stare at the void, my heart hangs in the poem.Nobody—unless he's a god—will ever know what I'm doing.He said he was enjoying it, but he didn't know that he was in the gatehouse and was wearing a heavy crown.I raised my head and took a look outside the door—the crabapple flowers on both sides of the door are in full bloom, and other flowers are also in full bloom, colorful and colorful, which is a beautiful spring.

an episode Although the spring is good, my own situation has not improved much.I feel at ease as a concierge, "hide in the concierge and become unified"; but in fact it is impossible.There are still unexpected distractions. One day, I was looking outside the door when I suddenly saw a lot of big-character posters written in yellow paper pasted on a temporary tent outside the door for posting big-character posters. The teacher's signature, and some teachers are still in Liyuzhou, Jiangxi Province and have not returned.The content is to criticize the May 16th elements.Such criticism is not new at all, and I originally wanted to ignore it.But driven by curiosity, I walked out of my narrow concierge where I was "unified", and went outside to read the big-character posters.I really never thought that this big-character poster was aimed at me: I became a suspect of May 16th.This is really where to start!Anyone who has a little common sense about the so-called "Cultural Revolution" will know that the so-called May 16 Organization, which was widely rumored at that time, was formed by young people from good backgrounds.I am not a young man, and I am not from a good background. I am neither a worker, nor a poor and lower-middle peasant, or a "revolutionary cadre". How can I be qualified to join such a "revolutionary" organization?I have absolutely nothing to do with May 16th, and the lips of a donkey cannot match the mouth of a horse.Such a thing, I could have laughed it off.But this time I couldn't laugh.A few years ago, when I read "Spring Man Swallow Garden" which criticized me, I snorted unconsciously.This time I couldn't even hum.I don't know how the Revolutionary Committee and the Military Industry Propaganda Team of the Department of Eastern Languages ​​think about such a ridiculous thing.The funny things are not over yet, and even more funny things are yet to come.There was a loud clamor for May 16 all over the country, and a leader in Jinggangshan, Peking University openly admitted that he was a member of May 16;This is really like Don Quixote fighting the windmill, becoming the most ridiculous of many jokes in the "Cultural Revolution".

farce No matter how the world changes and the waves of the "Cultural Revolution" turbulent, time still moves forward slowly or quickly.In the blink of an eye, the "Cultural Revolution" seemed to have passed its climax and was about to end.Although it is said that "chaos is messing up the enemy", in fact it is mainly messing up oneself, so it is better not to be chaotic.Now it's time to bring order back to normal.The first is to restore the party organization.It is a bit too "that" for a non-party worker propaganda member to actually preside over the work of the party branch.

In order to restore the activities of the party organization, the organizational life of the party members must first be restored.I do not know when, and by what decree, all party members (except, of course, the Gang of Four, etc.) lost their organization.Now every party member has to go through certain procedures. It seems that they need to go through mass discussion and leadership approval before they can resume organizational life.It's certainly a big deal.The Department of Eastern Languages ​​probably went through a discussion with the Military Industry Propaganda Team (the non-Party Worker Propaganda member would of course participate), and decided to select one member from the entire department as a model to perform the opening scene of restoring organizational life. Pass in one fell swoop, immediately achieve success, and set an example for future generations.It is conceivable that such a person has a great responsibility.What criteria should be used to choose?First of all, you must have a good background, and second, you must have a strong party spirit.Those who have these two standards are almost the same.Probably after careful consideration and careful screening, the party member surnamed Ma who I mentioned above, a martyr and a poor and lower-middle peasant, won the bid. He was carefully selected by me as the department head and tutor to stay as my teaching assistant and Successor's.Now, I have become a "reactionary bourgeois academic authority", which happens to be the touchstone of his party spirit.There is no second person in the Oriental Language Department who meets these two conditions and has such an opportunity to "appear".Who dares to say that this is not a natural "good choice"?

