Chapter 9 endless Love

I have been back to Shanghai for a few days, but I have not returned to the company to sell my vacation. He did not contact Shen Cao either. The death of my grandmother made me suddenly feel boundless fear and boredom about life, and made me lose interest in everything.What is the point of working?Every day facing some people I don't like, doing things I don't like, and just killing my life like this.Is it for three meals a day?For the salary at the end of the month that you can't care about eating but not wearing?What's more, what about the rich clothes and jade food? In the end, it's not the bones buried in the loess ridges, and the ghosts singing in the green pine forest?

Zijun arranges programs every day, so I don't have time to think about it.But I really think he is in the way, and I don't want him in front of my eyes. I just want to close the door, stay silent for a while, and miss my grandma. ——It is the door of Zhang Ailing's former residence in Changde Apartment. This is the first time I visited Changde apartment alone.Shen Cao has already rented this place for experiments, and we each have a key here. In order to find Zhang Ailing, I left my hometown and came to Shanghai, thinking it was an adventure in my life.But I didn't know that Shanghai was actually a revisit for me.One day more than 20 years ago, when I was three years old, my grandmother brought me here once. In order to save my mother's marriage, she bravely declared war on a woman surnamed He in a foreign land.

I suddenly wanted to know, what reason did grandma use to explain that He Nv retired from the army? The God of Time looked at me quietly on the wall.There are cigarette butts left by Shen Cao in the saucer on the coffee table. I lingered alone on the sofa, thinking about Shen Cao silently.I miss him so much, but I don't want to take the initiative to call him. You called, what did you say? The last time we met here, he formally wooed me, and I promised him that I would go back and have a showdown with Zijun, and I would give him an answer soon. However, in just a few days, many things have changed, and the most variable is my heart.

I can't understand my own heart. There is a jar of narcissus in the glass jar on the windowsill, Lingbo Yuli.I'm not a flirtatious woman, but I can't understand my own heart. I stood up, walked to the God of Time, eager to try. Just like when I was a child, whenever I encountered difficulties that I couldn't overcome, I really wanted to hide with my grandma and get comfort and protection from her.I am very curious, and I miss it very much. I want to know how my dear old grandma's first diplomatic career was carried out, how she negotiated with "that woman", and I also want to see what the woman my father once loved was like, I want to know how to win the collision of love and marriage, ideals and life in a theoretical way.I suddenly felt that for an old-age woman like grandma, all her life wisdom is actually more practical and profound than the so-called modern white-collar women.

If Shen Cao knew that I was debugging the time master privately, he would probably be angry, right? But it was too late. When I was still hesitating in my heart, I had already pressed the time switch on my own initiative. I finally forgot to preset the time of "coming back" in advance in a hurry-don't leave me behind I can’t come back more than 20 years ago, then I would really be a lost person in this world. I don't know, if I really "lose", modern medical equipment can find my soul back. The music sounded, and the thoughts gradually drifted away, as if the whole person was rising in the clouds, drifting away...

The "down to earth" place is at the corner of a dark street. I was a little hesitant, suspecting that my operation was not up to standard, and I might not be able to recognize the time and place clearly, so don't send myself to the Western Pacific all at once.It's better if it's an English-speaking country, but what if it's French, German or even Portuguese? However, at this time, I heard a crisp sound of broken glass when turning the street, followed by men's scolding and children's scolding.For some reason, I, who usually hate people's swearing, now feel that the rude abuse is so pleasant and kind to my ears.

I followed the voice to find it, and saw a burly man grabbing a boy by the skirt and scolding him, his old fist raised high, and he was about to hit him.Regardless of my fear, I instinctively shouted: "Stop!" After asking in a few words, it turned out that the child was naughty and threw stones and smashed the glass of the man's house.Surprised, I asked him, "Why are you doing this?" The child turned his head away, with a stubborn expression on his face, and remained silent. I asked the big man again: "Do you know each other?" "Who wants to know this little red guy?" The big man was still angry, "every day around here, people shouted that the window glass of their house was smashed and ran away. Today I caught him right away. It turned out that this little red guy did it and hit my hand. I can't spare him!"

