Chapter 20 Chapter 20 There is only one person in the world

When summer came, I started to prepare to move to Pingliang, a summer resort in the west of Kyoto. Even though the southern suburban palace is warm in winter and cool in summer, it still has too many memories, which I don’t want to touch. Jiuzhen agreed with this move to leave the palace, but she was a little reluctant to take Wu'er and Hong'er with her two children, saying: "Even though Empress Shao is the niece of the mother's mother, my cousin, we should take care of them more. But they After all, he is the son of that man..." I glanced at her and persuaded her, "The emperor is the emperor, and they are them. What are you doing together? What is wrong with the children? Have you asked the palace servants to pack everything you want to bring? Not just Dress for summer, and clothes for autumn and winter.”

Jiuzhen heard the clue, and asked excitedly: "Then we are going to stay outside for a long time? So happy." I'm afraid I don't plan to come back again in this life... I said silently. I didn't specifically inform anyone about leaving the palace, but I didn't hide anything, so everyone in the harem knew that I was going to the summer palace, and the accompanying team was much larger than the last time I left the palace. We are leaving tomorrow, so we urged Jiuzhen, Wu'er and others to go to bed early.Eryu Palace has become emptier than before, and some accessories and utensils have been packed away, but many jewelry and antiques are still quietly displayed there.I only ordered people to bring a few of my most cherished calligraphy, paintings and jewelry, and the rest can only be left here.Like I said, I like these things, but I don't lust after them.

I stood at the gate of the palace and looked at the lights from a distance. I entered the palace at the age of eight and have been living here for so many years.Although the life in the harem is boring and monotonous, and the existence is full of intrigues and tricks, this place has really been immersed in my bones, and the breath here has already integrated with me. When introducing people, people will say where they are from, such as people from Fanyang, Anqing, etc., so how should I introduce them?This is where I grew up.I have to leave tomorrow, it is impossible not to be emotional, but it is just the sadness of leaving, not the reluctance of nostalgia.

At this time, a figure in a navy blue dragon robe appeared in front of me. well!He still came after all, but this was also the last day, and he had no reason not to come.Since the day I spoke harshly to him, I no longer have the energy to argue with him.Besides, this was the last time I saw him. I sighed, calmly let him sit down, and made him a cup of tea. One of his hands rested on the table, he held it tightly and then slowly loosened it, and said, "Don't go." I really couldn't hide my surprise. Didn't he understand what I said that day?So my face turned cold, and I warned: "Does the emperor mean to restrict Aijia's actions?"

King Quan Yu spoke in a different way: "I dare not stop the queen mother's actions. But the fourth and fifth princes are my sons, and they cannot leave. They should receive the education of the emperor's heirs in the harem." I was caught by King Quan Yu.I stared at him for a while, and suddenly my tone softened, "Why do you embarrass me so much now? Wu'er and Hong'er are still so young, how can I let them go. And you will have other children in the future, I believe I, Yaoniang will also bear children for you in the future..." "I have decided to appoint the fourth prince as the crown prince at the beginning of next month."

I smiled wryly, "I don't want Wu'er to be some kind of crown prince now, I just want to take them away and live a peaceful life." "Then it doesn't matter if Gemin ascends the throne in the future?" King Quan Yu prodded me. I was stunned for a moment, and then calmly replied: "As you like. Even if we live the life of rural husbands in the future, I will be happy." King Quan Yu stood up and said coldly: "I have already made a decision, and there is no change. The crown prince's canonization ceremony will be held at the beginning of the month, and you cannot take my son away. If the Queen Mother wants to leave, please feel free."

After listening to King Quan Yu's words, I fell to the ground in a daze.Why, why don't you let me go?He clearly saw my thoughts, so he threatened me with Wu'er and Hong'er.How could he be so cruel... He broke my heart, but still tortured me in this harem. I got really sick after that. I was lying on the sickbed, and Jiuzhen took my hand and asked with concern: "Mother, why did you suddenly become ill when you were well? You don't have to worry too much about going to Pingliang Mountain Villa. At worst, we will come back after you recover." Let's go."

I smiled reluctantly, and asked Jiuzhen, "Can I play a piece of music for my mother?" Jiuzhen nodded, then turned around and told the palace servants to fetch the qin. I looked at Wu'er standing by my bed again, and I asked him to come forward and caress his little face and ask, "Wu'er, do you want to be the crown prince?" Wu'er asked me a little puzzled: "What does the crown prince do?" "The crown prince can be the emperor in the future, and he can get many things he wants." "Then the child minister has become the crown prince, can he call the queen mother back?"

I shook my head, "There are many things you can't get when you are an emperor." Wu'er bit her lip, kicked her little feet restlessly as if she was thinking about some serious question, then he raised his head and said: "But the child minister should be the crown prince, right? The queen mother often said that the child minister would be the crown prince. " I smiled helplessly. At this time, Hong Er, who was at the side, stretched out her hand to ask me to hug her, and said in a childish voice: "Hong Er, too, be... the crown prince..." I hugged Hong'er, nodded his nose and said: "But you are a younger brother." Then I turned to Wu'er and said, "Your father said that you will be crowned prince next month... Please be sure to be a prince in the future." Good emperor."

