Chapter 15 Chapter 14 Forms of Breakup Forms of Breakups

People say: "Meeting is the beginning of parting", and this is true.Where there is a meeting, there will be a parting.Since to love others, then "parting" has become an inevitable fate.Of course, no one will be ready to part from the beginning of loving each other.At the beginning of falling in love, people expect their love to last forever, but as time goes by, at some point, the idea of ​​parting will come between two people. Regarding parting, most people think: "Since we must leave, we must leave cleanly and beautifully." However, the word "leave beautifully" sounds easy, but it is a bit exaggerated and unbelievable.Especially for men and women who have a close sexual relationship and truly love each other, their parting is definitely not something that can be done hastily with some pretty words.Maybe there will be emotional entanglements or unpleasant quarrels between them.

If it is really possible to "leave beautifully", then it can only happen in the following situations: the relationship between the two is not deep, and love has not reached a certain level; or both men and women are tired of each other at the same time and want to break up.Especially when two people have other people, the rate of breaking up easily is higher. However, there are very few cases where both parties are tired of each other at the same time. In most cases, one party wants to break up, but the other party is reluctant to leave. It can be seen that under normal circumstances, when parting, a man and a woman are like competing on a delicate rope. As long as one party is strongly attached to the other, then they cannot break up smoothly.Even if it is possible to leave in the end, many troubles are bound to occur, and sometimes fierce battles will even break out repeatedly.

Therefore, "leaving beautifully" is nothing more than an illusion, because both parties will naturally reveal their selfish and ugly faces at the time of parting. All in all, parting consumes a lot of energy while being sad and difficult, so don't try parting unless you have to. However, since we are going to love and get to know others, we will inevitably have to deal with breaking up.Therefore, how to overcome this dangerous obstacle has become a major issue that affects people's life. When it comes to breaking up, the way people come to terms with it varies by age, and the reasons for breaking up vary.

For example, young people between the ages of fifteen and twenty, whether male or female, have no awareness of marriage, so they simply decide to associate with or separate from others based on their likes and dislikes.In this sense, they have a lot of room for choice and more opportunities to contact each other. At the same time, their separation rate is also high.That is to say, because they don't have to bear social responsibilities and burdens with whom they associate with at the moment, they can choose freely as they like. However, when a person reaches the age when he or she realizes that it is time to get married, even though he or she likes the other party, he or she has to break up because he (she) is not suitable as a marriage partner, and the situation of the two parties breaking up is more complicated.Because married men have families and are inextricably linked to society, their reasons for leaving are different from those of single men.

Nevertheless, men of different ages have a common and unique parting psychology.Moreover, the way they act when parting is completely different from that of women. First of all, men are lonely and cowardly creatures who don't want to be alone.Because they are not used to doing housework since they were young, and when they grow up, they suddenly become a person, and life will be extremely inconvenient. For this reason, they are unwilling to leave. Secondly, because men have strong sexual desires when they are young, once they lose a woman who maintains a stable relationship, it will be a fatal blow to them.Therefore, even if there is no relationship with the current woman, as long as they do not find the next lover, they will not make up their minds to break up.This is a behavior pattern unique to men.Even if the love is gone or has long been indifferent, they will often court without caring.

If a man proposes to break up, first of all he must have another woman. In this regard, women are very different from men.When the personality is not compatible or the other person is disgusted, even if there is no other man in her heart, the woman will consider breaking up in advance. In addition, once a woman decides to break up, she will tell the man very clearly and explain the reasons for breaking up in detail.Men, by contrast, tend to be ambiguous, and they rarely use straightforward language like "I hate you." The reason is: men subconsciously believe that "women should not say too much" and "should protect women", etc.; in addition, men are inherently indecisive, so they tend to take an uncertain attitude.

