Chapter 12 The third part 1. Ten years of wind and rain

Seven years ago, I wrote an article "Who Says the Plants Are Not Compassionate", in which I wrote about the persimmon and pear trees in this courtyard.Especially the pear tree that was saved by Guanhua.I have a lot of affection for these two trees!Later, the large branch of the persimmon tree hanging outside our bedroom window inexplicably withered and broke.Since this branch bears fruit, no matter what year it is, it always bears a pair of huge persimmons, from green to orange red, hanging in front of the window.Guanhua regarded it as a treasure, and no one was allowed to touch it. He didn't pick it off until it was ripe, and he would hang it by the bedside for a few days.He didn't agree to eat them one by one until I said that if I didn't eat them, they would fall and the soft persimmons would rot on the bed.

Looking into the courtyard from the living room, I somehow suddenly realized that the most beautiful thing in this courtyard that I have lived in for thirty-three years is the two big banyan trees in the front yard.Each year they bloom late, but the pink wispy blooms last for as long as two months.During the day, the pink cloud brings coolness and softness to the hot summer.At night, thousands of flowers exude the fragrance and warmth of the courtyard.That sweet scent is reminiscent of the purest love.It is not so strong, but so elegant, so long-lasting, so unforgettable. Looking for a long time at the banyan tree flowers that diffused from the roof of the south house, I suddenly became sad.Why didn't I realize that these two trees had grown two or three stories from the roof?I remember that twelve or thirteen years ago, they had just grown about one meter from the roof of the southern house.Guanhua and I sat on the porch in the backyard, looking at the banyan flower protruding from the roof, he said: "Look how beautiful this banyan tree is walking along the roof! It looks like a dragon. The cluster of flowers in the east forms a The dragon's head is undulating in the middle, and the west side is the dragon's tail. This dragon is a young girl. Everything in nature is incredible!" Since then, I have always looked at this pink mythical dragon every summer. dragon.Later, I don't know when, I stopped looking for it, because I couldn't bear the pain and torture of memories, I had to break free from this loss and face life again.

So, I suddenly found that the banyan tree had become two big trees.The originally slender and graceful pink dragon has also changed from a young girl to a vigorous old dragon. It no longer winds on the roof of the south house, but perches high on a pink ridge, overlooking This vicissitudes of life also overlooks the changes in this small courtyard.I can't help crying.How many times I tried to become a strong person in life, and how many guests laughed.But how many people know the deep sorrow behind this laughter.I can't tell whether I succeeded or failed.Maybe life itself does not matter success or failure, so why should I pursue it so hard? !But I have a precious memory, even the pain of the past. When that page became history, the heart covered with trauma realized that what is really precious is that I was fortunate enough to experience a period of epic life that made me mature today. You can face historical contemplation.

Seven years ago, I wrote an article "Who Says the Plants Are Not Compassionate", in which I wrote about the persimmon and pear trees in this courtyard.Especially the pear tree that was saved by Guanhua.I have a lot of affection for these two trees!Later, the large branch of the persimmon tree hanging outside our bedroom window inexplicably withered and broke.Since this branch bears fruit, no matter what year it is, it always bears a pair of huge persimmons, from green to orange red, hanging in front of the window.Guanhua regarded it as a treasure, and no one was allowed to touch it. He didn't pick it off until it was ripe, and he would hang it by the bedside for a few days.He didn't agree to eat them one by one until I said that if I didn't eat them, they would fall and the soft persimmons would rot on the bed.I don't like to eat persimmons, but this pair of persimmons is eaten every year.However, this branch suddenly went with the owner who loved it, and I lost the pain of touching the scene, but more desolation and melancholy.In the following spring, the pear tree that was rescued by Guanhua but half died after he left also died silently.I was so excited when I found out that it died, why did the Creator take away my little memories!After a long time, I suddenly realized that this might be because the God of Guanhua was still there in the dark, and it intentionally removed the branch bearing the persimmons and the half pear tree.He couldn't bear to see me tortured by memories, he wanted me to get rid of the haze and be strong.

