Chapter 10 Part B (Part 11)

Ke Lian, female, 26 years old, was born in a poor peasant family. Because of her father's abuse, she fled to Shenzhen to make a living independently after graduating from high school.In order to study abroad, she quit her job and came to Beijing alone. She studied in New Oriental for five years and achieved a TOEFL score of over 600.For five years, she lived on borrowed money, lived without food and clothing, and fell into homosexuality when she was desperate. Teacher Xu successfully stopped Ke Lian’s absurd act of forging financial certificates to go to the UK to study at her own expense through an intermediary company, but Teacher Xu could not help her through the difficult life.Where does Ke Lian go?How did Ke Lian get out of the predicament?

The first song: Ke Lian is neither fat nor thin I met Ke Lian on an evening in mid-July 2001.It was a hot summer, and it was an extremely tragic summer when New Oriental students' visas for studying in the United States were rejected.After finishing visa consultation for a group of sad-faced students, I crawled out of the New Oriental consultation office exhausted, panting like Wu Niu. But as soon as Colin appeared in front of me, my spirits suddenly lifted for no reason-I felt an urge to help her-I saw in her eyes, there was an expression that still makes me shudder .This kind of gaze may only be seen in New Oriental students.This is a beautiful and desperate look, it is cold and hot, sharp and dull.It is a complex state produced after the serious collision of youthful desire and life plight.It's like a pool of spring water with peach blossoms, suddenly frozen by the cold February current, the fresh and lively life, silently begging for the arrival of the spring breeze under the ice layer, longing for the news of liberation.

She said in an almost trembling voice: "Ms. Xu, I have been looking for you for several months. You must give me some time today. I have some questions about going abroad, and I must ask you to answer them!" I know, This is a child who is struggling for the future and has reached a dead end. I invited Ke Lian back to the office, and seeing her face gradually relax from white to red, I couldn't help but a beautiful music sounded in my heart: How does Ke Lian look like? --Neither fat nor thin; where did Ke Lian live at the time? --North gate of Tsinghua University.Ke Lian's figure is very plump, and her rolling curves are like a runaway horse, ready to gallop.Unintentionally sting my eyes of worshiping youth and praising life.I secretly thought with envy: She should not only be her own excellent asset, but also the greatest wealth of the family and society; she should be the most beautiful reason and achievement for the existence and development of Chinese society, and also the lucky daughter that everyone strives to love.

But it should be, here I use a series of subjunctive voices.Ke Lian's life is obviously not so enviable.Her clothes are shabby, her mood is very depressed, and it is obvious that she has fallen into an inextricable failure.Her every move seemed weird and blunt, without any charm that a girl should have.In particular, she wears a hat on her head, which is more like a huge question mark, covering her beautiful hair and seductively, freezing the dynamic rhythm of a young woman on her turning body.It makes you feel that your compliments to her will be coldly rejected in advance. I said, "Colin, you have a problem. You have a serious problem. But I don't know what the problem is. But I know your problem will be shocking if you tell it." The office has closed, and the noisy office has become very quiet .It's just me and her in the room.I poured her a cup of tea and let her relax and let herself go.I told her that I have no plans tonight, just listen to her tell her story alone, even five hours.Unbelievable surprise appeared on Ke Lian's face, and then, the first sweet smile appeared on her face.

While drinking tea, I quietly listened to Ke Lian telling her own story.I never imagined that Ke Lian's body, which contains the praise of youth, condenses so many elegy of life, the desolation of youth, the embarrassment of life and the blindness of struggle.It made me feel that New Oriental has such a serious mission and sacred responsibility for such students. Song 2: Ke Lian's Birth Is Unfortunate Ke Lian was born in an extremely poor peasant family in Jiangxi.It doesn't matter if the family is poor, family affection is the warmest.But Ke Lian's family has no warmth and love.Her parents had several children, and the family burden was very heavy.The special misfortune of Xiao Kelian's childhood was that her father had married another woman in the village and lived together openly.Dad was full of resentment towards the family that devoured most of his energy and financial resources, and vented this resentment unreservedly on the children like Ke Lian.Ke Lian was often hungry when she was a child, and the only thing she could eat was the peasant's leather whip held high by her father's black hand.After graduating from high school, Ke Lian no longer wanted to endure it, so she fled to Shenzhen alone and made a living independently.

"He likes hanging me up and beating me the most. Once he almost blinded me. He is old now and can't beat me anymore," Ke Lian said.She fell silent, looking at the gradually darkening night outside the window. I burst into tears.I'm not crying for Ke Lian's tragic past and body -- Ke Lian has grown into a slim and graceful woman in the whip -- I'm crying for Ke Lian's beautiful soul.When she was talking about how her father beat her, what was in her eyes was not deep-seated hatred and poisonous gas.On the contrary, it was an expression of infinite nostalgia and filial piety.She looked as if she wished her father would return to his old age and raise his whip to beat her again.

As for me, I really want to find a stick for Ke Lian, let Ke Lian take it home, and beat that old thing hard!Daughter of China!You, like my motherland, are always tortured and accustomed to bear the burden of humiliation. In Shenzhen, Ke Lian has done everything from secretarial to sales, earning more than 2,000 RMB a month, and is already able to support herself proudly.But Ke Lian was not satisfied with this.She wants to have a better development.What is a better development?Ke Lian set herself the goal of studying abroad.She was just twenty at the time.She said to herself: learn English, take the TOEFL test, and study abroad within five years.So I quit my job and came to Beijing.With such a beautiful dream, Ke Lian disappeared into the vast sea of ​​people in Beijing and was submerged in the whirlpool of students in New Oriental.Among the throbbing crowd in Zhongguancun, and in the crowded classroom of New Oriental, came Ke Lian's petite and fragile body.

