Chapter 2 Chapter 1 Eight Principles of Good Eloquence

Carnegie's advice: If an adult can change his mind, he can change his character. In the early 20th century, psychologists and philosophers asserted that the average person uses only a tiny fraction of his or her full potential.We are only half awake compared to who we should be; our enthusiasm is dampened, our blueprints are not unfolded, and we use only a tiny fraction of our mind and body resources.What is the reason for this?In fact, this is the psychology of fear.People's fear is terrible, so I often say to my students: "You have to assume that the audience owes you money and are begging you for a few more days; but you are the proud creditor, so there is no need to be afraid. them."

In 1912, the giant ship "Titanic" sank in the ice of the North Atlantic.That was the year I started teaching public speaking, and I was tasked with teaching a "public speaking" class for the New York YMCA evening classes.That experience was very valuable to me, because it allowed me to accumulate a wealth of knowledge about speaking and contributed to the birth of my eloquence training class. While teaching classes for the business community and professionals in New York, I have come to understand that students not only need to be trained in speech, but also have an urgent need to master the art of communicating with people in everyday business and social situations.Because in addition to longing for health, what people need most is to improve interpersonal relationships and learn the art of dealing with others, and all of these are based on the premise and means of speaking.Therefore, I decided to conduct in-depth research in this area, and finally concluded a set of comprehensive and practical courses, which is very meaningful. The proverb "Silence is golden" should be re-evaluated with the changes of the times, because how to use the charm of language determines whether modern people can succeed in communication.

The subconscious refusal to communicate with others or the fear of speaking in public is not unique to one individual. Most people are like this, but to varying degrees.In addition to the members of the training class, I have also conducted surveys on college students. 80% to 90% of the students have experienced the fear of not speaking in public and the fear of communicating with others. This seems to be saying that "fear communication" is inherent in human beings.Indeed, it is an inherent weakness of human beings, and it has a lot to do with human personality.Psychologists believe that personality is a basic characteristic of a person's behavior that is relatively stable.Personality is stable, that is to say, after a person's personality is formed under the influence of a certain education and environment, it is difficult to change, so there is a saying that "the country is easy to change, but the nature is hard to change".

Relevant experts have conducted observational research on a pair of college student twin sisters in Arizona.The twin sisters are similar in appearance, have the same innate genetic qualities, and their family life and education are also the same.Although the two sisters have been educated in the same elementary school, middle school and university, despite the same genetics, education and environment, the two sisters have very different personalities: the older sister is good at speaking and communication, confident and proactive, decisive and brave; On the contrary, the younger sister lacks a sense of independence and always follows her sister when she speaks and does things.When relevant experts talk to them, the elder sister always answers first, while the younger sister just agrees, not talking, or just making some supplements.In short, the two sisters have completely different personalities.

Why is this?It turned out that the parents identified one of them as the elder sister and the other as the younger sister. Since they were young, they told the elder sister to take care of the younger sister, be responsible to the younger sister, set a good example for the younger sister, and take the lead in performing the tasks assigned by the elders.In this way, the elder sister has formed an independent, autonomous, sociable, and decisive character since childhood, while the younger sister has developed the habit of obeying her elder sister. This shows that a person's character is formed by the long-term education and environmental influences, but this does not apply to adults.For adults, personality is actually determined by psychological state.That is, if an adult can change his mentality, he can change his character.

Just like how to improve the ability to speak in public, any communication in daily life requires people to overcome fear and build self-confidence, which is the prerequisite for more effective speaking.Only in this way can people maximize their potential, make appropriate speeches on various occasions, win praise, win the favor of others, and achieve success. Before any speaking skill is implemented, full self-confidence must be established.Because self-confidence gives people a sense of security, so that you dare to get along with others, and freely express your views on any non-free occasions.Once you express your thoughts with passion, even on small occasions, you will diligently search for previous experience as a talking point.In this way, your vision will become more open and you will have a new understanding of your life.

Before my classes start, I do a survey asking people to say why they are in the class and what they hope to get out of this eloquence class.The results of the survey were surprising. Most people had the same central desires and basic needs. Their answer was: "When people ask me to stand up and speak, I feel very uncomfortable and scared, which prevents me from being able to communicate clearly. I can't concentrate, I don't know what I'm going to say. So, I want to gain confidence, be able to stand up in public with poise, be able to think freely, be able to summarize my thoughts in a logical order, and be able to speak in public or socially. Speak clearly and convincingly in front of people."

I believe it to be true that when you are standing in front of an audience you cannot think as carefully as when you are sitting, but this phenomenon can be improved with training.More importantly: You must exercise according to the method I said. I'll let you in on a secret that even professional speakers never quite get over their fear of going on stage—they almost always start out with some level of timidity.These timidity can be shown in their first few sentences, but they can quickly overcome this timidity and enter a calm state.And it was pretty much the same when I started talking.

The first thing you should realize is that the fear of speaking in public is beneficial to human communication because humans have an innate ability to cope with unusual challenges in their environment.When you notice your pulse and breathing quicken, don't panic, but stay calm.Because your body is always alert to external stimuli, this alertness shows that it is ready to take action to meet the challenges of the environment.Provided that this psychological preparation is carried out within a certain limit, the person concerned will therefore think faster, speak more fluently, and generally speak more incisively and forcefully than under ordinary circumstances!

