Home Categories Essays Memories of the bullpen

Chapter 18 bullpen transfer

Memories of the bullpen 季羡林 3842Words 2018-03-18
The season has entered winter, and the cell has also installed a stove and lit a fire.Although the ration of coal is not much, the fire of course cannot be very prosperous.However, compared to the outside, the house is already as warm as spring. But the labor reform team has gradually shrunk.After coming and going, there were not many people left, so they were all ordered to move into a big house.What is the reason?I don't know, and of course I dare not ask.Anyway, I have already fallen into Avici Hell at this time, and if I go up one or two levels, it doesn’t matter if it’s a ghost or a ghost.

The room seemed empty.Probably because there were fewer people, even the mice became more courageous, daring to scurry around in broad daylight.A dry steamed bun I brought back from home bore the brunt of it, some of which were bitten off by mice.I wanted to drive them away, but they dared to stare and play hide-and-seek with me on the windowsill.Maybe the mice also realize that the people living in the house are not people, but "gangsters", whose rank is no higher than that of the mice. If they bully them, forgive them and dare not do anything to them. Although everyone is afraid to talk casually and cannot exchange information, as the saying goes: "There is no impenetrable wall", I gradually learned that the Nie Ji Revolutionary Committee changed its "policy" for "reform-through-labor criminals". Re-centralize, but implement decentralization, and divide the "criminals" in each department back to their respective units.Belatedly, the Department of Eastern Languages ​​also brought some of us "criminals" back to the department.Our "bullpen" has shifted.Transfer to the Foreign Language Building.

A few days ago, when the "special class" was still in the Foreign Languages ​​Building, how I wished I could enter the Foreign Languages ​​Building!Now it really came in; but it is still the same.Several of us "criminals" were assigned to live in the Burmese language teaching and research room on the north side of the second floor, and we all had floors on the floor.There was a big table by the window, and our jailer slept on it, condescending and supervising us.His nickname is "Little Furnace Maker", probably a young student surnamed Lu.What surprised me the most was that "we" added new people that I hadn't seen in "Gangster Compound".Are they "criminals" too?I wondered.Anyway, we are now in the same pot with us, and we live in peace with each other.

Here, life is calmer.It's not like in the "Gangster Compound", where you have to tense your nerves and stretch your ears all the time, lest the jailer be late when he calls his name, which will lead to disaster.Now the jailer perched high on the table in the same hut, and there was no need to strain his nerves so much. However, life is not easy, nor can it be easy.I am still a "reform through labor criminal".There are many offices upstairs, most of which are teaching and research offices of various majors.I was the chair of the department for twenty years before I was "knocked down."I am familiar with these offices.The atmosphere around is of course very good.I am the master here.But now times have changed, and I "jumped" (jumped out myself) and became a prisoner. "Flowing water and falling flowers, spring will go, heaven and earth." I have been a "counter-revolutionary" for more than a year.I am not nostalgic for the "magnificence" of the year. I know that I have been "knocked to the ground" and will never recover.I just want to survive.

Now, in the entire building, I can only enter three places: one is the prison cell, the other is the toilet, and the third is the room where I was interrogated. The last one is not fixed.As for the second item, the "black gang" and the "white gang" ("revolutionaries") share it, because although the "black gang" is a ghost, they still have to defecate. —The real ghost probably doesn’t defecate, to be investigated. Also, there is something embarrassing about it. "Black" and "white" live together, and you can't see you when you look up.China is a country of etiquette. When you meet each other, you have to say something.But we also lack the Goodmorning that the British and Americans meet to say! How do you do?Or simply say Hello!The "good morning" and the like that are used now are authentic imported products.What we used to use in the past: "Have you eaten?" is a common greeting throughout the country. I want to shorten it to "Guohou".Now, in the Foreign Languages ​​Building, I meet people who I knew very well before, and I dare not use imported products, and "Guohou" dare not use them either.Just bow your head and look away. What do the "white gang" think?I don't know.It seems that I am a "gangster", but I really feel very awkward.Sometimes "white people" are in a certain room, discussing some issues, and the joy is turbulent, and the sound of laughter is full of "revolutionary spirit", echoing back and forth in the corridor.This revolutionary spirit didn't get on me at all.We are now "the sound of talking and laughing can be heard, but old age and death do not communicate with each other". Those who can "smell" can hear it. This is the voice of others, and we cannot have a voice.We all move like shadows, and shadows have no sound.

However, there is no shortage of news here, and there is a lack of exciting things.No one told me this news, and no one dares or is willing to do such a thing now.I heard this myself from the chattering in the corridor.The most important piece of news is about the female Mongolian language teacher I mentioned above.It turns out that she is the only female among the "criminals" in the Eastern language family.There was a women's prison in the "Gangster Compound".After arriving at the Foreign Language Building, the women's prison was gone, and they couldn't sleep on the floor with my men.So put her in another room.According to my guess, she is managed by a female student studying Korean and a female librarian of the department.The latter's surname is Ye, but his first name is temporarily missing.This person is a bachelor-like figure, pungent, rough, and best at making trouble and stirring up trouble.The library where she is located is a small salon of the Department of Eastern Languages, where rumors are generated and gossip is collected and distributed here. As soon as the "Cultural Revolution" was dispatched, she became the female leader of the Nie Ji Commune in the Department of Eastern Languages, and she probably belonged to the type of "I am determined to protect Nie's grandson to the death".Once she came to my house, scolded me loudly, and escorted me to the Foreign Languages ​​Building to accept criticism.It is probably a rare and new thing in Peking University that the prison head of a female prison escorts a male "prisoner".Such a character would never let go of the only female prisoner.One night, she and several others interrogated and beat the female prisoner.I didn't see whether this female prisoner was tortured like in the "gangster compound" until her eyes turned blue, so I dare not talk nonsense.After I heard the news, there was no fluctuation in my heart. My nerves are completely numb now.