Ke Lian, who quit her job, has no income and can only rely on the meager salary of her elder brother who is a primary school teacher in Jiangxi; Ke Lian, who came to Beijing to fight alone, has no joy and can only rely on her devout belief and fanatical pursuit of the brilliant prospect of studying abroad. .In New Oriental, I always receive countless students who come to visit me and seek advice from me with pride.However, facing a girl like Ke Lian, for some reason, I always felt that New Oriental owed her something.My Ke Lian, my New Oriental.My heart is shaking for her. Her elder brother, after graduating from a teacher training college in Jiangxi, worked as a primary school teacher in the local area, with a monthly income of just over 500 RMB.He actually has to take on the important task of supporting his sister to study and struggle in Beijing.This unbearable weight can no longer be described with a small horse-drawn cart, but a turtle-backed camel.The life before going abroad is still not settled, how will the life after going abroad be?Ke Lian obviously didn't think about it at all.Tuition fees, living expenses, air tickets.Ke Lian couldn't afford to go bankrupt for these expenses.

It is unimaginable that Ke Lian's struggle is difficult due to his weak economic ability.Ke Lian has the ambition to study abroad, but Ke Lian does not have the power to pay for it.Ke Lian, who has endowed herself with great spiritual food with the goal of studying abroad, actually still does not have the ability to solve three meals a day.Studying abroad is a huge talent investment, but not everyone can afford it.The road to studying abroad is great, but only the spirit is obviously far from solving the problem. Studying abroad also requires other resources.The application process usually takes about two years. This process is actually a struggle of comprehensive strengths such as a person's friend resources, classmate resources, social relations, and ability to obtain information.People think that studying abroad is just the two years of studying in the United States. In fact, the investment of studying abroad also includes the time, money, and energy invested for at least two years to obtain admission, as well as the lost jobs, development, and earning opportunities.

Where is Ke Lian's mistake?Ke Lian's mistake is that not only did she not have the basic resources after going abroad, but she also did not have the necessary conditions before going abroad.When she put all her energy into studying abroad, which seemed like a dream, her real life immediately turned into a nightmare.The full dedication and overpayment required for studying abroad made Ke Lian's life immediately fall into the abyss of constant giving. The core of Ke Lian's mistakes, or the key to her life design mistakes, is that she started her study abroad plan too early with zero resources, negative property, and no experience.She should have based on domestic opportunities, work hard, live well, and become an experienced person in a certain field. After she can support herself, work for about five years, accumulate a certain amount of funds, and accumulate considerable experience, she should consider studying abroad for further study.

Ke Lian, who was born with a more miserable life than others, was misled by the fanatical trend of studying abroad, and used her own wrong decision to drive herself into a more miserable bottomless pit of studying abroad.This bottomless pit has devoured all of Ke Lian's youthful joy and life wealth.Until she met me, she was still unable to stop the hopeless struggle in front of inertia.In this sense, Ke Lian is the Tang Quixote of modern women studying abroad, she is fighting against the windmill! I asked, "Did you know about the New Oriental Consulting Office before you came to Beijing?" Ke Lian smiled ashamedly and said, "Unfortunately, I didn't know, otherwise I would have avoided a little detour." "I agree. But you found out later, why not Why don't you come to see me sooner?" "Actually, I have really looked for you, but I can't always make an appointment. You are too busy!" My heart hurts like a knife.Because I know that all the mistakes in the field of studying abroad can actually be guided and helped through systematic consultation, and the despair and confusion of thousands of people can be relieved.As New Oriental, who is in charge of student counseling work, I really feel ashamed to face a student like Ke Lian. The third song: Ke Lian sighed and couldn't live Ke Lian, who came to Beijing at the age of 20, was already 26 years old when she met me at the New Oriental Consulting Office.During the six years in Beijing, Ke Lian devoted all her efforts to studying and studying abroad.Other than that, nothing is done.In the past six years, what she has achieved is that she has obtained a college self-study exam diploma, attended several training classes in New Oriental, and taken the TOEFL test three times. In the last test, she actually scored 603 points. A TOEFL score of 603 is an amazing achievement for Ke Lian.I was really shocked when I heard that.There are many factors for studying abroad, and TOEFL is the hardest one. Based on this condition, Ke