Chapter 8 no revenge

One evening a few years ago, I was visiting Yellowstone and sat on the patio with other tourists.Facing the dense forest, we look forward to seeing the emergence of the forest killer grizzly.Sure enough, that robust figure appeared, and it walked to the garbage discarded by the forest hotel to search for food.At this time, the forest ranger on horseback told us that the grizzly bear is almost invincible in the western United States, with the possible exception of the American bison and the Alaskan bear.But I found that only one small animal followed the grizzly out of the forest, and it was just a very smelly weasel.The Grizzly not only didn't slap it to ruin it, but tolerated it getting a piece of the pie, why would it?Because experience tells it, it is not cost-effective.

I also found this out.Growing up on a farm, I once caught a skunk by the fence as a kid.When I arrived in New York, I also encountered a few two-legged "skunks" on the street. Experience tells me that there are two situations that are not worth touching. If we harbor hatred for our enemy, it means that we have to pay more than the other party to break ourselves down, so that he can have a chance to control our sleep, appetite, blood pressure, health, and even mood.Our enemy would be delighted if he knew he was giving us such trouble!Hatred can't hurt the other person's hair, but it turns one's own life into a purgatory.There was a passage on the NYPD bulletin board: If a selfish person takes advantage of you, remove him from your friend list, never retaliate.Once you are revengeful, you will do yourself far more harm than anyone else.

Recently, a friend of mine had a severe heart attack, and the doctor told him to stay in bed and not get angry no matter what happened.Doctors know that people with heart failure may die when they get angry.A few years ago, in Spokane, Washington, the owner of a restaurant died of anger.I have a letter in front of me right now from Police Chief Jerry in Spokane, Washington.He said in the letter: "A few years ago, 68-year-old William Tricomber opened a small restaurant in Spokane. Because his chef insisted on drinking coffee from a saucer, he was mad at him. At that time, The proprietor of the diner was so annoyed that he grabbed a revolver and ran after the cook, only to collapse and die of a heart attack--while he was still clutching the pistol. The coroner reported: He Heart attack from anger."

In fact, when we hate our enemies, we give them the power to win.That force can affect our blood pressure, our appetite, our sleep, our health and our happiness.Our enemies would dance with joy if they knew how they worry us, annoy us, and fix us on revenge.In fact, the hatred in our hearts can't hurt them at all, but this hatred makes our life a hell. We must always remember: If a selfish person wants to take advantage of you, you should ignore him, let alone retaliate against him.When you try to get even with him, you hurt yourself far more than you hurt that guy.In fact, revenge hurts us in many ways.As stated above, revenge can damage your health. According to Life magazine, "The main characteristic of people with high blood pressure is that they are prone to anger. If the anger is not enough, long-term hypertension and heart disease will follow."

When you say "forgive 70 times 7 times" you are teaching us how to avoid high blood pressure, heart disease, stomach ulcers and many other diseases.Of course, I suppose, you know women, as I do, whose cheeks are lined with resentment, disfigured, even stiffened with remorse.No matter how they do beautification and how beautiful their appearance is, they cannot fill her heart with tenderness, tolerance and love. Resentment can even ruin our enjoyment of food.The sage said: "It is better to eat vegetables with love than to eat beef with resentment." We shall try to love our enemies.If we cannot love our enemies, we must at least love ourselves.We cannot allow enemies to control our health, our happiness, and our appearance.As Shakespeare said: "Don't burn yourself in a fire because of your enemies."

When Jesus said we should forgive our enemies "70 times seven times," He was also teaching us how to do business.An example of this is a letter from Jorona, who lives in Epsuna, Sweden.Jorona worked as a lawyer in Vienna for many years, and fled to Sweden during World War II, penniless and in desperate need of a job.Since he can speak and write several languages, he hopes to find a job as a secretary in an import and export company.But most of the companies wrote back and told him that they didn't need this kind of person because of the war, but they would keep his name on file.However, one man wrote back to Jorona saying: "You don't understand my business at all. You're stupid and stupid. I don't need anyone to write for me. If I did, I wouldn't ask you because You can't even write Swedish well, your letters are full of typos."

When Jorona saw the letter, he almost went mad with anger.Girona looked at the letter written by the Swede and thought: Your letter is full of mistakes, and you even wrote a letter saying that Jorona can't speak Swedish. What do you mean?So Girona wanted to write a letter too, which would make the man lose his temper.But he thought about it, and then said to himself: "Slow! How do I know that this person is wrong? I have studied Swedish, but it is not my mother tongue. Maybe I have made many mistakes that I don't know. Wrong. If what he says is true, then I will have to study harder to get a job. This man could do me a great favor, so I should write him a letter to thank him."

So Girona tore up the cursed letter he had just written, and wrote another.In the letter, he wrote: "It's very kind of you to write to me without trouble, especially since you don't need a secretary who writes for you. I made a mistake about your company's business, and I'm sorry I am very sorry. I am writing to you because I found out about you from someone who introduced you to me because he said you were a leader in the field. I did not know what was in my letter I made some grammatical mistakes and I am ashamed and sad about it. Now I plan to work harder on Swedish and correct my mistakes, thank you for helping me on the road to improvement."