A few days after Wu'er was established as the crown prince, news came from Zhuqing nunnery that the nun had passed away. When I heard this news, my first reaction was to think of King Quan Yu's sadness. Although that person looked cruel and ruthless, after getting along for a long time, he felt that his feelings were deeply hidden, whether it was towards his mother, his sister or his children.Every time the Zhencun nun does his work, he writes the scriptures with his own hand. For his children, whether it is the eldest son Zhong who has no heirs, or the sons of sinful concubines Ge Han and Ge Min, he is careful to protect their lives. The love and care for Baoyao made me even more envious and jealous.So I know he must be very sad right now.

But I can no longer be sad because of his sorrow, and I can no longer share this pain with him. In the monasteries and nunneries outside the palace, I invited monks and nuns to chant scriptures for Zhenzhu nun, hoping that she would go to the Paradise of Paradise as soon as possible. After the nun Zhencun passed away, I didn't see King Quan Yu for a long time. I only heard that his meals were getting less and less, and he was losing weight day by day.I silently sighed in my heart, why should he do this. There was a strong wind that night, and it rained after a while.Tonight, Nian Huan and a maid named Xi Xi were waiting in front of my bed. After reading a book for a while, I felt that the rain outside was getting heavier, so I ordered them to close the doors and windows. As soon as the door of the room was closed, there was a squeak when King Quan Yu stumbled and broke open.Seeing his expression as if he had drunk some wine, I winked at the palace servants, Nian Huan and Xixi stepped forward to stop him: "Your Majesty, the Empress Dowager has already rested..." King Quan Yu waved Xi Xi to the ground as soon as he raised his hand, and ordered the guards unquestionably: "Take them both down!" I stared blankly at what was happening in front of me before I could stop it, he actually treated my maid like this directly, ah, I forgot that he has always been such a tough and domineering person. He went straight to my bed, and I subconsciously pulled up Bingsi and was pushed back.His body reeked of alcohol, and his body was already half wet. He stroked my face and asked softly, "I heard that you were sick a while ago, are you feeling better now?" I turned my head away and didn't say a word to him.He was drunk and I didn't want to argue with him. King Quan Yu didn't mind breaking my face, he buried himself in my chest, and said pitifully like a child: "Nuxi, don't be awkward with me anymore, okay... I feel so cold, like before Warm me with your soft body like that, touch me, I feel so cold..." I pulled away and said coldly to him: "Emperor, you are drunk, please go back." Maybe my behavior or my words angered him, he said viciously: "I want to have sex with you tonight." After speaking, he hugged me and wanted to lower his body and kiss me. I hid there, trembling uncontrollably, "Don't touch me, don't touch me! It's so dirty, you're so dirty..." Thinking about him and Yao Niang made me sore. "I've kicked her out of the palace! I've kicked her out of the palace... What I want is you." King Quan Yu's eye circles suddenly turned red, and he said sadly, "Forgive me, I want to I understand, I want to be with you. No matter how much affection I had for Fu Wan before, it was you who entered my heart...every frown and smile of yours touches my heart, have you forgotten? , we said that we would hold hands in the evening and grow old together..." Hearing what he said, I burst into tears and couldn't make a sound.But King Quan Yu, do you understand that the moment you let go of my hand and turned your head, we are no longer at the origin. "I can't go back...we can't go back..." "Why can't I go back..." King Quan Yu stared at me, and murmured with alcohol, "I'll treat you as before..." He burst out with drunken desire, so skillfully fumbled for my belt. "No!" I pushed him back, he still wanted to occupy my body and heart like before, and wanted me to surrender to him, but it was no longer possible. "I said that you are my woman, and you are not allowed to say no! I want to be happy with you tonight, and I will let you give birth to another daughter for me..." King Quan Yu's strength was frightening, and he easily pulled out my belt, and then reached out to tear off my gauze. I was shaking all over, I pushed him and hit him, but I didn't have the strength to stop him.After struggling like this for a while, I was exhausted and out of breath, but I didn't give up any resistance, I never thought of giving up. "Good boy, it will be fine in a while..." King Quan Yu coaxed softly incoherently, but his actions were so eager and rough. I opened my mouth and bit his arm, he was in pain, I bit deeper and deeper, but he refused to let go. He looked at me from above, with