Chapter 18 Chapter Seventeen

In fact, I should have understood that fate is like a game, and we are all pawns in this game. In the end, life is better than death. God, if you think you are omnipotent, please take all that you have given me, my pride and beauty, my sorrow, my longing and my pain, everything, everything. You no longer have the slightest sympathy for me, whether you kill me or beat and torture me, it actually shows that you are tired of me.That being the case, I no longer expect you to give me happiness, you simply destroy me at this moment, let me disappear in this cold world from body to soul, because I am already tired of myself!

The past is over, I wanted to start again, just because of the vow to him, no matter how tired and empty, how deep and painful, or force myself to remove the broken past from my life, clean and completely Forget about the past.Because what I lost, even if I start from scratch, I can’t get it back, I simply change my mind and live for him, but God still refuses to give me such a chance, nailing me to the cross, and taking me from the hand of death Lila came back so that I could continue to bear this endless pain. The moment I opened my eyes, I felt that I shouldn't wake up at all. What's wrong with waiting for the man I love in another world?You don't even let me die, what did I do wrong in my previous life? !

It was very quiet in the ward, and there were foreigners talking outside the door. "Miss Cathy is fine now, but... (Miss Cathy is fine now, but...)" "But what? (But what?)" This was Geng Mochi's voice. "The baby was died. (The baby in her stomach did not keep.)" "Baby? What baby? (Child? What baby?)" "You mean she is pregnant? (You mean she is pregnant?)" This was Qi Shuli's voice. "Yes. The baby is about 3 month old. (Yes, the baby is about 3 month old.)" There was another dead silence. "Why didn't you know she was pregnant?" Qi Shuli asked Geng Mochi.He speaks Chinese.

"I, how do I know..." "Why don't you know? She sleeps with you every day!" "I...we don't have sex..." "What? No sex life?" Qi Shuli suddenly amplified his voice, extremely angry, "Then whose child is in her stomach? It's not yours, whose is it?!" Geng Mochi didn't make a sound. Only Qi Shuli was panting, "...Is it me, mine?" The poor man remained silent. The surroundings were so quiet that the ticking of time could be heard. "No——" Qi Shuli suddenly roared, rushed into the ward, threw himself on the side of the bed and hugged me, who was weak, "Kaoer, my Kaoer, how could this happen, our child...is gone, do you know Knowing that I have been looking forward to it for so many years, I just want to have a child with you, my hair has turned gray, have you seen it, Kao’er, Kao’er—”

Qi Shuli's tears soaked my clothes. "Why is God so cruel? He didn't let me get your love. He even took away my flesh and blood. I have only one blood left in our Qi family. My younger brother died and my younger sister disappeared. God left me a descendant. That's all." Is it difficult? Who will I leave the family business I have created in half my life? What is the meaning of my life! Kaoer, answer me, is it you who are cruel or God is cruel? You should know that it is my child when you are pregnant, but If you don't say a word, I've loved you for so many years in vain, Kao'er, do you know how cruel you are..."

"Let go of her, she is still very weak." Geng Mochi came over to pull him. "Shut up!" Qi Shuli let go of me, but rushed towards Geng Mochi, grabbed his collar, his eyes were red, and his gaze was like a beast devouring people, "You bastard, aren't you going to die? Didn't die? If you weren't pestering Kao'er, why would your wife come to Seattle to make trouble, and if she didn't make trouble with my child, how could she just say no, Geng Mochi, I hate you! Hate you!..." Geng Mochi was pushed against the wall, Qi Shuli didn't give up, and continued to roar and roar: "Did I owe you in my previous life? How can I not finish this life? I know your days are numbered, so I allowed her to come back to you, so as not to Even if you are a ghost, you come to pester me, but you are worse than a ghost. You took away my flesh and blood and killed my child. You are the indirect murderer! Your wife is the direct murderer. Where is your wife? Where is she? Where is she?!"

Qi Shuli let go of Geng Mochi and ran out of the ward again. After a while, he grabbed Milan in, grabbed her by the hair and slammed her against the wall, dragged her to the bedside and kicked her to her knees, "Apologize to me, to my child, you Bitch!" As he spoke, he slapped her face hard, and Milan was beaten until his mouth and nose were bleeding. Qi Shuli still didn't let go of his hatred, and dragged her up against the wall to strangle her neck, "Bitch, I want you to pay for your life, I'll kill you today!" Kill you! I'm going to kill you! Thanks to me, I will arrange a place for you, provide you with a car, and give you money to use, so that you don't bother Kaoer. Who knows that you, a bitch, actually killed me. Child, do you still dare to live in this world? I will kill you today!"

Milan struggled, his eyes widened, his lips began to darken, Geng Mochi went over and pulled Qi Shuli away. "Listen to me, if you really want to kill her, let me do it!" He said weakly while breaking Qi Shuli's hand, "I'm the one who is about to die anyway, so it doesn't matter if I kill her to pay for my life, if you kill her , you will pay for your life, who will take care of Kao'er after you pay for your life, after I die, Kao'er is yours, it's yours..." "Mine?" Qi Shuli let go, and Milan slid to the floor like mud, "Haha..." He suddenly laughed out loud, staring at Geng Mochi, pointing at me, his face pale, "Now, I will still Do you want her? She is a catastrophe and will only bring misfortune to those around her. My younger brother even died after marrying her. I spent all my heart and soul on her, but I still got nothing. Now even my children are gone. I hate you, and I hate this woman, I curse you, even if you go down to the eighteenth floor of hell, I will curse you too! You will all have a terrible death! A terrible death!"

I leaned on the bed, my ears began to roar, my abdomen felt cramped, and my lower body suddenly surged. I felt the heat of life fade away quickly in my body. My love and my hatred had all disappeared.My consciousness also began to blur, and I felt like I was lying on a blood-stained river, the sky was so far away, the wind was whimpering, God's mocking eyes were staring at me coldly, I was just drifting like this, with no direction until the end of life. A nurse came over vaguely and lifted the quilt. "It's bad, Miss Cathy is bleeding!" It was the last voice I heard in the real world.