But now, ten years after he left, I remembered these two banyan trees again. Aren't they also saved by Guanhua? In 1974, when Guanhua moved into my yard, the Security Department and the General Affairs Department of the Ministry of Foreign Affairs at that time proposed to renovate the gate for the safety of the minister, sealed the original beautiful big red gate, and opened a new iron gate from the house facing the street in the front yard. The two banyan trees in the front yard were also cut down so that the minister's car could drive directly into the yard through the big iron gate without getting off outside the gate.Of course I don't agree.If the gate is changed, the structure of the house will be destroyed, and my father insisted on preserving all the styles of the yard.But Guanhua was at the official university at the time, and he had to make the final decision, and I guess he would not agree.Sure enough, he was very determined.He said: "Destroying the structure of this courtyard is a crime!" He said: "Don't make yourself so nervous, how can there be so many enemies! Who will come to kill me? Why are Communist Party officials afraid of seeing the masses?!" He said: "How can such two beautiful trees be cut down?!" The General Affairs Department and the Security Department had no choice but to give in. After that, except for sometimes getting on and off from the garage, he usually got off in front of the door in the morning and evening. Say hello to neighbors in the neighborhood.At that time, the older men in the alley called him "Master Qiao", and the older aunts and aunts generally didn't talk to Guanhua directly. They called me "Niu's mother" and Guanhua "you old man".To this day, some old people in the alley still hold my hand and talk about the scene of "Master Qiao" going in and out of the alley.

I woke up from the memory and sighed deeply.Is all this true?Twenty years have passed in a long time.Looking at myself in the mirror, no matter how people envy me for "eternal youth", I know that it is my spirit that supports me, and the ruthless years have left behind visible white hair and strands of wrinkles after all.I also remembered that Guanhua's gray hair was almost the same, but I was full of gray hair back then.A friend suggested that Guanhua dye his hair black, he laughed and said he would not do such a stupid thing.Guanhua said that Zhou Nan described his hair color as "Romantic Gray" (romantic gray), which he particularly admired.Another time, I found a white hair, and I made a big fuss and said to Guanhua: "No, I have white hair." But he "gloated" and said: "That's great, it's better to have more, and you can do it too." Turned into Romantic Grey. Our color is the same, I am more happy." Now, I have really turned into Romantic Grey, but where is Guanhua?I opened the sandalwood box I treasured, and took out the two strands of gray hair at the temples that I asked Dean Wu Weiran to cut off for me after Guanhua passed away. This is the only part of Guanhua's body that I preserved.I said to him silently: "Soon, I will soon be your favorite color."

A few days ago, Guanhua's old friend Gong Dafei advised me to live a more carefree life.He said that it has been ten years since Guanhua passed away, I can't always torture myself and never forget my love for him.I said I've gotten better over the years.But emotion is something that cannot be controlled by reason.I also hope to be more free and easy, forgetting is impossible, but I would like to bury the memory of Guanhua deeper.I said that this year is the tenth anniversary of his death, and I wanted to write a long article to tell people his and my story.And then I hope the next ten years will be easier for me.

Therefore, there is the following article commemorating the tenth anniversary of Guanhua's death. last mid-autumn night On September 22, 1983, the last page of Qiao Guanhua's medical record at Beijing Hospital faithfully recorded the last moment of his life: 83-9-22 morning, unconsciousness, unable to speak, not responding to calls, bed-wetting, coma, and purple lips , breath 28, heart rate 120, oxygen inhalation. At 9:00 after taking the medicine, he was conscious, and he could respond, nodding or shaking his head. At 9:40, when He Ying and Mrs. Zhu came to visit, they were conscious and smiled. They waved goodbye when they left and drank a few mouthfuls of albumin from their wife.

9:45 Breathing slows down. At 9:50, the breathing stopped, artificial respiration was performed, and the senior director of the anesthesiology department was asked to intubate, maintain breathing, and give oxygen. At 10:03, the heart stopped beating, and the pupils on both sides were dilated. At 10:40 a.m., the heart massage was still ineffective for ten minutes and he died. Cause of death: advanced lung cancer, respiratory failure. Director Gu, Director Qian, Director Shen, Head Nurse Li and some nurses participated in the rescue.After his death, he was sent to the mortuary by Vice President Guo and Director Qian.