sadness in his eyes, maybe he didn't expect that I would resist so much, he couldn't imagine that we have come to this point in the end. "What are you doing?" A shocked voice came from outside the door. I turned my head and saw Jiuzhen staring blankly at the door. Her face was pale, and the rain outside was falling like a curtain. King Quan Yu was mostly sober at this time, he let me go and looked at me apologetically, the red mark on his arm was so eye-catching.He straightened his disheveled clothes, and walked past Jiuzhen who was still there in embarrassment. Jiuzhen rushed in, looked at me and cried, "Mother, how could he treat you like this? How could he?!" I hugged Jiuzhen and cried, unable to explain anything, I was so ashamed that I couldn't lift my head with shame. In the early morning of the second day, people in the harem were amazed that Jujiu Palace was empty again.No one knew where she had gone, and later it was rumored that she offended the emperor with an ordinary saying "I don't like fish balls" and was kicked out of the palace.Everyone thought that this Yaoniang came and went so strangely, it became an unsolvable mystery in the palace. And that night, several palace attendants in Eryu Palace also died quietly, even Nian Huan, who I wanted to promote, was not spared. In the fall, news came out of the palace that King Duanyu and King Gongqing had jointly raised troops in the southeast. The whole country was shocked. King Quanyu who got the news hastily summoned the officials and military generals of the court to discuss the matter at the Palace of Qinzheng overnight. When I was told about this by Nangong Jian, the teacup in my hand fell to the ground with a bang, and I was so surprised that I couldn't speak for a long time.My heart sank heavily, King Duanyu, why did you do such an unnatural thing... You are a prince, powerful, beautiful concubines and heirs, why did you do such a worthless thing!And do you know what the consequences will be if you fail. Why can't I think about it, why can't I think about it until now... At this time, the Nangong clan talked endlessly: "This time is really a great opportunity for the Nangong clan. Even though King Duanyu is well-known and sits in one side, but for the stability of the political situation today, the chances of King Duanyu's success in stealing the day may not be good. Great. My Nangong family has always been considered to occupy the court only by relying on my status as a foreign relative. This time, I might as well volunteer to actively advise the emperor. This achievement shows that my Nangong family is not a useless person..." "Shut up!" I said sharply, "any member of the Nangong family is not allowed to participate in this matter! Don't discuss this matter! Don't take credit for it! If the emperor appoints you, you can claim that you won't get sick. The Ai family does not allow anyone from the Nangong family to have anything to do with this matter." , otherwise the Ai family will no longer regard him as a clansman..." Nangong didn't know why, but he didn't dare to disobey my will under my fierce glance, he could only obediently agree. After that, I worriedly asked them about the situation, and finally said a little tiredly: "You all step back, remember Aijia's warning just now. Also, if there is any latest situation, I must inform Aijia as soon as possible." After Nangong's retreat, I was in a state of disarray.As Nangong said just now, the present is not a troubled time. Although King Quan Yu did not do it perfectly, and the ministers complained about his harsh and strict actions, the huge expenditure in the harem, and the waste of money and money in the big practice palace, the political situation is still stable after all. There are very few successful examples of usurping the throne in the prosperous age, Ming Chengzu may be one of them, but King Quan Yu is not the weak Jianwen Emperor, on the contrary, he has experienced many battles. King Duanyu, I think you should not understand the difficulty, so why are you so desperate, and I am so worried about you. When Jiuzhen heard the news of King Duanyu's rebellion, she was taken aback for a moment, and then subconsciously said: "So the Twelfth Brother really came to save us?" I felt that Jiuzhen's words were unusual, so I asked her what she meant by those words. "My daughter wrote to Brother Twelve a while ago, saying that the emperor insulted you..." My head buzzed, I waved my hand and slapped Jiuzhen without thinking. Why do you have to tell him these things, do you know what consequences this will cause! Jiuzhen looked at me with a swollen face in disbelief. This was the first time I hit her in so many years. She covered her face, her eyes were red, tears flowed out, and she said aggrievedly: "Daughter loves you so... I didn't expect you to hit me!" "Jiuzhen!" Jiuzhen ran away in tears, and my outstretched hand sank down. Don't blame her...how can you blame