Chapter 94 If you don't flatter, you can talk

As the saying goes: "Thousands of clothes, ten thousand clothes, flattery but not clothes." People always like to hear flattery from others.Sometimes, even if you know that the other party is speaking flattery, you will still feel complacent in your heart. This is the weakness of human nature.When a person is praised by others, he will never feel disgusted, unless the other party's words are too outrageous.It can be seen that speaking flattery is an essential skill in human communication.Flattery spoken well will make you likable and help you achieve your stated goals. The first condition for flattering others is to have a sincere and serious attitude.Words will reflect a person's psychology, so inadvertent or careless speech can easily be seen through by the other party, resulting in unpleasant feelings.When flattering others, you can't say something that is far from the truth.For example, how would you feel if you saw a child with a blank expression and said to his mother, "Your baby looks smart!"What was meant to be flattery turned into a great irony, which had the opposite effect.It will be better if you say, "Oh! Your little one is really tall."

Therefore, you must be honest when flattering others. In this way, the flattery you say will become a real compliment to others, and the other party will listen to it and feel naturally different from hearing ordinary flattery. A city cultural company wants to build a movie theater.On this day, manager Wang of the company was working, and manager Li from the furniture company came to sell the chairs. "Hey! It's magnificent. I've never seen such a beautiful office. If I have such an office, my life's wish will be fulfilled." Manager Li started his conversation in this way.He touched the armrest of the office chair with his hand: "Isn't this Xiangshan mahogany? It's a rare and high-quality wood!"

"Really?" Manager Wang's pride welled up.He said: "The whole office was decorated by a decoration manufacturer in Shenzhen." After that, he took Manager Li to visit the whole office without showing off, and introduced design proportions, decoration materials, color matching, etc. with great enthusiasm, and his excitement was beyond words. . Needless to say, Manager Li successfully obtained the seat order contract signed by Manager Wang.The manager's "love of beauty" has been satisfied, and he will naturally give Manager Wang a kind of satisfaction. Everyone in the world likes compliments, but compliments should be based on each person's characteristics, in different ways, and with different content.As for a businessman, if you say that he is talented, smart, flexible, and has a good way of making money, his face is flushed now, and he is bound to make a fortune soon, he must be happy to hear that.Manager Li grasped the mentality of the businessman and signed the contract smoothly.

Saying flattery will vary from person to person, and several factors must be considered: One is the state of mind of the listener.As the saying goes: "Don't ask questions about prosperity at the beginning, you can tell by looking at the face." When complimenting others, you must learn to observe the words and expressions.A young man who sleeps and forgets food and sleep for his career can be called "career-oriented and self-motivated"; but for an entrepreneur who is struggling with debts and restless, if you praise him as "successful in his career and proud of his spring breeze", the other party may say If you think you are talking "sarcasm", this kind of flattery will have the opposite effect.

The second is the cognitive level of the listener.The level of cultural knowledge is different, and the ability to accept the language is different.For example, praise him for his excellence.For an old expert who specializes in classical literature and has made outstanding achievements, you can quote the classics in a more polite manner; for a car repairer, if you say that he repairs cars well, you can give him a thumbs up and say something honest. "Awesome" instead of showing off your eloquence and saying he's "unprecedented or future".If he doesn't understand, I'm afraid it will cause a misunderstanding, thinking that you cursed him to kill off his children and grandchildren.

The third is the personality and character of the listener.The other party is extroverted and transparent, you can praise him more, and he will accept it naturally; if the other party is more introverted, sensitive, and serious, if you praise him too much, he will think you are frivolous and superficial.Therefore, pay attention to this when complimenting the other party. The fourth is the psychological appeal of the listener.Both parties in the conversation have their own desires, and they should speak words of praise to meet the needs of the other party.A girl who doesn't like a lady-like type, has a distinctive personality and is full of boyishness, if you praise her for being graceful, charming, gentle and demure, she may not appreciate you, and may even blame you for being "eyeless".If you understand her psychology and praise that her short hair looks energetic and energetic, she will be happy.