Chapter 48 3. Try to understand, not blame your loved one

Introduction: Instead of criticizing and blaming others, we should try to understand them, especially for our family members. Regarding the causes of unhappy marriages, Dix, the number one authoritative expert in the United States, said: "In all marriages, more than 50% are unhappy; one of the reasons why many romantic dreams are shattered is that those who are useless It’s a heartbreaking criticism.” In this regard, there are two practices worth learning from.In the official life of the state, Disraeli's strongest opponent was Gladstone.The two of them were likely to argue and clash violently about everything in the British Empire.However, what they have in common is that their private lives are filled with happiness and joy.

Gladstone and his wife lived together for 59 years, almost 60, and they have always loved and respected each other.I like to imagine the most venerable prime minister in British history: Gladstone holding his wife's hand, dancing and singing around the fire rug. Gladstone was a formidable figure in public, but he was never critical at home.For example, when he goes downstairs for breakfast while the whole family is sleeping in, he expresses his displeasure in a gentle way.He would raise his voice and sing a song whose name he didn't know, filling the house with mysterious singing as a way of reminding his family that the busiest people in all of Britain were downstairs waiting for breakfast, all alone.He always maintains a diplomatic demeanor, can understand others, and tries his best to restrain himself from criticizing anyone or anything at home.

The same is often true of Catherine II, Empress of Russia. Catherine once ruled one of the largest empires in history, holding the life and death power of millions of subjects and people.Politically, she was a tyrant who waged senseless wars and imposed death sentences on her enemies.But if her cook burnt the meat, she said nothing and ate it with a smile.Her tolerant and generous approach is worth learning for ordinary husbands. There is much wrongdoing in the family, as many parents criticize their children at every turn.You'd think I'd say "don't criticize" to this.But I don't mean to say that, but to say "Before you criticize your children, please read "The Inconsiderate Father" is a typical American journalism education article."This article was originally published in the editorial section of Family Chronicle.With the author's consent, I will place this article below according to the excerpt version of "Reader's Digest".

"The Inconsiderate Father" is a short essay. Although it was written by the author Livingstone Lollard under the impulse of the moment, it still touched many readers, so that it became a favorite of everyone. Reprinted article.Perhaps as the author said: "It has been published in hundreds of newspapers and magazines all over the United States, and almost the same abroad. I have also allowed tens of millions of people to read this article in schools, churches, and lecture platforms. It has also been rebroadcast or broadcast countless times on TV and radio. It is strange that not only university publications reproduce it, but also high school publications. Sometimes a small article can resonate deeply with people. This article really had that effect."

Instead of criticizing others, we all try to understand them, especially our family members.We're going to try to understand why they did that.This is beneficial and much more meaningful than criticism.As Dr. Jensen said, "Sir, God will not judge the world until the end of the world." Please sweep "blame" out of the house: (1) To maintain a happy family life, please do not criticize. (2) Many romantic dreams have been shattered, one of the reasons being useless but heartbreaking criticism.