Jiuzhen, she doesn't know anything at all.It was me, the sinful me, this ominous woman who killed King Duanyu. I gave him hope, but I hurt him. I worry about King Duanyu every day, and the first thing I do when I wake up every day is to ask if there is any new news from the front line.But I don't know at all, what kind of news is good news for me. Even though I hate King Quanyu, and even we are strangers now, it doesn't mean that I want him to die... I won't be happy with his pain either. However, the situation at the beginning was beyond everyone's expectations. King Duanyu's army was victorious, and soon acquired the land around Zhongzhou, and even some counties and districts voluntarily surrendered.Although I heard that King Duanyu is very popular with the soldiers and civilians there, I never expected to have such a high reputation. The tax burden of King Duanyu's fief is the lightest among so many jurisdictions, and the officers and soldiers under his command are strictly disciplined, and there are very few cases of deduction and exploitation of the people. Therefore, the people trust him and support him, and Xi'e and other places are related to Zhongzhou Su Chong, many of them migrated from one clan, and had also heard about the benevolence of King Duanyu, so they did not wholeheartedly resist. What made King Quanyu even more threatening was a group of counselors and generals under King Duanyu. No one knew when they gathered beside King Duanyu. Did they expect that one day they would eventually be useful? And may become a new generation of creation heroes. After King Duanyu's army occupied Qipan, he should have gone straight to Linqiong, but his subordinates advised him to attack Baofeng instead. This was a dangerous move and proved to be a good one. Thanks to Zhu Mingde's bravery, he captured Baofeng without any risk and opened the northwest gate to Kyoto. But should I be delighted when I hear the news? This means that this person in the palace will be more worried and busy, have fewer meals, discuss countermeasures with the ministers, and sleepless all night. I felt that I was divided into two halves abruptly. There was pain on the left and right, no matter what. On the one hand, King Quanyu ordered the Chunqing garrison to speed up the journey and quickly support Shoufeng. On the other hand, he arrested the Niang relatives of King Duanyu and King Gongqing who were still in Kyoto for the crime of rebellion, so as to achieve the purpose of deterrent warning. I hurried to Yangshou Palace to look for Concubine Shu. I was afraid that King Quanyu would hurt her, so I can only protect her by letting her go to my Eryu Palace. When I arrived, the old Concubine Shu was sitting quietly. It is impossible for her not to have heard of such a major event, but she is now meditating as if nothing happened, at least not like what happened to her only one. Same with the son. She was so calm that I couldn't panic anymore.When I came to her side, I didn't know what to say to her for a while, I lowered my head like a child who had made a mistake. "Hey." Suddenly she sighed softly, turned her head to look at me, and said softly, "The thing I regret the most in my life is letting Zhuan Min be with you since childhood." When I heard this sentence, my tears fell suddenly. Does Concubine Shu talk to me like this? She always treats me kindly. Is the elder who used to smile and watch me laughing with the twelve princes talk to me like this? . My body froze there, I didn't even dare to wipe the tears that fell, I didn't even dare to cry, I just tried to maintain a normal tone and said: "Then, then, can you go back to Eryu Palace with me first..." Concubine Shu shook her head and smiled, her indifferent expression seemed that what she just said was not such a reproach.She picked up a cup of hot tea on the table next to her, as if she had found the warmth in her heart, she took a sip gracefully, and said, "You drag him down, but I don't want to drag my son down." After Concubine Shu said this, I realized something immediately, but it was too late, Concubine Shu drank the whole cup of tea in one gulp. Concubine Shu died, he was afraid that King Quan Yu would threaten his son with her, so he drank a cup of clear yellow hot tea and went.She only said a few words to me gently and then left. Her expression was serene, but also helpless and sad. Concubine Shu has always been a gentle and courteous woman, so she gave birth to an excellent son like King Duanyu.If it weren't for me, maybe Concubine Shu would have become queen long ago, and the twelve princes would have become emperor long ago. Concubine Shu, should I die more?If I had foreseen the current situation, I would not begrudge my life, but now I don't even have the choice to die. I asked Yuan Yao to leave the capital to help King Duanyu, and I also asked him to send a message, Concubine Shu, his concubine mother is fine now, and I will protect her