A few days later, Jorona received a letter from the man asking him to come to him.Jorona went and got a job, and he was very happy.Since then, Jorona has understood that "a gentle answer can dispel anger". We may not be able to love our enemies like a saint, but for our own health and happiness, we must forgive them and forget them.It would be a wise move if we could do so. I often stand in Canada's Jasper National Park and look up at the mountain named after Edith Cavell, which may be the most beautiful mountain in the West.It commemorates a nurse who was shot by German firing squad on October 12, 1915.What crime has she committed?Because she housed and nursed many wounded British and French soldiers at her Belgian home and helped them flee to Holland.One morning that October, an English clergyman walked into her cell to offer her dying prayers.At that time, she said two immortal words that were later engraved on her monument: "I know that patriotism alone is not enough. I must not be hostile or resentful to anyone." The funeral ceremony was held in the temple cathedral.I spent a year in London and used to go to the National Portrait Gallery to look at the statue of Edith Cavell and read out these two immortal quotes from her: "I know that patriotism is not enough, I must not be hostile or resentful anyone."

I once asked Bernard Baruch (who was an adviser to six Presidents Wilson, Harding, Coolidge, Hoover, Roosevelt, and Truman) if he would be put off by an enemy attack. sad? “No one can humiliate me or interfere with me,” he replied, “and I won’t let them.” I also asked General Eisenhower’s son, John, if his father had always held a grudge.He replied, "No, my father never wastes a minute of him for someone he doesn't like." There is an old saying that goes well: "He who is not angry is a fool, and he who is not angry is wise." Schopenhauer, a great German philosopher and the author of "Pessimism", believes that life is a worthless adventure full of pain. When he walked through every moment of his life, his whole body seemed to be exuding pain, but In the depths of his desperation, "no one should hold a grudge against anyone if possible".

Of course, there is a very effective way to forgive and forget those who misunderstand and wrong us, and that is to make us do something absolutely beyond our ability, so that the insults and hostility we suffer become It doesn't matter anymore.Only in this way, we will not waste energy to care about things beyond our ideals. In 1918, a black lecturer, Lawrence Jones, was nearly burned to death in a dramatic incident in Mississippi Pine Woods.I went to a school founded by Lawrence Jones a few years ago and gave a speech to the students, now the school is known all over the country, but the following happened a long time ago . During World War I, a rumor circulated in central Mississippi that the Germans were instigating blacks to rebel.And the Lawrence Jones who was going to be burned to death was a black man, and he was accused of leading his family to rebel.But a large crowd of white people outside the church heard Lawrence Jones yelling to the crowd: "Life is a battle! Every Negro must wear armor and fight to survive and succeed." At that time, the emotions of ordinary people were easily impulsive. "Battle" and "Armor" are enough.So these young men rushed out in the night, gathered a large mob, returned to the church, took a rope, tied the missionary, dragged him a mile away, and made him stand on a great pile of dry wood. , and lit the pyre, and prepared to burn him with the fire and hang him at the same time. Just then a man cried out: "Before we burn him, we'll make this talkative man talk. Speak! Speak!" Standing on the pyre with a noose around his neck, Laurence Jones delivered a speech on his life and ideals.Lawrence Jones graduated from the University of Iowa in 1900. His innocent character and knowledge, as well as his talent in music, made all teachers and students like him very much. After college, Lawrence Jones turned down a hotel offer and an offer from a wealthy man to further his music studies.Why is this?Because he has very lofty ideals.When he finished reading the biography of Booker Washington, he decided to dedicate himself to the cause of education, to educate those among his people who were poor and uneducated.So, he returned to the poorest part of the South, a tiny place 25 miles south of Greyk, Mississippi.After pawning his watch for $1.65, he started his open-air school in the woods using tree stumps as tables. Lawrence Jones recounted his struggles to the angry men who were about to burn him.He told how some white people had helped him build the school and help him continue his educational career. Afterwards, Laurence Jones was asked if he would have hated those who had dragged him out to hang and burn him?He replied that he was too busy fulfilling his ideals to have time to hate others.He said: "I don't have time to fight with people, I don't have time to regret, and no one can force me to reduce myself to the point where I hate him." Lawrence Jones' attitude at the time was very sincere, and he did not beg for mercy for himself at all, which was touching.Some in the middle understood his ideals, and the thugs began to soften.A veteran of the American Civil War said: "I believe this kid is telling the truth. I know the white people he raises up, and he is doing good. We are wrong, and we should help him, not Hang him." The veteran then took off his hat and drove through the crowd, collecting $55.40 from those who were about to burn the educator, and handing it to a man who had said "I didn't Time to quarrel with others, I have no time to regret, and no one can compel me to reduce myself to hating him" - Lawrence Jones. Epictetus pointed out 1900 years ago that we will reap karma, no matter what, fate will always make us pay for our mistakes.At the end of the day, everyone pays for his mistakes.A person who can remember this will not be angry with anyone, will not quarrel with anyone, will not abuse others, scold others, violate others, and hate others. We must keep in mind a sentence in the Bible: "Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you; bless those who curse you; pray for those who abuse you." My father followed these words , It also gave him a peace of mind that ordinary officials and monarchs could not get.Don't waste time thinking about people we don't like, it will only hurt ourselves deeply. To develop inner peace and happiness, remember to: Never take revenge on your enemies, you will do yourself more harm than anyone else.