Chapter 14 Chapter 5 Meeting Your True Self in the Dark

A senior American inspirational expert made up such a clichéd story that makes people want to vomit. Three people go to a company to apply for a high-paying position together.Let's call them A, B, C.These three buddies are full of ambition and determined to win.It is understandable that, as a loyal fan of capitalism, having obtained such a management position, the happy life of the middle class is not far away from them. Of course, with the limited imagination of the author, it is absolutely impossible to say that this company, like the Finance Bureau of a certain county in Fujian, ingeniously put forward the condition of "full-time undergraduate graduates from ordinary colleges and universities with foreign bachelor's degrees" in recruitment. limit.The interview is done by the boss himself, and the final decision is made.

What does this mean?It is completely implying strongly: the boss is not just a role like the boss of the company, he is also a person with personal emotions and preferences. Therefore, if you fix him based on his personal emotions and preferences, the position will also be settled. When the boss comes out, of course he won't play tricks such as throwing a piece of paper on the ground to see if the applicant picks it up, which the inspirational experts have made up and made up, and he doesn't test the applicant's sexual ability, so as to prevent them In the future, he will have a mistress, raise a mistress, or get involved with the secretary who comes and goes in and out of the boss's office wearing a suit and skirt.He is serious.However, he has a strange problem. Instead of asking a bunch of questions to test the candidates, he asks them to state what virtues and abilities they have to be qualified for the position.

According to the book, A and B are eloquently arguing in front of the boss that their academic qualifications, professional experience, intelligence, personality, etc., fully meet the job requirements. It just doesn't make sense. But C is different.At the beginning, he didn't talk about how powerful he was in terms of ability, but he lamented the history of the suffering of the children of the proletariat, especially his experience of learning by himself while working part-time in a restaurant because he had no money to go to college.He almost recited Mencius's classic inspirational essay "The heaven will send a great mission to the people, and you must first work hard..." This classic inspirational essay.Then, he changed the subject and became extremely confident, telling the boss that it was absolutely right to give him this position.

Can you imagine who got the position in the end?From the above description, you will immediately think that it is C! The author of the story wants to tell us that when the ability is difficult to compete, a person's advantageous weapon in the competition is to stimulate the emotions of the other party.He said that C had planned it long ago, and he had already inquired and heard clearly about the original experience of the boss.Naturally, C's experience and indomitable spirit made the boss see the shadow of himself back then, and had a good impression of him, so he decided to help him.And A and B are talking about things that any person may have, and it is impossible to see where their unique "self" is. In this case, how can they be impressive?

I admire this inspirational expert, who really knows how to make up stories.However, I want to correct his point of view, the boss is definitely not helping C, but helping himself! As a supplementary comparison, let me tell a real story: Back then, I had a friend who loved philosophy very much although he studied science and engineering.Today, it can be called a "folk philosopher".You can imagine, in an era where the whole people are superficial and extremely money-worshiping, how can such a person not be humiliated by the lay people?It has always been a "glorious tradition" of certain people to ridicule and besiege people with a little thought.

But these are not important.The important thing is that he joined a company and talked about philosophy without any scruples in front of his colleagues. Vanity can kill.Soon he found that the boss who once admired him began to change his face, and occasionally attacked him verbally, such as mocking him as a "philosopher".In the end, he was eliminated in the competition for the position of technical director with the most advantages. My friend didn't know how he died, and asked me for advice in frustration. After figuring out that his boss was a student of philosophy, I formally announced to him with deep sorrow: As long as you stay in this company, as long as this boss is still there, your development will be dead.You did not offend him, but your philosophy-loving self is offending the boss, which is the biggest offense!

I can guess that when his boss was studying philosophy, he must have been fanatical and looked at the real world with the kind of thinking and values ​​in philosophy.However, it quickly stumbled.Therefore, in order to climb up, he must believe in the pursuit of interests (as if people also call it "philosophy"), and completely deny that "philosophy" self, calling it "stupid" as the qualification for interest competition. After many years, when my friend appeared in a "philosophical" appearance, it was tantamount to the resurrection of the old boss.The boss recognized the old self from my friend at a glance, just like in the story made up by the inspirational expert, the interviewing boss recognized the old self from C!