In this way, women may not notice the real intentions of men and often misunderstand. When a man intends to break up, the first performance is to reduce the number of phone calls and dates.At this time, if the woman asks him: "Why don't you call often recently?" Then he will reply "I am very busy at work", or find some other reasons to prevaricate.There are indeed many women who believe it to be true.No matter how busy you are, you can't even make a phone call.In fact, they were diligent in contact at the beginning of their relationship, and they would find time to meet the woman no matter what.Therefore, it is simply unreasonable to use busy work as an excuse.

A lack of warmth is also one of the signs of an impending breakup.For example, in the past, when the woman asked "I want to go somewhere", the man would readily agree. However, when he wanted to break up, he turned a deaf ear to it.However, what is easy to get wrong in this respect is: because the two parties are too close to each other, there is a sense of peace of mind, and this sense of peace of mind can make the two parties do not need to pay attention to each other deliberately to achieve a harmonious relationship. At this time, the man will also neglect the woman.However, this "negligence" is specious with the aforementioned negligence.

The above two signals can be said to be yellow signals sent by men to prepare to break up.Once this stage is reached, whether there is a possibility of recovery depends on the attitude of the woman. However, if the man belittles himself and says words such as "I am an irresponsible person, I am not worthy of a well-behaved woman like you" or "I am not the man you imagined", then this is equivalent to He is implying: "I can't be with you anymore", which is close to the red signal.Because the similar lines in the man's style can be understood as "I hate you already".Once the situation has evolved to this extent, I am afraid it will be difficult for him to change his mind.

A woman who doesn't know what she really means replies, "No, you're a good man," and the man thinks, "What a sluggish woman." In short, at this stage, men make almost no excuses for women.For example, even if he is pressed by his own woman: "Have you dated other women?" He will not refute.Or just say angrily, "Damn it!" or put on a face-to-face look and say, "Think what you want." That's a pretty serious red flag. However, even if it develops to this point, most men will not say "break up" in person.If the woman says: "You are such a heartless man." Then he will be more likely to make mistakes and say: "You are right, I am that kind of person."