Am I dead?I wish. ten days later. Listening to the tired and helpless singing of "Goodbye, Seattle", I often cry.I am back!I returned to my hometown where I had been away for three years.Without saying goodbye to anyone, I embarked on the return plane with my luggage alone.It was night, and the sleepless seaport of Seattle was right under my feet, so bright that it hurt my eyes. "Listen, as long as you stay by Geng Mochi's side for a day, you will never find peace. I want him to go to the grave without peace. He is my man in life and my ghost in death. Why should you be by my side?" I’m his wife, why can you get everything from him, but I have nothing?! Aren’t you just a slut who accompanies him to bed and spy on his property? Why can you get the love of two men, but I have nothing?! Almost strangled to death by them? Bai Kao'er, just stay by his side. If you don't believe me, just wait and see whether Geng Mochi dies in my hands or in your hands. And Qi Shuli, you are all together Guys, I hate you guys, I hate every single one of you! As long as I, Milan, still have breath, you guys will die!  …”

This is what Milan personally told me when I was still in the hospital. At that time, she was standing beside my bed with a hideous face and gnashed her teeth. It seemed that I really had a blood feud with her, and she wanted me to pay it back with blood.I've never thought she was so scary. Her distorted face gave me nightmares at night, and I still had nightmares after I was discharged from the hospital. As expected, Milan did not give up, and went to the door several times to make noises, or made threats by calling, threatening to return to Japan to hold a press conference, and announced to the world that the LOVE series was not written by Yesha. I know, she always holds this trump card, She didn't have to do anything, just this was enough to kill Geng Mochi.I fell into unprecedented anxiety. The relapse of old illnesses and massive uterine bleeding caused my body to collapse again, and I lost weight quickly. I returned to the emaciated state when I came to the United States three years ago, lying on the bed dying, more like a dying person than Geng Mochi. people. Thinking about this love entanglement up to now, I am really exhausted. After all, God is not so generous. He can't even realize his wish to die with his beloved man in the end, and he is so burdened with him, making him restless all the time!And Qi Shuli, he and I are basically the same kind of people, love someone to pieces, but unfortunately I can't give him the love he wants, my love has been given to Geng Mochi in this life, this man who is really dying, even if he is really death, my love has no possibility of living.Although Geng Mochi said that he went with Milan, he was going to die, and he couldn't control it anymore, but I couldn't turn a blind eye. It wasn't because I was kind, and it wasn't because I wanted to protect Ye Sha's reputation hypocritically. I was just afraid. Both men died at my hands, I was afraid that they would chase after me to pay back the debts I owed in this life, so I'd better leave and let everything return to peace. In fact, I should have understood that fate is like a game. We are all pawns in this game. Fighting to the end, advancing or retreating, life is worse than death. Why should I make this tragedy worse? The night before my departure, I invited Geng Mochi to a well-known western restaurant in Seattle's pier area for dinner, which could be regarded as my last supper.I tried my best to calm myself, not daring to reveal the slightest parting emotion.But I was still half-choked to death by the mustard, my throat seemed to be on fire, I poured half a glass of ice water to recover, and I was so hot that I burst into tears, "Sorry, I always feel bad when I eat. " He stared at me blankly, the light reflected in his eyes, and there was my shadow in it. "I'm sorry, it's all my fault." He slowly stretched out his hand, caressing my thin face, his eyes were sad. "I'm the one who should say I'm sorry." As he said this, tears rolled down his face. Through the blurred light of the tears, he felt that he had lost a lot of weight, so thin that the cheekbones on his cheeks were protruding and the corners of his eyes were bulging. Already have fine lines. He murmured dreamily: "I don't know what's wrong these days, I keep having nightmares, dreaming that you left alone and left me here alone. I'm very scared... In this world, apart from my mother , I have no one to rely on, now you are my support, I am really sorry, I should be your support, I have caused you to suffer so much, and you have lost your child, sometimes I really feel like a sinner , I don't understand how we got to this point, but I know that some mistakes can no longer be made up for. I can't give you happiness, but instead made you suffer so much. You didn't hold grudges against me, but you have been waiting by my side At this time, I realized that God has treated me kindly and sent such a good you to me. I gradually learned tolerance and acceptance in gratitude, such as forgiving Qi Shuli and letting him die when I die. Afterwards, continue the love that I cannot continue, give you happiness, give you happiness, I really changed