Chapter 8 Chapter Seven Everything seems to happen in a dream

In the United States, food delivery is usually performed by students or wage earners.This job is simple, although you can't make big money, small money is easy to make.One day, someone in the clinic ordered Chinese food, so the delivery person naturally delivered the boxed lunch.That day, I happened to be in the front hall, so I ran into the Chinese food delivery man, his name was Johnson. After a few pleasantries, Johnson showed great interest in psychotherapy, and he asked me if I could find a chance to chat.I know that even in the United States, Chinese people are still not very interested in psychological clinics, so I promised him that he could come to my house for a meeting on the weekend morning.

As expected, Johnson came as promised. As soon as he sat down, his eye circles turned red, and he said, "You know what? I was a millionaire a year ago, and I was well-known in Chinatown. I didn't expect that now It ended up like this." "Then what happened?" "I lost all my money in stocks, and the nasty Nasdaq swallowed all my money. Now I am not only broke, but also in debt. I don't know what happened. It's like everything happened in a dream." "You are unfortunately caught in the worst bear market in American history. As far as I know, the vast majority of people lost a lot last year, but there may not be many people who lost everything like you."

"In retrospect, everything seemed to be possessed by a demon. I went to the temple to ask the mage, and the mage told me that I was burdened by the ghost of the karmic creditor in the previous life. How should I beware of this debt from the previous life. Although the mage told me to repent And accumulate merits and virtues, but I am really unwilling." "The essence of Buddhism is that the generation and evolution of all things in the world are bound by causes and conditions. In short, everything has a cause. As for whether the cause must be traced back to the previous life, it is not necessarily true."

"You mean to say that I might be the present newspaper?" "Buddhism and psychotherapy are the same in terms of causality, but Buddhism pays more attention to the ethical level, while psychotherapy focuses on the logical level. For example, the retribution of the present world in Buddhism means that good will be rewarded with good, and evil will be rewarded with evil, but the problem is The ethical standards of good and evil are not so easy to distinguish, such as doing bad things with good intentions, how to explain? Relatively speaking, the causal theory of psychotherapy only focuses on the standard of reality adaptation. You go from being a millionaire to penniless, not so much that you If you have done something evil, it is better to say that there is something wrong with the way you do it."

"I checked myself and I didn't do anything outrageous. But I'm a risk taker when it comes to the way I do it." "How did you take the risk?" "When I was a child in Fujian, I was a naughty king. I was more courageous than anyone else. Later, I smuggled to the United States. Although I experienced risks at sea, I had no complaints. After I arrived in Chinatown, I worked hard, which others dared not do. I dared to do it, so I made my fortune very quickly.” "Have you ever gambled?" "Gambling?" Johnson smiled dryly: "My life is a gamble, but I used to be very lucky in gambling. In the casino, I was always victorious."

"You never lose?" "Let me tell you, my gambling skills are so good that even the casino puts me on the unwelcome list." "So, you believe that as long as it is a casino, you must be an ever-victorious general." "General Ever Victory?" Johnson sighed, "This time, I fell into the big casino of stocks." "Did you know that even giants like Quantum Fund and Tiger Fund were stunned and knocked down in the Nasdaq market last year. Your failure can be regarded as a lesson in life." "I won't admit defeat, I still want to make a comeback." Johnson gritted his teeth.

"I admire your spirit, but your personality of betting on everything must be adjusted slightly. Otherwise, after a few years, you will repeat the same mistakes in unexpected circumstances." "You mean to say that my failure this time does not have to be attributed to my previous life, but my personality problem in this life?" "That's how psychology sees it." "I understand." Johnson insisted on paying me, I naturally shied away, but seeing his determination, I accepted his money and wished him an early comeback. Throughout Johnson's life, his gambler character has always been the key to his success before he fell into this big somersault.Fortunately, he is strong-willed and willing to examine himself, so I believe he will get up again.But in my psychotherapy, what I see more is that some people make the same mistakes all their lives, falling into a vicious cycle one after another, and the problem often lies in their lack of awareness of their problems.The so-called failure is the mother of success. When failure comes, we must not only explore the failure itself, but more importantly, explore the protagonist himself who caused the failure—that is, a sober analysis of the self.