The last period in the medical record became the end of Guanhua's vigorous life.He just left me, the life he loved, and the world he loved.He took away my love for him, and also took away his many unresolved feelings and unjustified grievances.What he left me was endless thoughts and loneliness, and he also left me with a heavy cross. I wanted to tell the many kind-hearted people who cared about him and me all the time what he hadn't finished in time. To this day, whenever the Mid-Autumn Festival comes, I can't help but tremble in my heart.The moon cakes on the street always remind me of the Mid-Autumn Festival night ten years ago that I can't get rid of from my heart. The night of September 21, 1983 was Guanhua's last night in the world, and it also happened to be the night of the Mid-Autumn Festival that year.He has been in a coma intermittently for many days, and I have forgotten what sleep is.I was the only one in the ward guarding him under a single lamp, whose condition might change drastically at any time.During the day, I asked the driver, Lao Zhang, to buy two mooncakes from the Beijing Hotel. I knew this was the last Mid-Autumn Festival night I would spend with Guanhua. How I wish he would open his eyes and look at me and his favorite mooncakes in his life. the moon!

At three o'clock in the middle of the night, when I was lying on the edge of the bed and drowsy, I felt his weak hands stroking my hair.I woke up suddenly, looked up, Guanhua opened his eyes slightly, and opened his mouth to speak.I wiped his face and fed him a few sips of water. At this time, he seemed to be in better spirits, and raised his hand to ask me to sit on the chair beside the bed.He held my hand and tried his best to speak, but there was only a hoarse voice in his throat, and he couldn't get into words.I cut a piece of mooncake in half and brought it to the bed, and said to him, "Today is the Mid-Autumn Festival. I bought a mooncake. We will share a piece. You can try it." Guanhua understood and smiled with difficulty. .I brought the cut mooncake to his lips. He moved his lips, touched the mooncake, nodded to show that he had tasted it, and pointed to me to eat it.I took a small bite where he had just touched it, but couldn't swallow it.Guanhua was struggling to speak again at this time, pointing at me and himself with trembling fingers, his lips were trembling constantly.I leaned against his lips, and heard the voice in his throat say: "You...I...ten years..." Then he couldn't hear clearly, and he gestured with his hands again, adding a very faint inarticulate In his voice, I could hear what he meant: "You and I have been together for ten years, and you have suffered. You understand what I want to say." Seeing him struggling so hard, my heart broke.When I wiped his sweat with a towel, I suddenly found that two crystal clear tears rolling in his eyes were quietly dripping on the pillow.He was a strong man who rarely shed tears in his life.At this moment, he knows that the farewell is just around the corner, and he can't let go of our ten-year adversity.I know he has a thousand words, but he can't say it at this time.I suppressed my tears and leaned into his ear and said, "I know everything. You will be fine. Don't say anything, I understand everything you want to say." Guanhua nodded in relief, and soon fell into a coma again. I looked at Guanhua, who was in a coma, and remembered everything that happened that afternoon.That was the last period of his unusual sobriety.Many friends came to see him knowing that he was critically ill.When Comrade Xi Zhongxun walked into the ward on behalf of the Central Committee, I leaned into his ear and said to him, "Comrade Zhongxun has come to see you. If you have anything to say to the Central Committee, do you say it to Comrade Zhongxun?" More than half a year ago, on the afternoon of December 22, 1982, the Central Committee commissioned Comrades Xi Zhongxun and Chen Pixian to talk to me in Zhongnanhai with Guanhua.The meeting was very cordial, and they talked a lot about the past.Xi and Chen asked about Guanhua's condition in detail.In the end, Comrade Zhongxun said: "When the past is blown away, it will be wiped out. You are an old comrade in the party, so you can take it easy if you are wronged." Comrade Pixian talked about the unfair treatment he himself had suffered, and said: "We You have been in the party for decades, and you have almost experienced various setbacks and grievances, so don’t worry about it. You have so much rich experience in diplomatic work, and you have to do more work for the party’s diplomatic cause.” The two of them also asked for the title Hua's opinion on the work, said that he needs to play a role on the diplomatic front, and it can be settled in ten days and a half months.Guanhua was very