well in Eryu Palace. A few days later, after King Quan Yu's reinforcements arrived, the two sides began to fall into a long and fierce battle, but the march of King Duanyu's army to the north still did not stop. I didn't dare to write to King Duanyu, and I also told Jiuzhen not to do so, for I was afraid that his reply letter would fall into the hands of others or reveal something.I have never believed in Buddhism, but I kneel down in front of the Buddha statue every day, chanting scriptures and praying for him. As more and more news of King Duanyu's army capturing the city spread to the capital, people who were unfavorable to King Duanyu before became silent, and those who were hesitant before turned to King Duanyu. Unable to restrain themselves, they whispered that Dayin Jiangshan would not change their surnames, but they might change their names. They also said that the current emperor is not close to the harem, and changing an emperor might be their first day. When King Duanyu's army was getting closer to the capital, it meant that he was also getting closer to the throne on the Golden Luan Hall.The news of King Duanyu's continuous victories made me think about a question one day, what will King Duanyu do when he wins the world?He will kill King Quan Yu, and then drive his children to death.He will arrest Ling Shi and You Shi like King Quan Yu and punish them severely.He will feud all the officials and reorganize the harem, and since I don't want to be King Quanyu's queen, I won't be his queen either. Outsiders often praise King Duanyu for his benevolence, but I don't think that is necessarily the case.It may be hurtful to say this, but with his own thoughts, he involved the people of Dayin in the war, and the country was in turmoil. How many ambitious people like King Nanying are ready to move around and neighbors are secretly coveted, this is not what I want to see arrived. At the beginning of winter, King Duanyu's army attacked Qincheng, and met Li Ze, the city guard who had always been known for his uprightness.I have heard a little about this person because during Xiaozong's time, he once told Zhuan Fu to prevent the expansion of the Southern Suburb Palace, but at that time Zhuan Fu was filial and did not listen to his opinion.Li Ze was so upright that he was obstinate. He guarded the city gate, and kept taking in the defeated stragglers. He isolated King Duanyu outside the city gate for several months, forming a confrontation with him. The most important thing for an uprising is to fight quickly. If the stalemate lasts for a long time, the morale of the army will begin to waver. Moreover, it is winter, and most of the camping soldiers suffer from frostbite. The supply of food and grass on the road is insufficient. The longer the delay, the worse it will be for King Duanyu. Not long after, Ling Xin led the southwestern reinforcements to rush to Huzhou. The general Kang Duan of King Gongqing guarded Huzhou but underestimated the enemy. He couldn't bear the ridicule and rushed out of the city to fight. After that, the situation took a turn for the worse, and suddenly became unfavorable to King Duanyu, and King Duanyu began to switch from offense to defense. My heart was also panicked, and I hurriedly ordered the palace servants to inquire about the news again. A few days later, it was reported that Ling Xin had regained several lost cities, and King Duanyu had repeatedly attacked Qincheng. I figured I shouldn't have watched King Duanyu get into a bad situation, I should have done something, but if I did, then what would it mean to the other person. I was restless and paced the room restlessly, unable to make up my mind. I don't know when my sister broke in suddenly. I haven't seen her for many years. At first, I couldn't even realize who the nun in front of me was. Ask who put her in. Unexpectedly, my sister said, "Are you just watching him die like this?" I looked at my sister in astonishment, the one she was talking about was definitely not her husband, King Quan Yu.Sister, have you still not changed your mind after all these years?Even now you still have him in your heart, and the reason is only because of the umbrella back then. How ridiculous... Our sisters have always looked down on each other, we are incompatible, but now in this harem, we are probably the only ones who have the same feeling, that is, we are both worried about King Duanyu. I looked at my sister coldly, and satirized her and said, "Sister, in what capacity are you saying this?" As the emperor's concubine, why do you worry about King Duanyu?Do you have such qualifications! The elder sister's expression was humiliated for a moment, but she didn't care about it anymore.She said eagerly: "Li Ze and others are not serving King Quanyu at all, they are just maintaining orthodoxy! Use your identity, use your identity as empress dowager, to issue an edict and tell the world that King Duanyu is Xiaozong After