Chapter 15 2. How to say the words

So should we say good things, or should we say good things?This has to be analyzed on a case-by-case basis. If it’s between friends, it’s better to be open and honest, because you are equal, and you don’t need to follow the other, and true close friends don’t care about those formal things.If it is to the superior, then pay attention to the way of speaking.This is not to let you learn to flatter, but to let you grasp a certain degree, because what you are facing is a person who will not be much different from you in emotional changes, and is even more cautious than you to a certain extent. The leader has less face than you, so he cares more about talking.

Speaking is actually an art, and a great one at that.Why do you say that?For example, it is also talking, drama is an art form, and quarreling is the essence of life.If quarreling on stage is like quarreling in real life, then you can just perform with your wife at home, why spend money to listen to them?The same is true for the leader. You and him are in a working relationship. This job is your stage, and the dialogue between you and him is a stage performance. It must not be too life-like. The most typical dialogue between subordinates and superiors is the ancient persuasion and remonstrance.This persuasion can actually explain the essence of the problem.Persuasion requires a process of speaking and the method of persuasion; accepting requires a process of listening and a certain mind.These two processes are developing according to the normal trend, and this persuasion will be merged and successful.In other words, things are actually not that simple. On the one hand, the wisdom of the courtiers is tested; on the other hand, the heart of the king is tested.This places demands on both parties.

People have different tempers and temperaments, and as leaders, they have different hearts and minds.Busy work coupled with a good sense of self, squinting at people with upturned nostrils, or indifference and indifference, reflect what we often call bureaucracy.So it is actually not easy to give them suggestions and get them adopted smoothly. There is a problem of skill.If the leader likes and appreciates the subordinate very much, the subordinate will speak more casually.Throughout the ages, nothing has done better in this respect than Tang Taizong and Wei Zheng.Li Shimin likes to listen to what Wei Zheng said, and it is easy to accept it psychologically, and it may not be feasible to change someone.But even Wei Zheng, he shouldn't be too outrageous in his words, and he has to be careful, yelling loudly like a buddy is not enough.The majesty of the king still needs the respect and submissiveness of the courtiers to reflect and help.

In fact, even Wei Zheng didn't invite Li Shimin to see him at first, did he?Rome was not built in a day, and the two of them finally developed a tacit understanding after repeated running-in.This process can only be completed through the joint efforts of both parties.Specific to Liu Bang and Xiang Yu, these two also have the experience of accepting advice and being persuaded by others, from which we can see the problem of method.