Chapter 11 Chapter 1 A Bundle of Contradictions

once.Several friends asked him: "Lin Yutang, who are you?" He replied: "I don't know who he is, only God knows." Another time, he said: "I'm just a contradiction, but I think He takes pleasure in contradicting himself." He loves contradictions.He likes to see traffic safety publicity vehicles get into an accident and hurt people. Once he went to a temple on Xishan in the western suburbs of Beiping to see the son of an eunuch.He described himself as a pagan, but he was a Christian at heart.Now he was absorbed in literature, but he always thought it was a mistake not to study science in his freshman year.He loves China and the Chinese people, and his frankness and truthfulness surpasses all other Chinese people.He doesn't like Fascism and the Communist Party. He thinks that the ideal tramp in China is the person with the most status. This kind of extreme individualism is the most terrible enemy of the tyrant and the enemy who will fight hard to the end. .He admires the West very much, but despises Western educational psychologists.He once called himself a "realistic idealist".He also called himself a philosopher who "sees life with a cold eye".He loves writers with eccentric ideas, but he also loves plain and appropriate understandings.He was interested in literature, pretty country girls, geology, atoms, music, electric electric razors, and all kinds of new scientific inventions.He used clay and dripping wax to make colorful landscapes and portraits on glass to amuse himself.Loves walking in the rain; swimming about three yards; loves debating theology; loves blowing soap bubbles with the kids.Seeing the secluded place with thick weeping willows by the lake, I feel sad, but I am at a loss for the beauty of the ocean.All mountains are loved by all.When getting along with her boyfriend, she loves to swear, but she is extremely upright with women.

There is no book in my life that I don't read.Greek, Chinese, and contemporary writers; religion, politics, science.Love to read the Topics column of the New York "Time Magazine" and the "Fourth Editorial" of the "London Times"; there are also all the news framed around it, as well as scientific and medical news; A reliable method of truth; also despises academic terminology - thinking that terminology is just a cover for lack of insight.Extremely curious about everything; has a complacent view of women's clothes, can openers, and chicken eyelids.He has never read Kant's philosophy, he said it is unbearable; he hates economics.But love Heine, Stephen Leacock and Heywood Broun.Very obsessed with "Mickey Mouse" and "Donald Duck".There are also actor Lionel Barrymore and actress Katherin Hepburn.

He sat at the same table with diplomatic ambassadors or ordinary people, and he didn't care at all, but he couldn't bear the restraint of etiquette.He never intends to give anyone any impression.He hated wearing a tuxedo. He said he looked too much like a Chinese servant in it.He didn't want to publish his own photos, because the reader's illusion of him was an old oriental philosopher with a fluttering beard, and he didn't want to destroy this illusion in the reader's heart.He loves a crowd as long as he is at ease among them; otherwise, he leaves.When he heard Chen Youren's English, he was moved, so he joined the revolutionary government in Hankou and served as the secretary of the Ministry of Foreign Affairs. Rather than carnivorous animals, I am good at governing myself, but not good at governing others." He once wrote: "For myself, following my nature is like being in heaven."

Extremely faithful to his wife, who allowed him to smoke in bed."That's always been the hallmark of a perfect marriage," he said. Excellent for his three daughters.He always thought that his beautiful girlfriends were closer to his wife than to him.When his wife expressed admiration for him, he was not stingy with self-admiration, but he refused to write "To my wife..." in front of his book, which would seem too public. He claims to be a disciple of Taoist Lao Zhuang, but he claims to be the hardest worker in China except Chiang Kai-shek and his wife.He couldn't bear to stand still; if the train hadn't come in, he would walk all over the platform, looking at the sweets and magazines in the shops.I'd rather walk up three flights of stairs than wait for the elevator.Washing dishes is fast, but it is always inevitable to damage a few.He said that Addison's twenty-four-hour sleeplessness was nothing; it was all a matter of concentration on work. "After five minutes of the U.S. senator's speech, Addison would doze off, and so would I, Lin Yutang."

His only exercise was walking the streets, and lying on the grass in New York's Central Park when the police couldn't see him. He smoked cigarettes whenever he was awake and not asleep, and claimed that his prose consisted of nicotine.He knows which page of his book has the most nicotine.I get dizzy after drinking a glass of beer, but I think I can't forget about wine. In a sketch①, he described his ideal of life as follows: ① See "Yan Zhi Pian". "If there's a Coke here, I'll have nothing else to think about." "I wish I had a room where I could work. The room didn't have to be super clean or tidy. No need for Agathe's rag from the Story of San Michele Wipe it clean wherever she can go. As long as I feel comfortable, friendly, and familiar with this room, there is a Buddhist oil lantern hanging above the bed, the kind you see on Buddhist or Catholic altars. Smoke, musty books, other inexplicable smells...

"I want some gentlemanly clothes, but I've worn them a few times, and a pair of old shoes. I need the freedom to wear as little as I want...if it's ninety degrees Fahrenheit in the shade At five degrees I must have the right to be half naked in my house, and I am not ashamed to do so in front of my servants. They must be as pleasing to the eye as myself. In summer I need a shower, in winter I want wood for a comfortable fire. "I need a home where I can be spontaneous... I need some really childlike kids who can play in the rain with me and who can take showers as much fun as I do.

"I would like to hear the rooster crowing in the morning. I would like to have several tall trees nearby. "I want a few friends who are close to life as usual. They can be acquainted and informal. They have some troubles, whether they are marriage problems or other problems. They can all be honest. They can quote the Greek comedian Aristotle Sha (Aristo Bphanes) ) comedies, and dirty jokes, they must be mentally rich, and can be frank and natural in swearing and philosophy, they must have their own quirks, they must have their own opinions on things. These people want Each has its own beliefs, but they also respect mine equally.

"I want a good cook who can cook vegetables and make good soups. I want a very old servant who thinks of me as a great man, but doesn't know what I'm great about. "I want a good study, a good pipe, and a woman. She needs to be smart and solve things. When I have to do things, she can not disturb me and let me do things with peace of mind." Before my study, I have to repair several poles. Every day is rainy, and winter is sunny. Thousands of miles are as blue as the sea, just like my usual winter in Beijing. "I want to be free to show my true colors and be natural, without having to be fake."

In accordance with the habit of Chinese scholars to give their study a name, I call my study "If you don't call it a study".In an essay①, he explained himself in his own life: "I hate power, I will never sit on a wall; I don't do somersaults, neither physically, mentally, or politically. I don't even know how to be fashionable or popular. "I've never written a line to please the authorities, or to please them. I've never said anything to please anyone; I don't even think about it. "I have never donated a penny to the China Aviation Foundation, and I have never donated a penny to the disaster relief meeting hosted by the Chinese Orthodox Society. But I have given a few dollars to the lovely poor old farmers.

"I have always loved revolutions, but I have never loved revolutionaries. "I've never been successful, or comfortable, or complacent; I've never looked in the mirror without feeling numb with shame. "I hate petty politicians. No matter what institution I'm in, I don't want to fight them. I avoid them. Because I don't like the way they look. "In discussing the politics of my country, I can never be cool and detached and unsentimental, or tactful and articulate. I can never be scholarly, never have weak knees, never be hypocritical. "I have never rescued a girl from prostitution, nor persuaded a heathen to return to the Lord Jesus. I have never felt a crime.

"I thought I was as moral as others, and I thought that if God loved me half as much as my mother loves me, he wouldn't send me to hell. If people like me don't go to heaven, the earth will not suffer No wonder." ① See. I said in it that the ideal man is not a perfect man, but just a lovable and reasonable man, and he is just trying to be that kind of man.