Chapter 8 Section 8

CAROL didn't remember how he left the restaurant in a huff, but felt that the food he had eaten was turning over, his chest was tight, and it seemed that his lungs would really explode without screaming a few times.She felt that "the man" seemed to be chasing after him, but he may have been called back by the waiter to pay the bill.She didn't look back to see if he was chasing him, and she didn't care how much traffic was on the road, she just wanted to leave that place as soon as possible, and the criminals who fled the crime scene couldn't run faster than her. When I got back to the dormitory, I fell asleep with my head covered. Fortunately, no one in the same dormitory was there. If someone asked her a few words at that time, she would definitely scold them without thinking.She herself doesn't know what's wrong with herself, it seems that the way she expresses her sadness is very different from ordinary girls.Others will cry when they are sad, and they will sob and cry when they are sad, but what about her?When she was sad she seemed angry, angry at the person who made her sad, she just wanted to yell, smash something, hurt someone.Of course she didn't do this, but it was all because of the image, the influence and the consequences. If a person could not be held legally responsible for what he did when he was sad, she didn't know what he would do.

After lying on the bed for a long time, I felt that my anger was slowly subsiding, and I didn't understand why I was so angry. Does it make a difference if "that man" has been married twice or thrice?I already knew that he was such a person. Married twice or married three times is only a quantitative difference, not a qualitative difference. As the saying goes, when a person is about to die, his words are also good.This sentence, in her opinion, means that when people know that they will die soon, they will often seize the precious time before death to ask others for forgiveness.Why would a dying person want forgiveness?In fact, there is no difference between forgiving and not forgiving. If you forgive him, he will die; if you don't forgive him, he will still die.But people still seek forgiveness and forgiveness assiduously, maybe it is just to not carry the sins of this life to the next life, maybe it is just an unfulfilled wish to settle before death.

Death is like the most convincing mediator. Many conflicts that cannot be resolved in a lifetime can be easily resolved when death is approaching.People who are about to die have kind words; people who are about to die have kind hearts.What cannot be tolerated at ordinary times can be tolerated at the moment of death; what cannot be reconciled for many years can be reconciled at the time of death. When she first heard that he had cancer, she thought that he seized the opportunity before death to confess to her his mistakes in the past.In the face of death, if he could tell her himself that he was wrong and that he shouldn't be with that Xiuzhen, then maybe she would forgive him.

But he didn't have the heart of repentance at all, he was only telling how much he loved her and her mother, but he also said that he loved Xiuzhen, as if he was a love saint, all love was sprinkled in the world, and she was wronged It's been the same for him for so many years.When he died, he refused to admit his betrayal, he couldn't give a reason for his betrayal, he couldn't justify himself, he hesitated, as if he was true love for everyone.How is this possible?It's a fantasy, do you think I'm a child? After that, for a long time, CAROL didn't understand why this meeting hurt her so deeply. She only felt angry, angry, hopeless, and painful, but she didn't know why.Just because it turns out he was married three times instead of twice?

Carol didn't realize why she was angry until her mother called.She was mad at her mother. The infidelity, betrayal, and abandonment of "that man" are already history. It is a history that she has carried for a long time. After carrying it for so long, it has become a part of her life, and she no longer feels the weight of history, because In this history, she is just an innocent victim.There is a grievance, there is a debtor, there is a target of hatred, and I hate him fiercely. No matter how much sadness and pain has found a source, there is an object to vent.But her mother, whom she had respected and loved for so many years, suddenly became a third party involved, which made her unbelievable but she had to believe it.

My mother is a smart person. The only thing that seems to have a low IQ is her obsession with "that man". She never said "no" to "that man", and always said it was that Jane The problem is that Jane must have seduced "that man" and threw herself into his arms.And his mistake was the mistake that all men except Liu Xiahui would make - he failed to sit still.Now that Liu Xiahui has been classified as a fool or impotent, his mistakes are no longer mistakes.On the contrary, he was in a mess when he sat down, which just proved that he was not a fool, nor was he impotent.

Although he knew that without his mother's intervention, he would not have his own life, Carol was still angry.What do I want this life for?They irresponsibly brought me into this world, and I would rather not have this life.They are like those characters in cheap novels or soap operas, they have sex on the spur of the moment, and then the man is shocked when he hears that the woman is pregnant, and orders the woman to kill the child, and the woman will not die. Ken, just barely married.Such a marriage foundation, of course, cannot withstand the intervention of a new third party. She was sure it was "the man" who had seduced Mom.He is a music teacher at a normal university, and his mother is his student.It is a well-known truth that female students are easily fascinated by young and promising male teachers.Carol can imagine his limelight and charm on the podium with his eyes closed, not to mention the hands-on guidance in the piano room, the weeping ensemble between the piano and violin, and his natural melancholy s eyes.It is very understandable that a girl student who is just beginning to fall in love with a handsome university music teacher.The problem is that this university teacher, as a married man, should distance himself from these unmarried female students and tell them clearly: I am a married man.

She can be sure that "that man" did not do this. On the contrary, he must have concealed the fact that he was married, let his charm charm those naive and ignorant girls in love, and waited for them to be caught.She understood now why her mother never mentioned "that man's" previous marriage, how could she?Without that marriage, Mom was just an unhappy woman whose husband had betrayed her and that was all.Now that that marriage has been exposed, my mother is no longer a flawless woman. On the contrary, she has become a sad and hateful woman who started by harming others and ended by being killed.

After talking to her on the phone, my mother heard that she was in a very unstable mood, and after repeated questioning, Carol just said lazily, "It's nothing, I met that man, and he told me everything." "What did he tell you?" Mom asked in amazement. "We have nothing to hide from you." "He has four children, you didn't hide it from me?" She could hear her mother hesitated a bit: "That's not a secret, it just has nothing to do with you." Carol couldn't bear to lose his temper with his mother, so he just said flatly: "It has nothing to do with me? Are you afraid that one day I will fall in love with my own half-brother without knowing it?"

Mom suddenly choked: "Then——, how is that possible? You——they—" "I used to think that you were a victim, but in fact you are not. You tore him and his ex-wife apart, and your family was torn apart by that Xiuzhen. I really have no right to speak about the grievances between you, but When you were doing this, did you think about your children? Maybe you think that I broke up his first marriage, and my presence forced him to marry you. He married a woman. And that Xiuzhen’s child, And broke up your marriage with him. You must hate us uninvited guests in your heart."