However, C can use this to enter the brave new world of the middle class, while my friend is totally looking for death. Why? The reason is that when my friend's boss killed his old self for profit, he would feel guilty.In order to get rid of this sense of guilt, he must hate his own self in the past, so as to convince himself psychologically that this choice is correct.But at the same time, psychologically, since benefits can only be obtained by killing the self of the year, the resurrection of "him" is always a nightmare threat to his interests, and he is very afraid of "him".

His psychological logic is: If there is a past self, there is no today!As soon as I push it, it becomes psychologically: If my past self still interferes with me, everything I am today will be threatened! So, my friend will have no way out.In the workplace, hiding your true self is a form of self-protection, because the workplace is just a role relationship and has nothing to do with personality.Sadly, he didn't. The reason why C was hired by the boss is that the boss did not forget and deny the suffering self; on the contrary, he regarded the original self as a precious part of himself.Helping C is to "give thanks" to myself back then.His psychological logic is: Without the past self, there would be no today.

To get help from someone with certain power or resources, it is very important to find out his past self and his attitude towards this current self!In addition to the two extremes of my friend's boss and C's boss, there is another kind of person who is in the middle and needs to be carefully identified. This kind of person was also good at the time, for example, he had an idealistic temperament, loved literature, loved philosophy, and so on.However, for the sake of survival and development, they don't seem to play or talk about these things.However, they did not deny the self of the year, but just hid and concealed that self so that outsiders could not see it, and postponed the ideal infinitely.Deep in their hearts, they just left regrets and self-blame for not being able to persist.