Therefore, you don't have to be timid and hide in the frame you set for yourself. You should adopt a sincere and proactive attitude to communicate with people.Otherwise, fear will be out of control. It will not only cause your mind to block, your speech will not be smooth, and your muscles will become too spasm to be controlled, but it will also seriously reduce the effectiveness of your speech. In conclusion, then, it is necessary for me to repeat the following points, which will go a long way in helping you overcome your fears and speak up: (1) Your fear of speaking in public and your refusal to communicate with people are not unique.

(2) A certain level of communication fear will stimulate and motivate you instead. We are born with the ability to deal with unusual challenges in our environment. (3) Many professional orators have never quite got rid of the fear of going on stage. How to overcome your fears: (1) No matter in any social situation, humor will help you open the door to communicate with others. (2) Cultivate an optimistic attitude towards life and a strong will, and motivate yourself with a brave and tenacious spirit. (3) Actively strengthen targeted psychological training to effectively overcome negative emotions such as tension and anxiety, improve psychological adaptation and balance, enhance confidence and courage, and overcome fear with a fearless spirit. (4) The saying "knowledge is the cure for fear" is very reasonable. If you are fully prepared for all kinds of possible changes, you will improve your psychological endurance and make it difficult for fear to invade. (5) Through learning, improve the cognitive ability of things, expand the cognitive horizon, and correctly determine the source of fear. Carnegie's advice: To develop confidence and courage, act as if you really do have that confidence and courage when you are facing an audience. Be confident, this is the correct attitude you must have in everything you do.Whether you're climbing Mount Everest or talking to people, self-confidence is an essential prerequisite for your success.So, before you start talking, build your self-confidence first! In my class, many students sat together and talked about their experiences after finishing their studies. Quite a few of them believed that the most important thing they had learned was their confidence in themselves.In other words, I have more confidence in my own success.In a way, nothing leads a person to success more than self-confidence. The Bedek Travel Guide says that amateur climbers should have a guide because climbing the Alps is difficult.But a few years ago, my friend and I came to the Wilder Kaiser in the Alps and wanted to conquer this legendary and dangerous mountain.Let's start by saying that neither of us are professional climbers, but we didn't ask a guide.We have succeeded. Before we climbed the mountain, a friend asked us if we could succeed, and I told him resolutely: "I will!" "Why so sure?" the friend continued to ask. I said, "There are men who have succeeded without a guide, as we have. And I never think of failure in anything I do." So, how should specific operation develop self-confidence?You can follow the training methods below to improve your self-confidence in a targeted manner. 1. Be fully prepared and build the confidence to succeed William James, the most famous psychologist in the United States, said: "Action seems to follow the feeling, but in fact it is parallel to the feeling. Action is directly controlled by the idea, and the action is controlled by the idea. We also Feelings can be controlled indirectly, but feelings are not directly controlled by thoughts. Therefore, if we lose our original natural happiness, then the best way to make yourself happy is to sit down happily, Act like you're happy already. If that doesn't make you happy, there's no other way. So make yourself feel brave and act like you're really brave, and use your All your will to achieve this goal, then courage may well replace fear." A person achieves the goal of successful persuasion, which has a lot to do with the preparations made before speaking.Lincoln said: "No matter how powerful a person is, without careful preparation, he cannot speak systematically and at a high level." Therefore, you need to collect materials extensively and conduct in-depth research on your topic before speaking. Careful thinking.When you've confirmed that you're ready, imagine yourself speaking to someone in complete control.This is something you can easily do.You will succeed only if you believe that you can succeed, and if you believe in yourself unwaveringly. Remember William James' advice, to develop confidence and courage, act as if you really do have that confidence and courage in front of your audience. (Of course, the premise is that you must be fully prepared, otherwise no amount of performance will work.) The first way to build confidence is if you already know what you are going to say, you should stride onto the stage with ease and take a deep breath.Breathing deeply for 30 seconds can refresh you, give you confidence and courage.The famous tenor Jean de Raschi used to say, "When you have air in your chest, the tension goes away." Another way is to stand up straight, look your audience in the eye, and speak with confidence, as if everyone owes you money and they're just asking for grace to pay their debt.This psychological effect will greatly help you stabilize your emotions. If we can overcome our fear of speaking in public, it can have a huge, subtle effect on everything else we do.Those who take on this challenge will find themselves on the way to perfection, conquering the fear of public speaking, and transforming themselves into a richer, more fulfilling life. A student salesman in my class once put it this way: "After standing up a few times in class, I felt like I could handle anyone. One morning, I found a buyer who was usually aggressive. Before he had time to say 'No', I had samples spread out on his desk. As it turned out, he gave me the biggest order yet!" A housewife also told me: "I used to be afraid to invite my neighbors to my house because I was afraid that we wouldn't be able to have a good conversation and jokes. But after several lectures and standing up to speak, I decided to have a family dinner. The banquet was very successful, and I walked among the guests, chatting and laughing with them to my heart's content." At another graduating class’s evening party, a clerk said: “At first, I was afraid to talk to customers, and I was always terrified every time. After speaking a few times in the class, I felt confident, and talking to customers was also easy. I took it easy. I started to speak up and disagree. In the first month after I took speech classes, my sales increased by nearly half.” Through this effective training, the trainees realized that they had easily overcome their fear or anxiety; that they had succeeded where they might have