Lian is enough to enter thousands of universities in the United States.Even if you are a Chinese undergraduate English graduate, if you don't go through serious review and preparation, you may not be sure to get this score.And Ke Lian reached this level only based on the cultural foundation of rural high school students. It cannot but be said that Ke Lian's last stand and counterattack achieved brilliance.After hearing Ke Lian's affirmative answer, I gasped. In this splendor, I could smell the smell of decay. I smelled decay from her high TOEFL score because there are many things to do in life. After the junior college, there is an undergraduate degree, and after the undergraduate degree, there is a master's degree; after the TOEFL, there is oral English, and after oral English, there is writing.The key is: what should be done at what time in life, in fact, there are rules.This rule cannot be reversed; if the cart is reversed, it will overturn our future.Ke Lian's problem is precisely that she regards TOEFL and studying abroad marked by TOEFL as the most urgent goal in her life, which is the most classic phenomenon of putting the cart before the horse.Her life has thus been turned upside down in the most complete way! In the six years in Beijing, Ke Lian did not earn a penny, and relied on borrowing money to survive, maintaining her struggle and sleepwalking.Her brother's income was limited and he couldn't support her for a long time, so she borrowed money from everywhere to get by.For a while, she even relied on her brother's former girlfriend, a girl who is now working as a nanny in Beijing, to help her.Ke Lian, who is able-bodied, why can't you be a nanny yourself, but swallow the blood and sweat of others in the name of struggle!Ke Lian's behavior has actually constituted a crime, but she still thinks it is sacred. Ke Lian is not only on the poverty line, she is even on the death line to pursue her dream of studying abroad!The only motivation for Ke Lian to go on is "studying abroad", a dream that looks and sounds good.Ke Lian was like this, with the yellow sky on his head, dusty feet on his feet, hearing the cold wind, and mist in his eyes. In a blink of an eye, she changed from a twenty-year-old girl with a daughter Huaichun to a twenty-six-year-old woman who had accomplished nothing (one "girl" was missing in the middle) "The word is an abbreviation method I invented for the battle). Six years are unbearable.Just when Ke Lian, who was fighting alone, was at the most difficult time, an important event happened in her life.Ke Lian lives in large and small student apartments in the rural areas of Haidian.The condition of this kind of house is extremely simple, and the cost is of course very low.In this dormitory, Ke Lian met Geng Beiwei.This girl, who was three years younger than her, formed Ke Lian's only social and living circle in Beijing, and became Ke Lian's only bosom friend and companion.Together, they gradually felt an inseparable dependence on each other. It was a cold winter night. After tossing and turning for most of the night in this air-ventilated private house, Geng Beiwei, who was sleeping on the lower bunk, finally shyly and bravely extended an invitation to Ke Lian. She said: "Sister, I Cold..." Ke Lian and Geng Beiwei, who were as cold as ice from body to heart, hugged each other tightly to keep each other warm.In Beijing, a world metropolis with a population of 10 million, they can only find refuge in each other's hearts and bodies in this way.Cold freezing nights become warm as spring.It turns out that in addition to the New Oriental campus where everyone can come, there is another secret garden that is only open to the two of them.Soon, they moved to a farmer's house at the north gate of Tsinghua University, and lived together at sunrise and sunset. Geng Beiwei came from Ningxia, and her family situation is slightly better than that of Ke Lian. Her parents dug hair vegetables in the sand every day to sell money for her to study. Although it destroyed the ecology, it ensured that Geng Beiwei's face was not green.Therefore, Ke Lian does not need to support her living expenses, and can even pay a little more.She is younger than Ke Lian, has a more introverted personality, and needs more protection and care from others.In this combination, Ke Lian actually became the elder brother, or in terms of terminology, became the husband of this temporary family, taking on the heavy responsibility of giving Geng Beiwei spiritual support and confidence in life.Ke Lian has been running around all day for studying abroad, no matter how late she comes home, Geng Beiwei will definitely be waiting for her at home.Two weak girls who have been forgotten and abandoned by fate and society just love each other, waiting for "going abroad", the sun that will never rise and should not rise, to illuminate their hut. Ke Lian got a high score of 603 in the third TOEFL test in May 2001.So Ke Lian started contacting to go abroad.Under the introduction of an overseas study agency, she was admitted to a British university, and the tuition and miscellaneous fees added up to 200,000 for one year and 800,000 for four years.To study abroad requires financial