Chapter 5 Part A (Part 1) (Part 3-Part 4)
Looking back on the past, she will not regret the vanity of dedicating herself to studying abroad, nor will she suffer from the concept of marrying abroad, nor will she regret falling into the collective unconsciousness of studying abroad.She will proudly say: "I have made the most correct choice for my life. Moreover, the reason for my choice is based on a great belief-controllable nuclear fusion in life!"
Case Tips:
Mei Feiyue is 21 years old. She once studied in a well-known middle school in Beijing. Due to her abnormal performance in the college entrance examination, she did not get into a prestigious university like her classmates. This became an insurmountable complex in her life in the future.In order to save her face, she made it her sole goal to go abroad quickly after graduation, and even took the road of getting married and going abroad, which was disdained by most young people.
After many difficult conversations with Teacher Xu, she gave up her plan to get married and go abroad. She stood out from the competition of more than 50 people and was hired by the world's number one American financial company.This success dispelled Mei Feiyue's shadow of falling into a prestigious university in China, and brought her hope of entering a world-renowned university.
definition
Controllable nuclear fusion: It is said that seawater contains endless energy. The way to extract energy from seawater is called nuclear fusion.But nuclear fusion can only occur in the form of instant explosion at present, and cannot be controlled, stored, and transported for human use.And once controllable nuclear fusion can be realized, every drop of seawater will become a sun.The ancient dreams of mankind can be realized, and civilization can last forever.
Controllable nuclear fusion of life: Life also accumulates endless energy.A person can become a vagabond or become Napoleon; a person can become a psychopath or become Beethoven;Just like every drop of sea water, every person contains huge energy that shakes the earth.The key is how to detonate the potential of your life, and store, transport, release, and burn in a controllable way!This is the concept of life-controllable nuclear fusion and the significance of researching this concept.Mastering life-controllable nuclear fusion technology, every ordinary person can become a great light source, illuminating the world of himself and others.
The theme of this article is how Mei Feiyue, an ordinary but special girl, controlled her impulse to go abroad, her time of going abroad, and her passion through careful conversations and planning with me at the New Oriental Consulting Office. Transnational marriage, finally realized her controllable life nuclear fusion, and waiting to shock the world... The object Mei Feiyue is a girl who is both ordinary and special.
I say she is ordinary because she is studying at an ordinary university in Beijing, her major is accounting, her grades are generally average, and her TOEFL score is 610, which is obviously not amazing; eloquent species.Although it looks pretty, it still can't make Mr. Xu incoherent, although I often do this.
She is special because the appearance of Mei Feiyue marks the birth of a new era of studying abroad.In order to study abroad, and not to study abroad later, she met me several times, had a difficult conversation with me, was angrily criticized by me, and persistently searched for me in the following days, and finally listened to my opinion , From then on, I embarked on the road to Rome that I designated for her, and wrote my beautiful poems about studying abroad with my youth full of wisdom and enthusiasm.
Mei Feiyue is a special but ordinary girl.
She is special because for the first time, she has gained the controllability to make it happen and develop according to her will.This ability to control one's own future according to one's own will is indeed a new phenomenon in the history of Chinese youth struggle.She has gained a kind of freedom: she can control the rhythm of her life in terms of time factors such as study abroad time, working time, and marriage time, and in terms of space factors such as going abroad, not going abroad, studying, or not studying but getting a job, and seek her greatest happiness. Interests, precise pursuit of various goals in the life of overseas students.When a person has the ability to control his own destiny in time and space, it is the day when the controllable nuclear fusion of life is realized.Everyone has the great power to explode the atomic bomb of life.
Because of her generality, her case has a more special significance.Since Mei Feiyue, as an ordinary person, can achieve a great life, what else can you not achieve?As long as you master the ability to control nuclear fusion in your life, everyone can realize their most distant dreams like Mei Feiyue.
Controllable study abroad
In the summer of 1999, Mei Feiyue asked her father to bring her to me.I don't know her father.Her father was introduced by another friend.In this way, I found my office in New Oriental, in order to help her realize her dream of studying abroad as soon as possible.
Mei Feiyue graduated from a very famous middle school, and all her classmates studied in famous schools like Peking University and Tsinghua University.But unfortunately, on the day of the college entrance examination, she ate too much royal jelly—her father recalled that she forgot to eat it and was waiting for the exam—so she didn’t perform well on the spot, and she was only admitted to an ordinary college. Become the big one.From then on, Mei Feiyue in her late adolescence had a very stubborn wish: to study abroad as soon as possible, and show it to her classmates in a hurry.What bulls do you have at Peking University and Tsinghua University? I went to the United States and pissed you off.This dream helped Mei Feiyue conquer her inferiority complex, brought motivation, revived her youth, and found Teacher Xu.
At that time, Meifeiyue University had just finished her sophomore year and had just finished the TOEFL test, but she was still two years away from the GRE.What she asked of me was: Can I help her go abroad in the year she graduates?If yes, what major do you want to study abroad?No matter what the major is, as long as she can go abroad, she really can't conquer her desire to save the face she lost in the college entrance examination.Although her friends in Peking University and Tsinghua University have undergone profound changes in the concept of going abroad, they no longer care too much about whether she went to the United States or the United States.When Mei Feiyue's values were still anchored at the level of the college entrance examination a few years ago, her other classmates had already passed the ten thousand mountains, and they were directly on the sea of opportunities in the Chinese talent market!
After hearing about Mei Feiyue's situation, I immediately told her and her parents: Mei Feiyue should not go abroad immediately after graduation.If she wants to have a big future, she should stay and work in China for two or three years after graduation.It is best to polish yourself in a famous foreign company.While working, while accumulating experience, while learning English.After working for two or three years, take the GMAT test, apply to famous American universities based on your work experience, and enter the best state of studying abroad in one fell swoop.
In the summer of 1999, there was a movement of studying abroad, and there was a trend of not studying abroad if it was controllable, and working in China first if it was controllable.However, the prophets often make this choice unconsciously.Under my guidance, Mei Feiyue was forced to choose to become a representative of this trend.
The reasons why I asked Mei Feiyue to work in China for two or three years before going abroad to study: 1. Mei Feiyue majored in industrial accounting.This profession is very popular in the market.It is possible to find fairly well paid jobs within the country.In particular, the world's top five accounting firms are expanding rapidly in China.Coupled with the large number of foreign companies entering China, in the Chinese job market in the next few years, the demand for accounting by foreign companies will be very urgent.Especially when a person possesses the qualities required by foreign companies, they will be the most sought-after people in the world.Mei Feiyue is a hot commodity in the Chinese job market, white-collar beauties.