failed before.They gain confidence from speaking in public and allow themselves to face each day's offerings with confidence. You, too, can gain this sense of triumph and meet life's challenges.If you can do this, problems that once terrified you can become enjoyable challenges that spice up your life. 2. Conduct corrective training for your own deficiencies If there are indeed some deficiencies, you can carry out targeted training to overcome these difficulties and deficiencies, so as to build self-confidence. Demosthenes, who ranked first among the "Ten Great Speakers" in ancient Greece, had a stuttering problem since he was a child, and when he spoke, he always had one shoulder high and the other shoulder low, and he kept shaking.In such an era that advocates eloquence, such people will naturally be discriminated against.He was very distressed and had a deep sense of inferiority.However, he was not overwhelmed by inferiority complex, but trained hard with extraordinary perseverance and hard-working spirit.Every morning he stands by the seaside, practicing with a stone in his mouth.In response to the problem of shaking, he practiced in front of the mirror and hung two swords on his shoulders so that he would not shake.After assiduous training, he became, as we now know, a very good and respected orator. 3. Self-suggestion, believing that you can succeed A young British lawyer is going to argue with a group of well-known lawyers in court. He has made sufficient preparations, but he still feels uneasy.Worrying about screwing up the debate.So, he went to ask Mr. Faraday, and he asked Faraday: "My opponent knows much more than me, and I will definitely lose." Mr. Faraday told him simply and plainly: "If you want to succeed, tell yourself they don't know anything!" Many people will face the same problem as this young man, and their real difficulties do not lie in the two points mentioned above.Because the vast majority of us are not as unfortunate as Demosthenes, have no stuttering problems, and no other deficiencies. Psychologically speaking, low self-esteem or shyness always exists in us to varying degrees.A survey in the United States shows that when contacting strangers at a banquet, about 3/4 of the people feel embarrassed; similarly, examples of speech or other speech failures caused by shyness or inferiority complex are common.It can be seen that a person has no self-confidence, not because he is really inferior by nature, but because he thinks so.Therefore, only by completely overcoming this feeling can you perform normally or even supernormally. All your preparations are for those few minutes of speaking.No matter how well-prepared you are, in general, a feeling of insecurity can strike you when speaking.It may be caused by your fear that you are not quite ready—in fact, you are quite prepared, but you think you may have missed something, or it may be because you are worried that the audience is better than you, and What you are saying is too simple for them; or you are worried that something unexpected may happen, such as someone interrupting you in the middle of your speech, etc.The deadliest thing these thoughts do is give you negative self-suggestions, and you have to figure out how to get them out of your mind. To be successful in public speaking, it is necessary to give yourself certain positive cues.Try the method below, which has been worked out over the years. 1. Convinced that the topic has value After the topic of the speech is selected, it should be collected and sorted according to the situation, and discussed with friends.But this kind of preparation is not very sufficient, and you have to convince yourself that the subject matter is valuable, so you must have a firm attitude to motivate yourself and believe in yourself. How can I convince myself of this?This involves studying the subject matter of the speech in detail, grasping its deeper meaning, and implying to yourself that your speech will help the audience, and they will become better people after hearing it. 2. Stop thinking about things that distract you For example, if you imagine that you might make a grammatical error, or suddenly stop speaking, these negative thoughts are likely to cause you to lose confidence before you even start. It is especially important to take the attention away from yourself before speaking.Concentrate, listen to what other speakers are saying, and keep your attention on them so it doesn't cause you undue stage dread. 3. Engage in proper self-motivation It is possible for any speaker to have doubts about the subject matter of his speech.For example, he will ask himself whether the topic is suitable for him, whether the audience will be interested, etc., so he is likely to change the topic in a single thought.At this time, negative thoughts are very likely to completely destroy your self-confidence, so you should cheer yourself up first, and encourage yourself with simple words: "This talk is well suited to me, because it comes from my experience, from my view of life; I will give this particular talk better than any other audience; Be clear." Does this age-old method really work?certainly.Modern experimental psychologists agree that this motivation, even if feigned, by autosuggestion is the most powerful driver of rapid learning.That being the case, the effect of sincere self-motivation based on facts will naturally be better. How to quickly increase self-confidence: (1) Find out the root causes of your low self-confidence and find ways to solve them. (2) Your self-confidence will lead you to success, so you need to stand up and speak confidently without thinking about anything. (3) If you can find out that you just have stage fright - which is not necessarily due to lack of self-confidence - then the problem is much easier to deal with, because you can exaggerately believe that almost everyone is afraid of public speaking. Carnegie's advice: The self-suggestion brought about by the level of the goal directly determines the size of our behavioral ability. When a person goes up the stairs, aiming at the 6th floor and the 12th floor respectively, the fatigue state will appear differently in the morning and evening.I've found that if you aim for tier 12, the fatigue state comes later.Because when you climb to the 6th floor, your subconscious mind will hint to yourself: there is still half of it, don't be tired now!So you keep going up the stairs. What does this show?The self-suggestion brought about by the level of the goal directly determines the size of our behavioral ability.Furthermore, we can draw the conclusion that consciousness not only affects your mental state, but also directly affects your physiological state.This is the importance of psychological suggestion. You may still have some doubts, does self-suggestion really work?Yes.Modern experimental psychologists agree that motivation, even if feigned, by autosuggestion is one of the most powerful triggers for