excited.Although he knew at the time that the cancer had spread, he said that although he was sick, he was eager to devote himself to work and finally contribute something to the party.Later, I heard that there was some kind of resistance, and finally Guanhua was arranged to serve as a consultant in the Friendship Association with Foreign Countries.Because of Comrade Zhongxun's conversation half a year ago, I thought Guanhua would have something to say to Comrade Zhongxun.But I didn't expect that he just smiled and said hello to Comrade Zhong Xun, "Thank you for coming to see me", then turned his head and said softly to me: "Don't say anything, don't say anything!" I understood what he meant, everything was over. Too late, life has come to an end, so why bother talking!I know his heart is calm and desolate. When I saw Comrade Zhongxun leave the ward, many friends gathered in the corridor.At this time, Comrade Xia Yan hurried over from the door leaning on crutches.I'll ask Mr. Xia to go in first.Guanhua saw a burst of joy on Xia Gong's face.He took Xia Gong's hand, and before Xia Gong could speak, he said clearly: "Twice, in 1958, I said 'Keep loyalty to reflect history'. In 1968, you went in. I have nothing more to say , or these two sentences, "No one in life has died since ancient times, and keep his loyal heart to reflect history." This complete sentence is Guanhua's last words left in the world.I know that's what he meant to say to me in the middle of the night when he was dying.He said "twice", one was in 1958 when he was wrongly criticized by the Ministry of Foreign Affairs for making right opportunist mistakes, and he was punished with "serious warnings from within the party", and the other was in 1976 when he was wronged, and he finally paid the price of his life. cost!However, no matter how many ordeals these two struggles have given him, he has always been loyal to the party, the people, and the country, and he will never change!The passing of time won't make Guanhua's loyalty fade away, but it will illuminate the world more and more...! On the afternoon of Guanhua's death, his old friend Comrade Hu Qiaomu sent a message of condolence from other places.I was reading the telegram and couldn't help crying like rain.When Guanhua was in adversity in those years, he never went to see his old friends who were in high positions.But after all, they are comrades-in-arms for more than half a century. They drink the water from their hometown together, come out of Tsinghua University together, and share the name "Qiaomu". Comrade Qiaomu knows Guanhua well.The full text of his condolence message at the time is as follows: Comrade Bingnan and Comrade Hanzhi: I am shocked to learn that Comrade Guanhua passed away today, and I am deeply saddened.Comrade Guanhua has devoted himself to the revolution for nearly half a century and has made indelible contributions to the party and the country.Facing ups and downs in his later years, Fang Qing went back to work and was able to learn from talents and then serve the people. Unfortunately, he was killed by a serious illness.This is certainly a great loss to the party, and it also caused me to lose a good friend personally.It's a pity that I couldn't make the final farewell because I was in another place, and I really regret it.I would like to express my condolences to the comrades of Han and all the family members. Hu Qiaomu September 22 at 15:00 What happened to the funeral was indescribable!Although Comrades Xi Zhongxun and Chen Pixian had talked face-to-face with Guanhua on behalf of the Central Committee half a year ago and explained everything clearly, some relevant departments and some people are still making repeated comments on the eulogy, whether to publish photos in the newspaper, and the location of the ashes. It is difficult to manufacture and reduce the specifications.At that time, the leaders of the CPAFFC still tried their best to follow the principles, but they were deadlocked.I'm numb to this controversy.Guanhua's death has made me sad.For everything behind this, I have seen very lightly.I also don't understand why the living should be so obsessed with a dead man.In the end, the leaders of the Friendship Association asked for my opinion, and I just said, "Guanhua's life, there is no need for others to comment behind him. History and the people are the best witnesses. I don't want to argue about every word of the eulogy after I lost Guanhua, or Whether the newspaper should publish photos or not. Guanhua has transcended all this. He will not want me to haggle over it and make a lot of noise. But I will naturally not agree to belittle him at the mercy of others when he cannot speak for himself. Since If there is any controversy, then I suggest that first, cancel the official body farewell ceremony and