2. I know that Mei Feiyue is not interested in working in China.What she longs for is to go abroad as soon as possible, the sooner the better, it is best to leave tonight.But Mei Feiyue's major determines that she should not go abroad too early.Accounting is a practical business subject.Although accounting does not sound romantic, it has the greatest freedom of employment and career choice in the modern economic society.After Mei Feiyue has worked in this field for a period of time, she can find a career she likes to radiate past and enter the career world of her dreams.After working for two years or more and accumulating considerable experience, Mei Feiyue is fully prepared to go to the United States for further study: she can go to the United States to continue studying accounting, or go to the United States to study finance, insurance, real estate, marketing , management, marketing, etc. There are countless majors that guarantee that she can earn a lot of money after graduation.The work experience in any company, as long as she earnestly does this job well, will become an eloquent background for her to choose a lifelong career in the future.
3. Couldn't Mei Feiyue go directly to the United States after graduation?The answer is that you can go directly.But there is no great future for taking such a road of going abroad.MBA schools in the United States generally require applicants to have two or three years or even longer work experience.If you have no work experience, good schools will not consider you at all, let alone self-funded, even if you donate to others, they will not want you.This is the characteristic of MBA, and it is also the common characteristic of all Professional majors.Therefore, if Mei Feiyue went to study in the United States directly without work experience in China, she would be able to go there, but she would definitely not be able to enter a really good school.Mei Feiyue's purpose of going abroad, fundamentally speaking, is to tap the greatest potential in herself and realize the highest value of her life.Especially for majors such as MBA, if you enter the best school, you can bring a very strong background to Mei Feiyue's future.After all, isn't she going to compete with her classmates at Peking University and Tsinghua University?Going to an ordinary school, how can you make the buddies and sisters of Peking University and Tsinghua University admire you?After all, Mei Feiyue's desire to study abroad is nothing more than a girl's prayer and youthful vanity.Parents don't know the essence, and they think that Feiyue is a good daughter with ideals and pursuits.
4. "If you go to the United States directly after graduation, what's the harm?" Her father asked me tremblingly.I say there are definitely downsides.Although she can sing her graduation song, sing and dance to the United States at any time, the question is, what if she goes to the United States?What about after graduation?With no work experience, it is difficult for her to find a job she really likes in the United States after graduation, because what Americans value most is your specific experience.Back to China?If you have no experience in China before you leave, it will be difficult to get a job that satisfies her, or because you have no experience.After struggling to study in the United States for two years, she realized that her starting point was nothing more than that. At that time, Mei Feiyue would see that she had lost a lot in the race of life compared with her classmates at Peking University and Tsinghua University.The road to going abroad is brilliant, but it must be taken step by step.Mei Feiyue's eagerness to go abroad is like the Australian race walking queen in the 2000 Olympic Games. In order to show the pride of the kangaroo's hometown in front of her compatriots, she actually regarded the race walking as a race.Although he was fast like a mouse, he was still fined out of Changchun. This really echoes an old saying in the Chinese people: Haste makes waste.
Conclusion: Mei Feiyue has a future in China after graduation; this future will definitely bring Mei Feiyue a better future for studying in the United States; Job prospects; a better job prospect after graduation is the highest state that the Psalms of studying abroad in the United States want to sing.What else does Mei Feiyue need?Why didn't Mei Feiyue do this?
Come to me after working for two years after graduation!This was the sweltering summer night in 1999, when I faced Mei Feiyue and her parents in the dilapidated office of New Oriental, planning her future and tailoring her life.
But Mei Feiyue fell into a desperate situation, and her mood became visibly bad.After going through a lot of hardships, she found Mr. Xu, an expert on going abroad. Unexpectedly, Mr. Xu's advice was to tell her not to go abroad.The fire of youth that had been suppressed for two years hadn't burned yet, but was extinguished by him with an authoritative fire extinguisher.How to swallow this breath.
controllable sanity
Mei Feiyue is so controlled by her inferiority complex of failing the college entrance examination.She said she must go at once.The reason is very simple, because the middle school students are so good.If she didn't leave sooner, she would really lose face.Seeing her so stubborn, I was filled with sympathy and hatred.Vanity and inferiority complex, face and vanity, are the traps and enemies of youth for many people?
So I said:
"Don't live for others, but live for yourself. Even if your parents force you to go abroad immediately, don't pay attention to them. Because the road to go abroad is your life path, and whether you walk it well or not will determine your life. Quality. You can live without any quality, but you must pursue the quality of life. Your classmates may congratulate you for a minute after hearing the news of your going abroad, but they will worry about their own thoughts in a blink of an eye. People People are too busy with their own affairs, who will be sincerely happy or suffering for you? You want to go abroad for "striving", in fact, it is a loser mentality, and it is a mutated pursuit that deviates from the goal of life. The starting gun After the sound, everyone is sprinting towards the finish line in front of you, but Mei Feiyue, you are running wildly to the side.
"People should not live for vanity, but live for substance. You have worked in China for two or three years, and what you have gained is real experience. This experience, apart from the education you get, is the most important aspect of your quality of life. The important substance and essence. Education and experience are the essence of life; fame and admiration are the vanity of youth. The essence should be brewed, not the glitz. Because the essence nourishes life, the glitz is fleeting. Unfortunately, How many people can do this on the road of studying abroad, which is itself a flashy road? If not encountering serious setbacks in front of life, tragedies and failures teach them lessons, how many people can heed the call of reality , without being tempted by the glitz?
"People should not live for the means, but for the purpose. Going abroad is the means, and the future is the purpose. The green card is the means, and freedom is the purpose. The United States is the means, and China is the purpose. Sometimes, even love is just a means. Majestic sex is the purpose. (Thats why once the love is separated, it is easy to have a third party, a third party intervenes) Mei Feiyue, you want to go abroad urgently, analyze and analyze carefully, the root cause is actually just to go abroad, you have no purpose. The purpose of going abroad is success in career and life, but you are not pursuing success, so you have no purpose. Now, Mr. Xu, I ask you not to use the method of going abroad for the time being, and work for a few years before going abroad, because Mr. Xu knows the highest state of studying abroad It is the pursuit of success. Look at Yu Minhong, and you know that going abroad is not the purpose at all—who is Yu Minhong? Mei Feiyue doesn’t know! Then look at Wang Zhidong, this guy has never studied abroad. If you take it as fashion as your goal, you will fall into a misunderstanding in life. The correct attitude is: If studying abroad can make you great, study abroad; but if you can be successful without studying abroad, don’t study abroad.”