rapid learning.So, make positive autosuggestions to yourself. William James once said something like this: "People usually think that action always follows feeling, but in fact, the two are in a co-existing relationship. Action is conditioned by people's will. By restricting action, will can indirectly Condition the senses, which are not under the direct control of the will." "So when we are no longer happy, the only way to change is to sleep happily, eat, talk, and try to act like you are happy. If that doesn't improve your mood, nothing else will. There is a way. Make yourself brave, even if it is only in actions, because people are always used to self-hypnosis. Actions can indirectly affect how you feel, and then mobilize all your will to achieve this end. In this way, courage will also Instead of fear." This is a psychological suggestion.If you doubt this theory, you can talk to someone who has read this book and followed this method, or someone who has taken my training class, and you will be convinced of it. Next I will give an example to prove the validity of this theory of psychological suggestion, this person is regarded as a symbol of courage.He had his moments of timidity, but he was determined to rely only on himself.So, after unremitting efforts, he finally became a respected warrior.He was Theodore Roosevelt who opposed the trusts, swayed the audience with his words, and waved the presidential scepter in his hand.In his autobiography, he wrote: "I was a sickly and clumsy child. When I was young, I was often in a state of tension and had no confidence in myself, so I had to train myself hard. This kind of training is not only physical, but also spiritual and spiritual." How did such a child become a warrior?In his autobiography, he explained the reasons for his transformation: "I read a passage in Mariere's book, which was very impressive, and I kept it in my heart all the time. It was the captain of a small British warship. A passage explaining how it is possible to live with dignity and fearlessness. He said that everyone is nervous and insecure when it comes to taking action in the first place. It is important not to let this feeling of fear continue. The method you should take is Control himself, pretending nothing happened on the surface. Persevere in this way, and the pretend will become reality. He just wanted to practice a strong will, but this practice made him a real brave man." "That's how I trained myself. In the beginning, I was afraid of everything from grizzly bears to wild horses and shotguns, but I tried to pretend I wasn't. Slowly, I stopped being afraid. People would, if they wanted to." Be like me," Roosevelt said. During World War II, a Jew tried to get out of a Nazi concentration camp alive.People say that this is impossible-the crazy Nazis may pull them out and shoot them in batches at any time. In addition, the harsh living environment makes people sick, contagious and even die one after another.In short, people have lost confidence in survival.However, the Jew secretly told himself: "On a certain day, the coalition forces will definitely come to save us. Before that, I must live a good life." As a result, before the day he planned came, he His companions died one by one, but he survived tenaciously!However, when his appointed day came, he, like his companions, rapidly weakened and died. From the above examples, we can see that psychological suggestion can indeed bring us courage.Positive psychological hints can enable us to overcome fear and overcome difficulties, which is very beneficial to us in everything we do.Those who take on this challenge will find themselves transformed to enjoy a richer, better life. So, when you speak up or need courage to overcome difficulties, you might as well put on a confident look.If you're ready, be brave enough to say what you want to say! Tips for staying optimistic: (1) It doesn't matter even if you are a little nervous, the key is to handle it correctly. (2) If you make a mistake while speaking, take it as your humor or something.In short, give yourself appropriate and positive psychological hints.Tell yourself: everything is fine. Carnegie's advice: Whenever you feel intimidated, ask yourself, "If they've all been successful, why can't I?" Everyone wants to speak eloquently in front of everyone, and has an enviable conversational skill.But many people end up complaining like this: "I also know that I need to muster courage, but when I want to speak, it seems that it is not easy to do." This problem is what most people will encounter when speaking. question.So, let's talk about how to have courage. Mr. Gu Liqu, chairman of Gu Liqu Company, came to my office one day.He said to me: "I have never been afraid to speak up in my life. But as the chairman, I have to chair the meeting. Although I have known the directors for many years, when I stand up and speak, I Just can't say a word. It's been years since I've been that way, and I'm so sick. Mr. Carnegie, I find it hard to believe that you can help me out of it." "In that case, why are you still looking for me?" I asked him. "This is because of such a thing happened." Mr. Gu Liqu replied, "One of my accountants turned out to be a shy guy. Before he walked into his office, he had to go through my office. Before he All looking at the floor, not saying a word, and tiptoeing past my office. But recently, that has changed. Now he keeps his jaw up, his eyes sparkle, and he says hello to me , which surprised me. I asked him: 'Who changed you?' He told me 'Mr. Carnegie.' I came to you because I couldn't believe it." "If you want to change like this accountant," I told him, "you can take regular classes." "If you can really make me talk without being afraid," said Mr. Gulliver, "I shall be the happiest man I can be." Sure enough, Mr. Gu Liqu came to participate in our training.In fact, he's making rapid progress. One day three months later, I invited him to a party of 3,000 people in the ballroom of the Astor Hotel, and invited him to talk to the guests about the experience of attending Carnegie's eloquence training class.He was sorry to say he couldn't come because he had an important appointment scheduled.But, the next day, he called me again and said, "Mr. Carnegie, I've canceled my appointment. I must come to this party because I owe you that. I'm going to tell people the Carnegie Eloquence Class for me. It has really turned me into the happiest person in the world. I hope my story can inspire people to let go of the fear that takes their lives away." At the party, Mr. Gu Liqu talked to 3,000 people for more than 10 minutes, but I only asked him to talk for 2 minutes.When the audience was moved by his wonderful speech, who would have thought that he would be terrified when he spoke? If you wish to be like Mr. Gu Liqu, you too can master this art in a short time.In fact, as Mr. Gu Liqu wanted to tell people in his speech, you can fully realize from his experience