Chapter 13 Chapter 14 A woman sometimes becomes a turning point in a man's life

——After the story is told, we can get married Interview time: December 27, 1997 at 10:00AM Interview location: "Beijing Youth Daily · Youth Weekly" office Name: Lin Jun Gender: Female Age: 24 years old Graduated from a foreign language college with a bachelor's degree, and now works as an interpreter in a certain agency. We will be very happy together, and he is also the one who hurt me the most - his relationship was very chaotic in the past two years or so - he has many women with him, and some he even wants to name I can’t get up, I still don’t remember who it is—two people in a marriage can’t just be husband and wife, everyone plays a multi-faceted role, sometimes they are parents, sometimes they are brothers and sisters, sometimes they are friends— ——I also have a lot of things wrong. For a long time, I was also getting along with two people at the same time, which is also immoral——He did give me a sense of crisis. Even if I marry him, my heart may never let go Come down, the sense of security is very weak.But because of this, I also feel that no matter where or with whom, some similar stories will happen.

On December 24, 1997, Lin Yun's name appeared on my pager. The sound of the pager indicated that he was a man, and the message was related to "oral memorandum".When I called back, it was indeed a male voice: "My colleague wants to talk to you. I don't know if you are willing or not. Her name is Lin Jun, and she is a girl. Her experience is similar to those you wrote about." Place." I was surprised that such calls are usually made by the interviewees themselves, and usually they feel whether I can be trusted on the phone, and the first condition of this feeling is that they must listen to my voice.I guess she can ask a colleague to make this call for her. There are only two possibilities. One is that the relationship between this colleague and her is extraordinary, and the other is that her experience no longer needs to be concealed from others.

I asked: "Why doesn't she find me by herself?" The other party said: "It is not convenient for her to call now. If you can, tell me how to find you, and I will let her contact you." So I gave out my pager No. About 20 minutes later, Lin Jun's name appeared on my pager again, and when I called back, it was a crisp female voice: "I want to make an appointment with you, I have a lot to say, and I will only talk after I finish talking." Maybe marriage." I said yes right away.To be precise, this is contrary to the usual working method of "oral memorandum". Usually, I have to ask volunteer interviewees to briefly introduce their general situation on the phone before deciding whether to meet, mainly to avoid repetition of topics.But this girl is different. Her asking a colleague to call on her behalf has made me very interested in her, and my intuition tells me that this should be a person with some characteristics.

December 27, 1997 was a Saturday, and Lin Yun came to the newspaper office after 10 o'clock.She wore a well-fitting black coat, black trousers, and small black leather boots of good texture. This color made her face look very pale, so white that there was hardly a trace of rosiness, and the hair hanging on her shoulders was not too much. Dense, with a faint golden glow in the sunlight pouring into the room.She said: "Hi, I'm Lin Jun. Sorry for being late." It's hard for me to connect that peculiar way of connection with this young and lovely girl in front of me.If I was walking on the street and ran into her head-on, maybe I would look back at her a few more times because of the beauty flowing out of her body.

The conversation with Lin Yun is different from the past. She seems very unaccustomed to narrating an event or a process in an orderly and complete way. I have to interrupt her or remind her in many places.Her narrative is a bit messy. how to say?Most people talk to others as a form of communication. It’s not like me to state something by myself, and I have no experience in this field, so there will definitely be some omissions when I say it, and you may have to mention many places. question.I can answer more precisely. I told Lin Yun the same thing I said to the interviewee every time: "I don't need you to make any preparations, you just need to speak in the way you think is most suitable, appropriate and convenient. I hope you don't Make an edit in my mind first, and present me with the complete facts as much as possible, so as not to affect the judgment and analysis we will make together." Lin Qiao understood what I meant very well, and she nodded with a smile.I found her smile a kind of generosity and understanding that is not often seen among 24-year-old girls.