I remember that one afternoon, I was called to a meeting in the cafeteria of Xueyi with all the remaining teachers and students of the Department of Oriental Languages. Each of us brought his own small wooden stool.In the empty cafeteria, the dining table was pushed aside, and the vacated space was filled with small wooden stools, on which we sat.There are several large tables in front, on which a lot of things are placed.I took a closer look and found that there were woolen clothes and trousers, radios (there were not as many radios as there are today, and they were considered precious and rare things), and some odds and ends.I followed behind the "revolutionary masses", and I still couldn't figure out what was going on, so I didn't have the time to look carefully one by one.I just feel that this is quite like a second-hand goods fair.But next to these things, there are a few handouts that are mimeographed on very rough paper. I didn't know what the handouts were at first; I didn't know why such rough props could be placed together with quite beautiful suit pants.For all these props, I don't know what role they will play in today's first meeting to restore the life of party members.I sat there full of doubts, not knowing what kind of medicine was going to be sold in the gourd. Everyone is here, time is up.The Chairman declared the meeting open.He first explained the purpose and method of the meeting, and then let the selected pacesetter speak, or speak, or "review", which meant the same thing anyway.The pacesetter stood up, walked to the front, and began to speak with dignity and righteousness.The central theme of the speech is: not to be a golden boy and a jade girl who is an academic authority of the bourgeoisie.Here is an explanation: the golden boy and jade girl are the paper dolls that were buried during the funeral in the old society.Everyone knows that the so-called "bourgeois academic authority" refers to me.At this moment, I suddenly realized: So today's play is aimed at me.I was a little surprised, but not too surprised - used to it.I just listened to my former "student" and former "successor" angrily accusing me, with a serious expression and a passionate voice, telling me that I was sugar-coated by bourgeois academic authority and poisoned by bourgeois ideology. Pursue enjoyment in life, blah, blah, blah.When he said that he almost betrayed the class of his origin, he burst into tears.He pointed to the things displayed on the table, meaning that these things were irrefutable evidence.So angry, he picked up the stack of handouts on the table—it turned out to be Sanskrit handouts—and tore them apart with both hands. The pieces of paper flew down to the ground like butterflies.I thought to myself: The next one to be torn should be the turn of the beautiful wool suit pants or the radio!It was too late to think about it, but it was so fast, he stopped abruptly and didn't stretch out his hand again. The fabric suit pants and the radio lay safely in place, still shining beautifully.I was taken aback, and I'm afraid everyone in the room was taken aback.This act of tearing things up should be the climax of today's meeting and should receive applause from the whole room.But these all came to nothing.I couldn't laugh or cry, and probably all the participants were also dumbfounded.There was a startled silence. The farce ended in failure. On the way back to the 35th floor after the meeting, everyone discussed: why not tear up the suit trousers, which may be the most revealing bourgeois pleasure thought, but tear up the Sanskrit handouts that hardly represent the bourgeois thought?I also thought a lot about it myself.This performer has been to Peking University for more than ten years.When I was a student, I was as gentle as a sheep.What I did during the "Cultural Revolution", I have already said a little bit above.That is far from enough.He's also given some really fantastic and unbelievable performances.As a rule, no sign has ever been signed on a general political slogan.It started at Peking University, and there were two people in Peking University who did this, and they all came from the Department of Oriental Languages, and one of them was the one I mentioned.This astonishing move was passed as a "beauty" talk or a joke in Peking University.In the group meeting I participated in the study among the "revolutionary masses" for the first time, I frankly commented on him. I said that he was neither like a martyr nor like a poor peasant.He probably brooded over it.Aren't these things that happened in the future not related to this? After this farce, how the party members of the Eastern Language Department gradually resumed their party organization life, because it basically has nothing to do with me, I didn’t pay attention to it, and I can’t recall it today. My Recovery Organization Life Time has passed, I don't know how long it has passed, and the work of restoring the life of the party organization at Peking University is coming to an end.There were probably only two or three people left, and I was one of them.If I write a list, I am either Sun Shan, or I am still under Sun Shan. As the saying goes, "Sun Shan has lost his name". Suddenly one day, the party organization of the Department of Oriental Languages ​​came to talk to me, and I knew it was my turn.At this time, I had already been transferred from the concierge to participate in the activities of the Hindi teaching and research section.An officer and the secretary of the general branch of the People's Liberation Army who was in charge of the department told me that the leader decided not only to pay my entire salary, but also to supplement all the previously withheld salary.Of course I was very moved.I decided to hand over all the repaid wages to the country as party dues.A very decent comrade from the Department of Oriental Languages ​​first handed me 1,500 yuan.I immediately handed it over to the general branch of the department intact.This comrade told me that he would give me four or five thousand yuan later. I can't remember now if there was a branch meeting to discuss my recovery of organizational life.Suddenly one day, the head of the military propaganda team of the department and the secretary of the general branch of the department came to me.The secretary of the general branch asked me: "Have you considered, what is your problem?" I was stunned and didn't know what to do.As far as thinking is concerned, I have quite a few problems.When it comes to political issues, I have never joined the Kuomintang or any reactionary organization, so I can only say that I have not.However, I was embarrassed for a while and didn't speak for a long time.The People's Liberation Army was quite clever, and quickly diverted his words.This unpleasant conversation is over.Not long after, a cadre transferred from the Chinese Department of the Propaganda Committee or the Organization Committee of the general branch came to me and told me that the branch had decided to resume my organizational life, but I would be punished with two years of party probation.I flew into a rage.Because I opposed the "Queen" who once ruled Peking University, I was framed, persecuted, imprisoned, and denounced.There is still justice in the world!There is still justice in the world!Isn't such an organization chilling! , This cadre saw my expression, and his face suddenly became serious: "Let's discuss it with the general branch, okay?" He said.To be honest, I have been extremely disappointed.I look forward to the stars, to the moon, and to the sun in the east.The sun came out, but it was such a sun.I don't want to struggle with this anymore, enough, enough, enough.If I signed the word "agree" on the back of the branch, it would be absolutely impossible.If I sign the word "disagree", there will still be a lot of trouble.After much deliberation, I told the cadre: "There is no need to hold any more meetings!" I took a pen and signed the words "Basically agree".I told him emphatically: "You understand what the word 'basic' means!" Then I thought again: "I wear the hat of staying in the party for two years, so what qualifications do I have to hand over the supplementary wages to the state? ?” As a result, I kept the four or five thousand yuan that I was going to hand over to myself. My story of recovering my organized life is over. Am I "completely liberated"? That's all I can write about the section on "Complete Liberation." My "Cultural Revolution" is over. Mine is even finished.