Mei Feiyue was almost convinced by me.But she looked at her dad as if she had something to say.Dad encouraged her to speak up.So Mei Feiyue said: Mr. Xu, what you said may make sense.But there is one thing I haven't told you yet.This summer vacation, one of my aunts, a colleague of my mother, and her son came back from the United States to visit relatives, they introduced me, we are very that, and we have established a relationship.He wanted me to go abroad early, so this was one of the reasons why I was eager to go abroad.
After hearing this reason, I was silent for a long time.It was late.I talked about the mountains all day, and I was more tired than a woodcutter chopping firewood.I looked at Mei Feiyue, who was so driven by the desire to go abroad that she lost her rationality, and said sadly: That's how it is!In this case, the situation is different.Let me think about it and talk about it next time.
In the twilight, I sent Mei Feiyue's family away and walked back to New Oriental's office.Looking at the beautiful picture album that Mei Feiyue's father gave me, I was full of depression.Depressed that my thoughts have not found a market here in Meifeiyue, and depressed that my language is not strong enough to affect everyone.My success is getting every child to follow my life design, and Mayfair doesn't.I was depressed that night.
But I am even more depressed that Chinese children and families are eager to go abroad, almost desperate.An outstanding child and family like Mei Feiyue can't see the unparalleled brilliant future, but they are eager to pursue an obviously mediocre way to go abroad.In China, how many people like this are there!
Save the children and parents, save the future and glory!
To know how Mei Feiyue was rescued, let's see the breakdown in the next chapter.
controllable marriage
It was a whole year after meeting Mei Feiyue again. 2000.I haven't changed much in the past year, but Mei Feiyue has become calmer and more mature.Because of maturity, there is a little more femininity.
Speaking of the last time we met and said goodbye, Mei Feiyue said that the son of her mother's colleague came back from the United States to visit relatives and met her, and the two were very "interesting".Although this meant, I later said that it was not "meaningful" at all.But Mei Feiyue told me that this relationship has lasted for more than a year. "The relationship between the two has been established."That guy hoped that she would go abroad to get married soon.Therefore, this also constitutes one of the reasons why Mei Feiyue wants to go abroad early.
Mei Feiyue said: Teacher Xu, I know it is wrong to go abroad for vanity.So, I decided not to go abroad for vanity for the time being.However, I came to see you today. I want to ask you whether it is a legitimate reason to go abroad for marriage. My boyfriend, or fiance, is very anxious to urge me to go early in the United States. I think I still want to go early. What do you suggest?
After hearing the first half of Mei Feiyue's words, I was very happy at first, but it turned out that she still wanted to leave in a hurry, and it was for a worse reason.My heart became depressed again.I know I'm going to feel sorry for that overseas student—although I have never met him, we are both international students who have shared our fate.I have no reason to hurt him.But I have no reason to hurt Mei Feiyue in front of me.Agreeing her to go to America to marry him is against the principles of my thinking, and I can't help expressing my opinion.I gritted my teeth and made one of the most guilty choices I've ever made in a consultation.
So I said:
"Absolutely don't go to the United States to marry him. Don't hesitate to follow the formula for your future that I gave you last year. Your future is still only the greatest, and it is the most in line with the most fundamental interests of your personal development."
It is said that you don't need a reason to love someone.But there are a hundred reasons not to go to the United States to get married.So, in this season of love in 2000, I played the role of preventing others from getting married.And achieved this goal passionately: "Mei Feiyue, you are still young, you are only 20 years old. When you were 20 years old, you pursued a single life, not chasing after another. Young people still have to pursue backward pursuits. Mei Feiyue, you can’t live like this. You will have more free love in the future. You can’t lock up your bone in other people’s flower houses when the dandelion of love has not yet flown against the wind. Your heart is hidden in the pistil, and you always miss the flowering period; your heart flies to the United States, and no one will ever understand. At that time, you will definitely suffer from depression. If you don’t have it, you will get it. You once wanted to give up your future for vanity, You don’t want a career anymore; now, you want to reject love for marriage even more, and you don’t even want freedom. Why do you always have such stupid choices!?
"Love? You say you love him. It's a self-deceiving lie. You don't love him. Don't argue with me. If you don't love him, you don't love him! You don't love him either. You just love his green card and his coat for studying in the United States. What an outstanding young man, New Oriental has so many outstanding single male teachers, you and your parents will not consider introducing you. But when an American student comes here, your parents are eager to agree to marry you. The root cause is still because of him You are dazzled by the camouflage uniform of studying in the United States. Think about it again: if he decides to drop out of American schools for you now, return to Beijing to study for graduate students, and get along with you day and night, you think you will still be with him Married? No. That’s the crux of the matter. It’s true that the coat looks sexy when you study in the United States, but once you go to the United States and become an international student yourself, the coat is worthless. Then you can take off the coat In fact, he doesn’t have one more big head muscle and two belly buttons than others. No matter how you look at it, you are not mysterious, no matter how you look at it, you will regret it endlessly. This is the second choice of endless regret.
"Marrying him, where is your own worth? When you met him last year, you were only a sophomore in college. It is a low-price auction to find someone to match yourself out so eagerly! And the bidders include your parents, his His parents and himself, from this point of view, I don’t think that guy is a thing in itself (forgive me, for the sake of writing, this innocent person is also belittled). You are a victim, although participating in the auction of your Everyone is a loved one who loves you. The mistake of this behavior is that they not only ignore the possible achievements of you as an excellent college student, but also ignore your right to find your own value, and put your happiness And freedom, hooking up with an international student, don’t you think this is a doubt about your ability, a denial of your potential, and an insult to your personality? This is the wrong choice three to deny your own value.
"I don't deny that you have the possibility of being happy by marrying him and going abroad. But you should think about the inevitability of achieving success by yourself without marrying him. If you choose the former, you will leave your fate in the hands of others If you choose the latter, you carry your future on your shoulders! Between necessity and possibility, we choose necessity; between others and ourselves, we choose ourselves; between independence and dependence, we choose independence; Between freedom and safety, we choose freedom! You have no choice, my dear! It's choosing independence, choosing freedom, choosing to marry the true American spirit. Independence is the fourth and freedom is the fifth. One out of five makes five, two Fifty ten. As long as you do the first five well, don’t go to the United States to get married and stay in China to finish your undergraduate degree, and then go abroad after accumulating work experience. According to the controllable timetable I gave you, your future, Including love and married life, you will be very satisfied!"