his death, you chose in your heart! King Quanyu was the original usurper! King Duanyu just lacked a reason to denounce it openly. If you support him, the world will stand by him, then the situation will be very different! " I listened to the excited analysis of my sister, who has never asked about political affairs, and sighed in my heart, sister, didn’t I think about things that even you know... But I can really tell the world that King Quan Yu is actually usurping the throne Or, let him fall into the situation of betrayal and alienation, as Wanfu pointed out? I found that the relationship between me and King Quan Yu is no longer clear in terms of love and hate. Among the objects that King Duanyu wants to kill are my two sons, and the bond between me and King Quan Yu I can't keep cutting it anymore.Besides, it is true that King Duanyu ascended the throne. Who can say that I am not repeating the same mistakes again. King Duanyu’s concubine has been with him for many years, and so is Concubine Yun, who is also raising his only heir. His harem is Is there really a place for me? I clenched my hands and stared at my sister, and the questions buried in my heart for many years suddenly made me shout out hoarsely: "You don't have any King Quan Yu in your heart, so why did you insist on marrying him in the first place!" Elder sister was startled for a moment, then she smiled, her smile was sad. "Because King Duanyu is not mine, you don't want him; if we are together, won't you snatch him from me? Dare you say no?!" I'm speechless, I don't want to think about this question, I don't want to answer this question! I didn't answer her, and I asked her again in a hateful tone: "As another man's wife, but still thinking about other men, why is such a shameless woman here to point fingers at Ai's family! Get back, Ai's family doesn't want to see you again s face!" "Is it because you hate me that you don't want to help him?" My sister said incredulously, "Is it because I begged you that you didn't do it? Ahh, I didn't say it, but you should Knowing what King Duanyu thinks about you, how can you be so cruel to look at him..." My sister didn't understand why, she just said in a panic. I looked at the confused and crazy woman in front of me, and suddenly felt that she was a little sad and pitiful.She's still so hateful, she's blatantly pointing out the things I'm hesitant about now. How many days, I sat in front of the desk, raised the pen several times and dropped it several times, Fengxi lay quietly on the right side, so heavy that I dare not lift it.Several times I even secretly hoped that when King Quan Yu would send someone to take it away again, then I could order Zhu Guangbi's garrison, Nangong's local army and Wulanghamu's borrowed troops to support the situation without guilt. The unfavorable situation of King Duanyu. But no, I even wondered if King Quan Yu was too busy to forget about it, or he trusted me so much that I would not do anything to betray him. Looking at Fengxi, I remembered that I tried to secretly send the pregnant Bi Che out of the palace without telling King Quan Yu. At that time, I hurt him, and I swore to him that I would not betray him a second time.Although I am not a noble person, I never thought of breaking my oath. The Buddhists say that not being able to get something is a suffering, so what is it compared to being unable to make a choice? At this time, all my ingenuity and wisdom in the past can't help me. I have no choice but to find Jingming. I hope he can give me a solution, even if it is an idea I don't want to hear. But even Jing Ming, who only cares about interests but not affection, just said: "Miss, this is hard for the slave. In this war, no matter who wins, the loser is the lady. What else can the slave come up with? I believe there is a difference between losing lightly and losing hard.” "I want you to name one. None of the past made me need you as much as this one." Jingming sighed, and said softly, "Miss, you'd better take care of your health—you won't be able to bear it after such a long time." I was shaken all over, and after talking about it, Jingming's final conclusion can only give me a word of comfort. Jingming stared at me for a while, and couldn't bear it, and said, "Miss, this war was started by men, and men will sit in the final battle. Naturally, there is God's intention in this. Do you still remember the war a few years ago?" In the polo match, the emperor once came to you and asked you, "This game is extremely difficult, if you win, how will you reward it?" Don't you understand now, the prize of victory is you." Seeing that I was silent, Jing Ming simply pointed out: "Actually, the slave's idea is very clear, but he has no idea, just let it be fate. If you lose, one loses, but there will always be one who wins; if you An accident happens, or you move, and in the end it could all be lost." There was no trace of emotion in what Jingming