that speaking is not a difficult thing.That said, you can use his experience to build your own courage.When you can't speak because of fear, you can think: "Since Mr. Gu Liqu can do it, I can do it too." When we talk to those important people, conduct business negotiations, or even just in ordinary conversations with people, if you feel very shy, you can borrow other people's experience to summon up your courage; at different times, you can Think of corresponding stories to achieve the purpose of mustering up your courage. I once conducted a survey of those good talkers, and found that almost all of them were shy at one time, and even now—as I said earlier—when they express their opinions, negotiate or persuade The nervousness has not been completely eliminated.Andrew Carnegie, the steel magnate who moved freely in the social arena, often said to people: "Although I am shy by nature, I try to make myself a good talker." I hope you will have the opportunity to visit my home and I will show you the thank you notes I have received from all over the world.Some of the people who wrote the letters were business leaders, some were governors, members of Congress, university presidents and stars in the entertainment industry, and more were business executives, workers, union members, college students, housewives, pastors, etc. They are ordinary people who are unknown to the public. What they have in common is that they all feel that they need to express their opinions and communicate with others in order to be understood and accepted by others, but they lack enough courage and self-confidence—that is, they are not good at words at first .It is precisely because they have achieved certain results and achieved their goals that they are grateful and wrote to me to express their gratitude. So when you need the courage to speak at a drinking party or negotiate with your client—indeed, any time you need to be eloquent—you can use the experience of others to motivate yourself.Whenever you're feeling intimidated, ask yourself, "If they've all been successful, why can't I?" How to learn from the experience of others: (1) The best way to overcome the fear of catastrophe when speaking in public is to first gain successful experience and use it to continuously motivate yourself. (2) You can choose a story of someone who impresses you, or is similar to your initial situation, but succeeded later to encourage your courage.You should think that everyone begins with timidity.When you feel fear, think about how others have successfully dealt with that fear. (3) Understand the methods of others to overcome fear, such as psychological suggestion, muscle training, deep breathing, etc., and train them consciously.Or simply imagine yourself as someone else, and imagine your fear as just another person's experience—and he finally succeeded! Carnegie's advice: Know that even if you don't say yes, the sky will never fall, and no one will blame you. When George Bernard Shaw introduced his experience in improving eloquence to others, he said: "I borrowed from my own method of learning ice skating-I made myself look stupid until I learned it." Whether you want to be an excellent speaker like George Bernard Shaw, Whether you just want to take your time speaking in front of people, you should take every opportunity to practice and try to "make a fool of yourself". We all know that one can never learn to swim if one does not get into the water.The same goes for the ability to speak.No matter how much you learn about eloquence or about pronunciation, you can't learn it if you don't speak.In all the examples of good talkers I gave earlier, if they didn't talk often and didn't think about how to talk better, they couldn't be successful. After World War I, the curriculum I taught at the Young Christians on 125th Street changed from what it had been.Every year I add new ideas to the curriculum and some old ones get thrown out.But one thing has not changed, that is, every student in the training class is required to speak in public at least once, and more often at least twice.I don't think you'll ever learn how to speak if you don't practice it a lot.Therefore, this book is only a guide for you, and you have to have your own practice. Everyone will have an ideal self-image, and hope that others will see themselves in a favorable light.When he comes into contact with a stranger, interacts with the opposite sex, talks with authority figures, or speaks in public, he will involuntarily realize that his self-image is facing some kind of threat, worrying that he will make mistakes and make a fool of himself in public. Fear that others will say that I am "stupid", "not good enough" or "pushing", "good performance", etc.Many people are reluctant to speak because of the uncertainty of the possible consequences of speaking.This worry is completely unnecessary.You know, even if you don't say yes, the sky will never fall, and no one will blame you. Opportunities to speak abound.Look around yourself, and you will find that there is no place where you don't need to talk.You can consciously join some organizations and engage in some work that requires speaking; you can also stand up at a party and say a few words, even if it is just a few words to echo others.When you are in a meeting, don't let yourself hide in the corner, but order yourself to stand up and speak bravely.Only in this way, you will know how you have progressed, and you will learn the ability to speak. When you speak, you may not even know what point you want to express at first, let alone the literary grace and embellishment, but it is not a big deal.The most important thing is that you have managed to speak, and if you can keep at it, that's what you need to care about next.No matter how profound your knowledge and how wise your brain is, don't expect to be able to express it clearly to others at the beginning.Any successful talker has come from this step. "I understand all the reasons you said," a young business executive student said to me once, "but I still hesitate. I seem to be afraid of the difficulties and trials of learning." "What is the difficulty, what is the trial?" I said, "throw away these thoughts quickly! Why can't you look at the matter with a right conquering spirit?" "What spirit is that?" he asked. "Adventurous," I said.Then I talked to him about some examples of success through speaking, and good changes in his personality have also taken place. "I'm going to try it, and I'm going to take on this adventure," he concluded. The book you are reading is a book about risky action.As you continue to read this book and plan to put it into practice, you are also taking on the same adventure as he did.You will find that your self-direction skills and keen observation skills will help you in this adventure; you will also find that this adventure will change you from the inside out. Cherish every opportunity to speak: (1) When you miss an opportunity to