proof. Ke Lian, who can't even afford a few hundred yuan, can't produce the financial proof of hundreds of thousands of yuan needed for studying abroad.Family support is non-existent.His father had nothing but a collection of whips for lashing little Corinne.Therefore, the intermediary of this dog day said that as long as Ke Lian paid more, he would issue a fake certificate for her.Anyway, as long as Ke Lian gets a visa and goes to the UK, the intermediary can get tens of thousands of RMB.As for whether Ke Lian went to England to live or die, it was a matter of emotion and reason, and the agency didn't have to worry about it, Ke Lian couldn't imagine. Can fake certificates get away with it?This is the direct reason why Ke Lian came to me. "This is my last chance, Mr. Xu, you must help me! If I don't go out, I really can't survive!" The fourth song: Ke Lian's tragic song Ke Lian could have lived a very good life.But in this vibrant summer of Beijing, why did she cry out that she couldn't survive?If a twenty-five-year-old girl with a college education can't survive in the capital of her own country, who can survive in the land of China?What's wrong with Ke Lian's life? Ke Lian's mistake was that she didn't have the basic conditions to study abroad, but she blindly set the goal of studying abroad for herself.Throughout Ke Lian's struggle, her struggle was completely spontaneous, blind, groundless and unreasonable.Do struggles require conditions?Struggle requires conditions!Her struggle reminded me of those "warriors" who drifted on the Yangtze River in the early 1980s. Because drifting on the Yangtze River could attract the attention of the society, many people who did not have the minimum rafting facilities and basic rafting training jumped into their mothers one after another. The river, in the end, was buried in the stormy waves.Ke Lian's investment is almost similar to this.Studying abroad is a good thing.But studying abroad also requires basic internal and external conditions. Just thinking that studying abroad is a good thing, jumping into it crazily is actually a bit suicidal, at least suicide.After six years of struggle, she still has to use the study abroad agency to make fake materials for her, so that she can get away with it.This has already proved that Ke Lian's initial decision to study abroad was absolutely blind and crazy. Ke Lian's decision is wrong, and I think few people can reasonably object to this judgment.But the problem behind this mistake may not be seen by too many people.Ke Lian's mistakes have profound social factors.It is this social factor that leads to Ke Lian's madness and determines Ke Lian's sorrow.This social factor is the theory of only diplomas, only knowledge, and only educational background that hangs over Chinese society, rather than the theory of ability, contribution, and success (heroes).Ke Lian, who graduated from high school, mistakenly believed that her only way out was to study abroad in such a wrong atmosphere in society, so she cut off many better lives and struggles.In the eyes of this erroneous society, this mistake is almost an act of martyrdom, a human bomb for a worthy fighter.Ke Lian and the others had almost no other choice in the face of such common social values.Ke Lian's courage is admirable, although her choice is an act of bravery.It is not she herself who is responsible for her future, but the society. Ke Lian's decision was wrong, because after she made the mistake of deciding to study abroad, she made an even more mistake of giving up the opportunity and attempt of domestic struggle.Dedicate everything to studying abroad.Put all your hopes on going abroad.Since studying abroad is heaven, life on earth can be abandoned.Since studying abroad can bring an essential leap in life, all struggles in the country seem unnecessary and meaningless.Giving up the choice became the best choice.Studying abroad is feasible, but studying abroad requires sacrifice.If you want to study abroad, you have to sacrifice, and failures often happen... Gradually, studying abroad has become a ritual for Ke Lian that must be worshipped, a worship that brings pleasure, a kind of constant expectation and hope, a An ever-increasing and distant heaven. When struggle becomes an act regardless of cost and reward, struggle itself becomes blind; when struggle becomes a spiritual pursuit that does not consider the cost, the way out and the feasibility, struggle becomes obsession and fanaticism.If a kind of struggle is only for the realization of "ideal" and loses the rational analysis of real interests, this struggle becomes a kind of religion.Religion promises you heaven, but the purpose of this promise is to make you love the earth.If the promise of heaven is just to make you turn your back on the earth and turn your back on real life, then this religion becomes a cult.A cult is not determined by the number of believers.Whether it is a cult depends on whether it is beneficial or harmful to the happiness of real life.In this sense, studying abroad regardless of the consequences, striving regardless of the cost, and pursuing values ​​without value is a kind of cult. Going abroad should not be at the expense of domestic