a lot..." My tears fell on the dining table, and I held the tablecloth tightly with my hands, but I still pretended to be nonchalant, "I'm sorry, I've been crying all the time lately." He looked at me, his eyes flickering like flickering candles, as if to illuminate my heart.I panicked for a while, but he suddenly found that my ring finger was empty, and he was surprised, "Where's the ring? Why..." I untied the silk scarf around my collar and showed him, "I'm wearing it!" The ring has been worn by me around my neck on a thin platinum chain. He smiled, "How do you wear it around your neck?" "Because... I can't justly wear this ring, but I want to wear it until I die, so I hang it around my neck. It's good. Isn't Frodo in "The Lord of the Rings" just wearing the ring Hang it around your neck." "Thank you!" He spit out these two words softly, and immediately lowered his head, as if he didn't dare to look directly at me. "What should I bring you? I don't have anything valuable on me..." I also lowered my head and pretended to look for something in my bag, but in fact I wanted to wipe away the tears all over my face. At this time, the sound of the piano stopped abruptly, and the pianist in the corner of the restaurant got up and left his seat, probably because the performance had come to an end.With an idea, I got up and left my seat, went straight to the piano, and sat on the piano bench.A long-lost piece flew out from my fingers. He played this piece for me for the first time in a certain piano store in Star City many years ago. The first time I heard him play the piano, I played it, which seemed to indicate it from the very beginning. The fate of parting, from the moment Qi Shujie and Yesha sank to the bottom of the lake, we can't get rid of this fate. He never asked me why I played this piece of music. After leaving the restaurant, we walked hand in hand along the street at the Elliott Pier. The bright moon was in the sky, and the bright lights of Seattle made the moon a bit eclipsed.None of us are willing to talk. I really hope that we can go on like this, without end, until the end of our lives.The space needle was flickering behind us, and I looked at the face under the light that was unforgettable in my life, and suddenly rushed over, hugged his neck tightly, and sent my trembling cold lips. It was still the same as the first kiss many years ago, it was unbelievably soft, with a certain blurred atmosphere, thrilling, the only difference was that now there was more heart-pounding pain. "I love you, Mochi!" I looked up at him and exhaled softly. "I love you too, idiot!" He put his arms around my waist and smiled, but there were tears in his eyes, and the charming harbor of Seattle had an eternal taste in his eyes. When I got home, I took care of him and took his medicine as usual, but at the end I added a sleeping pill when making milk for him. He couldn't sleep well, and even the slightest noise could be heard.After putting him to sleep, I started to pack my luggage, wrote two more letters, and wrote the medicines he should take every day in English in a booklet and put it in the kitchen. Julia can see it tomorrow morning. The light in the bedroom is warm and sad. I stood at the door with my luggage for a long time and couldn’t move. He slept under the light, his face was peaceful. Although he was thin, every line was so soft, and his eyebrows were stretched. , as if you will see me when you wake up tomorrow morning.But he is about to lose sight, and neither can I. This farewell must be the last farewell! "Ink Pond!..." I threw down my luggage and rushed to his bedside, weeping in a low voice. It seemed to be raining lightly outside the window. I kept crying, as if all the tears in this life would be shed in one night, as if I just shouted desperately in my heart, he will stay in this world.This kind of parting is no longer once or twice, but it still makes me so painful that I can't breathe. In the blurred shadow of tears, his face, his eyebrows, his lips... are suddenly near and far in sight, but the imprint on my heart It's getting clearer. The rain was getting heavier and heavier, and I cried for a long time. Finally, I couldn't delay for another second before leaving the bed and gently closing the door. Those loves I had, those unforgettable moments, I locked them in this door bit by bit. behind the door. I walked into the night sadly. When I passed the door of Qi Shuli's house, I put another letter I had written into the mailbox in his garden.The curtains in his room were drawn, and there was still a dim light coming through, obviously he hadn't fallen asleep yet.Since he learned in the hospital that I had aborted his child, he hasn't seen me again, stays at home, shut himself at home all day, I think he is cursing me. The moment the plane took off, I was also cursing, wishing that the plane would fall into the parting harbor of Seattle immediately, and everyone would survive, only me would die. But more than ten hours later, the plane landed smoothly on the other side of the earth - Shanghai, China.Jinyi greeted me at the airport pick-up gate and gave me a deep hug. When I returned home this time, I only told her one person.Not even my parents know.I just want to calmly