Since the 1980s, many women have gone abroad through introductions.There are happy people, or at least seemingly happy people.However, in the 21st century, with the development of China and the opening up of the country, Chinese people have more ways to go abroad. The comparison between Chinese society and Western society is no longer so hopeless. Many indicators have even caught up with or exceeded the world average. (When I was writing this article in the early spring of 2002, it was reported that according to a report by an international evaluation agency, the quality of life in Beijing and Shanghai had surpassed Hong Kong).A girl like Mei Feiyue, who comes from a good family and has good qualities, already has the ability to obtain the best happiness by herself, and is fully qualified to face the world's best talents to launch her own bold and confident challenge.But despite such advantages, she still wants to take advantage of her marriage to go abroad, which is simply the residue of an arranged marriage. In the whole marriage farce, the only thing that made Mei Feiyue and her family feel at ease was that The "not bad" assessment of the man from afar.Love should be passionate and blindingly crazy, not just "not bad" enough.Although material factors can not be ruled out for marriage, girls with good conditions like Mei Feiyue actually don't need to take this step at all, and can obtain more guaranteed happiness.
Why does the phenomenon of Mei Feiyue appear?It's just because her parents don't know the truth about studying abroad, because her uncles and aunts don't tell the truth about the United States, and because the society's vulgar attitude towards studying abroad has not been finally settled!This is why there is a girl like Mei Feiyue. It is a bad choice to stick to this mediocre path.
Mei Feiyue's face was flushed, and she was rendered speechless by my analysis.Suddenly, she held her breath and said to me in a gaffe: "Then if I go abroad, if I like him, I will live with him, and if I don't like him, I will leave him? Wouldn't it solve the freedom and what you said? Is there a question of independence, what self, what love?"
I looked at her with a smile on my face and a sigh in my heart.A girl from a family like Mei Feiyue would not do such a thing.If she would do such a thing, I would not be able to say the above.For an overseas student, it is not easy to find a partner. When he puts all his wealth and property on this marriage that determines his happiness in life, and only welcomes a bride who is not sincere to him, their relationship will be difficult. Break down quickly and life can deteriorate dramatically.In this case, his reaction may be worse than any man in the country, and her life may be more hopeless than in any environment in the country.
If you don't have a firm belief in love, but only combine for external things, this kind of combination is actually fornication, which is twice as bad as extramarital affairs!Because this is a double deception to yourself and to others (and extramarital affairs are just deceiving others).Anyone's feelings cannot be deceived, especially the feelings of overseas students due to the loneliness and loneliness of living overseas.
"Don't accept a marriage that you don't believe in. Since you don't believe in the marriage and love you really want, reject him quickly! Promise me, Mei Feiyue."
My consultation with Mei Feiyue was so passionate and sincere, it seemed to others that I was proposing to her.
I agree, there is indeed love at first sight in the world.But you have to be very careful about falling in love with foreign students at first sight.Like many cross-border marriages, the foundation of love is often based on a green card or some other material desire.The woman in the book fell in love with the German, and she couldn't do without the hugeness of the foreigner.The sky and the earth are big, not as big as Mark's stuff.No wonder a book like this has problems.A love based on something that gets smaller—and matter that dies—is small even if it's big.As far as human emotions are concerned throughout the ages, it is certainly not long-term.Because there are mountains outside the mountains, and there are big ones in the big ones. Taking size as your destination is not only a blasphemy for love, but it is actually a prison, a cocoon, and a prison.There were a few tears at first, but in the end she was really crying.She told me: "Ms. Xu, I actually need your words to hit me. I have thought about all the truths you said (I am amazed that girls are really mature now!), but I just can't get out of my own psychology. Misunderstanding, you finally caught me completely! I will write to him when I go back, let him go his own way, and marry himself. Don’t bother me. What love, I only met once, and I want to marry me Get married! I want to stay in China, listen to you, work hard for a few years, and go abroad to study an MBA from a top school in the future."
I was really touched. In the New Oriental Consulting Office, I resolved a pair of transnational love, detonated a potential marriage bomb, saved the relationship of a lonely and sincere student studying in the United States, and ignited an ordinary but promising Chinese female college student. future of struggle.Hallelujah!Although at this time, I was almost exhausted and had a nervous breakdown.
controllable life
In the early summer of 2001, it was the third year since I met Mei Feiyue.I received a call from Mei Feiyue.Mei Feiyue was on the other end of the phone, and broke down in tears as soon as my phone was connected, which shocked me.I said: Mei Feiyue, what happened?
Mei Feiyue said: "Mr. Xu, you don't know how hard it is to find you. I'm almost coming to New Oriental—I have good news to tell you. If I don't tell you, I will be very, very restless."
I prayed in my heart that she didn't tell me about my marriage to America.
"Two years ago, you asked me to give up the idea of going abroad immediately after graduation, and to find a good job in China to accumulate work experience. At that time, I was skeptical and couldn't understand your words. So, a year later, I came to New Oriental to trouble you again.
"A year ago, you asked me to give up my marriage plan with that foreign student, go my own way, love my own people, and put all the ideals of struggle on my shoulders. Although I was shocked and hit again at that time, I still listened to you. take your word for it!
"You let me set the opportunity to find a job in a foreign company after graduation, you let me actively participate in student union activities, you let me suspend the English test and concentrate on speaking English well to deal with the harsh interviews of foreign companies, you let me pursue fashion, sexiness and femininity , It also made me pay attention to training my interpersonal skills and learning to speak in public... "Mr. Xu, I want to tell you that I have worked hard to do everything you taught me, and all this has produced amazing results Effect——Last week, I was admitted as a full-time employee by the world's number one financial investment institution. There were more than 50 applicants in our school, and I was the only one who was hired!A middle school classmate of mine at Peking University, after four interviews, was finally defeated!I'm so proud" What I want to tell you is that I started to work as an intern last week, and I saw many brothers and sisters. Their suggestions for me to study abroad are the same as what you and I said. I have accumulated three or four years in China. Many of them left the country in this way and went to good schools; some returned to China in this way, and those who returned had good jobs. I really saw that the top MBA schools abroad are really good. right by my side.
"I feel that being able to meet you in New Oriental two years ago was really the best turning point in my life. Teacher, I don't know how to thank you. I will do whatever you want me to do..." Mei Fei Yue was really excited to cry on the phone.
My heart was already thinking about how to take the visa consultation class in the afternoon, and I almost forgot Mei Feiyue on the other end of the phone.Because, the energy in Mei Feiyue's life has been forcibly stored by me into her energy pool, and I just wait for the time when it will come to release.If she can't go to the top 20 business administration schools in the United States, the dean of the top 20 business schools in the United States will take the blame and resign.