what does this mean?It means that if you let him see the shadow of that year, he will definitely help you!Because they didn't kill their old selves, your presence won't threaten them.On the contrary, their self-blame and regret have always needed to be compensated and eliminated.And your appearance just made them find a substitute.By helping you, they are helping themselves psychologically too! What is a nobleman? C's boss and the above-mentioned people are noble people! I also want to decipher the following phenomena for you. There are some "successful people" who never shy away from talking about their poverty and shabbiness in front of "fans" (note, not in front of his officials and rich friends!), such as drooling over a piece of cake but having no money to buy it, a pair of Broken shoes last for a few years.Like the revolutionary leader Comrade Li Zicheng, it is simply the greatest extravagant wish to have a delicious meal. The reason for doing this is that it is no longer a shame to say that they once lived a life that was not as good as a cow or a horse. They now have an awesome "self" to support them; Now that Niu Cha is a moral halo created by his ability! His subtext is: you worship me! If in the face of such a "successful person", you also use that suffering self to get close to him, you are just waiting to be despised.He is different from C's boss and my friend's boss. He no longer has any feelings for the poor boy back then, neither love nor hate!When he talked about the poor boy back then, he distanced himself psychologically, as if he was talking about a stranger. That poor boy was just a prop he used to show off his current self! If this kind of person has not yet started to succeed, or when he has succeeded but appears to lack "legitimacy", he will never mention his suffering or shameless self, and he hates others to mention it the most.All he has to do is to completely forget about his past self, as if he was born a dragon.If you know his past and insist on bringing it up without knowing the time, then you are dead. Psychologically, you are coercing him, threatening everything he has now, the consequences of this can be imagined! A poor friend of Chen Sheng, a famous proletarian revolutionist and leader of the Daze Township Uprising, can serve as a mirror. Back then, people who were brutally oppressed by the Qin imperialism and who had no sense of revolution laughed at Comrade Chen Sheng's great ambition.In order to unite the revolutionary masses to take the road of armed struggle, Comrade Chen Sheng also made a revolutionary promise, saying: "If you are rich and noble, don't forget each other." There is no evidence to show that after the establishment of the Zhang Chu Soviet regime (Da Chu, "Da Chu Xing, King Chen Sheng"), Comrade Chen Sheng, as the chairman, turned his face on the poor buddies who used to be "servants" to work hard with him.When a poor man comes to his door, even if he can't be the director or section chief, he can be an ordinary civil servant.The problem is that that buddy really disrespects Comrade Chen Sheng.God only saves those who save themselves.If a person is too stupid, no one can save him. He first called Chen Sheng by his first name "She" in public.How can this work?As I said earlier, the boss of the unit where I used to work insisted that we call him "X Secretary", but of course we don't have to, if we want to kill ourselves.Comrade Chen Sheng is no longer the poor boy he was back then, but the chairman of the revolutionary regime. After changing his status, he has acquired a new "self", and others have to identify with him according to this new "self". The name will be changed.Calling him by his first name, where does Comrade Chen Sheng's authority as the chairman of the revolutionary regime lie? Many years ago, I found an embarrassing thing: There is an office director in our unit. As an old employee, everyone is used to calling him "Director Liu". It is said that "Director Liu" is not only related to the position, but also to a specific person. But then he became deputy director.Here comes the problem, instead of being called "Director Liu", it should be called "Director Liu".But many people continued to call "Director Liu" for a short period of time before they felt awkward.Because it is easy to change the name, but it is not so easy to adapt to the "change" that a person uses his name to symbolize his identity.Fortunately, Director Liu, oh, no, Director Liu, my lord has a lot, so I don't care about it. Of course, Comrade Chen Sheng also has a broad revolutionary mind, so he endured it.Thinking about it on the bright side, isn’t it because this poor guy treats himself as a buddy too much, and he still acts so kindly now; thinking about it at the worst, it’s nothing more than a gimmick, the poor guy wants to blackmail me in front of me Me: I hold your secret, and with a shake of my hand, I can reveal the past you most want to forget!Raise your worth in front of my "horse boy", I and your boss were brothers back then! Unexpectedly, this poor man is really shameless.For the sake of being proletarian brothers together, when Comrade Chen Sheng entertained him with good wine and meat in a luxury hotel, he didn't know whether it was because he was used to living in a dilapidated house or because he had mental problems. Extravagance.This is too much, and it is simply saying that Comrade Chen Sheng cannot withstand the temptation of the decadent bourgeois way of life, and has lost his true qualities as a proletarian revolutionary. Think about it, when you entertain a so-called friend in a restaurant with good intentions, and he wipes his mouth after eating and drinking, and then puts on a straight face to teach you that you should spend less money and say that your attitude towards life is problematic. Do you want to smack a guy who is cheap and good-looking, who doesn't understand the world at all? But Comrade Chen Sheng endured it. Unexpectedly, this poor man has grown up and made an inch, and he wants to reminisce with Comrade Chen Sheng, telling the tragic story of everyone working together for the landlord class.What is he going to do?In a society that pays attention to honor and inferiority, and pays attention to family background in obtaining political power, this is not the same as exposing that Comrade Chen Sheng is not qualified to be the chairman of the Zhang Chu Soviet Republic! Before launching the Daze Township Uprising, why did Comrade Chen Sheng and his loyal comrade-in-arms Wu Guang act out a play of "the scorpion in the belly of the fish, the sound of the fox on the bonfire"?It is to give the revolution a kind of legitimacy of providence.Without inviting God to help, and believing that God is on our side, how can the people have the courage to rise up against Qin imperialism, which is armed to the teeth?If it wasn't for God's will and arrangement, how could a "poor N generation" like Chen Sheng have the qualifications to be called king or emperor? Therefore, in the history of our country, one of the things that some people had to consider after they became emperors was to make up a fairy tale to prove that they were different from ordinary people, and that they were born with magical abnormalities, such as abnormal celestial phenomena, the appearance of dragons, and These mysterious things are related, and it is by no means a mortal body like everyone else (his son doesn't need to waste brain cells to make up again, because he is already a "dragon species").For example, Comrade Liu Bang directed people to make up a story, saying that his mother was resting by the lake one day, and suddenly a dragon fell from the sky, and his mother was pregnant with him, thus implying that he was a "dragon boy".Of course, this also means that his father has been wearing a cuckold and has been helping others raise their sons. Unfortunately, there was no DNA testing back then.It's really hard for his father to do this for a man. Brother Bang has already got the country, so he can't take the packaging background lightly, let alone Comrade Chen Sheng who only established a small revolutionary base?Poor buddies exposing their old background like this is tantamount to taking a salary from Comrade Chen Sheng, subverting the legitimacy of Comrade Chen Sheng as the chairman, what is it if it is not courting death?