Chapter 54 TECHNIQUE 48 INTEGRATING THE RIGHT SENSE INTO THE SPEECH
About 10 years ago, I had a roommate named Brenda.Brenda is a tap dance teacher, but tap dancing is more than just a livelihood for her.She was born to tap dance, and Brenda's room is covered with posters of American tap dance masters.Even moving around the house she had to tap and beat out of rhythm.It's really noisy, but every time I get her call, I don't worry about not being able to find her.
I once asked Brenda when she fell in love with tap dancing."From the moment I opened my ears," she said. Ears?I thought to myself, it's a bit mysterious.Most people say, "From the moment I opened my eyes." That's when I realized that Brenda "sees" the world not with eyes, but with ears.
Each of us sees the world through our five senses.We see, hear, touch, smell, and taste the world.So we naturally refer to the five senses when we speak.Advocates of neurolinguistics say that everyone has one of the five senses that is more acute, and Brenda is obviously the most acute of hearing.
Brenda said she grew up in an apartment in New York.The house is lower than the road.She remembered that as early as when she was learning to speak hoarsely, she would hear the sound of footsteps coming and going on the sidewalk outside.When Hui stood up, all her little ears could hear were the horns on the street, the police sirens, and the snow chains of the tires dragging across the ground.What impressed her most was the thud of the police officer riding a horse.Her first impression of the outside world is all about hearing.So to this day, sound still dominates her world.For Brenda, the tap dance teacher, her primary sense is hearing.
Neurolinguists advise us to tap into the primary senses of the person we are talking to, so Brenda and I try to incorporate hearing into my presentation as well.For example, instead of "looks" I say "sounds good".I don't say "I see what you mean", I say "I get it".Whenever I use these words, I can feel Brenda paying attention.
Once, Brenda and I were skiing with some friends.We were at a party that night, and at the party, we described to others what it was like to ski during the day: "The pistes are beautiful, and there's a lot of clarity and whiteness all around."
This man's main sense is vision, right?I tell myself.
Another added, "It's so nice to have fresh snow on your face."
Ha, his primary sense is touch, I thought again.
Then, when it was Brenda's turn, she said, "It's been a quiet day. The only thing I hear is the wind whistling in my ears as I slide down the slope." I am convinced that there must be a reason for it.
However, I still find it difficult to identify one's primary sense.
Later I found out that there is a simpler method that does not require much effort to detect other people's words and deeds, but it is equally effective.I call this technique "putting the right senses into words," and it's easy to master.Unless the other person's primary sense is obvious, just respond according to the situation at the time.Which kind of sense the other party was discussing at the time, he cooperated with it. For example, when a colleague explained the financial plan, he said: "Once this plan is implemented, our prospects for the next six months are very good." Describe, and you can respond with, "I can see what you mean" or "You really see the whole situation through."
If a co-worker says, "I seem to have a voice telling me that this plan is good," you can incorporate your visual senses as you respond: "Sounds good" or "I understand."
Possibility number three, if he says, "I feel like this project is going to work," then respond with an equally tactile expression, "I know how you feel" or "You do get the point of this question." .
When the other person speaks, which sense is mentioned?Eye?ear?Or tactile? If someone's primary sense is sight, you can incorporate visual terms into your words so that the other person feels that you see the world as they see it.If the other person's primary sense is hearing, it might be a good idea to include auditory expressions in your conversation and tell them you listen!Be clear and understand.If you are dealing with people whose sense of touch is dominant, use more words related to touch. You are telling them that you feel exactly the same as they do.
In the following technique, we need to learn how to use two words to create a sense of identity.
When the other person speaks, which sense is mentioned?Eye?ear?Or tactile? If someone's primary sense is sight, you can incorporate visual terms into your words so that the other person feels that you see the world as they see it.If the other person's primary sense is hearing, it might be a good idea to include auditory expressions in your conversation and tell them you listen!Be clear and understand.If you are dealing with people whose sense of touch is dominant, use more words related to touch. You are telling them that you feel exactly the same as they do.
In the following technique, we need to learn how to use two words to create a sense of identity.