That's all I can say roughly.Now I don't seem to know exactly what I want to express, for example, the content of my life with my current boyfriend, or my overall view on choosing a boyfriend.I don't think I have thought much about these things, so I'll just talk about them in such a chronological order. My current boyfriend is my third boyfriend, and I think I will marry him in the spring of next year.But how?He makes me feel very good, we will be very happy together, and at the same time he is the one who hurt me deeply.I didn't meet him the way it was love at first sight, I don't really believe in that.When I was in college, my criteria for choosing a boyfriend was that I thought he would have a future, and that he would be more compatible with me and help each other in our careers in the future.I talked about two boys in school. At that time, they were students, so they tended to be a little childish. They would have conflicts over a trivial matter, and the quarrels were particularly fierce. I didn’t think that sometimes quarreling would also change the relationship. It gets more and more intense, and at the end of the quarrel, each other will be very tired. For example, if you know how to control it at the time, you may be able to continue, but no one restrains yourself. Slowly cultivated feelings always seem to be not so stable.The second boyfriend I talked about belonged to Dai Pei, which means that his future destination is the army, and I am the same.He used to go home with me, and my parents have seen him too. My home is in Urumqi, Xinjiang, and they think this kid is not bad. The two of us always quarrel, and we can't break up after the quarrel.He graduated a year earlier than me, and he went to military training immediately after graduation, so there is no other way between us but correspondence.Oh, I forgot to tell you, I am a foreign language student, and I will go to university for five years.The relationship between the two of them was not very good when they were separated, and then it was more difficult to communicate through communication.

That's when I met my current boyfriend.It was also a coincidence to meet him, we met at the dance at Peking University.He graduated long ago, much older than me, about five or six years old, and he graduated in the year I was in college.He is the kind of person who looks very ordinary in appearance, is not tall, and looks very ordinary... But after getting in touch with him slowly, I found that he has a kind of life... It is a way of life that I appreciate more. , I can't quite describe what it is. Lin Yun was thinking and talking, as if her language couldn't keep up with her thoughts, she always thought that she couldn't find an accurate word to tell me, what exactly did her "current boyfriend" give her at the beginning? What a feeling.She smiled apologetically.I think she looks really cute when she's thinking and talking.

It was during my second boyfriend's military training that my relationship with this person developed rapidly. It was at the end of 1995, and I was about to graduate.At that time, my second boyfriend was in Shanxi for military training. After all, that place was not as good as Beijing. He also kept expressing in his letters that he missed life in Beijing very much, so I was afraid of affecting him, so I didn't tell him about the changes in my side.I still had some traditional ideas at the time. I thought I should still be with my second boyfriend. We had also discussed getting married, and we were both in the army and learning foreign languages, so that future marriages could be Very strong.So I just said to my current boyfriend that we can get along very well, but it is impossible to get married.

Regarding this person, I have known him intermittently in the past two years.Maybe it has something to do with his experience. He only talked about his first girlfriend after graduating from college.He thinks that there are four of the opposite sex who can be counted as his girlfriend.His relationship was pretty messed up for almost two years before mine.When he talked about his first girlfriend, it might be because both of them were first loves, and they invested a lot, but the two of them were not very suitable. They wanted to separate several times but didn't have a share. He committed suicide several times, but never succeeded.So both of them felt quite tired and there was no way to continue.This time it was a big blow to him, and after that he talked about the second, third, and fourth.His second girlfriend is a girl who just divorced. The two of them live together, but in his words, "two people help each other to live together". Every day after get off work, they go home and cook together, and eat together when the meal is ready. , not to mention any deep feelings.how to say?It's the feeling of two people being together forever, you understand?They are very dependent on each other, but there is no particularly deep relationship.That girl had another boyfriend, because they didn't even think about getting married, they just lived together.Later, the three of them didn't know whose birthday it was, so they lived together.The three of them are actually very "bright" about what's going on.The boy didn't leave that night.He ended up sleeping in the outhouse, and the girl and the new boy lived in the back room, and he didn't feel it, that's all.Of course, he felt a little uncomfortable. It was because the boy's self-esteem was a little bit low, and he didn't feel that his beloved was taken away by others.The third is because the girl has been with his former boyfriend for about 8 years, that is to say, it has been a long time, and she followed my boyfriend again, but he used to be that boy who always begged her, and she herself felt that there was a relationship between them. There seems to be no principled conflict between them, and my boyfriend also persuaded them to reunite, so they slowly separated.The fourth girl is the kind of person whose family is not in Beijing who is very capable, treats him very well, and takes good care of him in life, but he doesn't like it because he feels that girl is always forcing him to get married. Yes, it seemed that as long as the two parties felt a little suitable, they had to get married immediately, and immediately asked him to meet her parents, which frightened him.Because he didn't want to get married early, the girl chased him too closely, and the two of them were not very harmonious in those things, so they separated in the end.During that time, he changed a lot of jobs, and he could not be said to be stable in all aspects.There are many women who have been with him, some of whom he can't even remember their names, and he still doesn't remember who they are.

