Chapter 11 Learn to listen and be a loyal listener

In the social arena, you can often see a friend of yours chatting enthusiastically with another person you don't know. At this time, you may have the idea of ​​​​joining their conversation. Because you don't know what the topic they are talking about, and if you join in suddenly, it may make them feel unnatural, and the topic may not be continued.To make matters worse, maybe they are in the middle of a major negotiation, but because you joined them so that they can no longer focus and inadvertently lost the deal; At this critical moment, perhaps because of your intervention, the solution that is beneficial to them will fail, and the atmosphere will turn into embarrassment and cannot be handled later.At this time, everyone will think that you are impolite, and may hate you, which will lead to your social failure.

Suppose a person is talking enthusiastically, and you suddenly interrupt: "Hey, is this what you saw yesterday?" The person who is speaking will definitely not like you because you interrupted him. Others won't like you either. Many people who are not polite always rush in halfway when others are talking about something they are happy about, so that others are caught off guard and have to quiet down and stop talking.This kind of person will not tell you in advance that he is going to interject.When he interjects, sometimes he doesn't care what you say, and shifts the topic to the aspects he is interested in. Sometimes he will speak your conclusion instead, so as to proudly show off his eloquence.In either case, there is a sudden sense of disgust in the speaker, because someone who interrupts someone casually has no respect for others.

Many people are good at talking and take pride in it.In order to get others to agree with them, they go on and on and on, leaving no room for others to speak at all.In particular, some salesmen are most likely to make this mistake, blindly boasting to customers how good their products are, so that customers have no room to intervene. In fact, this is the most wrong thing.The customer chooses the goods only when he has the intention of buying them. He criticizes these goods without arguing with them. After he chooses them, he will buy them naturally.If you argue with him, it's like accusing the customer of being blind and ignorant of good and bad.If the customer is insulted by this, he must have gone to another place. Wouldn't he lose a lot of business in vain?

Therefore, when someone is speaking, if you disagree with something, you should wait until the other person has finished speaking, and you must not intervene or stop others. Blocking others is actually the biggest mistake.Because when others still have a lot to say, they will never accept your opinion, nor will they listen to you at all.So we should encourage others to express their opinions and listen patiently to what others have to say. In the waiting hall, Punk was concentrating on his study, when suddenly the voice of an old lady came from the next seat: "I dare say Chicago must be very cold now."

"Probably so," Punk replied casually. "I haven't been to Chicago in almost three years," said the old lady. "My son lives there." "Very good." Punk said without looking up. "My husband's body is on this plane. We've been married for 53 years. You know, I don't drive. A nun drove me from the hospital when he died. We weren't even religious. Funeral The host sent me to the airport." The old lady said sadly. At this moment, Punk felt how disgusting his behavior of ignoring the old lady just now was, and he finally understood that there was a person beside him who was eager for others to listen to her.In a desperate attempt, she turns to a cold stranger who is more interested in reading.

All she needs is an audience, no advice, no teaching, no money, no help, no judgment, not even sympathy, just begging for a minute or two to listen to her. Punk stopped reading and listened attentively to the old lady.The old lady spoke slowly until they boarded the plane. It seems so contradictory: In a society with advanced communication equipment, people suffer from being unable to communicate and find an audience.The old lady found her seat on the other side of the cabin.As Punk hung up his coat, he heard the old lady say to her neighbor in a mournful voice, "I bet it's cold in Chicago right now."

Punk prayed in his heart: "God, I hope someone will listen to her." People will have a desire to talk, if someone is chattering to you, listening patiently is the greatest respect for others. When others are speaking, if you disagree with something, you should wait for others to finish speaking, and you must not intervene or stop them.Encourage others to express their opinions and listen patiently to what others have to say.