development; going abroad should not sacrifice domestic life.If so, going abroad will become the lowest behavior in the history of human emigration: fleeing for refuge.In the golden age when the sun is rising in the 21st century, when all multinational corporations in the world are looking to this hot land, Ke Lian is not qualified to study abroad but chooses to study abroad. Ke Lian has a great chance to succeed in China but refuses to succeed. It's because of the viciousness of the cult of studying abroad.This cult of studying abroad is intertwined with various education systems and ideas in Chinese society, making it difficult for countless young people to obtain real happiness and enjoy the joy of youthful life. Why does Chinese society always turn the signs of happiness and success of young people, such as college entrance examinations, studying abroad, and diplomas, into alien forces that devour young people's youth and happiness?Turned into a long and hopeless mental and willpower-draining slog?In China, too many students and parents have fallen into this cult.Too many students are burying their youth and lives for this behavior that has no end and no effect.Perhaps, the whole society needs to reconsider her educational idea of ​​taking knowledge as the goal and diploma as the standard.Perhaps, Ke Lian's spiritual system, as a sign of the times, is outdated.Building on the ruins of Ke Lian's life struggle, the new study abroad thought and struggle value are the only choice to guide contemporary youth from success to success. Although Ke Lian's life has been severely ruined by her, as long as she abandons her haphazardly set goals for studying abroad and establishes another new value of studying abroad and a new value of life, she still has new hope and future.Starting from scratch, Ke Lian will regain her lost youth and self-confidence. This is a spiritual hurdle that the Chinese generation of youth must first overcome if they want to move towards the future and success.This is the re-liberation and combination of values, and this is the re-cleaning and confirmation of youth consciousness.There are talented people from generation to generation.But the emergence of talents in large numbers is based on the constant emergence of new ideas.The beautiful Chinese rivers and mountains should constantly breed and give birth to new ideas about youth struggle. Song 5: Ke Lian's life is in crisis The wind is blowing, the water is cold, and Ke Lian is gone forever.Ke Lian, who has fallen into the fetishism of studying abroad, is just like those who do not have the qualifications for rafting to jump into the Tiger Leaping Gorge of the Yangtze River.Next, I will follow Ke Lian's drifting river bed and analyze several dangerous areas where she may overturn: 1. Deception is difficult to succeed.The first crisis that Ke Lian may have is: six years of hard work, and today he still has to use fake materials to break through. What if he can't get out?Ke Lian's situation is difficult to pass the visa.Once the visa is refused, can Ke Lian bear it?If you use false certificates, if you are exposed, you will never be able to go to this country.Can Ke Lian, who has given everything in her life for this for six years, be able to bear this blow? (Xu Xiaoping’s note: Ke Lian met me for the first time in July 2001 just to ask this question. Although I objected, she still submitted it, but the visa was rejected. She came to New Oriental to meet me again in February 2002 When she told me the sad news. I wasn't surprised at all, I was surprised that she took the blow and still managed to get out! This justifies my concerns. See Corinne The end of Jiuge) 2. The cost cannot be afforded.The second crisis that Ke Lian may have is: if she gets out by chance, how will she pay for the expensive study abroad fee?How to feed myself who will survive in the cold window in the next two or three years?Hundreds of thousands of RMB is an astonishingly large amount of money. Needless to say, Ke Lian has no place to borrow it.Work to support yourself?It is impossible and absurd to completely expect to support oneself and pay tuition by working part-time.This is absurd and even scarier than practicing Falun Gong.Can her physical strength and energy sustain it?There are many ways for a person to destroy and torture himself. Is this the best way?To torture one's youth to this extent for an unattainable belief definitely constitutes the basic evil of a cult.Ke Lian must get out of this lost path! 3. The return is not worth the effort.The third crisis that Ke Lian may have is: I am worried that even if Ke Lian lives to get the degree, will she get enough rewards from the perspective of direct monetary calculation?Is her investment worth it?If at that time she finds that she has struggled to this day, she is not as good as those who do not go abroad (this is entirely possible), and Ziye wakes up from a dream, I really don't know if she will have a nervous breakdown.In New Oriental, I saw many people who returned from studying abroad could not find a suitable position overseas, and did not find satisfactory opportunities when they returned to China.Ke Lian, who is twenty-five years old and still doesn't know what she can do, if she doesn't achieve the success she imagined when she returns to China after studying abroad for two or three years, then Ke Lian's pain at that time must be something she can't escape after waking up from the dream. 