Chapter 146 Be neutral and unreliable in doing things

"Neutral and not leaning" comes from "Book of Rites: The Doctrine of the Mean": "So a gentleman is harmonious but not aloof, it is strong to correct; neutral and not leaning, it is strong to correct." It means being neutral and unbiased.Maintaining neutrality here does not mean ignoring anyone or offending anyone, but acting in accordance with principles, using principles as standards, and being impartial, impartial, and impartial. To be neutral and unreliable is to ask people to stick to principles in major matters.On some minor details, it doesn't matter whether you are neutral or not, as long as you deal with it flexibly according to the general human experience and sophistication.for example:

Lu Duan is the prime minister of Song Taizong Zhao Guangyi, and he usually doesn't like to show off.Some relatives of the emperor and ministers close to him asked him to do some private affairs, but he usually turned a blind eye and closed his eyes, so that he got a reputation of "confused".But Taizong trusted him and made him Kou Zhun's deputy. Later, Emperor Taizong died, and before his death, he made his third son Zhao Heng the crown prince.The eunuch Wang Ji'en was afraid that Zhao Heng's succession would be disadvantageous to him, so he plotted to make Taizong's eldest son, King Zhao Yuanzuo of Chu, the crown prince, and the queen agreed.After Taizong's death, the queen ordered Wang Ji'en to call Lu Duan into the palace to discuss matters.

Lu Duan had a premonition that there was going to be a big change, so he first ordered people to lock Wang Ji'en in his residence, asked soldiers to guard the door, and then rushed into the palace to meet the queen.The queen said to Lu Duan: "The emperor has passed away. It is said that the eldest son should be established for an heir. What do you think should be done now?" Lu Duan knew what the queen meant, but he didn't back down, saying: "The first emperor established the crown prince just for today, and now the late emperor has just passed away, so how can we discuss the matter of re-establishing the crown prince?" The queen had nothing to say.

When the crown prince Zhao Heng held the enthronement ceremony, there was a curtain between the new emperor and the officials.Not only did Lu Duan not bow down, but he went to the steps and rolled up the curtain to confirm that the new emperor was indeed Zhao Heng. Then he came down, led his officials to bow down, and shouted "Long live". Lu Duan gets along with the emperor's relatives and relatives, and turns a blind eye to matters that do not harm principles and national interests. He looks like a "foolish person" who has no opinions and principles, and has achieved "harmony without flow"—— To put it bluntly, it means maintaining a superficially normal relationship with the other party, but not collaborating with the other party, and maintaining a communicative state of "face and heart disharmony" with the other party.Doing so will not offend anyone, thus protecting yourself.On matters related to national interests, such as the establishment of a prince, he did not join hands with Wang Jien and the queen, but insisted on the former emperor's proposition and confronted the queen tit for tat.The Queen's intentions are naturally untenable in the face of the principles of right and wrong, and in the end they can only act according to the principles of Song Taizong and Lu Duan.

In this, on the one hand, Lu Duan insisted on the principle of "neutrality and unreliability".This is the fundamental premise for him to defeat the Queen's side.On the other hand, in action, Lu Duan also used keen, smart and cautious means to protect himself, ensuring the smooth realization of his "neutrality and not relying on" principle: When Wang Jien was ordered by the queen to find Lu Duan , Lu Duan was keenly aware that "something big happened", so he put Wang Jien under house arrest.In this way, it not only prevented Wang Jien from reporting to the queen, so that the queen took extraordinary measures to eliminate the unfavorable situation of Lu Duan's side; Cleared a big hurdle.

When the prince succeeded to the throne, Lu Duan cautiously did not bow down as a courtesy of a minister, but lifted the curtain first to confirm that the crown prince was the crown prince, and then bowed down.This plot, which seems to be full of comedy, actually fully demonstrates Lu Duan's tough attitude of "sticking to the principle to the end"-he can only rest assured that the facts he has seen with his own eyes are consistent with the principle. Lu Duan adhered to the principle of fairness in the face of big right and wrong, and did not join forces with small groups of vested interests. From a large perspective, he preserved the interests of formal organizations and grasped the direction of history.

At the critical moment when the new emperor came to the throne, Lu Duan was assertive and courageous, and he was not overwhelmed by power and influence, and maintained a smooth transfer of power. This is the real "neutral and unreliable", and this is the real strong . When we deal with things, we must also pay attention to being "neutral and unreliable".It is inevitable that there will be interest groups in the company. If the interests of small groups hurt the overall interests of the company, we must pay attention to being "neutral and unreliable" in a timely manner.

When we encounter conflicts in interpersonal communication, we can also use "neutrality and unreliability" to resolve them. When two friends argue, you have to decide. If you avoid it, you will offend both of them at the same time.So how to do it effectively when persuading a fight?There are three principles: One is not to blindly persuade a fight.If you don't talk about the point, not only will it be ineffective, but it will also arouse the resentment of the parties involved.It is necessary to find out the situation in as much detail as possible from the front and the side, and strive to speak the words of persuasion to the hearts of the parties concerned.

The second is to distinguish between primary and secondary.There is a difference between the primary and secondary parties in the quarrel, and the power should not be used equally to persuade the quarrel. The party who speaks fiercely and quarrels too much should focus on the work, so that it is easier to settle the dispute. The third is to be objective and fair.When persuading a fight, one must distinguish right from wrong, and cannot "make peace" unprincipled.It is not convincing to criticize both sides in general without distinguishing between right and wrong.Adhere to the principle of "right and wrong" and use "principles" to speak. Whoever commits a principled issue or is unreasonable is wrong.

Of course, when persuading a fight, one should be careful not to be overly aggressive in tone.Because you persuaded the fight based on the principle that peace is the most important thing, not to provoke fire.