let those wounds heal slowly, but my family will always only have endless questioning and nagging.I am very grateful to Jinyi, she didn't ask anything, and after taking me to her home, she arranged my life silently and took good care of me. It's been three years, and she is still the same, with a delicate and clean face and a faint smile.In fact, I haven't had much contact with her in the past few years. I only exchanged emails or exchanged postcards occasionally, and I haven't even called her.As Geng Mochi said, we all have our own lives, and it is enough to know that the other is well. Excessive disturbance is not conducive to forgetting the pain, so even if Geng Mochi was seriously ill many times, I did not tell Jin Yi, but I believe she is better than her. Everyone knew about his condition, she just didn't talk about it. In the evening of early spring, when the spring breeze was intoxicating, Jinyi and I drank tea in the yard of her house. The air was filled with the fragrance of flowers, and the moonlight cast mottled shadows through the dense leaves.Jin Yi was wearing a white sweater coat, which looked even more bright and clean under the moonlight. While making tea for me, she said: "Kao'er, we should all accept the reality and live a good life, treat everyone kindly, and only by forming good relationships can we get good rewards. Although you didn't tell me anything, I know everything Well, if Miss Milan really reveals that matter one day, it’s okay. I’ve already talked to Mochi on the phone, and he also said to let her go. As long as we have a clear conscience, I hope this tragedy Let's stop here, don't get hurt, do you understand?" "Did you talk to Mochi on the phone?" As soon as I heard this name, my heart ached. Jin Yi nodded, "Yes, he knew you came to me, and he wanted me to tell you, I hope you live a good life and don't think about the past again. Although he regrets that you can't accompany him to the end, he doesn't blame you , He said he was sorry for you." "I didn't hate him. I left just to give him some peace, and also to make myself calm." I held back my tears, and I even smiled when I felt like I was in a trance, "Do you want to accompany him to the end?" It doesn't matter anymore, we still have the next life, the next life, I will meet him again, Jinyi, if there is a next life, who is the person you most want to meet?" Jin Yi was at a loss, and looked at me with big eyes in a daze, "Kao'er, do you really believe in a next life?" "You have to believe, Jin Yi. Believe it or not. We should always give ourselves some thoughts and let ourselves live strong. How difficult it is to live, how can we live without the obsession in our hearts? " "Kaoer..." Two days later, I flew back to Star City.Huanghua International Airport was crowded with people, just like when I left three years ago, strange and familiar, I dragged my luggage and stared at the terminal hall, time was intertwined, and my mind was confused, as if seeing Geng Mochi was the same as many years ago, wearing a windbreaker, Yushu facing the wind stood there looking at me and smiling. "Are you planning to marry to Shanghai with so much luggage?" "Yes, I heard that Shanghai men are the most suitable husbands. I'll go and see if there is any suitable one." "Certainly not." "How did you see that?" "The best man in Shanghai is standing in front of you." ... I didn't cry, but I was more heartbroken than ever. I was surrounded by a constant stream of people, as if I was on an empty stage. The protagonist was me, and the opponent was loneliness. From the beginning to the end, there was only parting.I was too deeply involved in the play, the people who watched the show had already left, and I was still lonely on the stage.It was already evening after staying in a hotel in the city. I stood in front of the window and looked at the lights of the city, but I couldn’t get used to it. I felt like I had landed on another planet. Without the strong aroma of coffee, even the air became strange.The night here may not be as gorgeous and charming as Seattle, but there are concerns that I can't give up in this life. I hardly thought about it. I didn't even eat dinner and went straight to the other side of the spring in the suburbs of Star City. Yalanju has changed owners. I sold it myself three years ago. I don't know if it is still the original owner.The near water building next door is lit, and I heard from Qi Shuli that the house is now inhabited by a manager in his country.On the side of the water, it was a mess. Obviously the owner was not at home. I did not accept the property rights of the house. Later, Geng Mochi sent someone to deal with it himself. I heard that the house has already been sold, and it seems that it has changed hands twice. Who owns it now? I don't know either. I walked to the side of the water on foot, concentrating on meditation, obviously there was no sound, but I seemed to vaguely hear the sound of the piano, as if it came from a long time tunnel, only three years, everything has changed! There was a sudden eerie silence all around. not a single person. I stood blankly under the street lamp outside the door, as if there was a hand slowly rubbing the wound in my heart, the pain was like a dark