replace it with the family’s own body farewell ceremony. Old Joe’s friends before his death can participate voluntarily; Three, the ashes will not be stored in Babaoshan, and I will keep them myself." Some kind friends advised me that I could do the rest as I said, but the newspaper still had to publish it, because it was "political treatment." , It will be beneficial to me in the future.I said: "When I married Guanhua, faced with so many gossips, the two of us said how free it would be if we could be ordinary people! Now that Guanhua is gone, I will be a commoner from now on, and I don't need to be a high-ranking official." I don’t want the title of “widow”, and I don’t want to spend the rest of my life with the afterglow of Guanhua’s death being published in the newspaper. From now on, I will walk the route by myself, and I will live a life worthy of Guanhua.” After some twists and turns, my opinion prevailed.Therefore, Guanhua's death was only announced on September 22 by the Xinhua News Agency, which was broadcast to the outside world on the same day and appeared in the newspaper on the 23rd. Due to different opinions and my insistence, the official press release was not published.For a while, many people really didn't understand why there were only four objective reports after Guanhua's death, but no biographical introduction or evaluation.I had to explain to the asker.Now, time has passed in a hurry. In the long river of history, how many people passed away in obscurity, but they will stay in the world forever and be admired by people.How many people have held a grand funeral, but they have long been forgotten or even cast aside by people.Who will remember the praise or derogation in that eulogy? Only one person's lifelong dedication can stand the test of history the most.I have never regretted the decision I made at that time.Wen Tianxiang's famous sentence left by Guanhua himself: "No one in life has died since ancient times, keep his loyal heart to reflect the history" has already summed up his own life, why do we need others to comment? ! On October 25, the CPAFFC presided over the farewell ceremony for Guanhua's remains.More than 600 friends from all walks of life of Guanhua's lifetime came.Because the official arrangement ceremony was avoided, most of the visitors came to say goodbye to him voluntarily, and the atmosphere was sincere and sad.For me this is the most unbearable pain of the soul.For more than three hours, facing the dead body of a relative who can no longer speak, this kind of torture is indescribable in words.October in Beijing is supposed to be the golden autumn season, but on this day, it has been raining and raining since the early morning. God shares my sorrow, which adds to the sadness in my heart.After the ceremony, send the body to Babaoshan.There were very few people sent off, except for family members and members of the Friendship Association, there was probably only one very special visitor, that was Comrade Chen Yi's daughter who joined the army.I didn't expect her to go, but she said that her brother Haosu couldn't send him off because of an important meeting, and told her to send Guanhua to Babaoshan, because the friendship between Guanhua and Boss Chen was unusual.I was very moved, and I naturally remembered the friendship between Guanhua and Boss Chen that Guanhua had told me many times before his death.Guanhua told me many times that Mr. Chen was always one of the old comrades he admired the most.He said that the boss is open-minded and selfless.He is sincere and sincere to his comrades.The boss is in a high position and treats his subordinates equally. What is even more commendable is that when he finds that his judgment or practice is inappropriate, he will admit his mistakes to his subordinates without hesitation.Guanhua told me the following history that he will never forget: Mr. Chen came to the Ministry of Foreign Affairs in 1958 to take over as the Minister of Foreign Affairs.At that time, the Ministry was engaged in an anti-rightist movement, and Guanhua was the focus of criticism.Boss Chen believed the report when he first came, and believed that Guanhua was one of the representatives of right opportunism in the Ministry of Foreign Affairs.The party group of the Ministry held consecutive meetings to criticize Guanhua, and they spoke very seriously, because Guanhua almost became a rightist in 1957. At that time, he was criticized as a main member of the Petofi Club.Later, it was because Premier Zhou saved him and did not label him as a rightist, otherwise his talent would have been buried at that time.Unexpectedly, a year later, he came out of the Lushan Conference and continued to criticize right deviationists, and he became a target again.Boss Chen once criticized Guanhua as a Zhao Kuangyin-like