4. Lose happiness in life.The fourth possible crisis is: even if Ke Lian can find a job that meets expectations after she completes her studies, will she gain enough sense of success and happiness in her life?Ms. Ke Lian, who has a master's degree in the UK, is almost 30 after graduation and has not done anything in her life.In addition to investing ordinary money in the struggle to study abroad, you also need to invest time and youth.And in Kelian, she literally put her life and blood into it.Ke Lian has paid and will pay a high price for studying abroad. Even if he can get a high salary in return, can he get a return in the sense of life value?Working, studying, and struggling fiercely, it is difficult for Ke Lian to meet the right person on the road of life. If he can't meet the right person, what will happen to Ke Lian's sex life?What about Ke Lian's love?What about Ke Lian's marriage? (Too many problems give me a headache just thinking about it. But Colin doesn’t have to. Because, this is the future pain waiting for her. She thinks she can avoid it. I know it’s her destiny. My heart, I can’t help it Shed blood for Ke Lian.) 5. It is better to fight domestically.The fifth possible crisis is: when Ke Lian came back from studying abroad and suddenly saw her former colleague in Shenzhen becoming a high-level white-collar worker, a private business owner, and a rich man, Ke Lian might yell and faint on the spot.Ke Lian paid too much for herself!And her friends, for so many years, seem to have been living a lively life, singing and dancing.Domestic struggle is not easy, but at least they did not put themselves in the desert of spiritual life and material life, starving themselves for ten years like wild wolves just to bring back such a thin dog as "foreign scholar"!If Ke Lian did not study abroad, if Ke Lian had been in Shenzhen, Beijing, or a certain Hope or Lenovo company in China until today, wouldn’t Ke Lian be able to achieve the same success and success that studying abroad might bring? profit?The answer is yes.In the face of such answers and cases, how could Ke Lian not collapse—if she still has a little common sense! 6. You can't seek glory by selling your body.There are many crises, and the sixth crisis that Ke Lian may have is: Maybe Ke Lian can marry a foreigner or overseas Chinese after going abroad, and live a good life without worrying about food and clothing.In fact, this is the most likely nightmare to happen.There are a lot of unemployed men and losers in Western society, red, white, blue and yellow, and they specialize in preying on outstanding women in developing countries.Today's daughters in China, especially Ke Lian, who have received higher education and mastered English, will definitely be one of the worst choices if they take this path.Beijing and Shanghai already have the standard of living and quality of a moderately developed country.When you go to a developed country, marrying a low-level developed man is simply a traitor of the new era.Teacher Xu is not opposed to interracial marriage, but Teacher Xu is opposed to the imbalance of resources, and even more against the traitorism of marrying for studying abroad.Therefore, even if Ke Lian wants to enter this dream by studying abroad, I will be more worried about her future. I am sad.Education is not only a dream, but also a commodity.If you don't have the purchasing power and insist on buying, you can only buy at a high price.Ke Lian used false certificates to go abroad, but in fact she had already started stealing.That is to say: when Ke Lian is close to success, it is actually the beginning of her stealing.The absurdity of the decision determines the unfortunate outcome. Ke Lian, why didn't you come to me at that time!If you could find me in 1996 like Sha Mei did, your future will definitely be brilliant! But I'm really ashamed of myself.Because I did not send my consultation to Ke Lian in time.This led to Ke Lian's life that was close to destruction. I really want to scold Ke Lian severely.Because she was in Beijing and did not come to the New Oriental Consulting Office, she hastily made the wrong decision to study abroad, thus desecrating her youthful dreams and ruining the sacred term "struggle". This is my responsibility, and this is the responsibility of New Oriental. Since it has become the spiritual fortress and center of yearning for contemporary international students, and is responsible for their future, New Oriental is duty-bound. Corinne, please forgive me!Because, we have been working hard; so, let us do better! Song Six: Ke Lian's Hat Hides Secrets I got into a crisis of my own for Colleen's.I was thinking of what advice to give her to save her from the crisis.But I don't know where to start.I saw her hat and thought of it. I said, "Ke Lian, take off the hat! Wearing this hat on such a hot day is too ugly and uncomfortable. You don't feel bad, but I do." Hearing that I wanted her to take off the hat, Ke Lian