tide, slowly coming up from the bottom of my heart.Every plant and tree here, I am so nostalgic. The past and the past are vivid in my mind, accumulating in my heart little by little, and dissipating in the cool night wind little by little.I came back here exhausted and exhausted, with nothing left, nothing left, I looked around in a daze, and I didn't even know why I came back here. "Miss, who are you looking for?" Someone suddenly asked me behind me. Honey, please don't greet a dazed person suddenly at night, otherwise, if you don't scare her into a ghost, she will also treat you as a ghost.The moment I turned around in fear, I regarded the person behind me as a ghost. Of course, he also regarded me as a ghost. We screamed at almost the same time: "Kaoer!" "Ah, Gao Peng!" When my parents and I proposed to go to work in Shenzhen, they said: "You are just tossing around, tossing everywhere, and if you continue to toss like this, sooner or later we will give white-haired people to black-haired people!" I didn't explain too much to them about returning to China this time, but they all had speculations in their hearts. If they came back suddenly without saying hello, they must have been dumped by Qi Shuli. They ignored me in order to take care of my "fragile" self-esteem .It was my mother who cared about me, seeing that I was so thin that I had only bones left, and stewed black-bone chicken and red dates for me every day. After a month of recuperation, my complexion improved.During the period, I called the United States to inquire about Geng Mochi's condition, and it was Julia who answered the call. "Sir, he left the day after you left." "Where did he go?" "I don't know, he didn't say." "Where's Mr. Qi next door?" "I don't know, I haven't seen him for a long time." "Who remembered you in the trek across the sky? Who called your name in the lonely night? Who called you in the Tibetan song of Potala? Who looked up at the eagle hovering Weeping for you? Who lamented that they could not be with you in the time of suffering? And who expected to return to their hometown with you hand in hand? My dear, it is me, you never know, my affectionate My eyes have been following you through thousands of rivers and mountains..." When this sentence came out of Gao Peng's mouth, I was stunned for a long time. At that time, we were eating crabs in a seafood restaurant in northern Hunan. He came all the way from Xingcheng. Of course, I had to treat him well. he. "Gao Peng, did you tell me this?" "certainly." "You should really be a writer!" I still feel the same way after all these years. "Don't look at me like that, Kao'er, why do you take everything I say as my lines?" Gao Peng gnawed on a crab, his expression puzzled, "Think about it, I narrowly escaped death in Lop Nur , the first thing I thought of was you. After I came to Tibet, I thought of you every day. I never dared to come back to see you because I always felt that I didn’t have enough ability to impress you. After returning to the mainland, I still didn’t have the courage to come to see you. I went to Shenzhen to explore the world, and my career has improved a bit, so I came back to Hunan to find you, but when I asked, your old man had already flown to the United States to bask in the sun..." "Then how did you buy the house in Spring on the other side?" "It's not that I miss you. I come here often. When I came here by chance, I bought it when I saw the notice of 'this house is for sale' posted on the side of the water. Anyway, after drifting for so many years, there is no place to stay, and the house is very expensive. That's right, the master moved to another place and sold it at a low price..." I looked at him, and I was inexplicably moved. In fact, everyone knows that he bought this house largely because the man I love lived there. Psychologically, he hoped to be closer to the man I yearned for, so as to be closer to him. Come closer to me.But he is stupid, a house is a house, a person is a person, they are completely different things.But I still admire him very much. He has a boldness that is rare for ordinary urban men. Now Gao Peng is not a little famous. He became famous because of a series of photos of Tibet taken two years ago.It is said that he is often invited to exhibit abroad, but photography is just a hobby for him now. His current identity is the boss of an advertising company in Shenzhen. With solid artistic skills, smart mind and free and easy personality, this kid is in There was such a boom over there, no wonder he was able to buy Zaishui in one go. I knew that no matter how cheap the house was, it would not be less than two million. With strength, he would even have the confidence to speak. "You are now enjoying both spiritual and material civilization." I like to make fun of him. Seeing him achieve so much, I am really happy for him from the bottom of my heart. Gao Peng, who used to be decadent and inferior Returning, it seems that the journey of life and death in Lop Nur has fulfilled his hope. "Let me tell you this, Kao'er, after a person crosses the line of life and death, many things have been seen through. Don't worry too much about it. The most important thing is to live sincerely and passionately. After I got my