The purpose of expressing the intention of breaking up in this ambiguous language is not to cause a blow to the woman, which is also the gentle side of men, but if viewed from the negative side, then their intention is not to make themselves a villain, and they do not want to bear the charge of abandoning others .It cannot but be said that this is the cunning of men. In this case, most men hope that they can be hated by women.They are unwilling to speak decisive words themselves, but wait for the other party to say: "There is no longer a heartless person like you." From this point of view, a man is a pretentious and extremely cunning animal.However, if you look at it from another angle, they are reluctant to even say harsh words in order not to hurt each other.It can be seen that they are cowardly animals. So, if the relationship has broken down to such an extent, can the man return to the woman?In fact, this possibility is not impossible, and this is also a strange thing about men. The relationship between men and women is not either-or, they often communicate with multiple women at the same time, the purpose is to facilitate mutual comparison. For example, when interacting with woman A, woman B appeared again.At this time, if he likes girl B, he will empathize with her, walk away from girl A, and reduce the number of times he meets her. However, he doesn't exactly want to break up with Woman A.Although the chances of meeting have been reduced naturally, but I still want to meet woman A occasionally.Although 80% of the feelings have been transferred, but still 20% of the attachment to woman A is hard to let go.Therefore, if time and economic conditions allow, although most of his emotions are used on woman B, he still wants to have a proper relationship with woman A.At this time, if female C appeared again, he might date these three people at the same time.Moreover, in the process of interacting with woman B, if he finds that woman A is still good, he will return to woman A. Similarly, if things go wrong with woman C, he may return to woman A again.That's it, there are quite a few men who skillfully deal with several women. This situation can be called "two boats with one foot" or "three boats with one foot".Men are prone to this course of action whenever conditions permit.The reason for this is that on the one hand, a man is hard to let go of the woman in front of him, and on the other hand, he does not feel that he should feel guilty about dealing with multiple women. There are also women who date several men at the same time, but most women break up with their ex once they have a new boyfriend.Perhaps it can be said that this is the difference between women and men. All in all, if you say that women are aboveboard at best, and at worst they are too cruel, they will say "I don't want to see you anymore", "I will never love you again" and so on when breaking up. mean words. However, even if a man empathizes with another, he will still be reluctant to part with his ex-girlfriend. As long as there is no special reason, he will not open his mouth to hurt others. Because even if a man falls in love with someone else, he will not completely forget the old person, so if the situation changes, he is very likely to return to the old lover.Therefore, as far as the woman is concerned, even if she realizes that the man seems to have loved someone else recently, as long as he is not the one you want to lose, instead of getting angry and despairing early, it is better to think of ways to repair the relationship. It is a pity that most women cannot bear it during the man's transference.They blame each other, sometimes sneering at each other out of jealousy.Doing so will end the relationship between the two parties as soon as possible. Women often say: "He must have regarded my love as a burden." In fact, when men want to break up, it is rarely because of a simple burden.The reason why I say this is because even if men feel a little burden from a woman’s love, they will think that it is the expression of the other person’s deep love for themselves and wholeheartedly for themselves, so they don’t feel heavy.If the other party's feelings are too intense, the man will feel a little depressed and unhappy, but when he thinks that she has done her best for herself, she feels embarrassed to reject people thousands of miles away for no reason.The same is true for women in this regard. When a man devotes his love to her wholeheartedly, she will also feel: "He treats me so well, how can I..." Then her heart will soften all of a sudden. If a woman wants to end the relationship, any man who is not too obtuse will feel it very quickly.Because women are very honest about love and love, if they want to break up in their hearts, they will clearly express it in words and deeds.Women's love is not ambiguous.In contrast, the man's character appears extremely ambiguous and perfunctory. When the woman starts to lose her mind, the man will panic and try to make her change her mind.If she is in a lost stage, we can leave it alone, but once she has made up her mind, the man cannot keep her. However, men always like to judge others by themselves, thinking that even if the woman leaves him, there is a possibility of returning.But for this kind of sake, if the man is still reluctant, then he may be robbed by the woman, such as "thick-skinned", "shameless", etc., but will be even more alienated. In this way, by observing men and women through the phenomenon of "separation", we can discover the differences in the understanding of love between men and women.When the fire of love is ignited, women's emotions fluctuate violently; and when they decide to break up, they will leave resolutely.On the contrary, men are not as emotional as women, but generally they can maintain a permanent love and are reluctant to part with each other.That is, compared with the decisive and resolute character traits of women, men's characters appear extremely sticky and cowardly. All in all, a breakup can be very nerve-wracking.But we can't just see it as a sad thing, a bad thing.It is true that going through a breakup is painful. Not only do you get hurt, but you also often expose your ugly side and make yourself regret it for a long time. However, it is never a bad thing for a man and a woman to meet and fall in love, even if they will eventually break up.They bump into each other and fight not only to deepen their knowledge of being human, but at the same time they will learn more about themselves.In addition, compared with those who have not experienced love and parting, those who have experienced this kind of experience have richer life memories, and they can seize more opportunities to develop valuable insights into the subtleties of people's hearts and life. Observation. But love does not bring only favors.Some people will also be hurt, lost, world-weary, and out of tune with the world because of love.However, all of these vary from case to case and from person to person, and it is impossible to generalize which one is good and which is bad. The only thing worth mentioning in this regard is: Even if you are unfortunately injured, you must get back up again. Because Japanese parents expect their children to grow up safely, most Japanese mothers prevent their children from experiencing harmful love affairs and do not allow their children to do anything wrong.Of course, their thinking is out of concern for the well-being of the child, but I always feel that is too narrow. With the wisdom to stand up again after being hurt, being hurt itself can become a treasure in life.Moreover, through the tempering of time, breaking up will definitely add luster to his (her) life and make his (her) life more rich and fragrant.If meeting is the beginning of parting, then parting will be the starting point of seeking a new self.I sincerely hope that you can take a more positive attitude and seize the bright future.