Chapter 56 courteous relatives

How to get along with relatives?Here are the following aspects. As the saying goes, "If you don't go, don't get close, go often and renew", what it means is that relatives need to move around frequently, you come and go, and frequent exchanges can deepen the emotional close relationship.Communication among relatives is important not only because it helps the development of personal connections, but also because it is an important symbol of cohesion among relatives.We advocate more communication, and it does not mean that the more "stopping" the better.The pace of life in modern society has accelerated, and each other's life and work are very tense. Frequent walking will cause a great burden to both parties, so the frequency of communication should be appropriate and the communication methods should be diverse.In addition to visiting and talking, you can also go on some outings and participate in some recreational activities together. These are of great benefit to enriching spare time life, relaxing each other's body and mind and strengthening mutual relationship.

In the communication between relatives, the frequency of etiquette entertainment is relatively high, such as the joy of wedding, birthday and housewarming, etc., there must always be something expressed to show congratulations, which is human nature.Gifts are the carrier of emotions, but gifts are not omnipotent, and the communication between relatives is the exchange of emotions after all. Reciprocity in interpersonal science is not equivalent exchange in economics.If relatives are happy to congratulate or are sick, it is appropriate to bring some gifts to visit, but pay attention to the issue of "degree".The ancients had a saying that "goose feathers are sent thousands of miles away, and friendship is more important than gifts", as long as you can express your feelings of congratulations or comfort.If each other entertains too much and is too heavy in terms of etiquette, it will not only increase each other's family expenses, but also make people feel vulgar, thereby diluting interpersonal relationships.Therefore, in the relationship between relatives, we should advocate the communication method of "the friendship between gentlemen is as light as water", pay attention to emotional communication, and overcome the vulgar ideology of "the thicker the gift, the deeper the relationship".

There are several situations for asking relatives and friends to solve problems: one is to ask relatives and friends to help with things that violate rules and disciplines; The reason is that since it is a relationship between relatives and friends, you should run for me. Help between relatives and friends should be, but helping people has always been mutual.The ancient Greek statesman Perik said: "The way I make friends is to give benefits to others, not to get benefits from them." This principle should be followed in communication between relatives and friends.It is extremely selfish to only care about oneself and ignore others, even putting relatives and friends in an illegal situation.Between relatives and friends, one party should consider the difficulties of the other party, and the other party should also understand the difficulties of the other party, and those who should help or can help should actively and enthusiastically help the other party.But we should pay attention to the principles in "favor exchange", that is, we can't use principles to make favor transactions.Instead, we should remain rational and insist on a clear distinction between public and private.