Chapter 8 Everyone wants to find a good reason for themselves

Each of us has ideal elements, no matter what we do, we are willing to find a good reason for ourselves.Therefore, if you want to change others, you must give him such a reason. I spent my childhood in rural Missouri where carjacker Jesse James was active, and I visited James' farm in Kearney, where Jesse James' son still lives. His wife told me about the past, how Jesse robbed trains and banks, how he distributed the looted property to nearby farmers so that they could pay off the bank's debts, and so on. Jesse James probably wanted to be a hero, as did Schultz, "Two Gun" Crowley, and Al Capone.In fact, everyone you meet, including yourself, thinks highly of themselves and thinks of themselves as a genuinely good person who is always selflessly on the side of what is right.

J. Pierport Morgan said in the book: People do things for no more than two reasons, one is the real reason, and the other is the reason that sounds good. Everyone knows the real reason, and there is no need to talk nonsense.However, everyone has ideals and is always willing to find a good reason.Therefore, if you want to change them, you must give them such a reason. Does this work?Let me give some examples.Mr. Hamilton Farrier of Farrier Mill Co., Glenn Alden, Pennsylvania, had a tenant who was very dissatisfied with the house and threatened to move.The tenant had four months left on his rental contract, and the monthly rent for the house was $55; although the contract had not yet expired, the tenant told Mr. Farrier that he was moving out immediately.

Farrier said to the class: "This man has lived in my house for a winter, and after the winter, the house is not easy to rent, and the rent is also low. It is necessary to rent the house out before the fall." It was very difficult. At that time, in my opinion, the $200 was gone for nothing. Under normal circumstances, I would have directly tried to retain the tenant, telling him that he must act in accordance with the rental contract, and even if he wants to move, he must leave The money for the remaining 4 months stipulated in the contract was handed over to me. "However, I didn't do that with excitement. I decided to try something else. I started saying to him like this: 'Sir, I've seen what you mean, I believe you intend to move. I rented the house for many years, I know how to observe people's nature. I have watched you carefully from the beginning. I think you are an honest and trustworthy person. I am so sure of this that I let you the house.'

"'Now, I suggest that you put your decision aside for a few days and think it over carefully. Come to me before the rent is due at the beginning of the month. If you still plan to move at that time, I promise, I will accept your offer. Decision. I will admit that my judgment was wrong and allow you to move. However, I still believe that you will keep your word and you will definitely live for the date stipulated in the contract. After all, we are humans or monkeys, it depends on how we do up!' "When the next month came, the tenant found me and paid the rent again. He said that he had discussed with his wife and they decided to continue living here. They felt that the only decent way to do it was to live until the end of their contract. Full."

During his lifetime, Nord Northcliffe once discovered that a newspaper had published a personal photo that he particularly did not want to publish, so he wrote a letter to the editor.He didn't write: "Please don't publish that picture of me again, I don't like it." He found a good reason.Taking advantage of people's respect for mothers, he wrote: "Please don't publish that picture of me again, my mother doesn't like that picture." When John Rockefeller wanted to stop newspaper photojournalists from taking pictures of his children, he also found a good reason.He didn't say, "I don't want their picture in the newspaper." He played on the desire to protect young children.He said: "You all know the nature of children. Some of you have children yourself. You all know that it is not a good thing for children to be in the limelight."

Cyrus Cortis, from Maine, had worked his way up from a poor boy to a millionaire, owning the Saturday Evening Post and Ladies' Home Weekly.At the beginning of his business, he couldn't get as high a remuneration as other magazines, and he couldn't get a good author's manuscript, so he found a good reason for them.For example, he even had an appointment with Miss Alcott, the author of "Little Women", when she was famous.He did it for just $100, which he sent to one of her favorite charities. Some will say skeptically: "This approach might work for Northcliff, Rockefeller, or a sentimental writer. But I want to see how you apply it to my debts." What will happen to those rude fellows in the world?"

Perhaps, they are right, there is no one-size-fits-all solution, nor does it work for everyone.If you are satisfied with the current results, then there is no need to do anything.If you are not satisfied, you might as well give it a try. Anyway, listen to the following true story from one of my former students, James Thomas: Once, six customers of a certain car company refused to pay the service fee.Not every customer refuses to pay the whole service charge, but everyone says that one of the accounts is wrong.But behind each service job on the form, there is a corresponding signature from the customer. Therefore, the company knows that the service job has been done, and they tell the customer that there is nothing wrong with the account and they should pay.

The following is the process of the company's loan department personnel going to ask customers for money. 1.They went to each customer individually and told him directly that they were there to collect an account that was long overdue. 2.They clearly tell customers that the company is absolutely right and the customer is absolutely wrong. 3.They reminded the customer that the company knew far more about cars than he did.So there's nothing to argue about at all. 4.Thus, the debate began. Obviously, this method cannot satisfy customers, let alone cost money.When things got to this point, the loan manager had no choice but to prepare for a lawsuit.Fortunately, the general manager of the company noticed this problem. After investigation, he found that these customers paid the bill quite happily and had a good reputation.The problem may be in the company's payment method.So he sent James Thomas to visit those customers to collect these "irrecoverable accounts".

Here's how Mr. Thomas used it: 1.I went to each client to collect that bill that was long overdue.We knew the bill was due, but I didn't say so directly.I explained to the customer that I had been ordered to investigate what the company had done and what had been overlooked. 2.I clearly tell the customer that I'm just here to listen and nothing else.I told him that the company didn't think it was absolutely right. 3.I tell the customer I'm very interested in his car, he knows his own car better than anyone else in the world, he's a real expert. 4.I try to get the customer to say that I listen with interest and sympathy, which suits him.

5.In the end, the customer was much more relaxed and I made him think the whole thing was fair.I found a good reason for him.I said, "First of all, I want you to know that I, too, do not think this was handled well. A representative of our company did not treat you well and caused you to be angry. I am very sorry about this incident , as a representative of the company, I sincerely apologize to you for this. After listening to your explanation carefully, I found that you are a fair and patient person. For this matter, you will do better than others Well, you know better too. Now, I want to ask you to do something for me. Here is your bill. I think it is best for me to ask you to give an estimate of this bill. I want to treat you as the chairman of our company, it’s up to you to decide, and you will be charged as much as you want.”

In the end, the customer generously paid the full amount of the bill, as did the other customers, except one who refused to pay for one of the items.But the rest is given.The bills ranged from $150 to $400 each.And within the next two years, all six customers bought new cars from Thomas' company. Finally, Thomas said: "I know from experience that before getting accurate information from a customer, the best way is to say that he is honest and fair, and let him think so, and he will actively and voluntarily repay the customer." Pay your debts. To put it in a perhaps clearer way, people in general want to be noble. There are very few exceptions to this rule, and I am sure that in most cases, of those who are cunning, It works better if you tell him you think he's honest and fair."