held the top of her head tightly, It seemed to have exposed her most embarrassing scars.In order to change the subject, she pretended to be relaxed and said: "Teacher, I just want you to tell me whether it is okay to go abroad by making a fake certificate. Don't worry about other things, it's okay." She shrugged, but I actually knew , she actually couldn't bear the load on her shoulders. Ke Lian continued: "Teacher, I'm not born gay. I don't like that, you know, I don't like being with her... But Geng Beiwei needs it. Besides, she can't leave me very much. She put I was her only relative in Beijing, so I had to live with her and continue to live with her. "I don't want to go on like this with her. I want to leave her. But she can't leave me. I'm afraid that if I disappear suddenly, her spirit will collapse. Teacher, what do you think I should do? Teacher, do you understand? I don't Not a natural gay." Ke Lian emphasized this point to me again, eyes full of anticipation. I quickly said: "It doesn't matter if you are born gay, teacher, I support you!" Ke Lian was surprised by my words, and her eyes lit up.There was a faint smile on her face, and the quick-frozen life seemed to stretch and melt in the sun.She picked up the tea cup, tasted the oolong in the cup, and kept looking at me, carefully understanding the meaning of my words.I think my support for her unleashed a monster in her that was devouring her. She suddenly leaned towards me like a close sister, and asked me quietly: "Teacher, what about you? Have you ever been gay?" Ke Lian looked at me expectantly, obviously wanting to find some gay comfort from me.Looking at her eyes that instantly became extremely gentle and pious, I didn't want to let her down. I said noncommittally: "I won't tell you now!" After saying this, I suddenly realized that Ke Lian was looking for psychological support and moral comfort.The hat she wore on a hot day was intended to hide her inner turmoil, to draw attention to it, to express her inner cry for help and advice.This clothing symbol of hers is a contradiction: it is both a cover and an expression.This contradiction represents her inner struggle.She has too many things that people need to help people understand.But she couldn't get the help she needed.In front of the mountain of despair, she did not have the ax to cut out the stone of hope; in the vast desert, she did not have the light boat to cross to the oasis of life.Ke Lian was exhausted, and the hat became the tombstone of her mental exhaustion. Ke Lian's hat is used to hide her identity as a woman.Having sex with that girl made her feel responsible and aware of her commitment to this child, so she put on a hat to downplay her femininity and emphasize her husband image.This is why when I saw her, although she had the natural beauty of a woman, she concealed and rejected this beauty everywhere, which made people feel weird. But on the other hand, her biological instincts are not homosexual, and even though she may have a slight inclination to homosexuality, as many people do, this inclination will never become a way of life as long as life experiences do not create the conditions for that.Those born as lychees will not become red beans.Ke Lian was anxious, confused, and lost because of the sexual orientation in front of her. She wanted to find the answer, and she wanted to find a way out.But she was nowhere to be found for answers.So, she put on this hat as a signal and a banner, so that those who understand her can give her the right guidance. Walking on the street, Ke Lian's hat represents Ke Lian's questioning to this cruel world, expressing her inner conflict and confusion: Am I so wrong?What's wrong?如果是错的，为什么我心里感觉到如此的温情和感恩？如果是对的，为什么走到阳光下的大街上，我的心中却充满前所未有的羞耻和愧疚？帽子下面没有魔术般的答案，但帽子下面却隐藏着杂技一样复杂的困惑。 是柯莲不幸的生活经历把她引向了同性恋的生活，把她带给了一个她并不想要的女性伴侣。在那个寒冷的冬夜，那个寒冷的宿舍，两个从外地来北京的一无所有实际上已经被社会抛弃的女子，能够得到的，除了相互间同样艰难的命运之外，还有什么能使她们感到温暖和尊严的存在呢？互相给予的安慰，互相索取的温暖，成为这个世界上给予她们自尊和信心的最直接和最现实的物质基矗柯莲喜欢什么生活？她实际上喜欢男人！柯莲喜欢什么形象？她追求做一个女人。她的潜意识里面，一定是想解放她的美丽曲线，引爆她的女性魅力。爱过之后是悔恨，狂喜下来是痛苦。她想把她的帽子扔到心灵的垃圾堆里去。但是，她无法自己解放自己。她自欺欺人地陷入了一种并不情愿过的生活，她想摆脱这种生活，但这种生活自身的重力、自身的责任缠住了她，Trap(陷阱)了她。 耿蓓薇进入柯莲的生活，对于柯莲意义重大。柯莲为了所谓的人生奋斗，本来已经放弃了所有的现实人生，包括对于金钱、爱情和性的追求，对于最基本的生存前提--就业的追求。而追求以"出国"为终极目标的"来生"。所谓的奋斗理想，在诱导她们，放弃现世的幸福。和邪教惟一不同的是，邪教的"来生"始于生命之终结，所以活着的目的都是为了生命终结之后的极乐世界。而留学邪教的"来生"则始于离开中国！一切奋斗的目的，始于离开中国之后的留学人生的开始。 这个邪教拒绝今日的生活，拒绝今日之肉体之满足。奋斗只看重灵魂，追求不需要肉体。但是肉体需要肉体。肉体也需要灵魂。而灵魂，则需要感情。没有感情的灵魂，是孤魂，是游魂。 柯莲孤独而游荡的灵魂，降落在耿蓓薇的身上，完成了从弃绝七情六欲的"奋斗者"到"性感女人"的人化过程。和耿蓓薇的关系，尽管违反了柯莲的性取向，但对柯莲的作用，是使她惊讶地发现了灵与肉栖息的家园，第一次在这里体会了青春存在的价值。 然而，灵与肉的栖息，无法抚平柯莲的道德人格冲突。因为她的这种归宿感，只能在夜深人静的时候发生，只能在太阳下山之后感受。她依然感到自责与负疚。 没有人注意柯莲的帽子发出的信息。就像铁达尼克号在茫茫大海里发出的求救信号无人回应一样，没有人愿意、没有人能够，向她冰海沉船的灵魂扔出一个救生圈。 丑与美，欢与罪，在黑夜里飞出了潘多拉的盒子，在她们的小屋里飞翔、翩舞、歌唱、尖叫、呻吟……柯莲想逃离，想反抗。但是，柯莲已经没有一丝力量……于是，柯莲带上这顶帽子，走向了世界。好像帽子能够使她成为男人。好像帽子能够给她丈夫身份。好像帽子能够像五行山一样，镇压并抵抗那个摧毁她微弱心理平衡的代表社会道德秩序的孙悟空。 我已经知道柯莲的所有问题了。我知道，帮助她的时刻已经来到。我说："柯莲你信任我吗？"柯莲说："我信任！""你听我的话吗？"柯莲说："我听"。 "既然这样，那么听我的话，把帽子摘掉吧！"柯莲举起手要去摘她的帽子。但又停留在耳鬓足足五分钟，她的眼睛一直盯着我看。我微笑着，注视着她，给她坚定的鼓励。最后，她终于掀起了她头顶的大山。 Hallelujah!柯莲的头发像梦一样在我眼前风起云涌，"逆风飞"。 飞流直下三千尺，疑是银河落九天。"多美丽啊，柯莲！"我说。 这个坚强的姑娘，抚摸着自己的头发，在我的面前，失声痛哭了起来。 第七歌：柯莲人生本幸福 我对于柯莲的人生设计，好像得到了她的认可。我见她是在2001年的夏天，我反思她的命运是在2002年早春。我不知道柯莲现在怎么样了。但我相信我给她的设计，虽然非常简单，但能够瞬间改变她的处境。 