As far as the life stage of planning and preparing for studying abroad is concerned, I have assisted Mei Feiyue to complete her controllable life nuclear fusion.My contribution to her has also been perfectly realized.She no longer needs my guidance.So, I don't remember what we talked about afterwards.
Are there any classmates who release their life energy in vain?May Mei Feiyue's story give you some inspiration.
◎Comment by Yu Minhong
The story of Mei Feiyue is a story about studying abroad planning, and it is also a case of life design with special technical value.When is the best time to go abroad?Mei Feiyue made many mistakes in her judgment of her own life.For example, going abroad for the sake of vanity, getting married for the sake of going abroad, and going abroad for the sake of going abroad are all misunderstandings in life.She was really lucky to find Xu Xiaoping.
However, I think Mei Feiyue's proposition has a more serious meaning: her problem is not purely a problem of how to choose and control the timing of going abroad.Her story actually reflects the loss of the ultimate value of Chinese youth.If a person does not see the ultimate goal of life, does not know how to live meaningfully, or does not see that through struggle and the passage of time to have a better dream, it will lead to short-sighted behavior.All of Mei Feiyue's choices, and the conflicts behind all these choices, are all caused by short-term thinking.
Inertia often leads people to make seemingly easy choices, but they are likely to ruin their lives.This is tantamount to drinking poison to quench thirst.The story of Mei Feiyue is actually a phenomenon of drinking poison to quench thirst in the field of studying abroad, but within three to five years, you can’t see the harm of this poison, and the reason why this poison is still fascinating is that its toxicity cannot be surpassed by other people. High success and better social development cannot be seen.
People are lazy.For example, if there are two things, one is easy to do and the result is not bad, while the other is difficult to do and the result is unpredictable, people usually choose the former, and this choice will hinder the long-term, deeper, A more purposeful choice.Short-sighted people can easily see what they can get today, but they cannot see what they can get tomorrow or in the future.The public value judgments in society are based on this kind of inert thinking. The characteristic of this kind of inert thinking is that they only know today and don’t know tomorrow, and they only know one thing and don’t know the other.Mei Feiyue wanted to get married and go abroad because she wanted to take a shortcut.It is easy for people to lose their own judgment under the public value judgment standard, and it is difficult for a person to see himself beyond the eyes of the public.For example, until today, the value judgment standard of the Chinese public is that going abroad will definitely be better than domestic, so many parents send their children abroad when they are in junior high school or high school, and even push their children to the fire pit, in fact, in order to win a public value judgment standard Affirmation: You see my child has gone abroad, and at the same time I feel that sending my child abroad is better than staying in China.