life back in Lop Nur, I arrived In Tibet, both the sky and the human heart are so pure that there is no impurity. I took a lot of photos and stayed there for a year. Gao Peng chewed a mouthful of crabs, and sure enough, he saw that his face was black and bright, his eyebrows were clear, and something enlightened was slowly flowing in his eyes, but he couldn't help frowning at my half-dead appearance, "Kao'er, why are you so thin?" Is it like this? I don’t know what happened to you after I left, but my dear, you see, I’ve escaped death, and I’m living a good life now? It’s best to keep everything in perspective and let nature take its course.” I sighed and shook my head, "But Gao Peng, in the world, all disasters and difficulties can be overcome. I am afraid that heaven will not fulfill people's wishes. I also want to be free. It is very difficult..." "It's not difficult!" He interrupted me and wiped his mouth, "Come with me to Shenzhen, let's have a good career, you can definitely come out, a rotten ghost like me can be reborn, what do you have? Can't?" "Nonsense, what can I do, you may not know, I haven't worked for several years." "Don't you know how to write? It's more than enough for advertising copywriting!" I still shook my head, Gao Peng continued to spare no effort to persuade me, and finally I agreed to go to Shenzhen not because he really persuaded me, but because I felt that if I stayed at home like this, I was afraid that I would go crazy, It's okay to go out for a change of air. Before going to Shenzhen, I stayed in Star City for two days, visited some old colleagues in the past, and gathered outside every day, temporarily forgetting a lot of past pain.But when Gao Peng invited me to his house as a guest, standing on the terrace, facing the lake full of spring water, my heart fell into deep sorrow again.The piano in the living room is still there. Gao Peng said that it was left behind by the master before he left, and it was included in the price. The sun shines on the piano through the floor-to-ceiling windows, and the black lacquer surface reflects dazzling brilliance. This high-mountain and flowing-water piano is destined to be hopeless with its owner. Seeing the piano is like seeing a person. I believe he will understand. Not only to escape Milan, but I am actually more afraid of facing his death, I can't imagine it, I can't think about it at all.And I promised him, to live a good life, his eyes are like God everywhere, if I sink here, he will be disappointed. When I played a LOVE theme song on the piano, Gao Peng was so surprised that he almost fell off the balcony, "Hey, you... When did you learn to play the piano?" He stammered while holding a cup of black tea. "Three years ago." Gao Peng sighed helplessly, "It seems that his position in your heart is really irreplaceable." "It's good that you know, Gao Peng." I sat on the piano bench and looked at him sideways, and said very seriously, "I promised to go to Shenzhen with you, it doesn't mean that I give you a chance, but that I really want to change the environment , live well." "Kao'er, you underestimated my pure heart. Am I the kind of villain who takes advantage of the situation? To be honest, your current appearance is really unbearable. I was scared when I met you outside the door that night." Jump, I thought what I saw was your undead... I am very distressed. Kaoer, you saved me, and now I want to save you too, so that you can find your courage and hope in another strange space, love You don’t need to look for it, I know you will let him live in your heart forever, how can I occupy your heart? I have always known myself, otherwise I would not have gone to Lop Nur to die three years ago, even if my career is not good now I've gotten better, and I don't have any unreasonable thoughts about you. There is a kind of love that can only survive in the heart, and it will die when you take it out. Besides, I have always been grateful to you. If it weren't for you, I would How can I find love and hope, so that I can live proudly until now?" "Gao Peng, you bastard!" I scolded him for seeing through me. "Yeah, my girlfriend has always scolded me like that," Gao Peng grinned. Friends!" "Really? Brat, you have the ability." "Thank you, Cole." He was "serious" again, but still looked stern.He squinted a pair of small eyes, and made a summary of himself, "I'm just like this, with tenacious vitality, and I can withstand any kind of blow. During more than a year in Tibet, I have no doubts about life, about life. I completely understood life, and almost became a lama... Later, I decided to return to the real world, because avoidance is the behavior of the weak, and I am a big man no matter what. Dolma told me that a man should be like a male. Soaring like an eagle in the sky..." "Who is Dolma?" "This..." Gao Peng was stunned, with a look of embarrassment on his face, "I will tell you again when I have a chance, I experienced a life-and-death love in Tibet, and this experience completely changed me." "Experience is sometimes a kind of wealth." I said sincerely. "Yeah, I cherish my past experiences very much now, no matter they are good or bad, they are worth cherishing with my life, because without those experiences, Gao