There was no trace of complaint or resentment that women usually show when describing similar incidents on Lin Yun's face, she was very calm.When I asked her if the so-called "intercourse" meant that he had sexual relations with those women, she also calmly said "yes". He is now stable both professionally and emotionally.Perhaps because of the previous experience, I think his mentality may have become very strange, that is, nothing can move him any more, making him feel that he can live with a girl for the rest of his life, he becomes very indifferent, and his feelings become as if ...has shrunk, because he has also experienced the kind of love that seems to be life and death, and there is no result, so...his heart has become very gray.Then he met me. At that time, his playful mentality hadn't faded down. In this way, even though I told him to be my lover, he didn't think there was anything wrong. He didn't expect to be with me. How about it, even if it is a lover, he thinks it may not be too long, I may just be his girlfriend who passed away, and he also thinks that I will not have anything with him in the end.

Lin Jun's eyes are very bright, and I even found that the pure light shining from it can make many people who claim to be tolerant feel ashamed.But at the same time, I am also asking myself: Does all acceptance mean recognition, does all tolerance contain enough rationality and thinking, does a person's confirmation of his own state and position also contain a kind of Maybe I didn't realize it, out of habitual inertia or numbness, I didn't ask Lin Yun such a question. For a girl who is going to get married, asking this kind of question is cruel and inappropriate. Later in our contact, I felt more and more good about him, and he also felt more and more good about me. But at that time, I had a boyfriend who was in military training in other places. I didn't understand what to say to him, but he also understood in his heart.Then my boyfriend... Here I interrupt Lin Yun, her "boyfriend" is a bit confusing.We finally decided to use "second boyfriend" to refer to the boy who went to military training, and add "my boyfriend" to the person she is now planning to marry.for narrative For convenience, Lin Yun told me their names respectively, but we all know that these two names will never appear in this text. It was my second boyfriend who returned to Beijing, but I was also very uncomfortable because my relationship with my boyfriend was getting better and better.Speaking of this, Lin Jun hesitated a little, she seemed to be waiting for me to ask her something.I think she must not know how to tell me what this "better and better" refers to.I reminded her that she should tell me what kind of specific relationship she had with these two people. I had that kind of relationship with my second boyfriend. Later, when he went to military training, it was impossible to have another relationship. During this time, I also had this kind of relationship with my boyfriend.I don't think they are the same.I don't think there is anything wrong with his previous actions. On the contrary, I think this boy is a legend. Of course, it seems to me that his thinking at that time may be a little naive.I didn't think about pursuing his previous experiences, and I didn't think those experiences were bad or wrong. I don't think so, and from another perspective, he must have his strengths.As for my second boyfriend, he is very kind to me, but I always feel that he and I are too young to be together.He was only two years older than me, and he couldn't really take care of me or be considerate of me at all.My current boyfriend is much older than me and has rich experience in all aspects, so he knows what I need and takes good care of me.I think that two people in a marriage cannot be just husband and wife. Everyone plays a multifaceted role, sometimes as parents, sometimes as siblings, and sometimes as friends.My current boyfriend is like that.And I am also particularly touched by his professionalism.It may also be because his own love life is particularly chaotic, and he diverted all his energy to his career.Now he is running his own company.He could want almost nothing but his career.For example, if he is very ill, he will insist on going to work. Although he is the boss, he does everything as if he is leading the way.I think such boys are promising.If boys take their feelings too seriously, I look down on them a little bit.My original two boyfriends were like that, which made me feel a little worthless. On New Year's Day in 1996, I had to take an exam.We agreed not to see each other for a week.Three days later, I felt that I still wanted to see him very much, so I went to him without contacting him beforehand.It was late, and I arrived at the house he was renting.Knock on the door, but no one is in the house.At this time the landlord came out and knew me.At first the landlord didn't say anything, but later he said it out while chatting, saying that he recently brought a girl back, and the two of them had been living together for a few days.I thought it was weird, it was almost impossible, I couldn't imagine another girl between him and me.I just asked the landlord what the girl was like, and the landlord described it a bit like a girl I had seen, and I had only seen her once.The girl was very close to the other boy when they met.I don't think he would bring his good friend's girl back no matter what, didn't he say "friend's wife, don't bully her"?I was a little skeptical at the time but didn't