It is already great for a person to surpass the public value judgment standard to position himself. It is impossible for a freshman or sophomore like Mei Feiyue to do this, and her parents are representatives of the public value system. Let a child超越她的父母去建立一套自己的系统是不可能的。好在她遇到了徐小平，改变了她的价值判断系统，完成了她基于终极价值的人生设计。
四月之所以残忍，是因为本文主人公令人嫉妒得窒息的成功。罗娑在徐小平的指导下，放弃了和单位领导进行你死我活内斗的决定和拼命到底的意志。她获得了世界户口：哈佛金奖、管理智慧、国际素质、无限前程。
Case Tips:
罗娑，女，毕业于安徽某大学社会学专业研究生班。在北京师范大学任教。为了出国留学，她一面在新东方上课，一面在校外兼课挣钱，为此领导声言要开除她，还要取消她的北京户口。
徐小平唇枪舌剑，使又土又凶的罗娑心悦诚服。解脱了户口、工作、人际关系，进入世界领先企业，2001年她同时获得世界顶尖的五所商学院的录取，其中四所有全额奖学金。从她找徐老师咨询到最终进入哈佛，这个过程不到四年时间。
哈佛耶鲁全要她，苛刻责备斯坦福
据说四月是残忍的季节，但我一直搞不清楚这句话是什么意思。直到2001年的这个月份，我见到罗娑之后，才理解了这句话的含义和分量。
罗娑是我四年前就认识的新东方学生，也是四年来一直断断续续和我有联系的学生。她在电话里告诉我，她要见我的原因，是要当面向我报告她被哈佛以及其他几个美国顶尖商学院录取的喜讯。问题是她的消息实在是太好了，好到了令我这样的成功人士都嫉妒和生气的程度：在美MBA帝国五个顶尖商学院里，有四个大学给了她奖学金和入学资格，惟一没有给她奖学金的，是斯坦福大学，但也给了她无数人梦寐以求的入学录取通知。
罗娑的成功是一个奇迹。但是她假装不满地说：“我感到生气的是斯坦福居然不给我奖学金！”
这下轮到我生气了。我说：“你太庸俗了。说这种话的人，是文化势利主义者。你已经获得这么了不起的成就，却还故作姿态不高兴，你让我们这些什么也没有得到的人，怎么活下去呢！”
“感谢上帝吧。感谢她(She)给了你这么伟大的求学机会，感谢她(She)给了你这么响亮的优秀证明。上帝一定是个女的，否则，她不会给你这么大的成功，不会给你这么丰盛的收获！”
四月是残忍的季节。四月十五日，是美国大学奖学金截止的日子。有人成功，有人失败，有人欢笑，有人哭泣。有人能够获得累计几十万美元的奖学金，有人却连一个铜板都得不到。像我当年那样！对新东方更多奋斗一年或数年却什么也没有捞到的学员，罗娑令人侧目的成功真的很残忍。不过，作为罗娑，她的青春与才华，应该在四月的阳光下尽情绽放。
罗娑的成功，证明了我们在新东方宣传的“十年树木，五年树人”的重大留学思想和成才观念的成功。看着在四月的阳光下尽情绽放的罗娑，我无论如何，也无法把眼前的她和四年前的那个寒酸愤怒的女生联系起来。
土而凶恶罗娑恨，化恨为爱罗娑美
1997年的4月，我在新东方咨询处和学生谈话。一个土而凶恶的女孩来到我的面前。她是土是洋，其实与我无关。但她的凶恶，却使我害怕。回家睡觉，好几天都有点不安全感。她的眼睛闪着荧荧的光，她的嘴里吐出嘶嘶的声。
“徐老师，我想和我的单位领导拼了！”罗娑脸色发白，嘴唇发紫，眼睛发绿，青丝发直。
罗娑刚从安徽一个非重点大学获得硕士学位，学的是社会学。经过惨重努力，付出不少关系人情，她获得了一个进京户口指标，到了北京师范大学研究生部当老师。
罗娑在安徽读研究生课程时上过一些外教课，而且一部分教科书是英语原版，所以她的英语相当不错。虽然来自外地，但是一开口，虽然普通话夹着淮北口音，但一口美式英语并不比北京外企那些气宇轩昂的人差。
拥有硕士学位和流利的英语，罗娑来到北京后开始非常顺利。她也非常努力卖命地工作，开始憧憬她的未来。
她的未来是什么，她自己并不知道。社会学是这样一门学科，说它有用非常有用，说它没用非常没用。关键是你本人到底是否具有运用社会学知识为自己在这个飞速发展的人才市场上寻找的机会。我认识许多社会学的朋友，他们在众多的岗位上做出了非常杰出、相当独特的成绩，令人振奋。一个朋友在美国最大的公关公司做中国地区副总裁、一个朋友成了一家报社的总编辑。
但是罗娑想做什么？罗娑能做什么？因为不知道，所以这时候的罗娑，只想和单位领导拼命。我以为单位领导一定是个十恶不赦的大恶棍。但听到最后，却发现什么事情也没有。
因为迷茫，罗娑来北京不久，就开始来新东方报班上课，筹划自己留学的事情。出于留学费用的考虑，罗娑同时还在业余时间做一些兼职教课的工作。这两件事引起了单位领导的强烈不满，认为这个女孩子不是一个好东西，居然一来北京就蠢蠢欲动不务正业，不仅人想出国而且业务上还要出墙。也许这也是一个四月，领导嗅觉中闻到了残忍并且血液中也涌动着残忍，于是和罗娑这样一个娇小的南方女孩摆开阵势较起劲来。领导让她自己做出选择：要么天天坐班，放弃兼课工作和新东方听课，要么就把她的户口迁回安徽去，让她一辈子去听黄梅戏(而不听交响乐)！
七仙女的MM罗娑就这样来到我的面前，向我咨询她的人生问题。带着满腔愤怒与屈辱，罗娑问我除了和单位那个“无耻的、卑鄙的、狭隘的”领导拼到底，搞个鱼死网破，还有没有其他什么办法？
“徐老师我昨天和他非常剧烈地大吵一顿，他威胁要把我从单位开除，并注销我的北京户口。我的困境是，这个单位我是回不去了，而且北京户口也难保。我的工作和户口一下子都没了的话，我今后可怎么办呢？
“真的，徐老师，你知道我的北京户口来之不易。这种领导居然想从这里下手，真的是太可恶了——我真的恨不得把他杀了。”
罗娑从口袋里拿出指甲刀，在指尖慢慢搓，看她咬牙切齿的样子，我想她一定沉浸在杀人的快感中。难怪五年之后首都机场要收缴指甲刀和针线包呢。
看着“走投无路”的罗娑，我似乎听到一个声音在告诉我，有问题的不是那个领导同志，党派他来管罗娑，自有党的道理。有问题的，肯定是罗娑小姐本人。因为，一个正常的可爱的知识女性，即使爱憎分明，也不会把同志当作敌人，发出死亡威胁。