said, and he was too rational to be rational, but why did I hear these words, even though I was still in front of the servant, I couldn't help but burst into tears of grievance. The days passed while I was getting thinner and thinner. Ling Xin's army was victorious again and again, but King Duanyu finally gave up continuing to attack Qincheng and turned to retreat.The northern army began to counterattack south. I think King Quan Yu should thank me, because I still didn't publish the edict that was drafted thousands of times; and he should also blame me in his heart, because he failed to second the nearby Zhu Guangbi garrison, and Ling Xin garrison rushed It took a lot of time to come to support, and many fighters were delayed. The war lasted for nearly half a year. Although it was the first day of the new year, there was no festive atmosphere in the palace. Even Wu'er and Hong'er felt the depression and stopped making random noises. Although the situation began to gradually favor King Quan Yu, he still took the case and was too slow to speak angrily, so he decided to fight in person. This made the ministers of the DPRK and China both worried and excited.What is worrying is King Quan Yu's body and energy, and what is exciting is the emperor's personal conquest, which will definitely boost the morale of everyone. The calming effect brought by King Quan Yu's personal conquest is obvious. The morale of the army is high, and several lost territories have been regained again and again.However, some people also secretly commented that living in the front line is hard and exhausting, which is a great test for King Quan Yu's body. If there is any accident on the way, this personal expedition may not be worth the candle. At this time, Kyoto was approaching an empty city, and King Quanyu left it to me. I knew in my heart that this was my last chance to save King Duanyu. I have been waiting, I am waiting for the letter from King Duanyu, even if he only mentions a word that needs me, then even if I betray King Quanyu, even if I abandon my two sons, I will stand by him without hesitation side. But I never waited for King Duanyu to ask for help from the beginning to the end. I couldn't make up my mind to do it, I... gave up this opportunity. More than a month later, King Gongqing was captured, Yuan Yao died in battle after another month, and King Duan Yu was defeated two months later.After all, he still lacked the experience of King Quan Yu, so he fell into the trick and was captured and returned to Beijing alive. King Duanyu lost, he lost because of a first bet, and because of an edict that has not been issued yet. After receiving the news that King Duanyu had been captured and returned to Beijing, I lay in bed unable to get up, but kept crying silently. It was an undeniable death penalty, as well as his close family members. Is it all my fault... He started this war for me, but I didn't help him, and watched him fail step by step.King Duanyu, do you hate me, do you hate me? "Empress Dowager, Empress Dowager," Ruyi ran in with a pale face, and said in panic, "Have you heard that the emperor issued an order to execute Prince Duanyu five days later? Exile Frontier..." I bit my lip tightly, my whole body trembling slightly. "Queen Mother, think of a way again, can you really not save the prince anymore?" Ruyi's words woke me up, yeah, I can't stay like this any longer.I want to see King Quan Yu, I want to see him, even if I humble myself in front of him, even if I can't kneel before him, I still want to save King Duanyu's life... I put on my clothes and hurried to Qinzheng Hall. King Quan Yu was discussing something with several ministers.He was slightly taken aback when he saw me, but he didn't refuse me, he just waved his hand to tell the others to back off. At this time, I haven't seen him for nearly a year. King Quanyu is thin and old. He has been dragged down by more than half a year of war, and he is slightly different from the him in my impression.His expression didn't look like the joy of winning the battle, on the contrary, he seemed very tired. I asked him straight to the point: "Can you keep him from dying..." The tone was already pleading. King Quan Yu stared at me for a long time, then he walked to me and looked at me straight. His appearance had changed in my impression, but his eyes were still so familiar, evoking many vague memories of the past. "Okay." King Quan Yu replied briefly. I was stunned for a moment, I never expected that King Quan Yu would agree, let alone that he would agree so readily. I was a little overwhelmed by the surprise, not knowing what to say next. "Then, then..." "Then castrate him." I opened my eyes wide and looked at King Quan Yu. His eyes were burning with raging fire. It was not the anger of being usurped, but... the fire of jealousy. He approached me, pinched my hand behind his back and asked me fiercely: "Is Duo Yi really the late emperor's daughter?!" Why