think too much about it.I asked the landlord to open the door, but the landlord told me not to let me say that she told me, then left, and I waited alone in the room.I found some women's cosmetics and clothes and stuff, obviously someone lived here.I also thought at the time, maybe the girl had no place to live, so he gave up his place... There is only one single bed here, and then I thought, even if we live together, nothing will happen... I lay I couldn't sleep in bed, I felt very cold, it was winter.After about an hour or two like this, I heard two people walking over talking and laughing outside, and then opened the door.I turned on a desk lamp, and the light was very dim, and there was no light in the house from the outside.When they entered, they found a person lying in the room. The girl screamed out in fright, and my boyfriend stood there in a daze.I saw them too, and I was shaking all over, but I just couldn't speak.I thought everyone was embarrassed, so I pretended to be woken up.The girl reacted very quickly, she called my boyfriend right away: "Hurry up and get me something, XXX is still waiting for me outside." It was as if she just came back with him to get something.In this way, the girl took some things and left. My boyfriend sent her to the intersection to take a taxi and didn't come back for a long time.I will ask him when he comes back.I asked calmly, because I'm not the kind of person who would argue with him endlessly when I'm angry. As for him, no matter how bad things he did, he never told lies.He told me that everything that was supposed to happen between them happened.I asked why.He told the story of this girl.He had known this girl two years before he knew me, and it had been good for a while, but it was fine because she had a boyfriend.The girl said to get rid of those and come back to him.They have not been in touch for two years, and the words they have said to each other have become indifferent.I haven't been here for a few days. I don't know where the girl found his address, so she came to him with a big suitcase.In order to separate from her boyfriend, she lost hundreds of thousands of yuan, and her parents were not in Beijing, so she was completely homeless.She said it because of that sentence back then.Later, she saw my photo on the table, and she picked up the suitcase and was about to go to the train station.My boyfriend did have a crush on her and couldn't bear to let her go like this.That's it... Of course I'm sad, but I don't know what to say.Speaking from my experience, no one has ever treated me like this.It may be a very common thing for others, but it happened to me, and I couldn't stand it.I have always been very confident in these areas, and he hurt my self-esteem very much.But he thinks that I have nothing more than a lover relationship with him, and I have no reason to ask him not to find someone else.He also made sense, because at the time I hadn't separated from my second boyfriend.The three of them faced each other that day and didn't make it clear who was related to whom. The girl left in the middle of the night just because I was there. She must have been hurt too. I don't know where I went alone.Then he made a choice for me to stay. That girl is done with him.I don't know if I should finish with him too. Lin Jun looked up at me, with a little cloudiness in his eyes. There were no classes in school at that time.My endurance is very poor.I didn't eat or feel hungry for about 5 days because of this.I don't understand how people can stand it.But probably I can't do without him, so after much deliberation, I still didn't choose to give up, and I was still with him, but I felt very uncomfortable.At this time, my second boyfriend returned to Beijing after his military training.I don't think we're a good fit.I proposed to break up, but after all... I can't separate for a while. After going through this with my current boyfriend, I feel that there are many things wrong with me. For a long time, I also get along with two people at the same time, which is also immoral.So he has his reasons for doing that, and he has his reasons for not doing well.That's it.Some things in my heart settled down, and I already knew that I was not very independent and could leave him very much.In the summer of 1996, my second boyfriend and I finally separated. We are single at this time, so let's get engaged.Because after that, I will go to military training for three months, and I can get married when I come back. Lin Yun's expression began to become a little fuzzy. She seemed to be lost in memory, and she seemed to be trying to tell me these intricate facts accurately.I thought this was probably a critical passage, so I said to her: "Speak slowly, and say what you want. You may gain new understanding after thinking about it and saying it for yourself." She nodded slightly , Reconnecting with the original words, speaking very slowly. I was in Shanxi during my military training. At the beginning, we wrote frequently, and he often bought me such and such things. Everyone who trained with me knew that he was very kind to me.The first two months passed like this, and when I was about to come back, I found that there was something wrong with him whether he was calling or anything else. I don’t know if I was suspicious, but I knew it must have happened on his side. something, but he won't tell me.I didn't ask either.After returning to Beijing, I went to his place one day.He had moved into the building by then.he is not here.There is a single bed in that