Chapter 12 Say as much as you know

Once, I went to attend a lecture given by a famous professor at the University of California.In class, he presented the results of his mouse experiments.At this time, a student suddenly raised his hand to ask a question, put forward his opinion, and asked the professor what would be the result of the experiment if he used another method to do it.All the audience looked at the professor, waiting to see how he would answer this experiment that he could never have done.In the end, the professor didn't rush, and said bluntly: "I haven't done this experiment, I don't know." When the professor finished saying "I don't know", there was prolonged applause from the audience.

Psychologist Benjamin Evitt once pointed out that those who usually say "I know" are not good at interacting with others and are not liked by others; while those who dare to say "I don't know" show a kind of An imaginative and creative spirit.Evitt also said that if we admit that we need to think about a problem or honestly admit our ignorance, then our own way of life can be greatly improved. That's the attitude he's trying to promote, and people can benefit from it. People don't like to put on a posture of pretending to understand, but they don't know that this is an effective way to express themselves, because frankness itself will give people a strong impression that you are honest and honest. You feel dependent.

When talking with people, you can talk about anything, but in the vast ocean of conversation topics that can be navigated everywhere, there are also some small reefs, which must be carefully avoided.Pretending to be an expert about something you don't know is a kind of self-deception.You can tell as much as you know. No one asks you to make an encyclopedia. Even the most learned person cannot know everything.Therefore, frankly admitting your ignorance and ignorance about certain things is by no means a shame. On the contrary, it will make others think that your conversation is worth referring to, without bragging, exaggeration, or hypocrisy.

Humility can get people's help more than shrewdness, and whispering is sometimes more successful than eloquence.The man hides behind his tongue. A man's ability is admirable, and if he is adorned with the virtue of modesty, it is simply admirable. boldly say "I don't know" In life, you can often meet a kind of people who are good teachers.They always like to point out that what others have done is inappropriate, and what they have done is not good enough. It seems that he is good at everything and can make a reason for everything.This kind of conceit happens to be the tortuous expression of inferiority complex.The reason why they put on a "know-it-all" face is that they are afraid of being looked down upon.The purpose of their showing off is to improve their status, but the result of doing so makes them more stretched and hated by others.The reason is simple, if you don't believe in other people's ability to do good things, others won't take your ability seriously.

This kind of person always thinks that he is smart, knowledgeable and experienced, and can be a teacher to others, and if he cannot tell others or teach others about his experience, he will feel uncomfortable and uncomfortable.Because you don't point fingers at people, how can your own "knowledge" and "experience" appear in front of people?How to win the praise and admiration of others? Knowledge is inexhaustible, and no matter how much one person knows, it is impossible to exhaust it.In one aspect you can be a teacher, but in another aspect you can only be a student.Therefore, "a good teacher" should not be "good" first, but must be able to be both a teacher and a student.At the same time, even if you can "be a teacher" in one aspect, it depends on whether others are willing to learn.If people are "weary of learning" and don't want to be taught by you at all, then why bother to make noise and make noise?Experience will not deteriorate in the stomach of a person. You can teach those who can accept it, but you don’t have to speak to those who cannot accept it.Concentrate your temperament and maintain a calm demeanor, and you will naturally be respected by people.

At a dinner party given by the wife of a famous cook, Mr. Brown noticed that the hostess looked unnatural when talking with the hostess and another male guest. Suddenly, the hostess pointed to a black metal utensil on the table - it looked like a kind of electric barbecue grill - and said: "This special tool is used to make 'hot cheese', you know 'hot cheese' 'What's the matter?" Just as Mr. Brown was about to say he knew, the male guest exclaimed: "Really, I don't know at all. What is 'Hot Cheese'? Is it a new way to eat steak?" Hearing these words, the hostess smiled.She made a detailed introduction to the guests, and gradually became beaming.

After hearing this, Mr. Brown suddenly realized that "eating cheese hot" is not a kind of cheese sandwich as he thought, but a way of eating cheese fondue.This experience has benefited Mr. Brown a lot: not only has he clarified the true face of a thing he thought he knew, but more importantly, Mr. Brown has seen a major shortcoming in himself, which is that he thinks he knows everything. Talking to people with a learning mindset not only shows your humility, but you can indeed learn a lot.Most people have a psychological need to "be a good teacher", and they will welcome you as a "student".