我给她的配方很简单：get a job,找份工作，忘记出国！先让自己在中国大地上建立起自己的根基，再说出国的事情。在积累一定的资金和工作经验之前，留学对柯莲不合适。 柯莲没想到我会如此直截了当地反对她的出国计划。但我的反对，还是在她心中激起了最终引发她精神雪崩的冲击波。 柯莲告诉我：两个星期前，北京一个人才招聘会，她抱着凑热闹的心理去看看，见到一个计划来北京开设办事处的外国老板，老板和柯莲聊了十几分钟，被她的英语能力所吸引，实际上已经提供给她一个工作！她说起薪能够达到3000人民币。虽然这还不是一个确定的合同，但至少证明了柯莲已经拥有的价值。而这个价值之大，实在是柯莲没有看到的。 我鼓励她接受这个工作，好好干，好好挣钱，先把自己养活了再说！努力在岗位上干好，争取在最短的时间内，使收入到达5000人民币以上的水平。一个人能够挣到5000人民币以上，经济决定意识的真理就会显灵，柯莲对于出国不出国会有崭新的视角！ 事实上，等到柯莲挣到5000人民币以上的时候，柯莲的人生就会发生根本变化。首先，出国对于她，就变成一件唾手可及的事情。各个国家对中国越来越开放，柯莲一个月的工资，能让她出国玩十天，出国于她，已经不是需要奋斗六年的梦，而只是下个月提前请假的安排。 据说，当国民人均年收入达到5000美金的时候，中国就进入了中等发达国家水平。look!柯莲只要好好干下去，就已经捧着"中等发达国家"的金盆啦！金盆在手边，为什么这么多人却要把它当作破罐破摔呢！ 柯莲已经二十五岁，从小缺少家庭的温馨，成年后又没有得到她真正需要的爱，身心成熟的柯莲，渴望一份真感情，需要一个好伴侣，享受青春的美丽，体验生命的激情。立即放弃留学计划，立即寻找一份工作，立即用实际行动养活自己，摆脱那种靠借债度日的生活，这才是柯莲应该走的奋斗道路。这样的道路走到一定的时刻，留学就会像山阴道上的鲜花，蓦然对她开放，向她招手。柯莲艰难复杂的人生问题，解决起来竟是如此的简单！我禁不住狂欢地叫了起来。吓得新东方办公楼的警卫，以为我出了什么事，赶紧冲过来保卫我。 我看见三年后的柯莲。她穿着宝姿牌套装，风度翩翩地向我走来。她的月薪是5000也许是8000。她的存折有四万或是六万。她已经去过新加坡还是韩国旅游了一次或是两次。她的老板对她很有"意思"，但她非常熟练地把他拒绝让他死心而又不令这混蛋恼羞成怒，使得老板更加重用她。她的事业正在上升。好几个外企给她更高的工资并且许诺送她出国培训只要她愿意立即跳槽。她这三年把一切都放在工作上，但还是在新东方读了一期"高级口译班"，使得她的口语能力大大加强，也就使得她的人才价值大大提升，这也是她的老板虽然一直无法把她征服但依然对她爱恨交加的根本原因。 柯莲长得怎么样？端庄成熟而妩媚；柯莲现在住那里？北京SOHO现代城！柯莲脸一红，马上告诉我她现在同居的伙伴毕业于清华而且是个男生，"虽然有点傻但是人品和技术却都是一流也就凑合着过吧"，正在联系出国很有可能得到MIT的奖学金，但是"我自己并不想F2走倒不是我更喜欢F4偶像组合--我不急是因为各种机会实在真的是很多很多！"柯莲的眼睛顾盼迷离，霞光流溢。我想她的性生活一定非常丰富多姿，但是这样的问题我已经不能追问。我脱口说了一个sorry柯莲迷惑地问我一个why？黑黢黢的眼睛红艳艳的唇，颤巍巍的胸脯圆滚滚的臀。我的朝拜青春和礼赞生命的眼睛再次就被她美丽的身躯所刺痛，就像三年前也就是今天这样。 "记得耿蓓薇吗？她后来考了一个会计执照我帮她介绍了一份工作后来找了一个做电脑的现在都快结婚了！"柯莲的长发，有几缕染成了红色。黑红黑红的色彩，光亮光亮的青丝，极其悦目而柔和。 "我现在反复在想到底是否还要出国？我想先考一下GMAT再说，反正这个成绩五年有效呢也不急着作决定。如果不出国，我想就在工作上再努力努力，干到三十岁以后，再在国内读个北大清华或是中欧管理学院的在职EMBA，可能也一样可以完成你所说的现代化洗礼，也许。"柯莲性感地耸耸肩。 你说这样可行吗，老师？ 我以为柯莲接着要问我很多问题，但她却戛然而止。她忽然看着我诡秘地笑。我知道这个家伙已经不再那么崇拜我了，因为她自己已经飞升到了生活的第一个高台。我知道她的笑容里面的潜台词是，"瞧我都这样了你还在新东方做个挂名的校长而且还是个副的"，虽然我并不为此感到自卑相反感到自豪。没有我哪来你的今天呢我心里暗想！但是面对这样一个白领丽人我自己已经感到长江后浪推前浪，即使我们的事业更加伟大但生命毕竟在无情流淌啊！柯莲还在诡秘地笑，简直有点狡黠的样子。我都快生气啦！ 柯莲从背后拿出一个小小的精美的购物袋。我心里一热说，算了吧你还要给我买礼物(我要的礼物我既不能索取你也不会给予)，没想到柯莲的脸蹭地一下变得潮红。她说："徐老师，这个礼物送给你，作为学生永恒的感激和纪念。"打开手袋，捧在我手中的，是一顶帽子。残破、陈旧，但洗得干干净净。 这是2001年7月那个夏天，柯莲来新东方找我时，那顶像大山一样压在她的头上，但在我的逼迫下摘下来的帽子。 我轻轻地拥抱了她。不用说，不用问，一切都在拥抱中。我要把她的帽子，作为最新出版的《新东方精神》一书的封面，来提醒和昭示更多的新东方学员。 第八歌：柯莲绝境找绝望 幻想是美丽的，现实常常无情。2002年2月，春节后不久，一个女孩子把电话打到了我很少有人知道的手机上。 "徐老师，你好。你还记得我吧？" 电话里传来略带四川口音的声音，听上去非常温柔，非常动人，非常熟悉。 我说："记得，当然记得--告诉我你的名字，我就知道你是谁？"我确实记得这个熟悉的声音，但我已经无法想起这个名字。 "老师，我是柯莲。" "柯莲！"我大喜，柯莲一直在我心里牵挂着，不知她别来是否无恙？写作这本书，我正需要知道她的现状，以检验我给她的咨询到底给她带来的是前途还是陷阱。我说："柯莲，我一直在找你呢！你去哪里啦，也不给我来个电话。赶快过来，我要和你聊聊！"半个小时之后，柯莲来到我的身边。她比过去更加丰满而不肥胖，她比过去更加女儿味而洗尽了男性化的踪影。她的帽子已经不见了，她的头发像云朵，遮在她皎洁的面庞上。我承认，我非常喜欢她！我自豪，这是我咨询的成果。 但是柯莲满面愁容。比上次更加阴郁。原来，她留学之梦果然没有得到实现。英国使馆把她的签证申请毫不留情地拒绝了。柯莲"勤工俭学"的计划遭到了重挫。为她联系留学的中介扣着她交付的一万多人民币不退还给她，说要再帮她申请另外一个国家的另外一个学校，而且如果签证依然下不来的话，扣除她一半的手续费。8000元！丧心病狂埃"徐老师，我来咨询你，去加拿大的话需要什么手续？"我一听，精神几乎崩溃了。半晌没有说话，我再次感到了去年夏天的窒息。我几乎用哭腔对她说："柯莲，你已经浪费了太多太多的生命，不要再在留学的邪道上走下去了。这是一条对你来说行不通的道路！"柯莲倔强而愠怒地反问我："那么多人都在走。你凭什么说就我走错了！"我说："问题就在这里，留学通道上，盲目挣扎的人确实太多了。可惜的是，他们得不到我的咨询。而你，既然见过我，就必须按照我的思想做！"柯莲用几乎流泪的声音说："你要我做什么！徐老师？""在国内找一份工作，踏踏实实地工作、挣钱、过日子。积累经验和金钱之后，再考虑出国的事情。"柯莲用几乎泣血的声音说："我已经在这个事情上浪费了七年时间，牺牲太多太多了。徐老师，我已经二十七岁了……我不能半途而费、无功而返。""这不是半途而废，这是悬崖勒马！否则，你会继续浪费七年时间，你会成为一个彻底的牺牲品！"我真的要哭了！ 我被柯莲的固执所激怒，而柯莲也被我的坚定所震撼。She fell silent.但是我听见她的心里在哭泣，我看见她的心底在流血。这个可怜的孩子，除了出国这么一个疯狂的梦想，还有什么呢？她不靠这个欺骗自己，还靠什么麻醉自己呢？ 第九歌：柯莲人生终辉煌 我知道这个对话无法进行下去，我想改变一个话题，于是我问："柯莲，你靠什么过日子呢？""哥哥，哥哥的女友，朋友借，自己也想方设法挣一点。"柯莲的脸色稍微好转一些。 这时，她的手机响了起来。已经是在我们讲话过程中的第三次了。 我说："你还挺忙的嘛！" 柯莲这时候眼睛亮了一下，说："我在做一点小生意！"我来了兴趣，连忙问柯莲是什么生意。这个问题，立即打开了柯莲的话匣子，她兴致勃勃地告诉我：她从自己在新东方的生活经历，看到了一个巨大的市场需求，这个需求是：同学们来到新东方总要买很多很多图书磁带，这些图书磁带在考试完毕和学习结束后，往往没有人愿意把他们带走，很多依然有用的资料就扔掉或送人了。柯莲感到奇怪，这么大一个需求，为什么居然没有人来提供相关服务？再一想我自己何不把这个事情做起来呢，也可以为自己的生活带来一点小小的补贴。于是她就真的做了起来：她把自己的生活费拿出来做资本，低价收购学员那些不再需要的书籍磁带，然后以远远低于新书的价格，把这些并不过时的磁带书籍卖给新来的学员。柯莲凭她对新东方学员圈子的熟悉了解，居然以几百元的资金，现在已经滚动到了好几千人民币的资产。 "黑夜给了我黑色的眼睛，我却用它来寻找光明"。这是好诗。但是，光明是什么？柯莲的光明，就是生存的技能、就是谋生的本领、就是个人学习深造的资金。黑夜给了柯莲黑色的眼睛，她应该用它来寻找黄金！我为她讲的这个生意故事着迷。 "我现在刚刚开始做，平均每个月有一千多块的收入。如果资金允许的话，最好有一个小小的铺面，一个月挣四五千块钱是没有问题的。"柯莲几乎以诱惑的眼光看着我，想探索我是否有投资的意向。 这个时候，我看见了柯莲前途通道上的光亮，我看见她获救的希望！我看见，一个企业家正在诞生。 我说："如果我给你投资，你想干下去吗？"柯莲以几乎是欢叫的声音，回应着我的试探："好啊！徐老师如果你真的投资，我们肯定可以赚钱的！""如果你赚了钱，你还打算不顾一切地出国留学吗？"明明知道我的话是个圈套，柯莲稍微思考了一下，斩钉截铁地说："不！如果生意做起来，我就不出去了，至少三年之内不走！"我的脸上，绽开了好久未见的阳光明媚的笑容。刚才没有打通的人生通道，现在终于吹来了浩荡的春风。 我说："柯莲，如果你早把自己的智慧和精力放在寻找就业与创业机会上，说不定今天的你，已经是一个五十万富婆了。世界于你简直是如履平地，根本不要这样疯狂地走到牛角尖上去啦！千万不要忘记，Its never too late to make money，its never too old to start a business!再晚你也得赚钱，再老你也得谋生。只要你真的好好干，你一定能够在生活中找到你的位置，获得你的幸福。恭喜啊！"柯莲莫名其妙地看着我："恭喜什么呢？你给我投资吗？"柯莲可能永远都不会知道我恭喜她什么。但是我知道，她在生意上这个意外发现，和哥伦布发现新大陆意义是一样的。这是21世纪中国青年们最伟大的发现之一。她的生命力在这个生意上找到的突破口，是中国青年奋斗最伟大的突破口之一。 当柯莲不再把出国留学当作自己惟一的出路，中国留学运动，就进入了一个理性发展阶段；当柯莲能够愉快而理性地思考留学之外人生的其他选择，中国留学青年，就赢得了包括留学前途在内的真正正确的人生出路和前途。 一叶落而知秋，一莲开而知春。我庆幸，当历史进入21世纪第二个年头的时候，柯莲再次来到我的身边，向我报告了奋斗者的春天终于到来的信息。这是柯莲的春天，这是奋斗的春天，这是青春和生命的春天。 从此我将再也不和柯莲谈留学。如果谈，只谈赚了更多钱之后，如何利用国内国外的教育资源，最终完成自己的提升。 理论是灰色的，生命之树常青。柯莲最终还是自己用自己青翠的生命之树，否定了她自己奋斗理论的苍白。 我觉得，我已经深深爱上了这个执着而最终找到了人间正道的姑娘。 ◎Comment by Yu Minhong 柯莲是留学领域里行而上学的牺牲品。徐小平说是留学邪教，挺有力量。她为自己设置一个留学的目标，仅仅是因为留学是一个"好事情"。她没想到留学是需要各种各样的条件的。没有基本条件和资格，蛮横启动的奋斗，就好像没有翅膀的飞机愣要起飞一样，结果只能是费煞苦心之后无情坠毁。 这使我想到，每个学生在决定留学之前，都应该对自己的状态进行一番科学客观的评估，看看自己是否应该留学、是否够格留学、是否值得留学、留学是否是实现真正人生价值的惟一或最佳通道。这其实就是人生设计概念。 柯莲的问题，其实可以用《人生可控核聚变》中的理论来分析：她应该控制好自己留学奋斗的时间，这样她的人生才可能引爆。别的不说，钱对于柯莲就是一个致命的因素。柯莲的悲哀，确实是因为她被出国无意识蒙蔽了眼睛，看不见其他任何有意义有价值的选择。这显然是愚蠢的。 我希望新东方能够把这种思想传播给每一个学生，使得柯莲这样的悲哀、无奈和失败不再发生。