Chapter 6 Section 6

"Want something to eat?" he asked. "Whatever." Carol said absent-mindedly. She has not recovered from the shock just now, and she has been trying her best to recall the essence of dialectical materialism, telling herself that there is no "superconsciousness" in the world, and consciousness exists in the form of matter. , A stroke is material, a car accident is material, cancer is material, and cannot be manipulated by anyone's will. He didn't seem to notice anything, smiled happily, and his thick eyebrows flew to the temples on both sides: "Do you still remember that during the summer vacation, the two of us always went to buy breakfast. When we asked our mother what to eat for breakfast, she said Say 'casual', I know she likes to eat jajang noodles, so I always buy her jajang noodles, but you think jajang noodles are 'casual', so every time we go to buy breakfast, you say to the waiter: my mother Eat 'anything'."

CAROL also remembered those distant things.He remembered it so clearly, when he talked about it, he was happy and proud, like every treasure in his family.The restaurant waitress who was waiting to order also laughed and looked at him with a smile. She seemed not in a hurry and listened patiently to him. "Please bring us a braised frog, sliced ​​lotus root, watercress with garlic, and a steamed whole fish." He raised his face and said to the waitress with a smile. The waitress nodded attentively, wrote down the name of the dish, and glanced at him from time to time. After memorizing it, she took the recipe and said coquettishly, "You don't need this, do you? Then I'll take it, don't regret it."

CAROL smiled helplessly, shook his head slightly, it was really hopeless.Like all people who know their own charm, he can't help but want to show his charm at any time. Maybe he has no ambitions, but just wants to test whether his charm works.Once someone is charmed by his charm, there is a sense of accomplishment in his heart. In today's fashionable words, it is love to discharge electricity.The person who discharges the electricity is excited that he can shock the audience; the person who is charged enjoys the feeling of numbness but not death. This is a tacit and consensual game.The person who was discharged did not expect to be turned over by the electric shock and carry it back as a fruit of victory; the person who was shocked did not intend to be turned over by him and become a plaything in his palm.Everything is casual, with no particular purpose.Only his wife may hate him for wasting precious power resources like the people in power-poor areas, but she can't come up with any substantive accusations.He didn't do anything, and you couldn't collect the electric charges he released to testify in court.

She remembered going out to eat breakfast with him when she was a child, and she never had to wait in line. The waitresses liked to talk to him, joke with him, and prepare what he asked for while talking.When she was young, she felt that those people smiled at him very sweetly, and they also showed her hospitality by the way.But if you go to that restaurant with your mother, there is no such treatment. CAROL felt that he was superior to this kind of tricks since he was a child. When he was five or six years old, he didn't know the word "show off", and he often felt that he liked to show off.Sometimes in crowded places, such as waiting for a bus at a station, or walking in a park, he would teach her staff or practice vocalization.He told her the advanced knowledge that was older than her, which attracted passers-by to stop and watch and listen. The more people surrounded him, the more energetic he spoke.She could feel that he was no longer talking to her, but to those onlookers.

Perhaps because of him, CAROL has always been able to see through a man's show off.She watched those who looked very mature and profound, and watched them show off in front of others like children, and often felt that she was very old. He didn't seem to notice that his daughter was judging him condescendingly, and smiled and said to her, "These are your favorite foods. We used to go out to catch frogs by ourselves. I took you and my mother to the paddy fields at night, and used As soon as the flashlight was on, the frogs stopped moving and let you catch them obediently. You are very bold and dare to catch frogs. With your chubby little hands, you can catch them every time. Your mother doesn’t dare, we always scare her with frogs.”

These words of his sounded like they came from a distant place, and there was a feeling of being both real and unreal. CAROL remembered that she had indeed caught a frog, and it seemed that she could still feel the frog's smooth skin, but now she felt disgusted, because she didn't like that kind of feel very much.She remembered that it should be before she was six years old. Can a person remember things before six years old?Maybe it was just her imagination all these years?Or was it temporarily fabricated by the brain after listening to his words? "You have a great voice," he continued, cutting off the frog's legs and putting them on her plate, her favorite part.Then he deftly picked out the bones and put a large piece of fish on her plate.

She didn't know when he changed the subject, maybe she just sank into her own thoughts.He told her proudly: "At that time, you were only five years old, and you sang the episode in front of thousands of audiences in the auditorium of our school. The voice was very high, but you sang it without any effort. You Do you still remember?" He said, humming softly: "All night, the north wind blows, the north wind blows Keshan, The slaves on Mount Ke were sleepy with hunger and cold. Countless tears condense into red crystal beads, The chains on his neck were piercingly cold.

The slaves hope, long for the winter nights to be short, Slave masters look forward to long nights and long nights to sleep peacefully. Father hopes that the Red Army will often cry, I hope that the Red Army will see through, How many tears shed on Keshan, Brother, when will you pass on the good news. " He has a deep voice and knows how to use resonance, so even humming in a low voice has a very professional meaning. Carol listened and remembered the melody and lyrics of this song, every word.She believed that the singing at the age of five did happen, because this song should be an old and old song, and if he hadn't taught her to sing it, she couldn't have heard it or learned it from anywhere .

"Your fingers are long and their pads are very strong. It's a good material for playing the piano. It's a pity that you didn't continue to play, otherwise..." He said regretfully, obviously he had always been in touch with his mother and knew everything about her. She remembers going to his school when she was a child, and he taught her to play the piano in the piano room. She can't remember what she played, but she still remembers how when he taught him to play the scales, how to put the thumb under the index finger and middle finger" "Smuggling" in the past, that may be the first time she came into contact with the word "smuggling".

These sporadic memories flickered in the depths of memory like little stars, making her heart feel a little warm.It should be said that the days with him were very happy and joyful.He can play the piano, sing, draw, and amuse children.He was patient with the children, and Carol never remembered him losing his temper with her.He can even make clothes with a sewing machine, and he has made many floral dresses for her.He also cooks, does laundry, takes care of flowers and plants, and repairs electrical hardware at home.Mom still can't help but say whenever something needs to be repaired in the house: If your father was here, he would have fixed it long ago.

He is the kind of person who can make your life very happy, of course, such a person can also make your life miserable.All in all, unless such a person does not come into your life, if he does, then your life will be either great joy or great sorrow.You may hate him extremely, or you may love him extremely, there is no middle way to go. And the most impossible thing is to forget.