Chapter 26 look at the eyes

"The eyes are the seedlings of the heart".The eyes are the windows of the soul.People can control their own language at will, and they can duplicity completely in order to temporarily adapt to the requirements of a specific situation, but it is difficult for people to control their own eyes at will.A person with keen observation ability can see the real state of a person's heart from his gaze; he can tell from a person's eyes whether he is really calm or composed, or he is pretending to be calm but his heart is flustered. Scientific research has revealed that people's pupils do not dilate in response to disgusting stimuli, but contract significantly.When people's mood changes from pleasant to unpleasant, the pupils will involuntarily narrow, accompanied by squinting and frowning to varying degrees.It can be seen that the eyes of a person are the display of their inner emotional state.

In interpersonal communication, eye contact plays an important role in information transmission.Different gazes reflect different psychology and produce different psychological effects.Such as the following manifestations: People who suddenly look away once being stared at by others are mostly inferior and feel dwarfed by comparison; people who cannot focus their eyes on the other party and quickly withdraw their eyes are mostly introverted and not sociable. When listening to someone's speech, one side nods, but does not focus on the talker, indicating that he is not interested in the person and the topic.Focusing your gaze on the other person's eyes and face when speaking is a sign of sincere listening, respect and understanding.

Only paying attention to the things in one's own hands, not looking at what the other person is saying, is an expression of negligence, indifference, and absent-mindedness. Looking up at each other means respect and trust; looking down at others means intentionally maintaining one's own dignity. Looking at each other with a smile is harmonious understanding; looking at others with a frown is worry and sympathy. A squint with a blank face is a kind of contempt; a smile that suddenly pulls the corners of the mouth after seeing the other party is a kind of sarcasm; . Two people who have good feelings for each other will look into each other's eyes when speaking to show that they understand the meaning; when people who are not speculative meet, they generally try to avoid looking into each other's eyes to eliminate unhappiness.

Some people like to wear sunglasses in communication, and they don't take off the glasses even indoors or in the shadows, because he doesn't want others to discover his secrets from his eyes.However, interacting with people wearing dark glasses and not making equal eye contact can create some separation and displeasure. The way people's eyes move also reflects people's state of mind.It is generally believed that people who stare intently at the other party's conversation are more honest, but they do not necessarily stare at it from beginning to end. Conversely, what about the averted gaze?When meeting for the first time, the person who looks away first has a more active personality.In addition, in the conversation, judging whether a person can have the upper hand can be decided in the first 30 seconds.When eye contact occurs, the first person to look away is the winner.On the contrary, people who are worried because the other party looks away may think wildly, thinking that the other party dislikes them. Therefore, they unconsciously care about the other party's line of sight, and in the end they are completely restrained by the other party.

Because of this, special care should be taken with challenging partners who don't focus on talking to you when they first meet.However, it is also an act of looking away. If you look away when someone is paying attention, that's another matter. In communication activities, by observing the direction of people's line of sight, we can also see through people's mentality.If you are facing the opposite sex, people who just take a look and then deliberately look away are mostly because they have a strong interest in the opposite sex.For example, on a train or a bus, when a young and beautiful woman comes up, everyone's eyes will almost be focused on her, but young men often turn their faces away quickly.Although they are also very interested, but based on a strong self-control psychology, they have suppressed behavior.If the desire for interest increases, it will use squint to peek.This is because you want to see the other party clearly, but you don't want the other party to know your own thoughts.

In communication activities, the position of the eyes is different, and the state of mind is also very different.For example, when the superior discusses work with the subordinate, the superior's line of sight will definitely be sent from a high place, and will naturally be projected directly down.On the contrary, as a subordinate, although he has not done anything wrong, his eyes are often from the bottom up, and he often appears weak.This is because people with high positions always want to maintain their majesty to their subordinates.But there are exceptions, which have nothing to do with the position, but personality reasons.Generally speaking, introverts tend to look away when interacting.