speak, you should feel very sorry. (2) Take every opportunity to speak.If you don't speak, you will never improve your speaking ability, and others will get this opportunity to exercise. (3) Progress comes slowly one at a time.Every time you deliver a public speaking, you are one step closer to your goal of success. Carnegie's advice: If you want to do something well, you can do it well.If you want to be rich, you can be rich; if you want to be learned, you will be learned. A graduate of a Carnegie training class said: "When I started to speak, I would rather be whipped than open; but when it was over, I would rather be shot than stop." Almost everyone longs for Gain the ability to have a successful conversation and want to experience that wonderful feeling of "not wanting to stop". Mr. Gu Liqu mentioned above said that it was the Carnegie training class that made him no longer afraid of speaking, enabled him to speak eloquently in front of 3,000 people, and made him "the happiest person in the world" - let Talking becomes a kind of joy, which is the purpose of the Carnegie training class.And I think that this purpose is far more important than any other. The reason why Mr. Gu Liqu participated in the Carnegie training class, and the reason why he was able to do the homework assigned by the Carnegie training class, was precisely because he had foreseen that the success of speaking would bring him pleasure.Mr. Gu Liqu put himself into the ideal of the future, and then worked hard to make his dream come true.In the end, as we have seen, he succeeded. After the death of Carnegie, the steel magnate, people found among his belongings the plan he had drawn up when he was 32 years old.He was preparing to retire to Oxford to be fully educated, with "particular attention to the study of public speaking".So why do people work on improving their speaking skills?In other words, what is the significance of the success of speaking to people? We might as well imagine: facing an innumerable audience, stepping onto the podium confidently, listening to the silence of the audience after the opening, and feeling the moment when the audience is deeply attracted by your simple, humorous speech. A kind of full attention, experience the sense of accomplishment when the audience gives you endless thunderous applause, and then you accept everyone's appreciation for you with a smile... Of course, the benefits of improving your speaking ability are not limited to being able to deliver successful speeches in formal occasions.Go ahead and imagine; relying on your eloquence, you have won a huge amount of business through tactful negotiations with the other party; relying on humor and temperamental eloquence, you have won the heart of the girl you love, and you have walked forward together with her. The palace of marriage, relying on your persuasive eloquence, you have made one country stop using force against another country, and hundreds of millions of people have avoided the disaster of war, and you have been respected by people... What is more attractive than this What about people? Many students who come to the eloquence training class are mostly because they feel timid and restrained in social life, including politicians, celebrities, and ordinary people.Mostly they used to be in a situation where they felt overwhelmed when they stood up to speak and couldn't even get a full sentence out when they had to speak in front of a large number of people, even acquaintances .In such situations, they feel as if they are not themselves anymore because they have absolutely no control over themselves. But after completing the course of the training class, their changes made them all impressed.They found that it was no longer difficult to let themselves speak.They all felt that their previous shyness and restraint were childish and ridiculous.Of course, the natural and easy demeanor they cultivated in the training process also impresses their friends, family or customers.They begin to build their own confidence while at the same time managing their relationships with others with ease, which affects their entire lives. After Carnegie's eloquence training, the improvement of eloquence ability will also affect people's character to varying degrees, even if it does not necessarily appear quickly.When I asked Dr. David Ormen, a surgeon in Atlantic City and president of the American Medical Association, "What are the benefits of public speaking training in terms of mental health?" he replied, "Answer this The problem is, it is better to write a prescription, which must be filled by each person himself. If he thinks he can't, he is wrong." Here is the prescription that Dr. Ormen gave us. Strive to develop the ability to allow others to enter your mind and heart.Try to articulate your thoughts and ideas in person, or in public.As you progress through this effort, you will discover that you—your true self—are truly shaping a new image, surprising those around you like never before.When you try to talk to others, your self-confidence will increase, and your personality will become more and more gentle and beautiful, which means that your emotions have gradually improved.In turn, your emotions will make your body better.Men, women and children of this world need to speak.Even if I don't know what other benefits speech brings in business and industry, I still believe that it has infinite benefits.However, I do understand its health benefits.Speak to a few people, or many, whenever you get a chance—and you'll get better at it, as I did myself.At the same time, you'll feel refreshed and complete in a way you haven't felt before. "It's a pleasant and wonderful feeling, and no drug can give you this feeling." Dr. Omen described it. The words of William James, the most outstanding professor of psychology at Harvard University, can explain this exactly. He said: "Almost no matter what kind of course, as long as you are full of enthusiasm for it, you can complete it successfully. If you care enough about the results, You can achieve it; if you wish to do a thing well, you can do it well; if you wish to be rich, you can be rich; if you wish to be learned, you will be learned. Only then will you truly wish Looking forward to these things, looking forward to them without distraction, instead of wasting your mind and thinking about many irrelevant chores." "Don't learn with a speculative attitude," Waters warned us. "This attitude will only get us nowhere. You should first make a plan for yourself, set a goal, and then work hard to achieve this goal. When you put your energy and talents on it, then you will not be far away from success. And what I call a speculative learning attitude refers to the kind of people who think that what they have learned will not be far away in the future. Time may bring benefits but no direction of learning." Visualize yourself successfully doing what you are currently dreading doing, and imagine yourself being