Peng would not be able to achieve today's Gao Peng... Do you know? My My friends call me 'Camel', do you know that a camel is the most tenacious animal in the desert, any kind of wind and sand..." "Wait!" I interrupted him suddenly, pointing at him as if I saw a ghost and asked, "What did you just say?" "Me, what did I say?" "You said you were a camel?" "Well, that's what my friends call me." "Then have you ever held a photography exhibition in Busan, South Korea?" "How do you know? I have been there. Just last year, I was invited to hold a Tibetan folk customs exhibition there..." "Gao Peng!" I screamed, jumped up and rushed towards him, grabbed his collar and kicked him hard. "What are you doing, what are you doing, Kao'er?" Gao Peng was bewildered by my sudden fists and feet, he was defenseless, and I grabbed his ears and yelled viciously: "Brat, I want to kill you!..." "Help!" Gao Peng screamed. a month later. Shenzhen International Airport is full of people coming and going. Gao Peng and I have spent nearly two hours at the airport pick-up port, but we still haven’t waited for the flight from Seoul, South Korea.The radio explained that the plane was delayed because of the weather.Gao Peng was in a hurry, walked up and down in front of me with a straight face, and went outside to smoke several times. "Don't worry, it's just late." I comforted him. "Yes, it will be later." He also comforted himself.Judging by his appearance, it doesn't look like a joke, he is really in love.Just like when I saw Yingzhu at the beginning, it didn't seem like a game, so how could the dead girl be fascinated by the unattractive Gao Peng? "Fate, it's something that can't be explained clearly." Gao Peng was very proud when he talked about it. According to his dictation, he and Yingzhu met at a photography exhibition, but there were a lot of people at that time, and Yingzhu asked for an autograph, but neither of them left a deep impression on each other.But after work, they went to the ski resort to ski, and the two actually lived in the same room when they checked into the mountain hotel.Because of the heavy snowfall, they were trapped on the top of the mountain like other tourists, and the last room was seized by two people at the same time.Because they met each other, everyone was very polite and didn't think too deeply about it, but after Gao Peng chatted with his three-inch tongue for a whole night, Yingzhu fell in love with him the next morning. The two foreign men and women, who were originally out of reach, had a great feeling of seeing each other and hating each other, and quickly fell in love. "I can't figure it out either. You say she is beautiful. She is countless prettier than that girl. You say she is gentle. She...she is just..." Gao Peng always talked about his love with Yingzhu in happiness. Trembling, I knew at a glance that this kid must have suffered from Yingzhu's fists a lot. 可感情这种事就是这么奇怪，一物降一物，看上去完全不搭界的人没准就能擦出火花，就像我跟耿墨池……一想到他，我心底就割裂般的疼痛，已经很久没有他的消息了，打电话给安妮，她说她哥哥回了趟新西兰后就消失了，没有人知道他现在游走在世界的哪个角落，可能，他是真的消失在这世界上了……来深圳的这一个月里，白天我勉强还能应对，晚上独处时就抓狂，他的面容、他的声音无论是在清醒时还是梦境中，都在我脑海中挥之不去。 高澎很善解人意，工作之余带我到处兜风散心，认识各种新朋友，以为这样我就可以缓解内心撕裂般的疼痛，但是，我知道这是徒劳。 就在一个礼拜前，妹妹白崴突然打电话给我，说耿墨池去湘北找过我，还留下了一封信。我要妹妹发特快专递把信寄过来，一天就到了。打开信一看，信中就一个地址： “西雅图湖景墓园，××××号。” 当时我正在高澎公司的办公室里跟同事说笑聊天，看到这个地址一下就旁若无人地号啕大哭起来，没有人知道发生了什么，谁都劝不住。 只有我知道，这个地址就是耿墨池在西雅图买下的墓地，他曾经跟我提过，他希望死后能葬在西雅图，无所谓故土，无所谓落叶归根，他就是喜欢这个城市。而我还知道，他买下的肯定是个双人墓，这个墓地就在西雅图联合湖区以南的一个山丘上，视野开阔，迷人的海港就在山脚下，西雅图不眠夜，从此永恒！他告诉我这个地址，就是表示他会在那里等我，什么多余的话都不会说，也不用来找我，他知道我会明白。 “她来了！！”高澎猛地拽住我的胳膊往前面拖。 我这才醒过神，在人群中搜索，一眼就看到了一身韩派打扮的崔英珠拖着行李朝我们飞奔过来，但她并没注意到我，只看到了高澎，因为我们事先都严格保密了的，并没有告诉她我和高澎认识。她扑进高澎的怀里又叫又跳，搂住他的脖子狼吻，看得我都不好意思了。 “亲爱的，亲爱的，你等会儿，我给你介绍一个人，”高澎拉开英珠的胳膊，把神秘的“礼物”推到了她面前，“这是白考儿，我最好的朋友……” 英珠的目光转到了我的脸上，这才发现了我的存在，她的瞳孔跟猫眼似的忽大忽小，而我在她的瞳孔中却似一只微笑的老鼠，“噢——哟——”她一声嗷叫，母猫瞬间变成母狼，一脚踹开男友高澎，张牙舞爪地就冲我扑了过来，“我要吃了你，Cathy！……” “救命！”我夺路而逃。 两个小时后我们在南山的一家湘菜楼吃饭。 “你们中国真是太好了，多么美丽的国家，我上个月在北京游览回国后就跟我爸妈正式提出要到中国来，他们开始都不答应，但我不管了，前仆后继地来到中国，为的就是跟我心爱的男人白……白头那个什么……我爱中国，爱这里的一切，告诉你们，我不回去了，我要娶我的男人……” “等等，亲爱的，是你嫁给我，不是你娶我……”高澎纠正女友的口误，英珠的中文其实还可以的，就是常常词不达意，比如刚才她把“不顾一切、义无反顾”说成“前仆后继”。以前在西雅图我们多是用英文交流，还感觉不出什么，现在她用中文说话，直听得我一愣一愣的，目瞪口呆。 “你给我闭嘴！”英珠不由分说地在桌子底下踢了一脚高澎，一脸恶相，“当然是我娶你，你可是答应过我的，今后无论我们过得怎样，你都要以我为中心，要为我买牛买马，这辈子都听我招呼……” “买牛买马？” “是……是做牛做马……”高澎低声解释。 我竭力忍住笑。 “做牛做马？”英珠眉头紧蹙，很是疑惑，“我们是人类呢，怎么做得出牛马？做出BABY还差不多。” 我身子往后一仰，差点翻倒在地。 在韩国，老板是被称为“社长”的，自从英珠来到公司，一切都在迅速韩化，不仅要求员工一律称高澎为社长，见了面打招呼点头都不行，还得鞠躬，“社长，您早！”这样的话从员工嘴里说出来，总是感觉怪怪的，连高澎也不适应，抓耳挠腮的，不知道怎么回应。每次瞅他那尴尬样，我都躲一边偷笑。但英珠做事是很认真的，非常严谨，这跟她在美国多年的求学经历有关，工作时半句玩笑话都没有（跟我也如此），严厉又不失风度，很注意自己在员工面前的形象。可下了班，她就露出本来面目了，不是抓着我满城寻美食，就是押着我陪她到处找乐子，哪里好玩往哪里挤，这时候，高澎的身份只有两个，一是司机，二是付账的。 白天我们三个人是工作伙伴，晚上就是三个疯子，有时候更像孩子，嬉笑打闹无所不为。我住的地方跟他们的公寓在一栋楼，有时候闹晚了我就睡在他们公寓，确切地说，我们根本就没睡，放点舒缓的音乐，开瓶好的红酒，弄点水果沙拉点心之类的，坐沙发上的，趴地毯上的，聚精会神地听高澎谈他的人生奇遇。罗布泊、可可西里、西藏、新疆，在高澎的描述下异常生动，充满传奇色彩，我不得不承认，高澎其实是个很有魅力的男人，他深邃迷离的内心世界让每个接近他的人都着迷，我终于明白英珠为什么那么迷他，尽管她总是很凶的样子，可眼神中流露出来的温柔爱恋就是个瞎子都感觉得到。他们是幸福的一对！ 至于高澎经营的公司，很大程度上是他个人艺术的实践地。搞摄影出身，加之丰富的人生阅历，对事物的独到见解，使得高澎在深圳广告界如鱼得水。据他说，公司建成初期要靠他们自身去拉业务，可是现在，很多客户都是主动找上门的，悬挂在市区各个醒目位置的精彩广告就是公司的活广告。高澎既是老板，又是设计总监，具体的市场运作都交给了英珠打理，我在公司只负责文案及策划，大家合作挺默契。 七月的时候，公司接到一个地产广告，是个大客户，高澎亲自操刀。对于设计上的事，英珠是从不干涉他的，百分之百地相信他，我也很相信他，通常是他拿出草图，我在上面设计文案即可。我问英珠，什么样的客户，让高澎这么重视。 英珠说是个香港客户，刚在南山开发了个时尚楼盘“盛世华园”，很挑剔。据说是换了好几个广告公司都不满意，这次是经人介绍主动来找高澎的。 