My heart was moved, and I looked at the young man. The dirty mud and sweat could not hide his handsome and handsome features. A dirty white shirt was covered with ink stains. It was obvious at a glance that it was graffiti, but the brushwork was smooth and smooth. Talented. "What's your name?" The boy rolled my eyes and refused to answer. I asked again: "Is your surname Shen?" "no." wrong?I froze for a moment, then suddenly remembered: "By the way, your surname is Cao?" The boy raised his head: "How do you know?" Things are tricking people!Immediately, I was filled with emotion, tears welled up in my eyelashes, and many past events that I couldn't figure out suddenly became clear like a mirror.It was Shen Cao, Shen Cao when he was young.I think of the fairy-looking woman in white that Shen Cao told me—"That woman is very beautiful. Although I was young and didn't understand anything at that time, I clearly remember her appearance, really. Very beautiful, very beautiful, she is wearing a white dress, that style of material, I have never seen before, her smile, like the moon in the sky, has a soft light... that beautiful woman, she made me believe , I am a good child, she gave me hope. In my mind, she is as beautiful as a fairy, and her words are the express of fate..."

At that time, I was jealous of the mysterious woman whom he praised with such fiery tone, but it turned out that it was actually me! Everything is predestined, the lines and cutscenes have already been rehearsed by Shen Cao himself, and now I just need to read the dialogue according to the script: "You drew the pictures on the clothes? You draw really well, better than many people .You will be a very outstanding person in the future, with many great inventions. Everyone who knows you will respect and admire you. You can’t destroy yourself just because you got into trouble.” The little Shen Cao was very surprised. He raised his big eyes and looked at me, which gradually filled with tears.

I held him in my arms, holding him tightly, with mixed feelings.However, at this moment, the return time set in advance arrived, as if someone snatched Xiao Shen from my arms vigorously, and my arms were emptied, and then, like an alarm clock ringing every morning, I suddenly felt ringing in my ears and palpitations. I felt the wind whistling, the twilight was tight, I felt a sharp pain in my head, my eyes were dark at first, and then it was bright, I have landed safely, "back to the world"... When I opened my eyes, I felt desolate in my arms, and the corners of my eyes were wet. I reached out and wiped them with tears.