Listen to a good man complain about cause and effect "It's not easy to do good things in Manhattan." My friend Sue advised me. "Why?" I guessed that Old Su probably had his reasons for saying this. "Well, there is a painful experience that I will never forget." Lao Su, who believed in Buddhism, began to tell his strange story. All his life, Lao Su was kind and charitable. He opened a restaurant in Chinatown. Although it was not a big deal, it was a small business and the business has been booming.When Lao Su is not running a restaurant, he likes to visit temples, and he does some meritorious deeds from time to time. He talks about karma when he sees people, and he lives a good life.

One day, when Lao Su was shopping in a big mall in Manhattan, a black man suddenly slipped and fell in front of him. Holding Lao Su's sleeve, he shouted loudly: "You threw me down, and you will pay me back." Old Su immediately understood that something was wrong, and when he looked carefully, the black man was bleeding profusely. Soon the police came, and Old Su's blunt Cantonese English naturally had the upper hand compared to the black's eloquent tongue.The police took a note, and the black man was rushed to the hospital.A week later, Lao Su received a summons.It turned out that the black man took Old Su to court, and the black man proposed compensation of 1 million US dollars.Old Su was dizzy at first hearing this, and really couldn't understand why he ended up like this after doing good deeds.

Then came endless court appearances and mounting attorney fees.In spite of his pain, Lao Su still used his Buddhist teachings to find a way out. He believed that he must have owed this black man a large sum of money in his previous life, and it seemed impossible to escape in this life. In the end, Lao Su paid 60,000 US dollars in compensation. thing.Although Lao Su still believes in Buddhism, he has changed his principle of teaching people to do good deeds into teaching people not to do good deeds lightly. "Old Su, is this really the case?" After hearing Lao Su's story, I couldn't believe it.

"Hey, you man, $60,000 is not a small amount, can I lie to you?" Seeing Lao Su's angry look, I hurriedly apologized.It seems that Crazy Manhattan really lived up to its reputation. Later, I told this story to my American friend Rob.Rob, a pilot for American Airlines, sighed after hearing my story that it was this bad attitude of not doing good that almost killed him.Rob's personal experience is that he was hit by a car on a street in Manhattan, the car fled, and none of the cars behind stopped.Rob felt paralyzed at the time, unable to move his body at all, but remembered countless cars roaring past him.Rob was terrified to death, but no car stopped to save him. Finally, when the red light came on, he was dragged to the side of the road by a Korean. "This society has long been insensitive. Can you imagine lying on the cold street with cars roaring by above your head and no one reaching out to you? Those drivers who passed my body just put The car slowed down and they stuck their heads out to look at me, and I was like a dog lying on a cold street in Manhattan.” Luo Bo learned Kung Fu from me, and whenever he got a chance, he told people about his near-death experience, feeling like Xianglin Sister-in-law, but I really can understand his painful experience.This kind of thing happened to Luo Bo and Lao Su yesterday, isn't it possible that it will be our turn one day? someone invited me to be a killer There is a deep-rooted prejudice against psychopaths because of the unpredictability with which psychopaths process aggressive impulses.Since I studied clinical psychology, I have never had any worries about this problem. It is because I have learned Chinese martial arts. When I was young, I was always a humble and cowardly person. Fortunately, I was still tall for my age, so I didn’t suffer too much. But once I conflicted with others, I was usually the target of being bullied.I blamed all this on my mother being too strict with me. I was like a mouse in front of her, and naturally I didn't have much prestige in front of others. When I went to college, my timidity and physical clumsiness did not change at all, but my name incongruously had the title of hero.In order to live up to the sacred meaning of my name, I have practiced Shaolin martial arts since 1981.My teacher at that time was Mr. Zhu Jisheng, a famous Zha boxing master; later, I learned gossip from Mr. Zhou Tingjue; Chen style Taiji from Mr. Du Wencai; And Liuhe Bafaquan.The last two kung fu skills are relatively high because they are apprenticed to a teacher.Since I got to know Mr. Wang Leihua in 1989, my relationship has gradually deepened. In the two or three years before I left Shanghai, Mr. Wang Leihua lived in my house most of the time, so I got a glimpse of the profoundness of Chinese martial arts.