figure at the party group meeting, "Chen Qiao's mutiny, and the yellow robe added to his body."At the end of the movement, Guanhua received a "serious warning from the party".Guanhua said to me, "That time was also very powerful, and the ghosts stopped coming. Some people who were close to each other, even close relatives, didn't come to see us."However, about a year later, Mr. Chen observed and understood Guanhua in actual work, and thought that he was wrongly approved at the beginning.So, he talked to Guanhua, and told him frankly that when he came to the Ministry of Foreign Affairs, he thought there were a lot of intellectuals here, and Qiao Guanhua was one of the prominent figures, unruly.The boss said that after hearing the report on the anti-rightist movement in the ministry, he thought that Qiao Guanhua's arrogance must be suppressed.Thinking back now, this was wrong, I hope Guanhua will not care about it.Guanhua said that an old comrade, a member of the Politburo, can frankly tell his superiors that he was wronged, what kind of mind and courage is this!Since then, they have become subordinates and subordinates who cooperate tacitly at work, and close friends who talk about everything in life. In 1971, Boss Chen was in adversity and was admitted to Hospital 301 for treatment after bowel cancer surgery.At that time, 301 was controlled by the Lin Biao Group, and the medical staff had a very bad attitude towards Mr. Chen.In late May of this year, Guanhua was also admitted to 301 due to a recurrence of tuberculosis due to hemoptysis.At this time, after the Zhenbao Island incident, Kosygin and Premier Zhou met at the airport and decided to start border negotiations between China and the Soviet Union. Guanhua was appointed as the head of the Chinese delegation, thus getting rid of the plight of the "Cultural Revolution".He was able to see various documents when he was hospitalized, so he was able to tell a lot of information to Comrade Chen Yi and Comrade Liao Chengzhi, who was in custody and hospitalized at that time.Sometimes Guanhua even asked the driver to smuggle some food and drinks to the ward to drink with Mr. Chen.The two of them have such similar personalities, and during the days they spent together day and night, they truly became close friends. In July of this year, Guanhua was discharged from the hospital, and Boss Chen was still in the hospital. On September 13, Lin Biao fled, and the plane crashed.Guanhua was the first to know, because at that time the prime minister convened a meeting to draft a statement condemning Lin Biao's treason, which was to be issued when Lin Biao arrived in Moscow.In the middle of the meeting, news came that Lin Biao's plane had crashed into Wendur Khan.For a moment, the crowd was excited, and Comrade Cui Qi from People's Daily sat beside Guanhua and copied a short poem: "Huangsha is fortunate to spread the good news, Baitie innocently burns the chieftain. Your body and name are all destroyed, and the rivers and rivers will never be ruined." flow." Later, Comrade Cui Qi wrote me an explanation, which said: "The last two lines are Du Fu's poems, which were praised by the chairman because Guanhua quoted them in an anti-revisionist article written in July 1963, so I Show it to him. He smiled knowingly, then picked up a pen and wrote another doggerel and it on a piece of paper. The seven steps were not stopped, and the four rhymes were complete. My few sentences are really a good example. .” Guanhua always likes to write a few lines of poems when he is emotional.So he imitated Lu Lun's poems of the Tang Dynasty and changed the numbers slightly, and made a new poem, which he presented to Cui Qi: "The geese fly high in the black moon, and Lin Biao flees at night. There is no need to chase lightly, and the fire burns itself." Later, Comrade Guo Moruo read this work, He was full of praise, and presented to Guanhua after the book record: "Lu Lun of the Tang Dynasty has four pieces of 'Song Xia', the third of which says: 'Moon black geese fly high, Shan Yu night escapes. If you want to drive Qingqi away, the snow is full Bow and Knife. Comrade Qiao Guanhua imitated it, and made a new song. The coincidence is perfect, and it is wonderful. The question is a small one, and I am happy to accept the order, to show the appreciation of the strange writing, and to celebrate the good deeds. Comrade Guanhua sits on the right, I am always amazed at the scene. Guo Moruo in 1973." Guanhua hurried to 301 to visit Comrade Chen Yi early the next morning when he learned of Lin Biao's end.He excitedly said to Boss Chen: "Boss! If something big happens, it's a good thing! Or what you often say has come true: 'Good will be rewarded with good, and evil will be rewarded with evil. It's not that the time has not come. Everything will be reimbursed.’ Now, I have discipline, so I can’t tell you as much as I want. The central government will convey it soon.” Comrade Chen Yi said very excitedly: “Old Qiao, these few words are enough. The party has discipline, Don't say what you shouldn't say now." In November of this year, China entered the United Nations, and the whole country celebrated.The chairman and the prime minister recommended Guanhua as the head of the first Chinese delegation.The entire Politburo headed by the Prime Minister went to the airport to see him off.Before the departure, Boss Chen hosted a family banquet to see Guanhua off. Comrades Ye Jianying and Comrades Wang Zhen were also present.Boss Chen spoke earnestly and earnestly told Guanhua to take care of his heavy responsibilities.However, when Guanhua went to the United Nations General Assembly in the autumn of the following year (1972), Boss Chen had already passed away for eight months.Thinking of the happy reunion with Boss Chen a year ago, and now that he is an old friend, Guanhua couldn't help but burst into tears.On the eve of his departure, he wrote the following poem in memory of his respected Comrade Chen Yi: When I went abroad last year, there was a willow in front of Xiao Se's door. Under the fallen leaves in Chang'an, we drank yellow flower wine together. When I went abroad this year, the scenery remained the same. I don't see the person from last year, and the sleeves of the green shirt are wet with tears. Guanhua later added a note: "From May 27 to July 10, 1971, I lived with Comrade Chen Yi in '301' day and night. The 'September 13' incident happened, and everyone was happy. At the end of October and early November of 1971, Mr. Chen invited Ye Shuai , Wang Zhen and I enjoyed drinking together. Soon, Chen relapsed and passed away on January 6, 1972." Later, around 1981, when the writing team of the Nanjing Military Region wrote "Chen Yi Biography", a large part of the diplomatic sub-volume "Diplomat" was the material that Xiao Lu (Comrade Chen Yi's youngest son) brought the writing team to visit Guanhua.Guanhua said: "I can contribute a little to this book, and I will also make a final contribution to Boss Chen." Among Comrade Chen Yi's children, Haosu was the oldest. I think he knew more about his father's unusual friendship with Guanhua, so he asked his younger sister to join the army to send Guanhua to the last journey on his behalf. Three days later, on October 29, I went to Babaoshan to collect Guanhua's ashes.The strange thing is that it was not only rainy but also windy that day.I put Guanhua's ashes in my bedroom. The urn was specially made by me: the black marble was designed by his friend Ding Cong. "In life, since ancient times, no one has died, so keep his loyal heart to reflect the history." When ordering this urn, the leader of the marble factory learned that it was made for Guanhua, and made an exception to process it specially for him.The workers volunteered to work three shifts after hearing about it.When I sent the dinner, the workshop director said: "You don't have to be polite. We are doing this for Minister Joe. He has made so much contribution to the country. This is what we should do." When the final payment was made, the factory refused to accept the inscription For the money spent on gold leaf, the factory manager said: "This little gold leaf is a tribute from all the workers in our marble factory to Comrade Qiao Guanhua. Thank you for bringing honor to the country, and the people will remember him." I was so moved that tears poured down my face.Over the past few years, such touching things have repeatedly appeared wherever I go.In addition to being touched, I understand Guanhua's firm belief in "retaining loyalty and reflecting history". At this point, it seems that everything is over.All the contradictions seemed to come to an end as Guanhua turned into wisps of smoke.When I left Beijing on the train going south a week later, except for Zhang Fengwu, the driver who accompanied Guanhua to the end, probably no one remembered that I was leaving, so no one came to see me off.When Lao Zhang expressed his indignation about this, I just smiled sadly and said, "Maybe this is the cruelty of the world!" I left Beijing because I was physically and mentally exhausted, and because all the nostalgia caused by this yard made my nerves almost collapse.I went to Shanghai because there was no other place to go, and because it was the starting point of my life. I wanted to go back to the Huangpu River to reminisce about the past years and find the starting point of the rest of my life. The winter in Shanghai that year was cloudy and cold.I wandered on the banks of the Bund in the drizzle and bitter cold wind countless times, reliving the short ten years of my life with Guanhua over and over again.