Chapter 16 Love must be both happy and correct

It is absolutely impossible for a person to only care about what is pleasant for himself, regardless of whether it is right or not. That means that a person can do things as he pleases, regardless of whether it will cause harm to others. Such a person will become a person with a lack of morality. It may even break the law. It’s not enough to just do the right thing, and it’s not enough to just do the happy thing, so what? The answer is both correct and enjoyable!Specifically speaking, there are two: 1. There must be a degree of correctness, and try to do pleasant things within the correct range

In a love relationship, at home, without violating the law or involving morality, be less correct and leave some happy space for your lover and family.Because if you don't break the law and don't involve moral matters, you won't cause harm to others.If a lover or family member wants to steal or rob, that is something that cannot be allowed anyway. This is a big right and wrong, and we must resolutely oppose it. But if the family just forgot the keys, wanted to sleep in longer, wanted something they liked, wanted to put today's dishes until tomorrow, etc., do something that pleases you and doesn't hurt anyone else , Just try to allow it, because it will make them happier, because home is not a place to talk about "reasons", but a place to rest and relax, act coquettishly, and satisfy desires.

We have to do the right thing, but the scope of the right cannot be expanded infinitely.Things allowed by law and morality, things that do not harm other people, try not to use correctness to restrict, that is to say, within the scope of correctness, try to do some pleasant things. So, later you can try: When your lover drives the wrong way! When your lover sleeps in a little longer in the morning! When your lover finishes brushing his teeth and wants to eat again! When your lover wants to go to luxury once in a while! Can you forget about being right and make him happy? 2. Do the right thing in a pleasant way

As we said before, we can't just do pleasant things, but sometimes we have to do right things. So, can we also do the right things in a pleasant way?Isn't that both pleasant and correct? Of course you can, for example: Your lover is sick and needs medicine, but he doesn’t want to take it. It’s right to take medicine, and it’s wrong not to take medicine. Do you want to eat or not, you must eat!" This feels like an order, like forcing, and the other party will feel very uncomfortable. In fact, you can take care of the other person's happiness when emphasizing the rightness: "I know you don't want to take medicine, but how can you be better if you don't take medicine? For your health, come and eat!"

In this way, you not only emphasize the correctness, but also take care of the other person’s mood. This is both pleasant and correct, not only in love, not only at home, but in the process of dealing with people, this is the principle we must follow . for example: You are eating in a restaurant. After ordering, you find that half an hour later, the waiter still hasn’t served you a dish. You want the waiter to remind you, otherwise, if the waiter forgets to place your order, you will Waiting for nothing. At this time, you call the waiter and ask him to rush the food for you. You are doing the right thing. You are not wrong. You can say: "Waiter, what's wrong? I have been waiting for half an hour, and the food hasn't come yet." , Your service is too bad!"

You emphasized that it is correct, but the waiter may feel bad when they hear you denying them. You may say, what does it have to do with me if they are unhappy?What if you replace him with your family?They are other people's family too!Don't you need to take care of their "pleasure" when you emphasize "correctness"? Of course not, you can take care of the other person's mood when emphasizing the correctness, you can say to the waiter like this: "Waiter! I just ordered food, it has been half an hour now, and the food has not been served, please help me What's going on? Thank you!"

That's it, in love, at home, and even in various interpersonal relationships, we try our best to do the right thing in a pleasant way and take care of everyone's mood, so that when you are happy, others are also happy, everyone is like this If it is done, the whole society will be happier. Both happy and correct, in fact, you are happy and take care of other people's happiness at the same time, you belong to the type A mentioned above, and you are a person with a high ability to love. The purpose of this book is to show you exactly how you can become such a person.