两天后，高澎兴高采烈地拿出了背景草图，在图纸展开的刹那，猝不及防的心痛一下击倒了我，画面虽然经过一定的艺术处理，但还是如此熟悉，璀璨的灯火港湾前，太空针傲然独立，一对热烈缠绵的男女在夜空下拥吻，风吹乱了他们的头发，仿佛整个世界只剩下他们俩……这不是电影《西雅图不眠夜》的剧照吗？ “怎么了，考儿？”高澎丢下画稿扶住摇晃着身子的我。 “没，没什么。”我摆摆手。眼眶中陡然漾满泪水。 高澎疑惑地看着我，“怎么突然哭了？” “怎么选这个背景？” “英珠给的创意，她不是从西雅图过来的嘛。” “换个吧。”我无力地说。 “这个……”高澎有些迟疑，“我觉得挺好的啊，那个楼盘建在一个山丘上，可以很好地俯瞰城市的夜景，跟《西雅图不眠夜》正好不谋而合。” 我没有再说什么，盯着那画卷发愣。 “考儿，我真觉得这个创意不错。”高澎见我没表态，有些急了。 “那就用这个吧。”我给了他确切的答复。 “行，那你赶紧把文案做出来，那边等着要呢。”高澎见我认可了草图很高兴，又说，“对了，今晚那个香港老板请我们公司的人吃饭，你也一起去吧。” 我颓然地摇头，“我就算了。” “这怎么行呢？人家指明要跟设计者谈的。” “我又不是这个广告的设计者。” “当然是啊，文案不就是你设计的嘛。” “我还没设计。” “那就更要跟人家谈了，知道了对方的想法，不是更有利于你写文案吗？”这家伙又开始卖弄他的三寸不烂之舌了。 "Gao Peng..." "Kaoer!" “社长先生！” 高澎一听我这么叫他，简直要晕倒，英珠正好过来，知道了原委后不顾自己的形象，一把掐住我的脖子，“你不去也得去，那家伙我见过，很帅的啊，不去太可惜了！” “还有我帅吗？”高澎感觉良好地摸摸自己的头发。 “一个驴，一个马，你说谁帅？” “你、你说我是驴？”高澎大受打击。 “难道你认为你是马？”英珠拍拍他的脸蛋，“如果一定要算你是马，那也不可能是白马……” “什么马？” “斑马。” 晚上，在福田的一家西餐厅，我见到了这位被英珠形容成比白马还白马的“王子”，那个男人坐在包房的一角，三十四五岁，一袭蓝色西服，气质卓然。他是侧着脸的，专注地跟另一个男人说着话，偶尔非常礼貌地笑笑，很绅士的样子。 当我们走进去时，那个男人忽然别过脸来，目光刚好跟我撞个正着，他一怔，有几秒钟的失神。我亦是当头一棒，愣在原地，那男人果然很帅，轮廓仿如雕刻，头发修剪有型，蓝色西服里面的条纹立领小衬衣极好地衬托了他的高贵儒雅，嘴角浅含笑意，让人移不开视线。 很明显，他比视频中更加赏心悦目，难怪安妮钟情于他，他实在是个迷人的男人。 我瞪大眼睛就快要呼吸不上来，这世上有这么巧的事吗？ 高澎将我介绍给他，“这位就是我们广告部的才女白考儿。”陈锦森唇畔的笑意更深了，风度翩翩地朝我伸出手，声音醇厚动听：“你好，我是陈锦森，你可以叫我Keven。” 我恍惚着点头，“你好，没想到在这儿见到你。” “这就是缘分！”他松开我的手。 不知怎么的，那一刻我只觉神思游离，我感觉命运又对我露出了诡异的笑脸，它一定在策划着更大的阴谋，想置我于死地吗？还是想让我直接下地狱？ 一个礼拜后，文案出来了，我在高澎的草图上写上了两句话： 这是《西雅图不眠夜》里的一句著名的演说词，我用在了广告上。高澎将文字作了一定的艺术处理，效果居然还很不错，交给合作公司，对方很满意，老板甚至亲自打电话向我致谢：“谢谢你的设计，很不错！” "You flatter me." “哪里，你确实设计得很好，尤其是那两句话我很喜欢，我也相信人和人的奇遇，而且我也相信我已经遇到。” 我不置可否，心想你有没有奇遇跟我有什么关系？ 但是深夜站在公寓的阳台上，吹着南方城市特有的闷热的暖风，我也在想自己的“奇遇”，很多都不太愿去想，我只是在思索，上帝降临的下一个“奇遇”会是什么？我无助地仰望着深圳的夜空，星星们无言地注视着这个美丽的城市，嘴角带有一丝嘲弄的笑容。因为它们知道，无论这城市里的人在忙着什么，劳碌奔波也好，随波逐流也好，所有的努力结果很有可能就是一无所获！ 这座城市永远是希望和绝望共存。就像我对爱情，也是希望和绝望共存。白天的忙碌可以让人忘却很多，可是下班后一个人回到公寓，我抑郁得要发狂。很多时候我没有直接回家，拖着疲惫的身体在喧嚣的街上闲逛。有一天逛到一家国际名店的门口，平常我也经过这儿，却从来没进去过，因为里面的东西不是我现在这种经济状况可以问津的，虽然高澎给我不菲的薪水，但现在我除了薪水，没有任何经济来源，想想自己都三十多岁的人了，折腾了这么多年还是一无所有，连个固定的住所都没有。难怪爸妈对我灰心到极点。我自己也是。 但我也顾不得那么多了，看看又不要钱，反正到哪儿都是一逛。店里果然是气派非凡，高雅的音乐流淌在每个角落，安静中透出不可一世的华贵，逛的人并不多，里边很安静。我很快就逛完了大半个商场，逛这么快是因为我不敢在各个品牌服装前久留，稍有停顿，美丽的店员小姐就会说：“小姐您喜欢的话可以试试，都是最新的款式，跟巴黎同步上市的……”我哪敢试这里的衣服，根本就是走马观花，连牌子都没看清就匆匆地走过去了，但在某个熟悉的牌子前，我停住了脚步，那个牌子的衣服耿墨池衣橱中最多，想来他是很喜欢的。 我挪不动脚步了，衣线笔挺的西服，简约而华贵，正是我熟悉的风格和气息，我的视力不由自主地模糊起来，恍惚中他就穿着那身西服站在那儿冲我微笑，风度翩翩，气度不凡。 “是你吗？Cathy！”他走过来惊喜地跟我打招呼。我一个激灵，定定神，这才发现站在我面前的不是他，“哦，我……”我支吾着不知怎么回答。 “真是很意外啊，果然是人和人的奇遇，我好高兴！”陈锦森朝我伸出了手，我迟疑了一下也客气地朝他伸出了手。几秒钟的停留而已，我就感觉他有一双高贵优雅的手，没有具体的标准，仅仅是感觉。可能是天气的原因，他没穿西装，一身浅米色便服，依然是英俊得无懈可击的脸，闪烁的目光，和足以融化世间万物的微笑，我的心咚咚地乱跳起来。How did that happen?strangeness! “陈先生……也来买衣服啊？”我左顾右盼，不敢直视他，感觉耳根后面一阵发热。 “Cathy，见外了吧，叫我Keven就可以，我们又不是不认识。”陈锦森笑着走近我，迅速地扫了我全身一眼，目光停留在我的脸上，“你也在买衣服吗？”他客气地俯身问，目光很烫人。 “我……随便看看……”我局促地笑笑，心想这里的衣服我哪里买得起。 “哦，有喜欢的吗？”陈锦森环顾四周，并不明白我的窘境，只是体贴地说，“要不要帮你参考？嗯，VERSACE不错啊，我也很喜欢这个牌子，试试吧，你穿一定很合适。” 我感觉自己从未那么光彩照人过，当我穿着一件镶着水钻的黑色天鹅绒连身裙从试衣间走出来时，一旁的店员小姐连连称赞，周围试衣的顾客也惊讶地频频朝这边看，这让坐在一边休息的陈锦森很是得意。他起身来到我的背后，欣赏地看着镜中的天仙，不动声色，却用他极具穿透力的微笑在攻击我坚强的防备，我忽然觉得很紧张，心跳得更快了。 “你很美！”他由衷地说。 从店里出来，陈锦森又邀请我共进晚餐，提着他送的衣服，看着他真诚而炽热的目光，我好像很难拒绝，况且我也很想知道安妮的近况。他领着我来到国贸对面的一家西餐厅，面对面地在靠窗的正方形餐台前落座。这时候我的心情稍微放松了些，陈锦森亲切而礼貌地跟我交谈着，问我生活和工作的一些情况，点到即止，绝不刨根问底，很有教养也很能揣摩人的心理。 他的好教养还表现在他饭桌上的礼仪，喝汤或是切牛排时不慌不忙，刀呀叉呀什么的也用得一丝不苟，进食时也是文明有序。看得我都不好意思起来，我可没那么多规矩，牛排切得乱七八糟不说，还把汤泼在了干净的台布上，至于那些个刀叉在我手里更是不听使唤，叮叮咚咚弄得一片响。 “要不要我帮你？”陈锦森放下手里的汤匙笑着问。 “谢谢，我能应付，”我窘得满脸通红，“我只是不太习惯吃西餐。” “那你事先应该说啊，我以为你喜欢的，对不起啊……”陈锦森显出很歉意的表情，好像我吃不好西餐是他的错。说来也真是难以置信，在美国生活了两年，连起码的西餐刀具都没拿顺手，英文到现在都是半生不熟的。 “安妮呢，她现在怎么样？”我小心地询问道，因为我看他的脸色，似乎有意在回避着什么，他没有主动提及安妮就是个明证。 果然，他眼中有些微妙的情绪变化，笑了笑，“我……跟她已经分手了……” “什么？分手？！”我吃惊不小，刀叉也随之掉到了地上。服务员马上过来帮我捡起，并送上干净的餐具。陈锦森不慌不忙地用餐巾抹抹嘴角，漫不经心的样子，“怎么，她没有跟你说吗？” “没有啊，前阵子跟她打电话都没听她说，好好的，怎么就……” “缘分嘛，很难说的。”陈锦森避重就轻，迅速转移话题，“你什么时候来深圳的？能遇见你真的让我很高兴！” “两三个月前吧。”我回答得心不在焉，脑子里闪出安妮天使一样美丽的面孔，看来她的任性和娇纵还是一点没改，要不好好的恋爱怎么说结束就结束了呢？ 吃完饭陈锦森礼貌地开车送我回南山的公寓。他好像故意把车开得很慢，不慌不忙地跟我说着话，两个人突然局限在狭小的车内，气氛变得微妙而又惊心动魄起来，我不敢正视他，望着车窗外出神。此时正是这个城市夜色繁华到极点的时候，我们的车夹在流淌的灯河中，只剩两个亮点，我莫名有些心跳加速，因为我发觉他在用余光打量我。 直觉这个男人很危险！这危险源于他身上自然散发出来的某种洁净迷离的气息，若有若无地弥漫在空气中，他用了香水，很高贵很内敛的那种。我以前一直不太欣赏男人用香水，自己也很少用，直到遇见耿墨池。耿墨池是从巴黎过来的，除了他，我还没见过用香水用得如此绝妙的男人，那淡淡的优雅气息时刻在梦中唤醒我麻木的记忆神经，可是今天在陈锦森身上，我竟然被味道不同却一样蛊惑人心的男性气息所迷惑，这就是我心跳加速的原因？ “Cathy，我们应该多见面，缘分这个东西是转瞬即逝的。”陈锦森把车停在小区门口，话说得很深。我别过脸，装作没听见。他下车亲自为我拉开车门，还给了我一张名片，平静的微笑无法掩饰他眼中的迷乱和不舍。 “谢谢你的晚餐，”我礼貌地朝他点点头，又扬起购物的包装袋，“还有你送的衣服，再见！”说完我转身就走。 “Cathy！”他在背后叫住我，突然抛出一句英文，“I really believe in people and their adventure in their life，you should also believe...（我绝对相信人和人的奇遇，你也应该相信。）” 一连几天上班我都走神，心不在焉，不是张冠李戴搞混了文案，就是同事跟我说话时，我答非所问。实在进入不了工作状况，我只好放下手头的事，泡杯茶闷闷地发呆。 我已经很久没喝过咖啡了，潜意识里很害怕那种熟悉的味道。可是我连做梦都梦到西雅图的味道，那温暖的浓香，如久别的故人反复出现在梦境中，或近或远，可望而不可即，我贪婪地呼吸着，咖啡的浓香渐渐变成了他的味道，淡雅温暖，熟悉而安详的感觉一下就包围住我，梦里有淡淡的香烟气息，还有隐约的薄荷香气。那正是他的味道！ 我常常在梦境中哭泣到天明。醒来只觉虚弱，连翻身的力气都没有。那晚我又梦见了他，朦蒙眬胧的身影，衬着西雅图的灯火港湾，我试图靠近他，可是就要接近他的时候，梦就醒了。天已大亮，清晨的阳光透过纱帘照耀进房间，我无力地靠在床头，深深地吸气，好半天不能确认自己还活着。随后我打电话到美国，还是茱莉娅接的电话。 “先生回来过没有？” “回来过一次，又出门了。” “去哪儿了？” "have no idea." 我坐巴士魂不守舍地到公司上班，一进门就看见工作台上放着一大捧白玫瑰，满室玫瑰的芬芳，新鲜万分。我看着那捧玫瑰一阵发愣。英珠正好推门进来，夸张地叫嚷着，飞身就扑过去翻花间插的签名，“Keven？哪个神仙？” 我默不作声地坐下工作。 “哇，荷兰空运过来的吧。”英珠好像很识货，嗅着玫瑰哇哇叫，“死丫头，你怎么总是比我走运，老是被优秀的男人垂青。” “你的骆驼不优秀吗？” 英珠哼了声，咬牙切齿，“这家伙，从认识他到现在，我连狗尾巴花都没收到过，哪像你，一收就收这么名贵的玫瑰，很贵的啊，如今买这种花大把送人的男人可不多见。” 我打开电脑敷衍着说：“在深圳有钱的男人多了。” “那你就好好把握啊，谈场恋爱吧，女人是不能没有爱情滋润的，否则就会比这花还要枯萎得快！” “我已经枯萎了。” “嘁！”英珠捧着花爱不释手，我就做了个顺水人情，“花送你吧，如果你喜欢。” "real?" “不就是一束花嘛，拿去吧。” 英珠扑过来在我脸颊上狠狠地亲了口，“这还差不多，算我没白疼你！” 半个小时后，陈锦森突然出现在会议室，我一点心理准备都没有，昨天听高澎说今天有个很重要的谈判，原来对手就是他！谈判桌上，他气宇轩昂地跟高澎谈合同，游刃有余，运筹帷幄，显然是谈判的高手。自始至终，我没有说过一句话，埋头用笔装作记录着什么。但我感觉得到，他炽热的目光时不时地掠过我的脸庞，让我更加不敢抬头看他。谈判进行到一半，到了用餐时间，高澎做东盛情邀