able to speak in a variety of work and social situations.Your point of view is accepted by everyone and has brought you many benefits.This goes a long way toward achieving your goals.Therefore, it is very important to keep your goals in mind at all times. It is very important for you to focus all your energy, not to lose sight of your self-confidence and the ability to speak with eloquence.Just think about the social importance of the friends you make from this, how much your ability to serve the public and society will be greatly enhanced, and the profound impact it will have on your life and career... In short , think that it will pave the way for you to realize your own value in the future, and you will be able to achieve your goals. How to achieve the desired goal: (1) Always keep in mind the benefits that achieving your goals will bring you. (2) Clarify your goal and write it in a conspicuous place-it is best to "write" it in your heart and remind yourself every morning. (3) Think back to your previous shyness and embarrassment when speaking, as well as the embarrassment and other consequences caused by it, and you will inspire the motivation to improve your eloquence. Carnegie's advice: People—no matter who they are—have unlimited potential abilities, but whether they can be developed or not often depends on each person's own attitude. "If you care enough about the result, you can make it happen." This is a quote from William James, which I use here to introduce me.He said: "Here, you can understand it as a belief that you must win. Because when your goal is attractive enough to you, you will establish a belief that you must succeed. In any At this time, tell yourself, I must, and I can succeed. In this way, you can succeed.” The secret of Caesar's success was that he let his soldiers know that they must succeed and there is no retreat.How did Caesar win when he crossed the sea from Gaul with his army and landed in what is now England?He took his troops to the white rock cliffs of the Strait of Dover and made his soldiers watch burning ships 200 feet below his feet.The soldiers knew that with their last link to the mainland severed, their means of retreat burned, the only thing left to do was to advance, to conquer, to win.In this way, Caesar and his army succeeded. Why not allow yourself that spirit when you want to overcome the fear of facing an audience and the difficulties that inevitably come with improving your speaking skills?Throw all negative thoughts into the fire, and close the door behind you to hesitation and withdrawal—and you will succeed. Many famous people have achieved success thanks to this approach - Professor George Davidson of Yale University relied on this powerful belief to achieve success. When he was young, George had a dream. He hoped to change the world and serve all mankind.In order to achieve this ideal, he needs to receive the best education, and the United States is his ideal place.At that time, George was penniless, and it was simply a fantasy to go to the United States, which is 10,000 kilometers away.Still, he set off. He set off on foot from his native village in Nyasaland through the East African wilderness to Cairo, where he could reach the United States by boat.All he wants is to reach the country that can help him change his destiny, and he can ignore everything else.He encountered great difficulties from the very beginning.It took him five days to trek 25 miles (about 40 kilometers) on the rugged African continent.His food was gone, his water was gone, and besides, he was penniless.He still needs to go on for thousands of miles. turn back?Or risk your life?George knew that to turn back was to give up, to return to poverty and ignorance.And he didn't want to.He believes that he can overcome these difficulties and reach his goal.So he said to himself, "Go on, unless I die." And he went on alone.He often sleeps on the ground and sustains himself with wild fruits and other plants.The journey had made him emaciated.Due to extreme exhaustion and almost hopeless discouragement, several times he wanted to give up.But whenever this happens, he cheers himself up.Finally, he overcame his cowardice and moved on with confidence. After all kinds of hardships and pains, in October 1950, George finally came to the United States in two years, and proudly stepped into the gate of Skadzit Canyon College.With a focus on goals and an almost divine belief in success, George overcame difficulties that ordinary people could not overcome.What could be more difficult than this? On a radio show, the host asked me to describe the most important lesson I learned in 3 sentences.Here's what I said at the time: "The most important lesson I've learned is that our thoughts are very important to us. If I can understand a person's thoughts, I can understand him as a person, because it is thoughts that make us. And if we can change our thoughts, we can change our lives.” Start now by actively envisioning that your efforts will ultimately lead to your success.In order to achieve your goals, you need to develop a strong enough self-confidence and belief that your goals will be achieved. You must maintain a relaxed and optimistic attitude towards the results of your speaking ability training efforts.You should expect that the result of your efforts will be that when it comes time to stand up and speak in front of a group, you will be able to speak at your leisure and express your point of view clearly.You must imprint your resolution and conviction on every word, every action, and strive to cultivate this ability. There was a guy named Joe Haversty who was trained in the Carnegie class.One day he stood up and said confidently that he was not content to be a homebuilder, but that he wanted to be the spokesman for the National Association of Home Builders.What he wants to do most is to travel around the country, telling people about his problems and achievements in the home building industry.What is commendable is that he not only has a fanatical pursuit of ideals, but also really does what he says. What he wanted to talk about included not only local issues, but also national issues.For such an idea, he did not half-heartedly, but prepared his speech carefully and practiced it carefully.During the class, he never missed a class; no matter how busy he was, he still followed the requirements of the training class meticulously.As a result, his progress was very rapid, which surprised everyone.Two months later, he became a leader in the class and was elected monitor. About a year later, Joe Haversday's teacher wrote: "I have almost forgotten about Joe Haversday from Ohio. I was having breakfast one morning when I inadvertently opened the Wizard of Virginia At the time, there was a photo of Joe prominently displayed in the book and a report that praised him. According to the report, he gave a wonderful speech at a big gathering of area builders the night before. At this time