“那个领导”(天底下有多少“那个领导”)再可恶，其实只不过是一个性压抑、钱干瘪的中年男子罢了。他再“变态”，其实也只不过是寻求一点权威感、获得一点成就感、要求一点尊重权而已。其实他也是在追求他的基本人权呢！想去美国留学的罗娑却拒绝给他这个基本人权。并且以蔑视人家、侮辱人家、恶攻人家的方式，来刺伤领导的心灵，来争夺自己的权利。罗娑真的不该这样。
这种几乎要出人命的冲突，其实本来完全是可以避免的，而且可以避免出浪漫情怀出来。想想：如果罗娑这样的妙龄女郎，在兼职之前和他打个招呼，在拿了外快之后向他挤个媚眼，送点秋波，赠点水果，其实问题就解决啦。领导也是人，理解万岁嘛！
可惜罗娑不懂这些。其实这只是一种最简单的人际关系。让对你构成最大威胁的人，成为你最好的朋友，化干戈为玉帛，就像美国和日本一样，从原子弹的打击对象，变成了核保护伞下面的盟友，共享五十年的和平繁荣。
美国都会这么做。梦想去美国留学的罗娑，为什么不能这么做？为什么一定要向自己的领导扔原子弹？为什么现在的年轻人，自己不把领导当人看，却要领导把自己当心肝宝贝、独生子女？这是什么无耻要求？这是什么反动逻辑？曾经当过领导的我，深知罗娑这样的女孩子能够给领导的生活带来的什么样的灾难：有时候是崩溃性的，有时候是毁灭性的。
根据这个思想和逻辑，当我对罗娑好好“咨询”了一番之后，她开始变得温柔。当我说到她的痛处和短处时，她居然露出惭愧的笑容——而女孩子一露出惭愧的笑容之时就是她的美丽本性裸露之时，就是那一低头的温柔像水莲不胜寒风的娇羞而感动了诗人徐志摩的时候。
原来罗娑是这么一个美丽可爱的姑娘。我惊奇一个钟头之前，却还没有感觉到一丝这种迹象。
罗娑虽然被我责备得百孔千疮，但脸上的笑容越来越温柔，眼睛里的光芒越来越暖和。最后，罗娑哈哈地笑了。她说她真Stupid(愚蠢)！这么简单的道理还要我来说。
恢复了少女纯真和美好的罗娑问我：那我该怎么办？
领导再坏和为贵，户口再好不要罢
把握了罗娑全部的困惑与追求，于是我说：“怎么办？很简单。先去向领导同志认错。无论如何，你是部下，他是上级。对上级同志，必须要有适当的尊重。你可以和你爸爸妈妈闹分居打离婚，但是领导不是你的爸爸，你必须给他基本的尊重。不能和自己身边的人处理好人际关系的人，不是好人。有出息也不大。
“这个事情做好之后，和他开诚布公谈一次。告诉他你想做什么不想做什么。相信领导一定会给你适当让步和妥协。都是人嘛。如果领导吃错了药，坚持一定要你坐班而你无论如何也不能和他和平共处，那么就辞职别干了。
“北京户口？你不是想出国吗？想出国的人北京户口可以休矣。与其你做户口的奴隶不如让户口做你的垃圾。户口户口，中国的户籍制度必将改革，而改革的最后必将是户口失去它现有的特权与枷锁之功能。正在寻求自由的你，为什么要求社会为你戴上镣铐，戴不上镣铐还要哭着喊着打着闹着你恶心不恶心哪你？(君不见短短的三年之后，北京市为吸引留学生，出台了大量优惠鼓励政策。其中户口所代表的各种权益都在政策里面显示无遗，留学生回国肯定可以获得北京户口而中国大地上户籍改革的烈火几乎在遍地燎原)。
“中国社会有许多东西，看上去神圣无比，其实一钱不值。许多在今天搞得别人走投无路的价值标准和政策权威，明天可能就是狗屎一堆。政府有时候出于无聊会做一些规定让你感到幽默，有时候又会出台一些东西让你看见希望。不合理的东西在中国正在全面土崩瓦解，合理的东西在中国如同旭日东升。作为一个有出息有理想的年轻人，最重要的是如何看待这些现象，并调整自己的行动。为了未来，调整自己的步伐，而不要为了过去，耗费你的资源。
“你的条件要留学是毫无问题的，我坚决支持你。但是最好不要着急。告诉我你想出国学什么？Business? MBA?如果你的追求是真诚的话，你就应该离开这个教学单位而去一个真正的商业公司，去积累你的Business的经验。你的英语很好，你的长相不坏，而且你还会吵架——这说明你的人际关系虽然不好但人际交流能力挺不错。就像战争能力是一个国家综合国力的象征，吵架能力也是个人综合能力的一个集中表现呢。真的！就看你把这个力量是用于破坏还是用于建设了。
“假如你的目标是去美国读MBA的话，你已经具备了许多必要的条件。但你最大的弱点是在大学里面泡到今天，没有实际操作经验，更没申请MBA所需要的某个特定商业领域里面的背景。你应该去外企，或者私企，或者任何一个蓬勃发展的代表着先进生产力的机构去，从零做起，从头做起，从小秘和大厨做起(假如需要的话)，一直做到总经理助理做到敢在领导头上拉屎而不被开除。这就是成功。
“我给你一个日程吧：一个月之内离开这个你感到压抑的单位，两个月之内自己把这个户口扔掉——我不反对你当着领导的面剪给他看，假如你一定要这么做的话。三个月之内在现代企业里找一份工作重新开始你的奋斗。好好干两年，两年之内不要来新东方读任何东西，而只集中精力做好你的工作，成为你选择的领域里面的优秀专业人士。你的教育程度在这里，我相信你学任何东西都会学得非常杰出非常精彩。如果英语是第一工作语言的话最好，如果不是，那么你应该为自己创造条件，说好用好日常英语。如何创造条件，这是你的事我就不管了。
“第三个年头开始的时候，你来新东方，读一个托福和GMAT班，并争取在第三年内，拿到这两个考试的高分。要想去一流学校，托福至少得有630，GMAT呢，大约700上下吧，虽然并非越高越好。这样，第四年开始的时候，开始申请你的美国商学院，好好把你的教育和工作背景整理整理，精心包装起来，递交到哈佛、耶鲁去，我相信你肯定可以得到哈佛、至少耶鲁的录龋“你的大学不是名牌大学不要紧。国外著名商学院最看重的，是你的工作经验、以及你在申请的材料和过程中展示出来的交流和表达能力。如果一个没有进过名牌大学的人都能达到申请名牌大学的水平，那么一个名牌大学的MBA教育，将给她带来多么惊人的提升。这是国外大学看人才的一个思路。国外大学越来越重视进行个别面试，所以，口语和交流能力甚至举止表现，对你的申请都有决定性意义。而这些能力，仅仅通过学习并不能达到最佳状态，最好还是通过在工作中使用，才能真正成为你自己的素质。未来四年的工作，实际上是你进入哈佛、登上人生顶峰的一个起跑阶段。四年长吗？不长。要知道，著名商学院新生入学的平均工作年龄都是四年以上呢！再说，十年树木，百年树人。我只要你花个四年时间就能达到人生教育的颠峰，我们提倡的人才观念，比传统的教育思想，提前了九十六年！歌唱吧。
“到了哈佛，不要忘记我！”
我和她拉拉手，告别，再见。
道一声再见，道一声再见，这一声再见里，有无限的艳羡。
罗娑讲课我付钱，小平咨询无束修
转眼到了1999年的4月。两年过去了，罗娑如约没有理过我。
我总觉得我还会碰见罗娑，虽然我知道罗娑也许不会再来找我。找我干什么呢？这样聪明的孩子，一次谈话就够了，心有灵犀一点通，其他都是多余的。
但是某种机缘使得我必须在两年之后的这个四月再次见到她。我去参加一个管理咨询的专业培训会议，付了高额学费来学习怎么做生意，没想到讲师席上侃侃而谈的女孩，竟是罗娑！