Shen Cao, oh poor Shen Cao, dear Shen Cao.It turns out that the fate between you and me has long been destined by heaven.You are destined to invent such a great instrument, and you are destined to teach me how to use it. What is the first, what is the last, what is the cause, what is the effect? I sat alone in the Changde apartment until dark.When I came out, I saw the lights of thousands of houses, like a dream.Who knows what is a dream and what is real? As soon as he got home, Zijun's call came after him: "Jinhe, where have you been?" "I didn't go anywhere, I just walked casually on the street to relax." When I perfunctory him like this, I felt a deep sense of apology and alienation in my heart.But otherwise, how to answer?Tell him "the god of time"?That was a big surprise.With Zijun's comprehension, he would regard my statement as fantasy, and might even send me to see a psychiatrist. Zijun said, "Do you want me to come and see you now?" "No, people will think we are living together." Zijun was silent for a while, and then said: "Actually, Jinhe, we really live together, and it's very normal. Isn't it like this now?" "So I'm not a modern person." I said gently, "Zijun, don't you always say that I don't eat fireworks?" "I respect your choice." Zijun finally said this. So I unplugged the phone with peace of mind and began to fall asleep with my head covered. Every time I use the God of Time, I will have a shock for a long time, just like being on a boat. The boat is rippling in the misty water. It's a small boat, except for the boatman, there are only two people sitting on it—oh no, three people.Because the older one sitting on the bow was holding a little girl in his arms.The girl's eyes were big, her lips were tightly pressed, and there was a kind of familiarity in her expression. The opponent's woman's face is clear and beautiful, with a sad expression, as if there is an unsolvable difficulty. Behind him is the boatman, shaking his oars once and for all. But what about me?Where am I? This small boat, the few people on this boat who are struggling, how can I get my place?Where do I stand to see all this?Those three generations of women, old and young, that leisurely boatman, why didn't they seem to see me?And why am I in such a strange scene? At this time, the girl who was less than three years old suddenly turned her head, and when she met my eyes, she smiled strangely.As if a sword suddenly pierced into my heart, I suddenly understood that I saw my grandma.I am dreaming.The place that the great god of time failed to go to, actually arrived in his own dream. I finally saw my grandma who was already a grandma but still young and charming, the little girl with big eyes in her arms, is it me? It can be seen at a glance that this is a rented sightseeing boat, and there are many high-rise buildings on the bank. I can clearly judge that this water is the Huangpu River, which is in the Bund area. After many years, a world-famous building will be erected there. ——Pearl of the Orient. Grandma is so elegant that she even knows how to rent a small boat as a place of negotiation.During the ups and downs, people's hearts will calm down instead, and they probably won't start a war; or, grandma made a bet, if Miss He didn't agree to quit, grandma would push her into the water and bury her dead body at the bottom of the river? I laughed in my dream, and it turned out that the melancholy woman was He Chenglong. I thought that all the mistresses in the world have the same face: coquettish, evil, charming voice, revealing clothes, like to look at people from the corners of their eyes - but it's not like that at all.Ms. He Chenglong is tall and fit, wearing a set of well-crafted professional attire, with a pleasant smile and a deep voice. She put one hand on the side of the boat and looked sideways at the river, with a little hesitation between her brows, a thousand times Hundreds of turns, I feel pity. Professional women in that era had more charm than today's so-called white-collar workers. I secretly applauded, Dad has a good vision, I am a man, I also choose her.She is indeed more wonderful than my mother. In my dream, my face was round like a doll, I was hugged in the arms of my grandmother, I looked at Miss He with my big eyes, maybe I was also attracted by beauty?I smiled even more, hey, when I was three years old, I already knew how to judge by appearance. Then He Chenglong looked back at me with sad and helpless eyes, she finally said: "Grandma, I promise, for the sake of this little angel, I will never interfere in your family again." Angel.Shen Cao also described me in this way when recalling the mysterious woman in white who preached to him more than 20 years ago. In the dream, I was three years old; but I was nearly thirty years old when I borrowed time to go back to that era.The two of me are so close to each other.One is in my dream, and the other is under the control of the time god.Among the three me, which one is the deity and which is the transformation? In mythology, the Monkey King has seventy-two changes. I don’t know if this is the same as this. The three-year-old me and the thirty-year-old me looked at He Chenglong together, full of helplessness.Not all women like to bow their heads, but all women are good at patience. Wait, He Chenglong, why do I know her name is He Chenglong? Surprised, he woke up.And the dream is vivid.Why do I know her name is He Chenglong?Everything I dreamed just now was really just a dream? I couldn't hold back, and dialed a number back to my home in Suzhou. The more anxious I got, the more mistakes I made. After pressing the button for a long time, I couldn't hear any sound. Then I remembered that I unplugged it before going to bed last night.Concentrate on yourself, connect the plug, and finally hear my mother's familiar voice from the other end, with a hint of laziness, obviously just waking up.Through the long telephone line, I seem to have seen her sleepy eyes. "Ajin, it's you, why did you call so early? Are you still used to it after returning to Shanghai?" I didn't care about the small talk, and hurriedly asked, "Mom, what's the name of that woman?" "What is that woman? You girl, you always talk without thinking. Which woman is it?" "It's the third person in Shanghai who had an affair with Dad." "What's one leg and two legs? What nonsense are you talking about?" Listening to her mother's tone, she seemed to regret telling me about the past, "Why do you still remember?" "Is that woman called He Chenglong?" "Yes, how do you know?" I am stunned.how could I know?I dreamed about it.In the dream, the woman said her name was He Chenglong.But is that really a dream?Or, is it a flashback of childhood memories?Or, is it the grandmother's soul entrusting a dream to fulfill my wish to see her again?Or, is it because the aftereffect of the time god has not disappeared? However, there is still the following text - the mother said hesitantly: "That He Chenglong, she appeared again." "It appeared again? What do you mean?" "She called your father and said she was coming to Suzhou and wanted to meet your father." "Meet?" I was stunned for a moment, and then comforted my mother, "The two of them together are almost a hundred years old. Are you going to get a divorce? What's more, even if you get a divorce, it's not a big deal, you've spent most of your life with Dad, so you can take this opportunity to change your life. " "You kid, you're talking nonsense." My mother is so cute. After half a century of vicissitudes, she will occasionally behave like a child and act coquettishly. I continued to speak eloquently: "If you want to come, you can't avoid it. It's not a disaster. Mom, they have endured it for many years. If you want to meet, let them meet. Since Dad can tell you this, I just want to be honest in my heart, and I don’t want to hide it from you. According to me, you might as well invite that Ms. He to your home and treat her as a family friend, otherwise nothing will happen. The more you hide, the more you hide. The more the enemy is, the more troubles will happen. At this time, Dad must be a little turbulent in his heart, you have to make up your mind and handle it carefully." "That's the only way to go." Mom said helplessly, her voice full of distress and helplessness.In this life, what really made her nervous was this family, right?Dad made her panic again and again, is it a kind of disappointment? Hang up the phone, I can't pay back for a long time.This matter is getting more and more wrong, the God of Time is far from being as simple as we imagined.It is a terrible invention, it can completely reverse the truth and falsehood of the past and the future, making people lost in the jungle of time and unable to control themselves.Moreover, in the dark, it seems to influence our emotions and change the trajectory of our lives. Although it was invented by humans, its ability to exert a subtle influence on humans is unstoppable by us... I finally picked up the phone again and dialed Shen Cao...