didn't I notice his thoughts like this before?He actually cared so much about my affairs with King Duanyu, but he never showed it. I fell into complete despair and murmured, "Then you might as well just kill him..." King Quan Yu looked at me coldly and said nothing. "Before he dies, please, let me go and see him..." I said with tears, regardless of my face. I know that the people who imprisoned King Duanyu must have been ordered by King Quanyu to stay there, and no matter what, no matter what, I want to see King Duanyu for the last time. Seeing that he was still unmoved, I continued to plead: "He can no longer pose any threat to you... Please, let me meet him, even if I am sorry for him," I panicked for my own thoughts, "Even if "…" I put his hand lightly on me. Isn't this what you asked for but didn't get? I will satisfy you, so please fulfill my request... 权禹王的眸子一下子变得幽深起来，他抱起我，讥讽地说：“太后如此盛情邀请，朕又怎能不勉为其难呢？” 他把我抱到偏殿，将我狠狠地甩在床上，粗暴地扯我的衣服，放肆地游离，嘴里尽说一些羞辱的话。 而我像木偶人一般，任他摆布，不知道痛也不知道疼，等待的唯有他实现承诺的那一刻。 可是也有那么一瞬，他支起双臂，缓缓地律动，在我上面怜惜地注视着我，仿佛我们回到了以前共享过的温柔似水。 我缓缓地闭上眼睛，那曾经欢快时光的回忆就如青烟般消散而去了，仿佛从未在我们之间存在过。 当他结束时他的痛苦看起来远大于刚才的欢愉，他背对我边穿衣服边说：“朕会吩咐那些侍卫放行，如果太后还有脸面去看他的话……” 他这话是什么意思？我顾不上完全穿好衣服，直奔铜镜前，看见的是自己脖子上和胸前的点点红印…… 我跌坐在地上，整个人已经虚软得没有力气，眼前一黑昏了过去。 善若将粥碗端到我面前，劝道：“太后娘娘，您已经三天三夜不吃不眠了，这样身体怎么撑得住……” 我摇了摇头，只问她：“现在是白天，还是晚上……” “夜了，宫里都换了第二波烛火了。”善若轻声回道。 那么就是说……再过一些时辰，就是明晨的行刑时刻了。 在这一夜里发生了许多事。端豫王的妻妾们全部自我了断，以表对他的忠诚。蔓玉死、云奴死、戈烨死、他宠爱过的妾也都以死殉情，甚至一些只是被判为流放的家奴亦有人要陪他上路。能让身边人为他做到如此地步……端豫王让多少人暗中敬佩。 只是不知道当他听到这个消息该是什么心情，我不敢想象。 另外还有……今晚姊也自缢身亡。我在心中呐喊着，姊，你对端豫王的感情真有那么深吗，哪怕舍弃了自己的儿子。 在清点姊的遗物时，宫人发现了一件不寻常的东西，将它献上给我。而我刚刚碰上它，就知道那是什么东西，那是把伞，我甚至知道它是什么时候的伞，是端豫王曾借给姊却被我撕得稀烂的伞。我一点点寻摸着伞，虽然已经破破烂烂，却粘得干净平整。 我的眼泪禁不住地簌簌流了下来，姊我，一辈子都不喜欢你，但唯有此时此刻，我敬重你，我敬重你身为一个女人，我敬重你对端豫王的爱。 我不着痕迹地动了动我藏在右袖里的匕首，明天我亦将用它割断我的喉咙…… 九珍我已写信清翎王请他帮我接走她，我想也许只有他有可能抚平九珍的伤口；雾儿和弘儿是权禹王的孩子，想必他不会亏待他们；而虹儿，原谅母亲没有机会好好补偿你了…… 夜静得可怕，我叫善若等人都退下，只留下我一个人。但是我在听，在听什么时候会有清晨鸟鸣的声音，那是端豫王被赐死的时刻，也是我该上路的时候。 端豫王，此时你在想些什么？你后悔了吗，你在想你死去的妻妾和儿子吗，还是在想我，想着我们小时候发生过的一切。你会不会后悔此生与我青梅竹马一场。 这时不远处的声音打断了我的哀绪，那是一个人的脚步声，声音虽然很轻但我依旧感觉到了它的步步接近。 “谁？”我下意识地警惕问道。 那个脚步声停了下来，然后传来一个恶狠狠的声音：“我是来为端豫亲王报仇的！” 那分明是如意的声音。 只在那一刹那间，所有曾经发生过的事情重闪而连接在一起。 啊，原来一切都是如意做的……为了端豫王而做的。 然后那个脚步声急凑起来，她在向我奔来，我应该躲开，可是一切对我来说都是黑黑的，我根本不知道应该往哪躲。 “奴兮！”一个呼喊声传来，不一会儿我忽地感觉到一个人挡在了我前面，接下来是利器刺进肉体的闷钝之声。 我扶着那个压在我身上的人，那是我熟悉的权禹王的身体，我的心骤然间冻了结。 然后我感觉权禹王抖了一下，似乎是如意将匕首抽了出来，她喊道：“我要你死！” 我抽出藏在袖子里的匕首，但却一时不知道该刺向哪里，此时一只大手将匕首夺了过去，接着听到如意一声呼叫。 而后权禹王又重重地倒在了我的身上，我的手触到了温热湿腻的液体。 “来人，来人啊！”我发出了一声凄厉的叫喊。 我伏在权禹王的身上，不停地哭泣。 如意的匕首是浸了毒的，她是抱着必死的决心想一下子就要了我的命，权禹王帮我挡了那一刺。而太医们赶到时，权禹王身上的毒已浸透全身，挽救不了了…… 太医用针扎权禹王为他放血，王全哭着开始为权禹王整理后事，其余人则候在门外。 我拉着他的手不肯放开，泪水流也流不断，我多想再看看他，我多想再望着他的眼睛，可是眼前却依旧是一片黑暗，绝望的黑暗。 为了端豫王，我可以不要我自己的性命，可是哪怕我死，我也不愿意让你死。权禹王，我的这些心思你知道吗？ “权禹，别离开我，求你别离开我……”我哭泣着不停乞求道。 权禹王浑身颤抖着，他的手不停地哆嗦，好不容易才拉到我的手放在他的唇边，轻轻而无比痛楚地唤了一声：“吾爱……” 然后便再也没有了声音。 突然王全放声大哭起来，我才知道他去了。我没有看到他一眼，我没有听他说完一句话，他就，他就去了…… 这一切发生得这么突然，我从没想过我会这样失去他。 王全在一旁呜呜地说：“太后，您不知道，这几天您不吃不喝，圣上也陪着您不吃不喝……圣上把一切都藏在心里。世上无论哪个皇上多悲惨，也不是空着肚子的，也不知在黄泉路上圣上……”便哽咽着再也说不下去了。 我浑身颤抖着，不停不停地抚摸着他的脸，不停不停地搓着他的手，对他不停不停地说话，可是我此时的手也如此的冰冷啊。 我让其他人都退下，我将自己的脸贴在他的脸上，我的泪不断地滴在他的脸上。权禹，只剩我们两个了，我们一起说说话吧。 权禹，你知道吗，你一直耿耿于怀的事情，我没有告诉你。先皇遗诏里写的人是你，他把我许给你了…… 权禹，你知道吗，我们有女儿的，她叫虹儿。她像你期望得那样，和我长得一模一样，是个漂亮的孩子…… 权禹，死之前你是不是因为幺娘的事情还觉得有愧于我。我告诉你不是那样的，是我，在你迷惑困扰时，我没有支持你帮助你，相反一把推开你，是我将你越推越远…… 权禹，你知道吗，我爱你，从少女时我就期盼着嫁给你，和你在一起的这几年是我最幸福快乐的时光…… 权禹，你知道吗…… 因为权禹王的死，端豫王反而捡了一条命回来。我力排众议保住了他的命，但他却被剥夺了亲王的封号和封地，皇亲宗册上将其名字勾去，沦为一个庶人。 他虽然性命还在，除此之外，却已空无所有。 我们遥遥相对，我看不见他，他也没有亲近我，现在没有什么人能阻止我们在一起，但我知道我们永远不会在一起了。 他因为我丧妻丧子，失去了一切；我因为他失去了权禹王。 历经沧桑，我想他看我的眼神已经不会是以前焦虑深情的样子。 但是我还是有话想问他，我低垂着空洞的眼睛，问：“你为什么不给我写信？” “我在等你，我在等你主动的心意。你说过，如果我那样做，你会恨我。”他仿佛用尽力气，苍老而疲惫地说。 原来是因为我当初的一句话……我心头一阵阵酸楚，尽量控制自己不要流出泪来，打起精神问他：“你以后打算怎么办？” “罪民已看破万事……只希望太皇太后能健健康康，还有，好好地照顾九珍……” 他的语气虽然竭力维持平静，但又怎么能掩其中的酸楚，我险些垂下泪来，但是我哪还有什么脸面在他面前流泪呢。我想我们之间再也不能见面了，可是当他要离开时，我还是忍不住叫住他：“十二皇子！” 我想端豫王会回过头缓缓而迷茫地看向我，因为这个称谓对他来说已经很陌生了。 “你，你还记得如意吗？” “不，我不认识这个人。”端豫王直接回答，也许现在的他根本没有心情再去想这些。 如意，你心中一直念念不忘的男子，到最后却连你的名字都记不得，你到底值不值得。 我轻声地说：“那么没事了，你走吧。” 端豫王没有再问什么，若是在以往他会关切地询问我到底有什么事，现今再也寻不到他对我的温柔了。我呆呆地望着眼前的一片黑暗，听那天见到他的宫人说，看着端豫王佝偻离去的身影，已经完全想不到他曾经是那样意气风发的亲王。 后来有一天我被告知端豫王已剃发出家，遁入空门，成了一名居无定所的行脚僧…… 如意虽然被权禹王刺死，但依旧难逃我将她的尸体大卸八块，挫骨扬灰，让她永世不得超生。如意和吉祥乃孤儿，无族可诛，我便命人将吉祥掘尸、负责如意吉祥进宫的大小管事、如意吉祥户籍上莲台庄三百村民、后宫与如意有来往宫人皆被杀抛尸。 这是史上最无法可依的一次残酷的杀戮，即便是这样，也不能解我的心头之恨，即便是这样，也不足以弥补我心中一点伤痛。 其实，现在的我活着还有什么意义呢？爱我的人都已经不在我的身边。 可是我却还要为我爱的人活着，苟延残喘地活着。雾儿还那样小……他还需要我的扶持与帮助。 我一直都在说，求死而不得才是最大的折磨，没想到最后应到了我自己身上。 那一天我牵着雾儿小小的手，被宫人引着一步步登上帝王宝座。 突然雾儿放开了我的手，据宫人后来说他直接爬到龙椅上坐下，定定地看着朝堂下的群臣，一副上天授之，君临天下的气派。 “太皇太后万岁万岁万万岁，吾皇万岁万岁万万岁！”大臣们跪拜的声音再次响彻金銮大殿。 权禹王驾崩后葬于景陵，庙号宪宗，享年五十四岁。 那一年我四十岁，以太皇太后的身份，开始了我人生中第二次垂帘听政的生涯。 善若搀着我缓缓走着。 突然一阵风儿吹起，吹得树木沙沙作响，吹起了我素白沉重的袍角，带来了阵阵的幽香。 我就那样停住了脚步。 善若随着我顿了一下，然后略有欣喜地说道：“啊，是玉兰花开了。” 玉兰花……在听到这个名字时我的心被撞了一下。 那个人……曾说过今年要同我一起赏玉兰，可他……看不到了。 我的手不由自主地颤抖了一下，善若却早已摘了一枝玉兰花递到我手中。我低下头，缓缓将花儿举到鼻前，嗅着它清新的香气。什么也看不见……但那香气却搅动着我的回忆，十六年了，十六年了，一切却还是那么鲜活，就仿若发生在昨日。 那曾经快乐的时光反倒像是一场美梦……现在梦醒了，只剩下我孤零零的一个人。 我娘，我爹，药婆婆，绿吹，戚姐姐，婷仪，承儿，穆宗皇帝，九皇子，楚姿，福儿，善善，武耀，姊，权禹王，元遥，十二皇子……我的亲人，我的爱人，我的儿子，我的朋友，我的忠仆，一个个离我而去。 此生已再也感受不到任何喜悦。 一个多月后，南赢王反叛。在我耳听群臣在下面争执出兵对策时，突然感受到了一种熟悉的胸闷。我的手不由得搭在腹上，却唯有哀伤袭来，此时境地，这个孩子……也留不下了。