Joe is no longer the spokesman for the National Institute of Home Builders, he's almost president." Why was Joe Haversty successful?Because he has a strong desire, maintains a high degree of enthusiasm, and has the strong will to overcome difficulties.More importantly, he believes that he will be able to succeed. A successful person does not necessarily have abilities and talents different from ordinary people, but he firmly believes that he will be able to succeed, and he will devote all his energy to the pursuit of success.In this way, the probability of success will be greatly improved. Because people—no matter who they are—have unlimited potential abilities, but whether they can be developed or not often depends on each person's own attitude.If you believe that you can succeed, then you must succeed. There is only one shortcut to success—persist in: (1) When you speak, tell yourself that you will succeed.Tell yourself: success is not that difficult. (2) Please remember those good talkers, they were not good at the beginning, even worse than you. (3) Never complain about the difficulties you have encountered, because your difficulties have been overcome by many people. Carnegie's advice: When you encounter difficulties, don't think about why there are these problems, because there are already these problems. We want to be successful, then we need to have strong willpower when we do anything.In this section, I'm going to talk specifically about willpower.Strong willpower requires us to concentrate in the process of hard work, to have the tenacity not to give up until we reach the goal, and to have the indomitable spirit to overcome difficulties. British political activist and novelist Edward Lipton was a success.He visited many places in his life, saw a wide range, and actively participated in political activities and various social affairs; in addition, he also published 60 books, and these topics required in-depth research.People were surprised that he still had time to do research when he was busy all day, so they asked him: "You have completed so many writings in the midst of your busy schedule. Do you have a clone technique that can complete so many tasks at the same time?" Of course Edward does not have avatar skills, what he possesses is a strong willpower.He usually spends 3 hours a day or less researching, reading, and writing, but he makes the most of those 3 hours.During these hours, he devoted himself fully to his study and research, with extremely single-mindedness.It is this strong willpower that enabled him to achieve great achievements in a small amount of time. In the process of working to improve our eloquence, we also need to train like Edward Lipton.Because only by making full use of your limited time and concentrating on improving your eloquence can you finally succeed. I gave the example of Joe Haversty's success earlier.On the one hand, the reason for Joe Haversty's success is that he firmly believes that he can succeed, and on the other hand, he has a strong willpower. On the road to success, he relies on this excellent quality to drive away difficulties.During the initial training, you will inevitably encounter setbacks and difficulties.These difficulties can be traumatic to varying degrees and can shake your confidence. When you encounter difficulties, don't think about why there are these problems, because there are already these problems.You know, nothing in this world can replace perseverance and determination.Many people have talents but fail because of lack of perseverance and determination.We must believe that the most difficult time is when we are not far from success.The secret of success is actually very simple, that is, we cannot allow ourselves to be a little bit discouraged at any time. Let me cite another story of a business legend named Clarence B. Randall, who is now at the top of the corporate ladder.When Mr. Randall stood up to speak for the first time in college, he failed, like so many people, because he was not good at words.At that time, the teacher stipulated that everyone had 5 minutes to speak, but he turned pale when he was less than halfway through the speech, and had to walk off the podium in embarrassment. However, although he had such an experience, he was not reconciled to failure.He was determined to become a good talker, and he has been working tirelessly, and finally became the government's economic adviser, admired by the world.He has written many inspiring books.In one of his books, The Conviction of Liberty, he mentions his public speaking: “My speaking schedule is very tight because I attend various gatherings, including those held by the Manufacturers Association, the Department of Commerce, the Rotary Club Fundraiser, the Alumni Association, and other groups. I was in Texas, Michigan Kenaba gave patriotic speeches and impassioned commitment to World War I, and I went to the countryside with Mickey Ronnie to give charity lectures, with Harvard President James Blount Conan, University of Chicago President Rob M. Hutchins went to the countryside to do educational campaigns; my French was terrible, but I gave an after-dinner speech in French." "I think I understand what the audience wants to hear and how they want it to be said," Randall said. "The trick here, as a speaker, is that there is nothing you can't learn if you're willing to learn it." .” Determination and belief in success are the key factors that determine whether you can become a master speaker. This is the experience and inspiration that can be obtained from Randall's story.If I know your mind, the strength of your will, and your optimism, I can predict exactly how quickly you will improve your public speaking skills. Anyone who wishes to meet the challenge of language, to be able to express himself simply and clearly, and to let others know his talents, must have a firm determination.Of those who have succeeded in acquiring the skill of speaking, only a few are truly geniuses, and most are ordinary people like you and me.However, because they persisted, they also succeeded.As for the more special people, sometimes they will be discouraged and fail to persevere, and the result is mediocre instead.As long as you have the courage and the goal, when you reach the end of the road, you will often climb to the top. Your willpower is the key to success: (1) A person's success depends to a large extent on his degree of belief.Successful people only have one more persistence. (2) When encountering difficulties, imagine the happiness you will have after overcoming it. (3) If you are half-hearted about eloquence training because you can't see the actual benefits, wishing alone cannot make you stick to it willingly. (4) When you fail enough times and you don't get knocked down, you will succeed. (5) In the face of a more difficult new task, imagine the successful experience in the past. Since it was successful before, it will definitely be successful this time.