But I never thought that the second piece of news that shocked people would come from me. After arriving at the Foreign Language Building, I was not beaten again.Probably I was just born to be an unflattering guy, a guy with a granite head and a dead end.Although I have been tempered in purgatory, I have not bowed my head and confessed my sins.One day, an officer who was probably the battalion commander who was stationed in the Eastern Language Department of the "Zhizuo" sent by the People's Liberation Army, his name was Zhao Liangshan (this person was later heard to have passed away), called me into his office and asked me a question. .I was very angry and very disappointed.I think the level of the People's Liberation Army should always be high, and now it seems that is not always the case.I said in a rough voice: "All my diaries have been copied. They will definitely be placed in a room in the Foreign Languages ​​Building. You send someone to check the diary of that day. It will only take five minutes at most." , and all the problems can be clarified.” Wan did not expect that this time he stabbed a hornet’s nest again.He turned pale and said that my attitude was extremely bad.He is now the overlord.How dare I say anything?

After dinner, return to the cell.A female teacher who had originally opposed Nie led a few people, holding big red and green slogans in her hand, and plastered the walls of the hut all over.It turned out to be a piece of white, very dull and tasteless.Now with the addition of big red and big green, I suddenly feel that the small room is full of light and full of vitality.There is no innovation in the content of the slogan, it is still "Ji Xianlin wants to shake the sky, beat him!" "It's commonplace and nothing happens", these things have no effect on my nerves.I slept through the night, waiting for the storm to come.

Sure enough, the "revolutionaries" started to act the next day.First, the "Red Guards" from the Department of Oriental Languages—now I am afraid there are both factions—escorted me to the fortieth floor where the students of the Department of Oriental Languages ​​lived.I myself was like a sent prisoner, bowing my head and ears, only seeing the ground, and staggering forward.In the old play, prisoners were allowed to raise their heads.A prisoner in my new society does not have this privilege.If it comes, let it go, let it go. I didn't know where it was leading me.When I approached Forty Arms, I suddenly realized based on my instinct.At this time, I vaguely saw big-character posters and big slogans plastered all over the outside of the building, and the content was nothing more than that.I guess—because I can’t watch it—it’s just "Down with the old Bao Ji Xianlin!"From the deafening slogans, it was only those things that were heard.I suddenly understood: I have now become a representative of "Fan Tian".

I was strangled by the neck, my arms were twisted, I was pushed and shoved, and I was escorted upstairs, first walking through the corridor on the first floor.The corridors were originally narrow, but now they are crowded with students.I heard slogans in my ears, and fists on my head and body.I couldn't see anyone, and I flew up to the second floor as if flying through the clouds.Same as on the first floor, from one end of the corridor, walk (grammatically speaking, it should be passive) to the other end.It is still the sound of slogans shaking the sky.In the noise and chaos, I walked (same as before) to the third floor.There are no new tricks here, and I feel a little dissatisfied, feeling that it is too monotonous and not tasty enough. After the "ceremony" was over, I was escorted back to the Foreign Language Building.

Later I heard that this is called "fighting in the building".Is this an invention of students from the Department of Oriental Languages?If so, one day in the future when compiling the "History of the Great Proletarian Cultural Revolution", it should be emphasized, and maybe a separate chapter will be created.As for myself, I am a man who has been through a lot.Physically and mentally, I didn't suffer any pain, I just felt a little "fun". Of course things can't end like this.It seems that Battalion Commander Zhao made up his mind and held a meeting overnight to formulate a plan for the struggle.The next day, just after breakfast, some students came to me to criticize me in a teaching and research room.This time I looked up, and what I saw was a member of the teaching and research section, plus individual students.I'm ready to sit in a jet.Instead someone pushed me a chair.I was shocked, I have now become Jia Gui of Famen Temple.Under such circumstances, what do you think can be approved and fought at this criticism meeting?I find it very bland.So I closed both ears, "let the wind and waves beat, and sit on the fishing boat." In the dimness, I heard a voice: "take Ji Xianlin out!" I knew that this drama was over. I was about to go back to my cell when someone came and dragged me to another teaching and research room, "behaving like a ritual".Then there is the third teaching and research section, and the fourth teaching and research section.I have no records and cannot count.It is estimated that every teaching and research section criticizes once.There were more than a dozen teaching and research sections in the Department of Oriental Languages, and there were a total of more than a dozen criticisms.Then came the students.I don't know how many classes there are for the students of the Department of Oriental Languages.Every class criticizes once (maybe some classes are jointly criticized), I can't remember clearly, but in total, there are always about twenty times.Based on one hour for each criticism, there are about thirty hours in total.I see that some classes "cut corners and materials", and the quality is seriously problematic.In fact, I'm afraid it won't take so much time.Anyway, within three or four days, I was busier than those who went out to "walk acupuncture points".This class has just been approved, and the next class will continue.There are eight or nine criticisms every day, leaving only time for me to eat.It can be described as tense. What did it do to me?In addition to feeling a little tired, "there are too many lice and it doesn't itch", and my "enthusiasm to be criticized" was mobilized instead.I fell in love with this kind of criticism.I feel very happy.You are "strict in righteousness and righteousness", but here I close my ears and calm down. Instead, I am "waiting for work with leisure". Things in the world are really complicated.I started with "bad attitude" and ended with "bad attitude".The first "bad" saved my life, the second "bad" raised my god.The real and fake revolutionaries at that time probably never expected it.
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