room, and a set of corner sofas opposite.I find it strange that his alarm clock is not on the bed but on the couch.So it means that he slept on the sofa the night before, so who slept on the bed?So I reasoned that someone must have spent the night here the night before.I'm not sure if it's male or female.It's impossible for me to think about the people around him.I'll ask him when he comes back.He was very surprised, why did he suddenly ask this, and he didn't know where I knew it.And so he told a long story. ...He said it was a girl I knew.I thought of a friend of mine who was assigned to Beijing from Shaanxi, because I felt that there would be stories between them very early on.It didn't occur to me that I was actually thinking right. Lin Jun sighed for a long time here, as if very tired. To be honest, remembering these is quite tiring. ...He let me hear the story again.The first time he did this, if it was because I was with two people at the same time and had no commitment to him, I have nothing to say that the two were even, but this time we are engaged anyway, and everything has been discussed When did he get married, the blueprint for the future has been drawn, now what does it mean that he brought another girl?I really didn't know how to find an excuse for myself to allow us to continue this relationship.He also felt that he did a poor job. He didn't say anything like asking me to forgive him, because he knew he was not qualified to say these things, so he said that everything was up to me, and he had no other choice if we broke up.But he told me that as I saw it, he was done with that girl too, they had separated the night before.I analyze it now because he was too messy before, and that kind of inertia has continued. When he sees a beautiful girl or a girl with a good personality, he will be attracted by others, and he will not be particularly self-controlled. He lacks a sense of responsibility.This time it was my good friend, as if I had led a wolf into the house.He told me about their beginning and end, and I felt like there was something wrong with both of them.But it was mostly his problem at first, and he flirted with the girl.That person happened to be very relaxed. I was not in Beijing, and none of them thought of my existence. The two of them were the kind of dry wood.My boyfriend said that the girl's personality is very attractive to him, she is very talkative and outgoing.But at the same time, he also found that this kind of girl is very destructive. For example, if there is a small matter that he disagrees with, he will make a fuss until he doesn't sleep all night. Work is not good either.The girl called him when he was at work and said that if he didn't come back, he would never find her again, and he had to come back immediately, otherwise she would really do something stupid.She's the kind of person who is very emotional and my boyfriend just can't get enough of it.During my military training, he didn’t tell me because he was afraid of affecting my emotions. He originally wanted to break up with me, and he knew he was immoral.But when I returned to Beijing, the first time he saw me, he felt that he couldn't say anything, and he was also very conflicted, so he decided to separate from both of them and spend a quiet time by himself.As for me, after having the first experience, I seem to be able to withstand a lot, and I feel very uncomfortable, but this kind of thing is not particularly hurting me, no matter in terms of depth or anything else, it is not as good as the first time. Makes me feel overwhelmed.After he said this, I felt a little relieved. In fact, I just wanted to find out what was going on with them.I was a little dizzy at the time, so I just broke up with him and let it go, even if I published a newspaper to ask for marriage, I even prepared the manuscript.My friend said that the form of marriage proposal is not good, I don't know what to do, like a headless fly.At this time, my boyfriend also fought for me from various aspects. He didn't dare to ask for my forgiveness, even though he thought it was better for me.In the middle, he was confused or was still playing, but in the final analysis, we are the two of us who are the most suitable.I even told him that if there is a good boy to introduce to me, I will try it too.There was such a joke between us.He even thinks that he is not suitable for marriage, so he just lives like this for the rest of his life. Lin Jun smiled, and there was a touch of red on her face, maybe it was because the room was very hot. We still haven't separated in the end.After more than a year now, I feel that my mentality has calmed down a lot, and I don't feel any fear or hurt.If I told you this more than a year ago, I might have cried, but now I can handle it all.The reason why I came to tell you is that I hope that I will not forget these things, and I hope that he will not forget either.He did give me a sense of crisis. Even if I marry him, maybe my heart will never let go, but the sense of security is very weak.But because of this, I also feel that no matter where or with whom, some similar stories will happen, so the most important thing is the inclusiveness of people.I think I've matured a bit.Moreover, I no longer demand that specific purity.Sometimes I think that contractual marriage also has its rationality. If the life is good, the contract can be renewed. If the life is not good, the contract can be terminated. ...Maybe I'm talking too messy, but that's pretty much the whole story. Lin Jun leaned