Chapter 49 half diary

Sure enough, Ling Shuhua was not at home.The concierge handed a message to Huiyin, which read: "I couldn't find Zhimo's diary yesterday, but after checking my own diary from that year, I knew that Zhimo handed me three copies: two big ones, one small one, and the small one is yours. Put it in the box after reading it. The big one (full) is not finished reading, so I want to put it in the calligraphy and painting box (because there are many friends, so I keep it safe). Because of traveling around in three or four years, the books at home are all empty. They are piled up into a mountain, and there is very little chance to reorganize them. I have to check them carefully during the day, and I will definitely find them out. In the past two days, there are personnel disturbances, and it will take about the end of this week to search them.”

After reading the message, Huiyin felt her heart was suffocated, and she wanted to turn around and leave, but she calmed down and left a note: "Shu Hua: If you have time, please be sure to find the diary. It is a remnant of an unfortunate time, and I want to read it, and think you will forgive me." When Huiyin returned home, the feeling of being teased was lingering.Sicheng also felt that Shuhua's behavior was unreasonable, but he could only comfort Huiyin.Huiyin was already suffering from neurasthenia, and was disturbed by this incident, so he couldn't sleep at night.She speculated on various possibilities over and over again, and even stood in Ling Shuhua's position, wondering why she would do this.Huiyin speculated that perhaps Ling Shuhua had to keep a copy because he was afraid that he would not return the diary, so he delayed giving it back; if so, it would be too difficult for her.

A few days later, some of Huiyin's friends also knew about it somehow.Someone told Huiyin: Ling Shuhua told Mrs. Tao Shen Xingren at Tao Menghe's house that Huiyin took Xiaoman's two diaries and did not want to return them, but also wanted Zhimo's diary she kept, which she was unwilling to give. A week passed in the blink of an eye. December 14 was a Monday, and Huiyin and Sicheng went to the Construction Society. Ling Shuhua came to Lin Huiyin's house and left a diary and a note. When Lin Huiyin opened this diary, he couldn't help laughing—it was only half of the diary, and the date of opening was November 17, 1920. The last sentence was: "The plan was bad." A day or two before seeing Lin Huiyin for the first time.

Xu Zhimo's "Kangqiao Diary" just missed the period when he met Huiyin.Who cut this part of the diary? Lin Huiyin was angry. The grief of losing a close friend was mixed with the feeling of being deceived without knowing it, which made her eager to clarify the facts. Because the matter was entrusted by Hu Shi, Huiyin wrote two letters to Hu Shi, telling the whole story.In order to explain the whole story clearly, Huiyin even took the trouble to list the time, place, main conversations and results of every communication between her and Ling Shuhua in the letter.This kind of listing one by one is contrary to her usual aloofness, and even seems a bit tireless and rambling.She did not hide her anger: "Mr. Shizhi: I wrote a letter in the afternoon, and I am attaching the letter today. I think historians will not be surprised by my letter. I am straightforward and quick-tempered, and I hate people who are mean and twisted and tell nonsense the most. , This time because of Shuhua's nonsense, I am really confused."

She confesses her feelings: As for the period of diary I want to read, I think it's a woman's persnickety or curious part, but it's too human in my heart, so I don't feel ashamed. ... I think this matter is really unfortunate from the perspective of personnel, but from the spiritual point of view, this incident may have helped me to cultivate my personality, knowledge and cultivation for the reason why Zhimo became a poet. Zhimo inaway does not regret that he has This painful history.