两年不见，她比当初见我的时候，要显得温柔恬静得多，而且最大的变化是，罗娑已经从一个安徽来的土而凶恶的女人，变成一个北京城里时尚性感的姑娘。我高兴地看着她，惊叹时光带给现代女性的，往往不是青春的流逝，而是魅力的盛宴。
罗娑告诉我：那天她离开我的咨询处，回到师范大学就离开了“那个领导”(可惜她没有听我的话，并没有和领导和解，而是继续把人家羞辱一顿之后说“户口你留着自己用吧”就扬长而去)。
离开户口和大学，她加入了一家世界行业领袖级企业。她真的是从助理开始做起，在外企强大的培训和文化传统的熏陶下，很快就进了门、入了道，成为市场领域里一个专业人士。由于她具有天生的暴力倾向，所以当她把这个破坏天性转化成为创造性行为时，就产生了巨大的功效。她能面对数百专业人士侃侃而谈，谈笑风生。有些商业培训公司要搞讲座，她常常是被邀请的主讲之一。
我问她出场一次多少钱，她非常鄙夷地说：“才五千人民币！真丢人。”我心里就忿忿地想，你听我咨询我免费，我听你胡说却付钱。这世界越来越有问题了。不过我还是非常欣赏她的演讲，欣赏她的表达艺术。我不知道她的留学申请进展如何了，但我知道，如果哈佛大学招生主任就在现场的话，看见她的这个讲演，不用面试，一定直接把她录取了。
从外地普通大学的普通专业社会学硕士，到北京著名公司的热门市场营销学专家，到将来哈佛耶鲁的MBA，我看见罗娑在人才的天空翩翩起舞，在那里，她简直像是天女散花一样，在婀娜多姿地长袖独舞。我听见春江花月夜的玉音从远处飘来。
青年人不怕没有才能，因为受过高等教育的新东方学员，人人都身怀绝技。但身怀绝技的人最怕的，是不去寻找施展才能的机会。罗娑和我的谈话，避免了把绝技用来和别人斗争，也避免了把绝技用在终将过时的偶像崇拜上(比如户口、比如铁饭碗)。她大胆地在市场上找到了自己的用武天地。罗娑的命运向着成功迈进，是历史规律，而历史规律，是不可阻挡的。
在目前的中国人才市场上，有一个非常奇特的现象，一方面大量职业等待着人才来填满，老板经理们成天为人才难得而叫苦连天；另一方面，大量人才成天叹息英雄无用武之地而怨声载道，冠盖满京华，斯人独憔悴，总觉得自己没有生在好时代，没有赶上好机遇。独具慧眼的人，就找到了惊人的机会；因循守旧的人，就错失了千载良机。
这才是人才领域里一个最大误区。传统教育下出来的学生固然有大量不适应市场经济和外企私企文化的思想肿瘤，但只要把自己按市场规律的需求稍做调整，稍做适应，一个崭新的人才就会诞生。一个罗娑，就会站起来。
此时的罗娑，其实已经提前进入了我所说的人生的颠峰状态：往外看，哈佛耶鲁在向她热情地招手，外企外语又外向，她不出去谁出得去？往里看，中国社会在冲她暧昧地微笑，她可以继续做下去，做到吴士宏然后再感叹高处不胜寒。她也可以自己创业，做成张树敏然后再走投无路。她还可以找一个好的老公，做成杨澜但是结婚之前对老公的文凭最好仔细核查核查，只要不是克莱顿或者巴林顿其他不管是普林斯顿还是波士顿都行。实在不行，其实罗娑还有一种美好的生活，干脆做个家庭主妇又有什么不好。好女孩都去哈佛了谁来和优秀的男孩结婚？
“徐老师你在想什么？”罗娑把手在我眼前晃了晃，才把我从遐想中拉了回来。我说今年你应该把几个考试搞完，完了就该申请哈佛了吧？
罗娑耸耸肩膀，表示没有问题。一个外企老板模样的人走过来和她搭话，她抱歉地对我点点头，示意再见，立即把我抛在一边，去和那个该死的家伙热烈地交谈起来。
我无聊地向窗外看看，窗下一株桃花正在怒放。我这才想起，这依然是一个早春4月，为什么我遇见罗娑的日子，都是这个4月，都是这么残忍？
罗娑成功感四月，后跻奋斗谢春天
这样就到了2001年的4月。这个残忍的季节，罗娑拿着残忍的录取，来找我展示她残忍的成功。我眼睛被她的成功刺痛而心里却在为她歌唱。啊，我的太阳，多么灿烂辉煌！暴风雨过去后，天空多晴朗！罗娑懂一点艺术歌曲吗？罗娑理解这个意思吗？
罗娑的整个申请，和我没有任何关系。她根本没有找过我。在她的公司里，她有许多同事来自美国著名商学院，大家都愿意把自己的经验和她分享。加上她和新东方真正留学申请的文书信件写作大师何庆权有同乡之谊(何庆泉是湖北人，罗娑是安徽人，罗娑硬说他们两个是老乡，因为两个省是通过大别山还是什么山接壤的！)。被罗娑的热情烘烤得又脆又酥的何庆权成为罗娑留学申请的总指挥，指导她处理申请材料，告诉她美国商学院最喜欢什么样的人才。几个回合下来，罗娑制作出了非常漂亮的文件，深深地打动了美国的老师们。
在申请入学的过程中，中国学生最难以对付的是入学面试。而这样的面试，罗娑参加了五个，征服了五个考官。要知道，在外企里面，这种人与人面对面的交流沟通，几乎就是每日例行公事。当考官们在中国看见一个如此西方化的女性时，他们没有意识到，罗娑这样的人才，是中国经济全球化时代的必然产物，是一代新人的标志。罗娑的风度气质，就是这一代人越来越普及的行为举止，就是这一代人越来越常见的基本素质。
罗娑是幸运的，她的幸运在于她比别人稍稍早走了一点点。早多久？其实也就领先两三年的样子。
如果罗娑不来新东方，她能获得这种突破性发展吗？她能把户口、工作、上下级关系这些貌似神圣实际上是人身枷锁、看上去无比坚固实际上一触即溃的陈腐扔到垃圾桶里去吗？我相信她做不到。毕竟，这些东西虽然必将过时，但在过时之前，实实在在又是主导中国人生活的灵魂中枢。抛弃他们很容易，但是，如果你需要他们的时候，他们就可能对你的未来构成致命的威胁。这样的状况，构成了中国青年人生奋斗的特别困境，造成了个人选择的独家烦恼。
还有没有在为了那些并不存在的千钧重负而忍辱负重、熬干青春灯油的男人女人？赶快醒来吧。快看罗娑，她已经在哈佛商学院完成第一年学业，正在展望毕业之后的锦绣前程呢！
而她之所以能够展开翅膀飞翔，只是因为她放下了别人都在背着的沉重的十字架，解放了她的生命，解放了她的未来。
罗娑就这样从残忍的四月走来，又残忍地在四月里消失。我前后认识她四年，目睹她从一个外省来的绝望的姑娘变成了哈佛的MBA学生。我希望，她去了哈佛还会记得我——但是又有什么意义呢？sigh.
谁说四月是残忍的季节？我后来发现，这个说法越来越不科学。连罗娑这样出自滥校、来自外盛没有户口、缺少关系、性格恶劣、智商也就如此这般的女孩子，都能在四月的阳光下蜕变为彩蝶而翩翩地飞入哈佛大学这样世界顶级的圣殿读书，我们自己——新东方的广大学员们——还有什么可叹息的呢？只要从罗娑的成功故事中，找到她成功的脉络和路径，然后你模仿着重复就行啦！瞧，入哈佛就这几招！
四月，原来是这样的美丽宁静，这么和平公允。她给绝望的人带来机会，她把卑贱的人送上梦境。她把罗娑，吹到了哈佛；她也会年复一年，应邀而来，把无数新东方的奋斗者，送到太平洋的那边，去迎接人生最灿烂的春天，去拥抱生命最明媚四月。
◎Comment by Yu Minhong
我知道文章中的罗娑是谁，我和这个女孩其实也挺熟的，所以文章里提出的问题，我也相当了解。
生活中很多人都不自觉地走上了误区，实际上都是被庸俗的社会价值观所误导。罗娑是个很倔强的人，倔强的性格加上陈旧的观念，导致她常常为了某些陈旧可笑的价值去拼命，非常可怕。我知道小平这里只写了她留学成功的一面，还没有触及她生活中的其他悲剧。当然，这个故事已经很完整了。
她认为丢了户口