back on the chair as if relieved, breathed a sigh of relief, with a faint smile on his face.She said they are now "getting better" again, and she has full confidence and hope for the marriage that will form.However, what I can't understand is why a woman's strong demand for a sense of security is reflected in her seemingly noble trust and tolerance.I finally asked her whether this confidence arose from inseparable love or from the habit of not giving up, from a lack of confidence in new choices or from a general pessimism about the virtues of the opposite sex.I think Lin Yun is a girl who is very resilient psychologically, and she has the ability to face these problems.When expressing these, Lin Jun seemed a little strenuous and impatient, a bit like desperately trying to justify himself. Actually my second mistake with him was not a surprise to me.I feel that no matter a man or a woman, they are likely to be tempted by all kinds of temptations in social life. For example, sometimes when I walk on the road, I will be attracted by a boy who is very handsome, but we will pass by each other.Then if this kind of temptation has the opportunity to meet, and the other party becomes an audience when you go to get off work together, get off work or are in a bad mood, then maybe there will be development.I think everyone has this possibility.But I will look at it objectively, even if there is an overreach, I think it is normal, it does not mean that the spirit is not pure, it does not mean that I gave all my feelings to that person.As for me and my boyfriend, to be honest, I am quite unfortunate, and he also thinks he is very wrong, and if he makes the same mistake again, it means that he has no feelings at all.But I believe that some people may never be tempted in their whole life, and some people just fall in the same place. This is not absolute.So I am still optimistic about our marriage and I am willing to marry him.I even think that we are helping each other in terms of feelings and outlook on life, and we are moving towards a more perfect humanity together.And I have always believed that crisis is universal, and it is the same whoever you marry.I think it is better for such things to happen before marriage than after marriage, at least I have learned how to face them.After thinking about it, he has almost no shortcomings that I can find out except for these two things, so maybe I will have no chance to find such an excellent person after leaving him. There are many objective reasons, such as career .Family, upbringing, and more are complicated.I have been satisfied with the kind of care he gave me.Sometimes I think, why can't I simply look at his mistakes?For example, when I went to the market to buy vegetables, and ended up buying eggs, why did I have to link these with spiritual loyalty or disloyalty?I think he's still leaning toward me emotionally, even though his lack of self-denial has jeopardized our relationship.I don't think I need to combine these things with so many things to negate my choice. Why must I treat these things as unforgivable sins?Some girls fall in love with him, which means that he is good, as long as he doesn't love those girls, he won't pose a threat to me. Of course, if he also loves others, then there is no need for me to exist. I can't guarantee that similar things won't happen in the future, but I won't stop going to the future because of bad possibilities, I'm actually prepared with both hands.But I've had this experience, and I know how to run the marriage without it becoming dull, so I think about it in a positive way.Our understanding in this regard is very unified.Including today when I came to you, he knows that he sent me here, and he also thinks it would be better for me to talk to someone, and how should I express it.He might not have had a good image in the story I'm telling, and he's okay with that, because he, too, thinks he's not doing it right.He was never the type to lie, so for a while he was miserable too.He is the kind of person who dares to face himself, which is why I can't give up. There are indeed many, many things in human nature that are not so beautiful, but I have to face it, so I think we grow together emotionally.I'm not as simple as I used to be, and I've become very tolerant.In fact, every marriage has a sense of crisis, which comes from all directions. It may not be a bad thing if you have a mentality of being ready at all times like me. At about 12 o'clock, the tape ran out and Lin Jun's story was finished.She made a phone call to the person he was going to marry: "I'm almost finished, come on, it'll be done in ten minutes." While waiting for her fiancé to pick her up, she talked about her second boyfriend: "When my father passed away, he called me. He actually wanted to ask me if it was possible, but I There is no such mood at all, and indeed there is no such possibility. In the end, he said that I ruined his life. After I returned to Beijing, I found out that he was married. The girl is from Beijing. They live at the home of his parents-in-law. He told his current wife about his experience with me, so she didn’t even know that there was such a person as me. Now he is taking his wife abroad. I think he might live a normal married life, then Possibly a very good day too. A woman can be a turning point for a man sometimes, and of course it doesn't happen all the time, but it's there anyway." So who is the turning point for Lin Yun and her fiancé?I didn't ask.He just watched her get into his car and drive away.